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Are you resilient?

missy

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Part 1 of my question is: Do you consider yourself resilient?
Part 2 is: Do you consider yourself happy?
Whatever happy means to you.

calvinandhobbesresilient.png

I think these 2 personal attributes are linked. Are they connected for you too?
 

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Mamabean

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Yes..Definitely to both!
 

TooPatient

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Until 20 months ago, I would have said not resilient. I had been through lots of struggles with work, layoff, custody fights, and so much more but never thought of that as anything but just part of life. Dealing with MS has made me face things I never thought I could. Now I have a herniated disc and will be having spine surgery. These are the challenges I always thought of as showing resilience. Funny thing is that now I am not as sure! I don't have a choice in these things. They happen and I can't do anything about it. Does that make me resilient? Or maybe it was the stuff before that I could handle differently but chose to stick with it rather than taking an easier way out.

Happy? I think I am mostly happy.
 

Madam Bijoux

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A person has to be resilient. People who are not resilient go the way of the dinosaur.
 

Gussie

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I sure hope so. In the past 2 weeks I have had a squamous cell skin cancer removed, an endometrial biopsy (benign, thank goodness) and I just got called back for a diagnostic mammogram. When it rains, it pours! Gratitude gets me through it all.
 

Slick1

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I think I am resilient. I’ve been told I am very strong after the health issues I have had. :sick:
I am happy, though I suppose I could be happier since getting older, with all of its accompanying problems, isn’t for the faint of heart. :boohoo:
 

kenny

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I'm very resilient, but I'd estimate my happiness at around 60%.

But being resilient, I see that glass as 60% full.
 

Bonfire

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I sure hope so. In the past 2 weeks I have had a squamous cell skin cancer removed, an endometrial biopsy (benign, thank goodness) and I just got called back for a diagnostic mammogram. When it rains, it pours! Gratitude gets me through it all.
{{{{Hugs and dust!!}}}}
 

dk168

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Yes to both.

DK :))
 

Begonia

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Sometimes I’m resilient, and sometimes I just cave. If I’m not sleeping well (I have insomnia), I cave a lot. Happiness? I don’t feel happy often (but I do have happy moments), the feeling is more of content gratitude.
 

foxinsox

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Yes - I'm lucky enough that my brain is wired to be pretty resilient by nature. The last 6 or so years has tested that though, so I've really had to learn how to support that with better self care because otherwise I just get overwhelmed.
 

Daisys and Diamonds

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im resilient in that i fall over a lot but i get back up - all be it with scrapped knees
i don't have any other alternative but to be resilient and ive always felt like that

i guess im happy more than unhappy but im looking forward to better days
i don't think happiness and being resilient is related - for me anyway
 

jordyonbass

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More resilient than ever! And yes, I do consider myself happy at this point. Things were going very well but I hit a rocky stage about 12 months ago, some events with my parents as well as the serious car wreck that I was in back in May. Once Finn came along though it has been nothing but on the up and up since. That little guy has put me back on track and just made everything better :love:
And he's made me realise I can put myself through a lot more if I am doing it for him and my wife.
 

missy

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I sure hope so. In the past 2 weeks I have had a squamous cell skin cancer removed, an endometrial biopsy (benign, thank goodness) and I just got called back for a diagnostic mammogram. When it rains, it pours! Gratitude gets me through it all.
Sending you many good thoughts and good wishes @Gussie. Glad your biopsy was benign and may all the rest be fine as well. I am with you in that gratitude and appreciation goes a long way in helping the way we feel about things we cannot control. (((Hugs))).
 

missy

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Sometimes I’m resilient, and sometimes I just cave. If I’m not sleeping well (I have insomnia), I cave a lot. Happiness? I don’t feel happy often (but I do have happy moments), the feeling is more of content gratitude.
I think when we do not sleep well we are more vulnerable and our threshold for dealing with cra* is much lower than when we are sleeping well. Dear @Begonia I feel your pain re sleep. As for content gratitude I think that qualifies (for me) as happiness. When one is content that is a peaceful kind of happiness (for me).
 

missy

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More resilient than ever! And yes, I do consider myself happy at this point. Things were going very well but I hit a rocky stage about 12 months ago, some events with my parents as well as the serious car wreck that I was in back in May. Once Finn came along though it has been nothing but on the up and up since. That little guy has put me back on track and just made everything better :love:
And he's made me realise I can put myself through a lot more if I am doing it for him and my wife.
Yes you are very resilient and strong and having children one must rise to the occasion. It's the only right thing to do. Finn is a very lucky little boy to have you and your dw for loving parents.
 

missy

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im resilient in that i fall over a lot but i get back up - all be it with scrapped knees
i don't have any other alternative but to be resilient and ive always felt like that

i guess im happy more than unhappy but im looking forward to better days
i don't think happiness and being resilient is related - for me anyway
You are a strong woman Daisy, scrapped knees and all. We have that in common re the knees lol. Interesting your viewpoint re resiliency and happiness. As I wrote we are all different and for me I think it is linked. When I feel weak and scared I am unhappy but when I stand and fight despite the challenges it makes me feel alive and in a big way happy. And less scared. Life has a way of beating us up in many ways and what matters is we keep getting up to fight another day and rise to any challenge that comes our way. We cannot control much but we can control how we react to each situation and our attitude to it all. I keep reminding myself of that. And of course one of my favorite quotes.

"We can make a hell of heaven and a heaven of hell"

True dat.
 

missy

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Yes..Definitely to both!
Yes to both.
Life is good, every day! Yes to both,
I agree. No matter how challenging things get I am content and for the most part happy. I define that as satisfied and content and overall pleased with life. No matter the external things happening I am content and at peace. Every single moment is not happy however and I do not expect it to be. Life is tough and challenging and not perfect but happiness comes from within and not from external experiences. And for the most part I feel happy.
 

kipari

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Great question, @missy!

1. ) Yes. I never forget anything bad or difficult, but learn from it and then move on and apply the new lessons in the future.
2.) Yes


I consciously take a step back from time to time and savour how lucky and happy I am : loving marriage to my soul mate, healthy and wonderful children, healthy hubby and myself, loyal friends ... The rest is gravy and we have our share: comfortable home, enough vacation, parachute pack in case of emergency. Would I like more money/bling/my size 4 back? Sure.. But then I'd have to make adjustments in other departments. So my priorites, my choice. I own it.

Easy to forget in the woes of everyday annoyances.
 

missy

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Yes - I'm lucky enough that my brain is wired to be pretty resilient by nature. The last 6 or so years has tested that though, so I've really had to learn how to support that with better self care because otherwise I just get overwhelmed.
I think you are right. We are hardwired to be happy or not and I also think we can change the way we think and become more happy or less happy than how we were initially hardwired. I get you re being overwhelmed occasionally and sometimes when that happens I have to talk myself back to ground earth and not let myself get carried away with worry and stress. Sometimes I lose my sense of well being but for short times only and I always can talk myself down to reality and a better frame of mind. But yeah we have to work at it sometimes because life can get overwhelming and stressful. Glad you know to take good care of yourself especially during such stressful times.
 

missy

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Until 20 months ago, I would have said not resilient. I had been through lots of struggles with work, layoff, custody fights, and so much more but never thought of that as anything but just part of life. Dealing with MS has made me face things I never thought I could. Now I have a herniated disc and will be having spine surgery. These are the challenges I always thought of as showing resilience. Funny thing is that now I am not as sure! I don't have a choice in these things. They happen and I can't do anything about it. Does that make me resilient? Or maybe it was the stuff before that I could handle differently but chose to stick with it rather than taking an easier way out.

Happy? I think I am mostly happy.
@TooPatient I am lucky to know you and I am glad you are such a strong and courageous person. You have been through so much and you have met each challenge admirably and done your best. You are an amazing example to all who know and love you. You always have a choice. Rise to the challenge or give up. You have always risen to each challenge. Kudos to you. Never sell yourself short. You are resilient.
 

missy

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missy

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missy

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I'm very resilient, but I'd estimate my happiness at around 60%.

But being resilient, I see that glass as 60% full.
That's pretty good @kenny. I don't think 100% is attainable or even desirable. But that is a thread for another day I think.
 

missy

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I think I am resilient. I’ve been told I am very strong after the health issues I have had. :sick:
I am happy, though I suppose I could be happier since getting older, with all of its accompanying problems, isn’t for the faint of heart. :boohoo:
You are one of the strongest people I know @Slick1 and you are so right. Aging aint for sissies. Who said that? I want to say Bette Davis but now I am not sure. But whoever it was it was a wise person indeed. Of course it beats the alternative any day! And you got through the toughest part and now it will be (I hope) smooth sailing my dear friend. (((Hugs))).
 
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