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Appropriate gift for a bat mitzvah

nararabbit

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jul 17, 2010
Messages
121
Hello all,

My husband and I are looking to purchase a gift for our niece's bat mitzvah next year. We can't agree on what to get - definitely jewelry. Personally, I want to give her a the rose gold elsa peretti open heart pendant from Tiffany's. A Bat mitzvah is a big deal, and she's grown into a wonderfully sensitive, caring girl who I'm proud to call a member of my family. All the same, my husband thinks it's flashy to spend $800 on a 13 year old. (he is jewish also.) I don't like sterling silver, personally and I would like to give her something 'branded' so to speak, even though normally that's not for me. I just think there's something very special about becoming a young woman. :oops:

What do you think? Any other ideas? We're giving her this jewelry box from Pottery Barn for Chanukah next year so whatever we give her, she'll have a safe and grown-up place to keep it:

http://www.potterybarn.com/products...NoFacet-_-NoFacet-_-Sku_Top_Marketing_Rule-_-

My in-laws suggested tiny diamond earrings, but I'm not sure about that. It seems so 'normal' I guess, like the gift card of the jewelry world. We'll be making a donation to her college fund as well so no need to worry about that.
 

yennyfire

Ideal_Rock
Trade
Joined
Jun 6, 2010
Messages
6,585
I agree with your husband that $800 is a bit much to spend on a Bat Mitzvah gift for your niece (though the sentiment behind it is lovely). I think $500 is about the most I'd spend (and even that's a bit high for me). I'd get her something like this:

http://idjewelryonline.com/product_info.php?cPath=21_85&products_id=1792

If she doesn't lose it, it's a piece she could wear for quite a while and then pass onto a daughter.
 

ChloeTheGreat

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Dec 25, 2009
Messages
682
It does seem like that is a lot to spend for the occasion. Although I wish I was given something so generous for my own Bat Mitzvah!
I received a lot of money, some jewelry, and books I didn't care to read.
One of the best gifts was a silver bangle bracelet that I still wear 11 years later.
If she is interested in judaica jewelry at all, I would suggest a beautiful Chai or Star of David pendant. I have a few of both that are meaningful to me. They may or may not be everyday jewelry, but it would be a nice token to celebrate the occasion.
 

wakingdreams53

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 27, 2010
Messages
891
I got the Tiffany bean necklace (small) for my Bat Mitzvah. For a 12 year old girl, its very appropriate, very nice, and classic. Wearable with everything and priced appropriately.
I think it's sterling, but it has the Tiffany's logo on the back and came in the blue box.

I also got a Star of David bracelet which was pretty cool. But I'd suggest a necklace as it seems very "womanly"

Whiteflash has some beautiful pendants that could be very meaningful, such as the Progression or Times of Change.
http://www.whiteflash.com/diamond-pendants/search.htm
 

risingsun

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 19, 2006
Messages
5,549
I would find out if she is interested in wearing religious jewelry. If so, Arthur and Wendy Silver make some beautiful, modernistic pieces that she might like. If you would like to see my pendant, let me know. I don't have any photos yet. I could take some or try to locate their page. My daughter loves the Tiffany key I got for her. The key can be a symbolic piece, in a lower key type of way. I think the price is up to you. This is a very special occasion :appl:

This is their website. My pendant is on the last page, fourth one down on the left. I'm linking to that page, but who knows...

http://www.traditionsjewishgifts.com/arthurandwendysilver-starsofdavid-ss4.html
 

tina sparkle

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 21, 2005
Messages
171
I have given the classic "return to Tiffany" sterling bracelet for a bat mitzvah gift and it was well received. It may be appropriate if you are already contributing to her college fund. She's lucky to have an aunt like you!
 

jaysonsmom

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 13, 2004
Messages
3,479
nararabbit|1316204075|3019038 said:
Hello all,

My husband and I are looking to purchase a gift for our niece's bat mitzvah next year. We can't agree on what to get - definitely jewelry. Personally, I want to give her a the rose gold elsa peretti open heart pendant from Tiffany's. A Bat mitzvah is a big deal, and she's grown into a wonderfully sensitive, caring girl who I'm proud to call a member of my family. All the same, my husband thinks it's flashy to spend $800 on a 13 year old. (he is jewish also.) I don't like sterling silver, personally and I would like to give her something 'branded' so to speak, even though normally that's not for me. I just think there's something very special about becoming a young woman. :oops:

What do you think? Any other ideas? We're giving her this jewelry box from Pottery Barn for Chanukah next year so whatever we give her, she'll have a safe and grown-up place to keep it:

http://www.potterybarn.com/products...NoFacet-_-NoFacet-_-Sku_Top_Marketing_Rule-_-

My in-laws suggested tiny diamond earrings, but I'm not sure about that. It seems so 'normal' I guess, like the gift card of the jewelry world. We'll be making a donation to her college fund as well so no need to worry about that.

I think the open heart necklace is great for a teenager, but I would personally get it in silver because that would match all the other jewelry that most young girls wear at her age, and also because it's such a signature Tiffany piece in SILVER, that she would be the envy of all her friends!
 

SB621

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 25, 2009
Messages
7,863
jaysonsmom|1316211403|3019124 said:
nararabbit|1316204075|3019038 said:
Hello all,

My husband and I are looking to purchase a gift for our niece's bat mitzvah next year. We can't agree on what to get - definitely jewelry. Personally, I want to give her a the rose gold elsa peretti open heart pendant from Tiffany's. A Bat mitzvah is a big deal, and she's grown into a wonderfully sensitive, caring girl who I'm proud to call a member of my family. All the same, my husband thinks it's flashy to spend $800 on a 13 year old. (he is jewish also.) I don't like sterling silver, personally and I would like to give her something 'branded' so to speak, even though normally that's not for me. I just think there's something very special about becoming a young woman. :oops:

What do you think? Any other ideas? We're giving her this jewelry box from Pottery Barn for Chanukah next year so whatever we give her, she'll have a safe and grown-up place to keep it:

http://www.potterybarn.com/products...NoFacet-_-NoFacet-_-Sku_Top_Marketing_Rule-_-

My in-laws suggested tiny diamond earrings, but I'm not sure about that. It seems so 'normal' I guess, like the gift card of the jewelry world. We'll be making a donation to her college fund as well so no need to worry about that.

I think the open heart necklace is great for a teenager, but I would personally get it in silver because that would match all the other jewelry that most young girls wear at her age, and also because it's such a signature Tiffany piece in SILVER, that she would be the envy of all her friends!

I agree!! I know it is a high price tag but Tiffany's is classic so she can wear it for the next 20+ years if she chooses. My favorite Aunt got me a tiffany ring at my bat mitzvah (everyone else gave me checks which went straight to my college fund, so it was nice to have something different). I still wear it 15 years later. I say go for it, if you have the money to spend on her. Not only will she treasure it as a momento from her bat mitzvah but it will also be a special reminder of her aunt. I know I think of my aunt whenever I wear my ring.
 

Regular Guy

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 6, 2004
Messages
5,954
yaldahma|1337332230|3198235 said:
You are right, gift card of the jewelry world is nice one. You can also create your personalized glass printed photo which will include all memorable photographs in it. I have tried and was really amazing experience. Let me know what do you think?

troll



Ira Z.
 

Regular Guy

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 6, 2004
Messages
5,954
dup
 

Haven

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Feb 15, 2007
Messages
13,166
We give meaningful Jewish gifts for b'nai mitzvah, not secular gifts. Have you considered giving her something that will mark her entry into the Jewish community as an adult? I received a ya'ad, a tallit, a shofar, a tanach, my own set of siddurim, etc. These things are all very special to me because I use them in my adult Jewish life, which of course began when I became a bat mitzvah.

An $800 gift is extremely generous for a bat mitzvah gift, but I also believe that you should give whatever you feel comfortable giving. The one thing I would consider is whether your gift may appear to be one-upping other important adults in your niece's life--such as her parents or grandparents. DH and I try to be sensitive to that when deciding what to give, we would never want to give our niece the most standout gift for an event, we want that honor to belong to her parents and/or grandparents.

ETA: I love Risingsun's idea of a piece of jewelry with religious significance. That seems the best of both worlds--it's honoring what it means to become a bat mitzvah, while also sticking to your desire to give her a piece of jewelry that she can wear for a long time.
 
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