Anyone not want to upgrade?

[mr.sparkles]

There's a lot of talk on here about upgrading diamonds and I definitely don't have any problems with that.
My girlfriend said that once she's been proposed to and given a ring, she won't want to upgrade because that's the stone and ring that I''ve proposed with and I guess in a way she''ll be attached to it. My aunt was also offered an upgrade from my uncle and said she didn't want it because she likes the smaller stone now. Does anyone else feel that way? I'd like to hear people''s thoughts on this.

 

[icekid]

yeah, i''ve decided that i don''t want to upgrade later either (though right hand rings will still be fair game

). so what that means for us is that we are waiting longer, and saving more $$ before we get my e-ring. i''m figuring on 1.75-2ish ct range will be enough to keep my small size 3.5 finger happy forever. but i am going bigger mostly b/c of the people i will be around, since i will be a physician. i know everyone will have bigger rocks later when we''re making decent money, so i''ve decided that i would rather wait a bit longer now and continue to save so i won''t feel compelled to get a larger stone later. but that''s me, and to each her own!

 

[Lord Summerisle]

Mine said the same as yours.

As has both my Ma and my Ma-in-Law(To be) both are perfectly happy with their rings.. and wouldnt change them, as they hold more sentimental value than 'bling' value

While my sis talks about it... but shes a bit more materialistic*...

*and i dont mean that as a slight about anyone else who does... just my sis is a bit more a label whore than the rest of my family

 

[Reisen]

Knowing my girlfriend, I knew she would feel the same way. Sure enough, she did. With her, emotional attachments to items are worth far more than the value of the item itself. I can see both sides of the debate.

 

[eks6426]

I am not an upgrade person either. I guess the romantic in me wants to keep the original stone with which I got engaged. I also don''t want to change the setting. But I guess that''s why I was pretty picky on what got chosen. My stone is not real big...but not small either..1.20 radiant in Michael B 3 sided pave. Besides I have a long list of other diamond things I''d like!

 

[aljdewey]

I am fairly sentimental, so it was my preference not to have to upgrade. We were fortunate enough to be able to get into the stone I have now (1.25) which is more than enough for me.

If we''d have started smaller, though, I''d have been more receptive to upgrade.

I didn''t care about the "mark" or the carat weight.....I cared more about dimension on my finger. I tried on a bunch of rings and felt that I didn''t really want to be any smaller than 6.00 mm. In trying them on, I LOVED the look of 7.0mm.....but didn''t think we''d get into that.

Again, we happened to find the right blend of stone that put me into 7.00mm, and I wouldn''t change this stone. It''s my forever stone.

There are plenty of other fingers that I''d be happy making jewelry for, and I''d have no problem upgrading those. But my e-ring stone is the one my husband gave me, and that''s the one I''m keeping.

 

[Morticia]

I haven''t received my e-ring yet.

It''s 1) Being set into the Ritani Endless Love setting, and 2) My BF wants to surprise me so I have no idea when I am going to get it. He could have it now for all I know. However, I know I won''t want an upgraded e-ring in the future.

My e-ring''s center stone belonged to my BF''s grandmother so it''s sentimental to me, my BF and his mom. At one time I wished it was a bigger stone (it''s around 1 ct), but the cut, color and clarity are lovely, and with the bezel, it looks AWESOME! I just love it and can''t wait for it. His grandfather sold his car, years and years a go, to buy that stone for his grandmother so it''s very special.

So upgrade? No way. But that doesn''t mean I won''t want a nice anniversary RHR someday! Ha!

 

[Logan Sapphire]

My husband is pretty sentimental and is therefore against upgrading. I respect his feelings, and won''t pursue an upgrade. I''m less sentimental, although I think upgrading would leave me feeling slightly guilty, and what''s the point of doing something if it''s just going to make you feel badly? We have modified the setting a bit, though, so the ring isn''t *exactly* the same as the one he proposed with.

He''s open to getting an additional (larger) diamond in the future, which, depending on our financial situation, I would be thrilled with. However, if it meant choosing between my lifelong dream of a 2 week vacation to New Zealand or a larger diamond, I''d choose the trip hands down, without question. We''d only get a larger stone if it meant ALL other needs/wants were met.

 

[fire&ice]

It was enivitable. Hubby always called my e-ring my "starter" diamond. Though, admittedly, I still have emotional attachment to my ''starter'' stone.

 

[Christy42]

Never say never........I think it depends on how emotionally and financially mature you are at the time of engagement. I also think it depends on how long you''ve been married. I(we) still have an emotional attachment to my original set but I did want a bigger carat weight. Then after having been exposed to solitaires as opposed to what I had that was more diamonds less size, a vintage look, my taste and desires began to change. We still have the original set though. Won''t be trading that in...

Then after about seven years I got a carat solitaire. After about 5 years I began noticing how nice a two carat looked. Although that one wasn''t my idea. My husband bought that one. I don''t think we''ll be upgrading that one, but again, I never say never......Then I started wanting a different shape for my right hand. And here we are and I''m already planting the seed about what I want the next one to be.......Asscher, asscher, asscher.....we''ve been married almost 18 years so I still say that time changes everything...... tastes, desires, diamond shrinkage sets in, your friend gets a ring that is to die for and suddenly yours isn''t as pretty as you used to think it was or you find Pricescope.............

 

[MissAva]

I don’t know how I would feel. I am not engaged yet I can’t be 100% sure. However my parents had an odd situation when I was two my mother’s engagement ring went missing (a certain small child was accused of having flushed down the toilet...). The ring wasn’t not huge but it was what he asked her with, on her 20th anniversary she got a large RB from Tiffany’s which she likes. However I know she still wishes she had to original. I don’t think girls are necessarily being greedy if they want a bigger stone, lifestyles can change and perhaps if you don’t get a ring with a diamond in it you may want one later. If you start with a .10 ct diamond at thirty you may want a larger one, but if you start with a 2ct I think that would be a lot less likely. It also depends on the size of hands. I wear a size six and my sweet spot is 6.9-7.2mm. I would like to be in that range. Any larger and my hand looks stubby. I think it depends on the situation and the people involved, it is just as mush the husbands decision as the wife. I don’t think I would be opposed to an upgrade (maybe a little but I am really cheesy) however if BF didn’t want it or didn’t like the idea then it would never be mentioned.

 

[deny]

We will be having our 18th wedding anniversay this Monday. I just received my third upgrade a few months ago, and I love it just as much as the first ring I was given 18 years ago. It almost seems the greater our love has become over the years, the bigger my stone has become. Sorry, kind of corny but very true.

Eighteen years ago, my husband bought me a beautiful .37 e-ring. I love that ring!
Five years later, he bought me a beautiful .67 e-ring. I love that ring!
Four months ago, he bought me a beautiful 2.32 tcw three stone e-ring. I love that ring!

Each of my rings have sentimental value to me. They each represent a different phase of our years together. I would never part with any of them! I can''t sit here and say which one I love more. I love and cherish them all. So, I guess put a check on the upgrade side for me!!

 

[Christy42]

Date: 4/14/2005 11:23

8 AM
Author: denyRN
We will be having our 18th wedding anniversay this Monday. I just received my third upgrade a few months ago, and I love it just as much as the first ring I was given 18 years ago. It almost seems the greater our love has become over the years, the bigger my stone has become. Sorry, kind of corny but very true.

Eighteen years ago, my husband bought me a beautiful .37 e-ring. I love that ring!
Five years later, he bought me a beautiful .67 e-ring. I love that ring!
Four months ago, he bought me a beautiful 2.32 tcw three stone e-ring. I love that ring!

Each of my rings have sentimental value to me. They each represent a different phase of our years together. I would never part with any of them! I can''t sit here and say which one I love more. I love and cherish them all. So, I guess put a check on the upgrade side for me!!

You said it better than I did....Amen! I love all of mine too! Plus your finger gets bigger so your sweet spot gets bigger so you need a bigger rock...to cover the bigger finger.

 

[diamondlil]

My motto has always been "never say never." Truly, you can''t know today how you will feel 5, 10, or 15 years down the road. As we mature, our ideals change.

When I got engaged 20+ years ago, I really, really wanted a 1 ct stone. Unfortunately, we were building our first house at the same time and settled on about a 0.75 ct stong with the idea that I''d upgrade someday to that 1 ct. When I finally upgraded (7 years later), I ended up with a 2 ct. And although during the negotiations I felt very sentimental letting go of that 0.75 ct stone, when I saw that 2 carat mounted in my original e-ring setting, all sentimentallity flew right out the window.

At that point I was infected by the diamond bug and never looked back. I''ve since upgraded again, but not for a significantly larger size stone, just a better cut and color, and while I was at it, I changed shapes.

Since I just got a beautiful custom setting for my diamond, I''d like to think that this is the end of it, but once again I remind myself, never say never.

 

[murray93]

I have been married 9 years and am working on my upgrade right now. I'm really not at all attached to my engagement ring. It's served me well for nearly 10 years and I'm ready to move on. Styles change and so does your financial position (hopefully) so I think an upgrade was inevitable for me. And FWIW - my mom has upgraded at least 3 times and my MIL once. Maybe it's hereditary?

 

[AChiOAlumna]

I just receive my 10-year upgrade. When we got married, we didn''t have much money, but my husband was still able to afford a 1/3 carat Marquise in an unique YG setting. Since getting my upgrade (TCW 2.26 for the whole set), people immediately ask me what I plan to do with my original w-set. They wonder if I''m going to melt it down, or even sell it!!

I would never do any of these things. That w-set has a lot of sentimental value and is a demonstration of how ar we''ve come and grown as a couple. I still wear it as a RHR and even wear it as my w-set when I''m travelling to the Caribbean (don''t want to lose my new set snorkeling!! Too expensive for insurance purposes!!)...

Will I upgrade again? Who knows? But for now, I''m extremely happy and could not want anything more....of my ring or my DH!

 

[Matata]

I knows what I likes and I knows what I wants so when I finally reconditioned his attitude toward jewelry, I had my e-ring custom made -- no upgrade for me.

 

[bluedawg]

I am very sentimental and keep too many mementos, keep my kids'' baby books up to date, etc. I have been married for 10 years... and I do plan to upgrade this year. I didn''t ever think I''d want to-- esp since when DH proposed, I thought the 1 ct was HUGE-- but over the past few years I decided that I would like a bigger stone.

I never would have thought this eleven years ago when I first received the ring.

Our circumstances have changed over the past years, we can afford a bigger and better cut now, and we have three children... and I think it will be great to have a new diamond.

I plan to keep the original stone for a pendant. I think it will be nice to have more than one piece to hand down someday, too. Once I get a RHR (15th-20th anniversary, maybe?) then we will have one beautiful stone for each of our children.

 

[Catmom]

I, too, am very sentimental and keep everything. So does my husband. When we married 25 years ago we had very little money and inflation was through the roof. My husband was given his grandmothers .33 carat diamond to use for my ring. I still have it and do wear it on my rh every once in a while. I wouldn''t give that ring up for anything. However, we always talked about getting a larger diamond at some point and for my 20th anniversary we picked out the 1.61 carat princess that I currently have. We briefly thought about upgrading to a 2 carat or larger for our 25th this year. Even went so far as having our jeweler bring in several stones to look at. But I really found it hard to justify the cost when I have college age kids. What we ended up doing was just having my current stone reset into a mounting that I really like and you know what, I really like it and I don''t think that I will ever change it. But that doesn''t mean if sometime in the future he wants to get me that 2 carat RHR that I will complain!

 

[MichelleCarmen]

For a while I was considering an upgrade, but then I changed my mind. I''m too sentimental and I wouldn''t want to give up the memories attached to my rings. What I would like to do, though, is possibly purchase a second stone/ring to interchange with my current wedding set. . .this would be for fun and variety, but not as a means of replacing what I currently have

 

[LollyBear]

I don''t plan to upgrade anytime soon as I''ve only been engaged 8 months and still love the ring, but I don''t think I''d be against doing it for a milestone anniversary. My FI is the reason I wouldn''t be adverse to the idea; he told me that we should and would upgrade when he could afford more bling. I would never use my current e-ring as a trade-in though. When the time comes I will likely make my center stone into a pendant and set a gemstone in it''s place for a RHR.

 

[codex57]

Mine claims to not want an upgrade. But she certainly wouldn''t say no to a bigger rock set in something other than a ring... like a pendant or something.

 

[Mara]

It would be great to keep your original diamond and upgrade too...but I think it depends on what you 'start' with..aka if I had a .25c as an e-ring...we could probably afford to keep that and get something entirely new later for an anniversary or something. But a 1.25 or a 1.5c starter stone would be more pricey to hold onto and get a 3c upgrade too. Depends on your financial situation more.

I also think it's how long you have had the ring. aka we got engaged 2+ years ago and I have gone through 2 stones already. So I couldn't keep every one

, but if we had been married for 20 years then I'd probably have kept my original stone and gotten an entirely new one.

However, I can't wait that long!!

Hubby was sentimentally attached to the original stone but I hypnotized him out of it.

Now since we both know these stones are 'stepping stones' (tee hee), neither of us are sentimentally attached to them, though I do really think this latest 1.60 is my fave so far and not just because of the SIZE...it's an eye-popper!! I would love to be able to keep this baby for a big whopping pendant...but I doubt that will happen!

Oh I also think that for every person on here who talks about upgrading (aka me!) there are one or two others that will not consider it. So I think there's a good blend here of both types! Keeps it interesting.

 

[Nicrez]

We got a nice starter stone which I totally adore. As many women showed, their tastes changed, and so upgrades seem a popular thing. My DF mentioned that this was a starter ring, as the amount we paid for it was sizeable to us as young sibgle people with starter jobs.

In about 5 years, he promised me the stone I am really dying for, and then my tastes may change again. This is the exact reason that I don't have a permanent e-ring setting a year and a half later!

What I love is that he totally understands that I am not sentimentally attached to the diamond as much as I am attached to HIM. So as long as I keep HIM, we're Ok with an upgrade!

 

[JessesGrl]

I feel that when you "upgrade" it is a new and beautiful ring but NOT your engagement ring....that is what was given to you as a symbol of your upcoming marriage. I am very attached to my .87 carat stone ( total e-ring is about 1.3ctw.) I will NEVER upgrade this ring, it was bought w/my fiance''s life savings and is a symbol of our new and humble start ( we graduated college 6 months before I got engaged). Like someone else said....I love jewelry and maybe someday I will get an anniversary ring but it will never replace my original e-ring!!! Just my opinion!!!

 

[Jennifer5973]

I was lucky enough to keep my original diamond, which was about 80 pts,, and upgrade without a trade in. But I love my upgraded ring and don''t plan to upgrade again (despite what Dancing Fire thinks

)

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 4/14/2005 9:23:25 PM
Author: Jennifer5973
I was lucky enough to keep my original diamond, which was about 80 pts,, and upgrade without a trade in. But I love my upgraded ring and don''t plan to upgrade again (despite what Dancing Fire thinks

)

Jenn
LOL.....you will make me look like a genius in about 3 weeks.

 

[MissAva]

Ya''ll are funny....

 

[researcher]

I, for one, am someone who will NEVER upgrade my stone. It''s the diamond my SO proposed to me with, the stone that symbolizes our love. I know it''s corny, but I feel that, just as I would never trade in my guy for an upgrade I would never trade in my stone. Then again, I have the man of my dreams who gave me the diamond of my dreams!

 

[heart prongs]

No ... I wouldn''t. My now-husband and I picked out a beautiful and unique ring and I adore what I have.

I think the reason that so many women want to upgrade is because we''re relatively young when we receive our engagement rings...and let''s face it, for many of us, this is the most exciting and expensive jewelry experience we''ll ever have in our lives!

And then it''s over!

Sure, I might get other great jewelry as the years go by, but nothing will be as special as my engagement ring...And nobody is going to congratulate and hug me when they see it, ooh and ahh over it, or ask me what he said when he gave it to me!!! The thing is, I''m never going to be as excited about a piece of jewelry as I was and still am over my e-ring!!!

I''m kidding a bit...but I think there should be a mandatory re-proposal at 10 years when all women have another chance to get not an upgrade, but another gorgeous ring for another finger along with a fabulous speech on bended knee in which he tells you how wonderful his life has been with you!!!

And then of course, you get another HM...hey, a gal can dream...right?

klr