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Best way to present ring? get setting or not??

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JoeB

Rough_Rock
Joined
May 22, 2003
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I''ve basically decided on the diamond.. it''s a 1ct princess cut VS1 (but looks more like VVS since we can''t find anything wrong with it under 10X or even under microscope!) and G color.

It''s also a perfect square with medium gridle and faint blue florecense... really really happy with it. I''m even getting it lasered with a note + certificate on the side.

The only thing I''m not sure about is the setting.. So the jewller told me that he''d be more than happy to put it temporarly into a solitaire setting and then come back and decide on the final setting.

Do you folks think it''s a good idea?? (both financially and emotionally?) I want to hear from the women in the croud too!

Thanks in advance.
 

Adrienne

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Feb 15, 2003
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120
Congratulations on finding a diamond!!!

Yup, I like the idea of the temporarily solitaire setting. It allows her to walk around looking at (and showing off) her diamond, and also allows her to help choose the permanent setting for her diamond.

Besides - for an engagement I still love the classic solitaire. It's wonderful to upgrade to a fancy ring for the wedding, but there is something incredibly simple, elegant and romantic about the solitaire.

 

Nate

Shiny_Rock
Joined
May 17, 2003
Messages
211
Don't mean to alarm you, but I know my fiancee thinks its lame to use a temporary setting. It all depends on your girl. The flip side is that you have to get a setting she really really likes.
In my case she gave me some ideas (3 stone ring) and I've looked at tons and tons of settings. I finally found one that I think is really nice and I'm going to just hope she likes it. You can see the thread about my setting adventures here.

You can also check out this page of settings I made for mi amore to help her figure out what she wants.
 

Adrienne

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Feb 15, 2003
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120
Yeah, as Nate suggested, if you are absolutely sure what your girlfriend would like - then go ahead and purchase it.

I would be terribly disappointed, however, if I received an engagement ring that I wasn't overly fond of - yes, it would be special and I would love being engaged, but I would be so sad that I didn't just love the ring... then I'd feel guilty, and if I told him he would feel sad...

So I would still prefer the temporary setting - besides, then you can choose the setting together. It's a lot more fun that way!

so I guess it comes down to how well you know your girlfriend, and how many hints she is giving you as to a style!
 

aljdewey

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 25, 2002
Messages
9,144
Congrats....the stone sounds gorgeous!

Have to disagree with the others so far....I would absolutely go with a temporary setting.

If she decides she likes it, she can of course keep it. But you can tell her that you want her to have exactly the setting she wants, and that you're willing to shop WITH her for it.

A temp setting will allow her to wear the ring right away while she searches for the perfect setting.
 

kiwifuz

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 11, 2003
Messages
74
I'd much rather have a temporary setting than just a diamond. I'd want to show it off right away on my finger, not sitting in my hand...
 

fire&ice

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 22, 2002
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7,828
I vote temporary setting. She will go nuts if she can not wear it right away. It won't feel offical.

Nate, the question to ask your financee is would she have prefered "no" setting to a temporary setting?
 

aljdewey

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 25, 2002
Messages
9,144

----------------
On 5/27/2003 8:18:58 AM fire&ice wrote:
I vote temporary setting. She will go nuts if she can not wear it right away. It won't feel offical.

Nate, the question to ask your financee is would she have prefered "no" setting to a temporary setting? ----------------
F&I.....as usual, GREAT point. It seems that Nate and his gf have been talking throughout the process, and that's great. He has the advantage of knowing what his gf wants and has given her some things to select from.

JoeB, if you are similarly talking to your gf about the ring, and it's not a total surprise, then certainly get her input on setting.

But it sounds to me like you are doing this as a total surprise. I agree with F&I....it won't feel "official" if she's got the loose stone but cannot put it on her finger and say to people "we're engaged!"

 

JoeB

Rough_Rock
Joined
May 22, 2003
Messages
11
Thank you for all the feedback..

yes.. it is a surprise! And I want to make sure it really is the setting she wants (after all, it's the one thing she'll wear for the rest of her life!)
 

Mara

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Oct 30, 2002
Messages
31,003
Yes temp setting all the way.
 

Nate

Shiny_Rock
Joined
May 17, 2003
Messages
211
----------------
On 5/27/2003 8:18:58 AM fire&ice wrote:
Nate, the question to ask your financee is would she have prefered "no" setting to a temporary setting?
----------------
Oh yeah, I'm sure a temp setting is better than just a loose stone!
 

kassina

Rough_Rock
Joined
May 28, 2003
Messages
1
I'm one of the sentimental types. I was engaged last year with a HOF solitaire, just under a half carat. The setting is a 14kyg Stuller Solstice with a low 4 prong head. I absolutely love the ring and wouldn't dream of "upgrading" the diamond or changing the setting. Since I plan on keeping the ring indefinitely, I would have preferred platinum for the durability. The yellow does look better with my skin tone, though. I didn't have much say in selecting the ring or the stone... it was a complete surprise.
Another reason I didn't switch the setting is that tastes can change over time. I decided that if I want to change the look, I can have some fun with wraps and ring guards. And that way, I still have the original ring. If I get a larger diamond down the road, it'll be in a separate ring and not as an upgrade for the original engagement diamond.
I seem to be the exception on the temporary setting issue. There are about a half dozen women in my social circle who are recently engaged. They all have diamonds roughly twice the size of mine and they all swapped the original setting.
It just depends on the girl. I don't know what I would've done if I didn't like my ring, but that didn't happen so no worries! There is always that risk, though. Aside from the sentimental issue, I would prefer a temporary setting over one I didn't like.
 
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