Any regrets over e-ring diamond selection?

[CharmyPoo]

I was wondering if anyone have regrets over their e-ring diamond selection.

I have this nagging feeling that something is just not right. I was a PS member when we purchased our diamond but I must admit I didn''t know much - I just knew which vendor to go to. I thought I wanted a cushion that sparkled like a round brillant. I quickly knew I liked the 8 pavillion main diamond shown to me over the 4 pavillion main. At that time, I have never seen a chunky cushion in real life and thought I wouldn''t like it because it doesn''t sparkle like a rb. Since then, I have seen chunky cushions in real life and love them. Part of me wishes that we got a chunky cushion instead but it is a little too late. Our setting is about to get started and the diamond is all paid for.

The diamond is beautiful and I haven''t seen it in a long time. There is a probability that I will probably love it when I see it again. The other half wonders if I should try to do something about it before the setting is done. My boyfriend is pretty upset when I mentioned this because he put a lot of effort in selecting the diamond. All things are set in motion.

What would you do? Are these feelings normal - perhaps I am just nervous?

 

[Tolive]

Hm... tough position to be in, and the feeling is true.
I say go with the feeling and whatever your heart tells you to, cuz you''ll be the one looking at the ring for the rest of your life (assuming no upgrades/changes) and whether or not the smile or regret feeling there, that''s the question...
Good luck!

 

[swingirl]

If the stone hasn''t been set yet it''s not too late. Does your vendor have an upgrade policy? Check it out and see it you can find something you like more. You might want to compare several stones in person. You may decide you like what you already have.

 

[beach]

You said you knew which vendor to go to.....so does the vendor have an upgrade policy. If so, they could source your another with very similar dimensions so the change does not affect your setting. You say it is bothering you so change it now whille you can IMO.

 

[beach]

Lol swingirl... you beat me by about 20 seconds with your similar response

 

[bgray]

no i dont think its "normal" for you to feel this way. second thoughts are second thoughts. can you refresh my memory as to your stone and setting?

 

[jess1981]

I had the same problem I recently upgraded to a halo I thought I loved the look at first, but quiclkly regreted my decision. I missed my more simple solitare. I told my FI and he was upset because he put so much into the upgrade that I wanted.

I ended up just going with my gut and returning my ring for a loose diamond that I put into a more simple setting like my first ering. My fiance is now very happy with the result and agrees that I made the right decision.

I know it is an awful feeling and it is such an important decision. I think go with your gut and your FI will come around. Call the vendor and find out what your options are befor you worry too much.

 

[CharmyPoo]

We went with Mark at ERD. We are passed the return policy but he offers a buy back at 70% or trade up if the new diamond is 30% more in value. The buy back option doesn't sit well since we will lose 30% for nothing. I am not sure if the trade up of 30% will work - financially, we can pull it off but I don't want to go bigger in size and I am comfortable with the color and clarity.

Edit to add...
I just talked to my boyfriend and I am just going to wait it out and stop thinking too much. The setting has been in the works for two weeks and the design is rather intricate and made to fit the current stone measurements. He said he can finish it and then sell it and start over. But I think we will just lose too much money. I will be happy - it is a very beautiful cushion and it is some what chunky but not very chunky. Plus, I can always upgrade a couple years down the road.

 

[neatfreak]

Honestly, I think it''s totally normal to have second thoughts about such a large purchase. I know I did and many others here have too.

 

[bgray]

Date: 11/16/2008 10:12:08 PM
Author: CharmyPoo
We went with Mark at ERD. We are passed the return policy but he offers a buy back at 70% or trade up if the new diamond is 30% more in value. The buy back option doesn''t sit well since we will lose 30% for nothing. I am not sure if the trade up of 30% will work - financially, we can pull it off but I don''t want to go bigger in size and I am comfortable with the color and clarity.

what worries you--the stone itself or that you dont know how to set it?

 

[bgray]

give it a chance...........i was going to suggest a simply setting so you didnt have too much invested in the setting in the event you wanted to trade up later

 

[CharmyPoo]

I added another pargraph to my second post above - I guess it is the decision I am going with and no turning back for now.

Bgray - The only thing that is making me think is that I like a chunkier look than what I have. The stone is beautiful (Maytal Hannah and David Wolfe both mentioned it). It has a bit of an antique look from the top but has the brillance of a RB because of the way it is cut on the bottom. It is a 1.52/G/VS1 that is very pillowy. I don''t mind going up to a F but the G doesn''t bother me. The size is a little bigger than what I was looking for. My fingers are a little bit smaller than a 3 and I didn''t want something too flashy.

I know I started the other thread for T&CO setting I love. That will be a RHR since my boyfriend loves the cushion cut and finds a RB too boring. I am sure the setting he designed will be beautiful. There is a sentimental value to it since it is based off the first e-ring we tried on and one of the only designs we both love.

 

[CharmyPoo]

Date: 11/16/2008 10:22:20 PM
Author: bgray
give it a chance...........i was going to suggest a simply setting so you didnt have too much invested in the setting in the event you wanted to trade up later

Too late for that. It is already all paid for and in the works.

 

[bgray]

Date: 11/16/2008 10:27:23 PM
Author: CharmyPoo
I added another pargraph to my second post above - I guess it is the decision I am going with and no turning back for now.

Bgray - The only thing that is making me think is that I like a chunkier look than what I have. The stone is beautiful (Maytal Hannah and David Wolfe both mentioned it). It has a bit of an antique look from the top but has the brillance of a RB because of the way it is cut on the bottom. It is a 1.52/G/VS1 that is very pillowy. I don''t mind going up to a F but the G doesn''t bother me. The size is a little bigger than what I was looking for. My fingers are a little bit smaller than a 3 and I didn''t want something too flashy.

I know I started the other thread for T&CO setting I love. That will be a RHR since my boyfriend loves the cushion cut and finds a RB too boring. I am sure the setting he designed will be beautiful. There is a sentimental value to it since it is based off the first e-ring we tried on and one of the only designs we both love.

i think you are just second guessing yourself unnecessarily. what is the mounting deisgn?

 

[marcy]

I think it''s natural to worry about if it''s what you want especially when it is a big purchase and you don''t have it there to look at. I hope it turns out to be something you love.

 

[Kelli]

I regretted mine big time, because I picked it out right before I found pricescope. I couldn''t let it go and wound up having it recut. NOW, I''m THRILLED with it, but I never would have been happy knowing the cut wasn''t very good.

Your situation is different though. The cut of round brilliants is pretty cut and dry. My understanding of cushions is that this is not the case, that you really have to look at each stone individually. If you loved your stone when you saw it before, you may very likely love it again. Is there any way you can see it IRL again to be sure?

 

[Deelight]

Date: 11/16/2008 10:14:16 PM
Author: neatfreak
Honestly, I think it''s totally normal to have second thoughts about such a large purchase. I know I did and many others here have too.

So normal, between the time we picked the diamond and had the setting, appraisal, picked it up and he proposed that was about ohhh 6-7mths easy so lots of time to mull over it and wonder if we did the right thing. He was steadfast in the choice and I was worried that because we went a higher colour and clarity rather then going a substantial amount bigger if that was such a bright idea.

Fast forward to the proposal he pops the question slips on the ring and every bad thought flew out and all I could do was sit in wonder and awe of my new pretty.

 

[HeartingDiamonds]

Hi Charmypoo,

I think its natural (for some anyway) that people second guess themselves and even have buyer's remorse. I also get these thoughts right before, or at the conclusion of a major purchase. I cant seem to stop the "what-if" thoughts! What is a cheaper house comes on the market? What if the purse I'm buying is put on sale after a month? What if I buy this expensive XYZ now and find something else I like better in the meantime?

Did you do a lot of shopping and looking at stones before your purchase? I ask because if you have, and you liked your diamond when you first saw it, chances are you will like it just as much, if not more, when you see it set in a ring.

I suggest to let these thoughts go for now and wait for the ring to be finished! It it comes back and you are still NOT 200% in love with it, then there is the upgrade to look forward to

.

Hope this helps?

 

[CharmyPoo]

I did second guess myself after I purchased my home and kept looking around. LOL.

I was not heavily involved in this diamond purchase as we couldn't deciede if I should be involved or not. However, on the final day - he took me to review his first selection (he wasn't really happy with it) plus a couple more options. I actually said no to all of them and another diamond was found - the one we now have. All in all - I only looked at it for 5 minutes. I left it up to my boyfriend to make the decision. To be honest, I actually wanted to keep looking but there was some pressure to buy something since we had a deposit on another diamond for 3 months.

Anyways, not going to dwell on this any longer. I will be happy on that day

 

[jerichosmom]

Charmypoo, I feel your agony. I was so in love with the 2 cushions that GOG had and once I had them in my hand, I had a total change of heart. Despite pining for a chunky cushion for years, I''m now looking at an OEC or OMC. Luckily, I was able to return the stones and my financial loss was minimal. I''ve now found my dream ring but am going to wait another month or two before purchasing in case I change my mind again. I''m sure this doesn''t play out well with the vendors who helped me with my cushion search, especially GOG.

If I was in your situation, I would wait until the ring was done as I think that you will love it once you see it. You fell in love with the stone once before and I''m sure that once you see it again, you will love it even more in it''s setting. If in time you still feel that a chunky cushion is calling your name then I think you will be in a better position to make that change financially & emotionally. It''s not the end of the world if this cushion is not the "30 year stone". It rarely is and that is why there are upgrade policies in place. Plus, I personally think that diamond prices are going to slide a little (but that''s just based on my shopping experience in LA).

Try not to second guess yourself. It''s just a ring and it can be replaced. Disclaimer: I''m going through the "it''s just a material item" mode as I''m in LA where there are thousands of people who have just lost their homes & everything that they own in the terrible fires yesterday. I''ve just finished rounding up clothing & household items to donate to my neighbours so I''m feeling rather reflective right now. What''s really important is that you have the love of a good man who will support your diamond purchasing decisions regardless of how many times you flip flop.

I look forward to seeing the finished product...(hopefully before i make my purchase in case I change my mind again!).

 

[AprilBaby]

Maybe you just miss your stone and you will be THRILLED when it comes back cause you had forgotten how beautiful it was!

 

[girlie-girl]

I think looking at everyone''s gorgeous rings/diamonds here on PS just helps fuel the fire of doubt. So, it could just be due to the fact that you''re on here and constantly looking at stuff other than what you picked out for yourself.

I really hope once you get your completed ring you''ll feel differently towards your diamond. I can imagine your BF would be upset if he put a lot of work into it.

Keep us posted!

 

[slmulkey]

I totally understand. I regret not going higher in color (mine is an "I"), but overall I''m happy with the purchase, and its not significant enough for me to really regret buying it. I think its kind of like a house, you don''t really know what you want until you live in one.

 

[goobear78]

Charmypoo - I completely understand. As you know, I also purchased my stone from ERD and at the time, I thought I knew a lot about cushions. I knew I wanted 8 pav, that I didn''t want a modified cushion brilliant and that I wanted it to be square. Turns out there was some stuff I still didn''t know. I didn''t realize the whole chunky vs. brilliant factor of cushions and I wish I did know that before making my decision.

That said, I love my stone, it sung to me when I saw it. I know you will love yours too. Your setting sounds lovely and I think it is very natural to second guess big important purchases. I did with mine. I thought about returning it right up to the 30 day mark.

Now some day I hope to upgrade or just get a really chunky cushion in addition to the one I have now. So think of that option, you can always have two great stones!

 

[Maisie]

I have had no regrets about my diamond but I have had regrets over my setting. But we live and learn. I am going to live with mine because it cost a lot of money and is pretty. Just not exactly how I imagined it would look.

 

[Miss Fortune]

ummmmmm.... are you reading my mind!?!?!? I just came over here to start a thread about ring regrets! I regret SO much. I was not a PS member when I picked out my ring and boy will I be paying for it.

Where to start...

Well, my ring is GIA (no regrets there) but is D color. I wish I would have gone down to a F or G in order to get a bigger stone. Also, my stone has med blue fluro and is not good with a D stone. Also, we paid too much. My stone is a 1.2 and I would love to have a 2.2 working on this now. Trying to upgrade but no one really likes the fluro in my diamond. I might have to save up for another year in order to get the ring I really want. I just don''t want to be ungrateful especially because my dear husband spent 12K total on the ring which is a lot more than most people so I try to keep my unhappiness in check but it''s hard! My side stones don''t have fluro and it really bugs me. I just wish I had gotten a 2.2 asscher solitaire!!!

Live and learn right???

Your ring sounds lovely by the way... I bet you feel different about it once it''s set. Hope so! GL!

 

[panda08]

It's natural to second guess such a significant purchase but you may end up loving your ring and forgetting about this conversation! I had the EXACT same feelings after we pulled the trigger on my diamond and was CONSTANTLY surfing around looking at other diamonds when I was sitting around waiting for my diamond to be set. I love my cushion, it's what I wanted but I confess, I occasionally look at other diamonds even though I won't be upgrading anytime in the near future (and probably never will, according to my FI). I totally agree with Girlie-Girl... looking at all the great rings on PS has a way of making one think they want something else.

Can't wait to see your ring! I'm sure it'll be gorgeous!

 

[edl]

Having doubts about your purchase isn't unusual, but I'd focus on the big picture...

I'm sure your ring will be great with the stone you selected, and if you still want a chunky cushion you can always buy one down the road.