mia1181
Brilliant_Rock
- Joined
- Oct 25, 2006
- Messages
- 1,789
I have niece on DH''s side who I am very close to. I babysat her from the time she was 8 or 9 months old and she is now 8 years old. We''ve always had a special bond. At family functions she would always reserve seats next to me and only want to spend time with me. When she was 5, I moved across the country and thought the relationship would taper off because she isn''t good on the phone and would probably move on to other things in her life (I remember being annoyed as a child when relatives would come to visit and tell me how close we were, when I didn''t even remember them!). Anyway each time I go home she is still very excited to see me and spend time with me. It really is wonderful!
Well now that she is getting older she is becoming more emotional about goodbyes and I feel so awful. This is what happened the last time I visited. I spent my last day in town with her, her brother and mother. She''s very good with dates and knew it was my last day (everytime I go she recites to people the exact date/time I will be coming/leaving). Anyway I said goodbye and she hugged/kissed me and went on doing what she was doing and I got in my car an left. I made it 3 blocks down the road when my cellphone starting ringing, and it was her house. I answered, but could only here her crying and couldn''t make out what she was saying. So I hung up, turned around and ran into her house. There she was just bawling on her mother that she didn''t want me to leave. I had no idea she would be so sad. I hugged her for a while and explained that I''ll be back soon enough and she''ll be fine. By that time we were all crying, her mother, brother and I were all just crying with her. She calmed down so I said goodbye again and left, and her mother suggested they go outside and wave as I drove off. As I started to pull away she ran after the car screaming and crying, and that was the last time I saw her. It was so surreal, like a scene from a movie and I had no idea she was so emotional. She is a normal kid, has lots of friends and a happy childhood. And I know once I''m gone she is fine and is like "Aunt Janis, who?" But it is so hard to leave.
Anyway, I am going to see her again this week and I wondered if anyone had any suggestions for how to make goodbye''s easier. I know this time I will start a count down to when I have to leave so it isn''t as sudden as last time. But any other advice? I know from my nannying experience sometimes it''s better to just leave then linger and prolong the inevitable (like when mommy leaves for work). But is there anything I can do or say to help her get over it sooner? Last time she emailed me several times a day for a few weeks about how much she misses me. I''d much rather her get over it and go back to her life. I feel really bad for popping in and out of her life.
Well now that she is getting older she is becoming more emotional about goodbyes and I feel so awful. This is what happened the last time I visited. I spent my last day in town with her, her brother and mother. She''s very good with dates and knew it was my last day (everytime I go she recites to people the exact date/time I will be coming/leaving). Anyway I said goodbye and she hugged/kissed me and went on doing what she was doing and I got in my car an left. I made it 3 blocks down the road when my cellphone starting ringing, and it was her house. I answered, but could only here her crying and couldn''t make out what she was saying. So I hung up, turned around and ran into her house. There she was just bawling on her mother that she didn''t want me to leave. I had no idea she would be so sad. I hugged her for a while and explained that I''ll be back soon enough and she''ll be fine. By that time we were all crying, her mother, brother and I were all just crying with her. She calmed down so I said goodbye again and left, and her mother suggested they go outside and wave as I drove off. As I started to pull away she ran after the car screaming and crying, and that was the last time I saw her. It was so surreal, like a scene from a movie and I had no idea she was so emotional. She is a normal kid, has lots of friends and a happy childhood. And I know once I''m gone she is fine and is like "Aunt Janis, who?" But it is so hard to leave.
Anyway, I am going to see her again this week and I wondered if anyone had any suggestions for how to make goodbye''s easier. I know this time I will start a count down to when I have to leave so it isn''t as sudden as last time. But any other advice? I know from my nannying experience sometimes it''s better to just leave then linger and prolong the inevitable (like when mommy leaves for work). But is there anything I can do or say to help her get over it sooner? Last time she emailed me several times a day for a few weeks about how much she misses me. I''d much rather her get over it and go back to her life. I feel really bad for popping in and out of her life.
300x240.png)