Are you faithful when you dream?

[YadaYadaYada]

If you are married or in a committed relationship and you dream do you stay faithful in the dream?

As an example, I had a dream about my husband's cousin recently but even though we hugged in the dream I thought to myself, this can't go further since I'm married. Just to be clear, I don't have any romantic feelings for him and don't even know how he popped up since I haven't seen him in months.

When you dream, do you have dreams where you know it isn't real life and go ahead and have a little fling or a little naughtiness?

 

[chemgirl]

I have all sorts of weird dreams about people I never even think about while awake.

Some gross me out when I wake up and realize what I was dreaming about.

So ya, not faithful, but I also don't make a decision to go with it.

 

[stracci2000]

I dont recall any "cheating" dreams, but have dreams where I am hugging other men, with no sexual feelings.
Just long hugs, of affection.
Sometimes the men are friends or co-workers, and sometimes the man is a celebrity. Weird......

 

[House Cat]

No cheating dreams.

I have a recurring dream that I am back with my abusive ex and I am have this gnawing feeling that I don't belong there anymore. It is all dark and I am searching for something...

I always wake up relieved.

 

[kenny]

Hell no!

 

[monarch64]

Hell no!

Thanks for the laugh! This is me: I have sex dreams during certain times of the month (ovulation typically) and always in the morning at which point my testosterone levels must be highest. I always get so pissed when I wake up before things are heading towards the finale! It's almost always randoms without faces--maybe that is my subconscious' way of allowing me to explore in my sleep and not f*&k around when I'm awake! The dreams don't bother me. They don't bother my husband, either, especially when he reaps the benefits.

 

[Puppmom]

I don't recall any cheating dreams but someone was telling me how they called their husband by the wrong name in bed and I had a recurring nightmare for weeks that I called my husband the name of a coworker. I was literally dreading going to sleep!

 

[AprilBaby]

guilty

 

[azstonie]

Guilty

I feel like some of the dreams are my way of tying off loose ends in old relationships that I didn't have the skills to do better with back in my bad old days. Some of them involve guys I was attracted to while I was in college but I never acted on.

 

[missy]

I am so boring lol. I am completely faithful when I dream. So far at least.

 

[diamondringlover]

no I am not faithful when I dream...I have some pretty good dreams too

 

[CJ2008]

Hell no!

That was my EXACT reaction. I was going to change it to heck to be more "appropriate" but I'll leave it as it originally popped in my head now that kenny said it.

 

[jaysonsmom]

No I am not faithful when I dream, and I wake up feeling super guilty. They odd thing is that I have dreams about doing stuff with people I'm not even attracted to, at least not consciously attracted to.

 

[Dancing Fire]

no I am not faithful when I dream...I have some pretty good dreams too

 

[kenny]

Hell no!

That was my EXACT reaction. I was going to change it to heck to be more "appropriate" but I'll leave it as it originally popped in my head now that kenny said it.

WELL! I am shocked and RuPauled!

 

[YadaYadaYada]

I am so boring lol. I am completely faithful when I dream. So far at least.

Then I guess I'm boring too! Although once I woke up from the cousin dream I was like, can't I just go back to sleep and rewrite the ending. No such luck

 

[Jambalaya]

When I was in a relationship, I noticed that the worse the relationship became in real life - which for me entailed being ignored a lot - the more romantic my dreams would be, and they were not about my partner. They used to be about someone I once knew, and then they would be about people I'd made up in my dream. But always the feelings were of deep romance, not sexual that I remember, and those dreams were directly related to how bad my real relationship was. However, sometimes I'd dream about my partner, too - good dreams when things were OK. I always thought it was odd to dream about someone lying right next to you.

So no, I'm not faithful when I dream!

 

[Gypsy]

My dreams are weird.
I don't CHEAT in my dreams in the respect that I am aware I am married and knowingly cheat. But I do dream I am in a relationship with another man. And then at some point I remember my husband and then I panic, wondering what happened to him, to us and then the dream becomes about that.

One of the most heartbreaking dreams I had is that I was dating someone else. Then I suddenly remembered DH and was frantic to reach him because he was who I wanted to be with. Finally I found his phone number, but he wouldn't answer my calls because we'd had a bad break up. I was destroyed. And then I work up and tackled him and squeezed him until he had trouble breathing.

 

[LLJsmom]

I've never dreamt about being attracted to other men, or women. I've had dreams where my DH was ignoring me and I couldn't get him to respond. And I kept telling him that couldn't ignore me, but he did. Argh!!!!

 

[missy]

I am so boring lol. I am completely faithful when I dream. So far at least.

Then I guess I'm boring too! Although once I woke up from the cousin dream I was like, can't I just go back to sleep and rewrite the ending. No such luck

Glad I'm in good company Stephanie. We can be boring together.

I've never dreamt about being attracted to other men, or women. I've had dreams where my DH was ignoring me and I couldn't get him to respond. And I kept telling him that couldn't ignore me, but he did. Argh!!!!

Um, ok, girlfriend, you know what to do when that happens right? DH ignores you in your dream? That means you can (dream of) buy(ing) big bling. That'll make him stand up and pay attention.
I promise you won't be ignored again.

 

[kenny]

... I don't CHEAT in my dreams in the respect that I am aware I am married and knowingly cheat.

Good point.
Judging dreams by waking standards is broken thinking.

 

[momhappy]

I have weird dreams too. I can't recall a specific dream about cheating, but I have dreams about other men and in my dream, I'm not married. I also have dreams about ex's, old flames, etc. I sometimes have dreams that my husband cheated

 

[ericad]

Awesome thread, lol! I totally do, not all that frequently, but it happens. I had a naughty dream about Kevin Bacon just last week, which is odd because, well, it's Kevin Bacon. And another one just last night about someone I know, so THAT'S AWKWARD lol. It's probably not a coincidence that I've had 2 in such a short time, since my husband is overseas for 6 weeks at the moment.

I tell my husband when I've dream-cheated on him and we laugh about it. If I had a dollar for every Jessica Alba or Jennifer Lawrence dream-fling my husband has had, well I wouldn't have to work for a living!

Harmless and totally out of one's control - some of us are just dirtier than others, both in our waking hours and in our sleep. Lucky for me I'm in good company, since my husband is even worse than I am, lol. But neither of us is the jealous type - we are monogamous, but definitely on the laid back end of the spectrum.

 

[lovedogs]

definitely not faithful in dreams. Not that I have tons of dreams about other men, but it definitely happens, and sometimes to people I am NOT REMOTELY attracted to in real life, so I wake up feeling icky haha. Mostly I have nightmares about abusive ex's, and find myself back together with them, but feeling as if something better is just out of reach--like something I'm trying to remember but can't quite figure it out. Very disturbing and not enjoyable at all!

 

[MishB]

Definitely not. I had 'one of those dreams' last night about my boss.

I'm often not conscious of being married in my dreams, so not deliberately cheating.

These sorts of dreams can mean a lot more than lusting after someone. For example - the boss dream. If you equate sex with power (and I guess I must), then having sex with someone in who is in a position of authority over you in real life can be an attempt to gain the upper hand, so to speak, or rebalance the power dynamic in the relationship.

 

[ckrickett]

Hell no!

OMG this made me laugh, but yes I am not faithful in my dreams. I don't think DH is either. No worries though

 

[tyty333]

Nope, not faithful in my dreams...sorry honey . Apparently I have a wondering mind!

 

[iluvshinythings]

I'm the most faithful person in real life but in my dreams I'm a total floozy. In my dreams I've been with my boss, my BIL, various co-workers, my ex, a few girlfriends and many, many strangers. I always feel extremely guilty when I wake up and have dreamed about someone I know. I don't feel as guilty about random strangers.

If I was dreaming about something I liked I tell DH, "I had this dream and we were doing x,y,z" and, always being willing to please, he eventually re-creates the scenario. I feel a tiny bit guilty about the white lie, but I think re-creating the dream with DH cleanses my
"karma palate".