Any graduate students/S.O.''s of grad students here?

[leonidas]

I want to talk about financing...and from my limited time here, I know it''s a touchy subject. Here''s my situation - I am currently a graduate student with a limited financial aid package, but I would like to get engaged sometime this summer. Given my current finances and my summer position, I could certainly pay off the cost of a ring by July at the very latest. However, I don''t want to wait that long - this engagement has been a LONG time coming and we''re both getting a little excited (ok, anxious). I don''t know exactly how/when I want to pop the question, but I want a ring in my possession sometime soon so I at least have the opportunity.

It seems like the best way to pay for a diamond is by wire transfer. If I had the money on hand, I''d do that in a heartbeat, but right now I just don''t. Would I be crazy to put it on my credit card for a month or two? It would put me over my credit limit and I''m pretty sure I''d have to pay a $39 fee, but the 1% cash back I get would more than make up for that.

Anyone out there been in my position? Even if you haven''t, I''d really appreciate your thoughts. I''m sure I''ve left out some important details, so feel free to ask.

 

[oobiecoo]

Alot of jewelers offer a couple of "jewelers cards". FI used one for mine... they gave him 6 months interest free. I''d recommend that if you need to finance. Whats style and budget are you dealing with? Maybe we can find you a deal!

 

[EmeraldCutQuest]

My philosphy is: if you don''t have the cash to pay for something outright (perhaps with the exception of a house/car/college), then you can''t afford it!

Wait until you can afford to pay cash for a diamond/ring, or buy something smaller if you want it sooner. You can always upgrade later (I am in the process of doing exactly that ... 25 years later!!!). Being a newly-wed, you''ll have tons of expenses -- don''t start this journey by being over your head in debt, and all the stress that that will entail.

--ECQ (no longer).

 

[leonidas]

oobiecoo, I'm always up for advice. I'm looking for a RB in the $9,000 range (diamond + ring, give or take). I'm almost certainly going to be buying the diamond online and am hoping to buy the ring at a B&M. (a little background: https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/no-more-lurking-just-want-to-say-hi-and-thanks.82346/)

Do any of the online jewelers raved about on here (WF/GOG) offer such financing?



ECQ, I totally hear you. I am an extremely cost-conscious person and even using the word "financing" scares me. But a) I know (barring some extreme unforeseen circumstance) I can pay this off within a few months and b) I really want to ask her to marry me sometime this summer.

I know it's not 100% necessary to do it in this timeframe, but I'd REALLY like to. I guess I could wait until later in the summer to purchase the ring, but who knows...I might want to pop the question in June or so...

Maybe I should just go with something smaller for now...it's just that I know I will have a decent income soon after and I don't want to regret not buying something in my range (1.20/I/VS1ish)...

I dunno...what do you all think?

 

[FrekeChild]

Eh...I have a grad student SO and I don't want to add a ring on top of his student loans. With that said, I don't even want a diamond for my ering (blue topaz all the way!) and it's super cheap (not intentional, I just really love the stone). So my ering will cost under $500 with a pretty awesome stone, and pretty much everything I want in it. Now luckily for him and his student loans ($30,000+) he can manage that easily-PAYING CASH.

I can't emphasize this enough, you DON'T want to owe on a ring. I have a friend who financed a ring, proposed and then a few months later got dumped. So now, he's still left with the ring payments, and also has a worthless ring because he can't use it with another girl (I'd kick his booty) and he can't sell it for near what he paid for it. I'm not saying that that will happen to you, but there are plenty of other nasty situations that can arise from not paying for it outright.

This is what I suggest. If you can afford this ring by fall, buy it then. In the meantime, buy her a pretty gemstone ring/eternity band/plain band as a placeholder and use that to propose with. If BF really wanted to get me something nice that he couldn't afford yet, but could in the near future, that's what I'd want him to do. I mean, I'd get an extra piece of jewelry out of it-you know?

So, I'd say, start saving all of the cash you can, buy her a pretty bauble (BF just got me a Elsa Peretti ring for my bday from Tiffany and I LOVE IT. It's the Tsavorite ring like the link I put up.) perhaps like this: Linky and tell her she'll have to wait until you can afford what you really want to give her for a few more months. Tada! You'll be engaged and you won't be starting off your engagement in debt.

(And she'd still be getting a beautiful diamond ring-Tiffany no less!)

That's what I'd do.

(And as a side note when BF does propose, I plan on wearing the ring he just got me in place of the ering most of the time because blue topaz is too fragile to wear on a daily basis.)

ETA: that ring I put the link of is $265 because it's a diamond, but the gemstone ones are generally $215 if she has a favorite color (emerald, tsavorite, pink sapphire, blue sapphire and then the diamond)

 

[Rhea]

The recommended jewellers on here don''t have their own financing. None of them are chains and being such small stores it wouldn''t be in their interest.

$9K is a lot of money. You said that you could pay it off by this summer, right? Why not either search for something in your current price range for both the stone and setting, or get the stone you like, put it in a simple setting and upgrade the setting when July comes and you have the money?

 

[oobiecoo]

I''m not sure if anyone mentioned on here offers that type of financing. Our B&M did but it''s in Texas and I don''t know where you are located. I second Freke''s idea of proposing with a really awesome eternity band. I sometimes wish we had gone that route... my ring is beautiful though and I love it so I''m not trying to be ungrateful.


Something like this:
http://www.signedpieces.com/item.cfm?item_id=2282

Or this:
http://www.signedpieces.com/item.cfm?item_id=2552

Or downgrade in size but get a TIFFANY!
http://www.signedpieces.com/item.cfm?item_id=7789

Or Tiffany band:
http://www.signedpieces.com/item.cfm?item_id=4942


Or if you want to just downsize a bit then maybe this diamond
http://www.whiteflash.com/round_ideal_cut/Round-Ideal-Cut-cut-diamond-358388.htm

(I''m not an expert on cut but whiteflash gives it 4 stars so I assume its beautiful!)

 

[gwendolyn]

Hello!!

First of all, I just wanted to say that I think it's very sweet that you both are antsy and want to get engaged very soon. Although right now it may feel like July is a long time away, it's really not, in the scheme of things. As a grad student myself who has a 20,000-word paper due July 14th, trust me! July's really NOT that far away at all!

Anyway, I don't think you should buy the ring now. Nine grand is a lot of money, and speaking as someone with a mountain of student loans, I don't think you want to add to that by maxing out your credit card just for instant gratification. If the budget it negotiable and it's really *that* important to you to be engaged two months sooner than you'd originally thought, then sure, I'd say go for it. But as it stands, I think you should shop around, get a good idea of what you're looking for (if you haven't already), and come back to make the purchase when you're most financially able. You're really only talking about a couple of months waiting, which I think is preferable since going into debt for it now could have long-term repercussions.

Do you know what setting she wants?

 

[dageman]

Im currently a grad student and I purchased a ring on my line of credit (lower interest than a credit card at least) and plan to pay off within a year or so. I dont really have any other student debt though since I am lucky enough to have an RESP from my father who passed away that covers most of my school tuition.

I really wanted to get engaged this summer and I (since I have the ring) am planning on doing it!

Best financial decision, maybe not. But being a future dentist I figured 1) Barring any crazy circumstances I''ll be able to make it back and 2) I''m going to be living most of the years of my upcoming life in massive debt for a house, practice etc... so whats an extra few thousand right? I should also note that my FF is already working and making pretty good money as a dental hygenist and she will be covering all the living expenses once we move in together. So I guess thats another factor that may be different in your situation.

Like I said maybe a bad idea, but you only live once right. I''m gonna go against the grain here and say go for it. Especially since you will be paying it off this summer!

Have fun

 

[erica k]

i''m a grad student, as is my husband. and yes, he did put our little 1/2ct wg solitaire on his credit card. i make more money than him (teaching and research assistant work), so i helped him pay it off pretty quickly. that said, we are certainly not role models for financial responsibility.

anyway, $9000 is a pretty big budget for a grad student, even someone who will be able to pay it all off in july. sure, one can budget for that amount, but you never know about unexpected expenses that might defer payment in full. i''ve learned my lesson the hard way. if i can''t pay for my credit purchases at the end of the month, i shouldn''t buy it. all these little purchases add up to a huge headache.

so, what exactly can you afford right now? or in the next month? what about $6704 for a 1.25ct I-SI1 (looks like it might be eye-clean to me) from WF?
http://www.whiteflash.com/round_ideal_cut/Round-Ideal-Cut-cut-diamond-680224.htm#

or how about a 1.023 ct I SI1 for $4650 posted by oobiecoo? WF and GOG, among others, have liberal upgrade policies. some people like to propose with a ring. so why not get a pretty stone for nearly half your intended budget, and then upgrade before the wedding? anyway, a 1ct isn''t anything to sneeze at! (what ring size is your gf? a 1ct looks pretty decent on my short stubby size 5.5-6 finger)

i''m not very good with math, so financing and playing with numbers sounds too tricky for me. that''s why we went with boring old credit cards. my husband used a credit card with 0% APR for 6 months, and we were able to pay off nearly all of it in that time frame. again, not necessarily the best way to go about things, but it worked out ok in the end.

the only thing i regret is that i''d love a larger stone, but we can''t upgrade the original stone. wish we had known about PS earlier! this time we''re saving up and making sure we can really afford a new ring.

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

Generous budget; but would you consider starting with something smaller in a ring, but buying with a company with a great upgrade policy and increasing the size when you are more settled financially? Sometimes, less is more, KWIM?

cheers--Sharon

 

[Fly Girl]

We were college students when we got engaged. A lot of our friends got engaged without a ring (you don''t need one to get married...really!!!), but I wanted a diamond ring. It was very small, but it was what we could afford. $9,000 is a lot of money for a ring. Either spend less now for a ring, or get engaged without one and buy it in July when you have the money. If you are trying to figure out how to finance it, you are spending too much.

 

[JSM]

Grad student here. My fiance isn''t a grad student, but he has a modest salary and had a budget of about a third of yours! He bought at a chain jeweler and did the one year no-interest deal, and paid for my ring in full over that time.

You have a great budget but DON''T use financial aid for a ring purchase if you can avoid it. I was upset about my ring size for a LONG time but honestly, my ring is paid for and now we can focus on saving for other things that are more important - student loans, vehicles, moving expenses after I graduate, and maybe even a home.

And don''t even think about going over your credit limit!! That could raise your interest rates for years and wind up costing you a lot more money and hassle in the end.

July will be here before you know it, I promise. Good luck.

 

[kelpie]

I would propose with a nice wedding band-ish/eternity ring then ask her to pick the engagement looking ring she likes as her wedding ring. You''ll get the rings you want, just out of order. I would really avoid financing the ring, it defeats the whole traditional purpose of the ring, which was a gift almost like a dowry. The practice of giving a ring is supposed to show you are financially (and emotionally!)prepared to start your household together.

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 4/27/2008 11:18:46 AM
Author: canuk-gal
HI:


Generous budget; but would you consider starting with something smaller in a ring, but buying with a company with a great upgrade policy and increasing the size when you are more settled financially? Sometimes, less is more, KWIM?


cheers--Sharon

Agreed. $9000 seems like a crazy budget for someone who doesn't make a lot of $ AND would make put it over your credit limit to buy!!! There are other ramifications for going over your credit limit other than the $39 fee, so you might want to do some more research on that before you do it.

Why are you intent on spending so much? My DH and I are graduate students, but DH is in computers/math and so actually makes a decent living, plus we both have full fellowships and decent stipends. We only spent about $4500 on my ring, and that was ONLY because DH had a very sweet summer internship every summer that paid so much that $4500 wasn't even a months salary.

BUT had we not been in that position there is NO WAY I would have had my DH spend even $4500 on a ring. It's just crazy right now. Start small and build up when you can.

 

[erica k]

Date: 4/27/2008 12:03:53 PM
Author: neatfreak

Date: 4/27/2008 11:18:46 AM

Author: canuk-gal

HI:



Generous budget; but would you consider starting with something smaller in a ring, but buying with a company with a great upgrade policy and increasing the size when you are more settled financially? Sometimes, less is more, KWIM?



cheers--Sharon

Agreed. $9000 seems like a crazy budget for someone who doesn''t make a lot of $ AND would make put it over your credit limit to buy!!! There are other ramifications for going over your credit limit other than the $39 fee, so you might want to do some more research on that before you do it.


Why are you intent on spending so much? My DH and I are graduate students, but DH is in computers/math and so actually makes a decent living, plus we both have full fellowships and decent stipends. We only spent about $4500 on my ring, and that was ONLY because DH had a very sweet summer internship every summer that paid so much that $4500 wasn''t even a months salary.


BUT had we not been in that position there is NO WAY I would have had my DH spend even $4500 on a ring. It''s just crazy right now. Start small and build up when you can.

oh yeah, and i forgot to say, going over your credit limit is a really bad idea! it''ll likely impact your credit score (and apr) significantly. a $39 fee is only the tip of the proverbial iceberg....now is not the time to mess around with your credit...

 

[ImpatientOne]

Here you go: http://www.pearlmansjewelers.com/information/jewelry-financing/ Pearlmans is a highly repsected vendor here. Bill Pearlman is an awesome guy and very easy to deal with!!!

 

[leonidas]

Wow, thanks for all the really helpful replies. I feel kinda silly throwing out the $9K number now...I''m certainly not set on spending that much. In fact, if it wasn''t for a recent trip to a jewelry store, that price range wouldn''t even be a thought. What got me was the Michael B Princess collection...I loved what I saw and my price range instantly shot up because of that ring. [sidenote: I haven''t really looked into getting a custom ring done, but the store did mention that they can do a "custom Michael B". I wish I had asked about pricing...anybody have any idea how much cheaper it would be to have a store do a custom ring (micropave, one-sided, 70%)?]

As for the diamond, well, 1.2ct would be nice, but I would definitely have to tone it down if I went for an actual Michael B ring. I don''t know if this will sound weird, but I''m not a huge fan of the idea of upgrading a ring. I dunno...ideally, I just want the first ring to be THE ring. I certainly don''t mean to knock anyone here, and truly, I am already warming up to the idea of buying small and upgrading later - or as many of you suggested, proposing with a different (cheaper) ring altogether.

Anyway, I''m really glad I posted on here - I''ve thrown out the idea of financing...I''m going to save until I can pay cash, then get something within my current means - not what I think my means will be a year from now. I also shouldn''t rush to buy the ring. After 5+ years of dating, waiting an extra month or two shouldn''t be a big deal.


BTW, I hadn''t looked into the ramifications of going over my credit limit. That was just a thought that popped into my head. I would definitely have researched it inside and out before doing something so drastic, but you''ve sufficiently talked me out of even considering that idea!

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 4/27/2008 3:04:48 PM
Author: leonidas
Wow, thanks for all the really helpful replies. I feel kinda silly throwing out the $9K number now...I''m certainly not set on spending that much. In fact, if it wasn''t for a recent trip to a jewelry store, that price range wouldn''t even be a thought. What got me was the Michael B Princess collection...I loved what I saw and my price range instantly shot up because of that ring. [sidenote: I haven''t really looked into getting a custom ring done, but the store did mention that they can do a ''custom Michael B''. I wish I had asked about pricing...anybody have any idea how much cheaper it would be to have a store do a custom ring (micropave, one-sided, 70%)?]


As for the diamond, well, 1.2ct would be nice, but I would definitely have to tone it down if I went for an actual Michael B ring. I don''t know if this will sound weird, but I''m not a huge fan of the idea of upgrading a ring. I dunno...ideally, I just want the first ring to be THE ring. I certainly don''t mean to knock anyone here, and truly, I am already warming up to the idea of buying small and upgrading later - or as many of you suggested, proposing with a different (cheaper) ring altogether.


Anyway, I''m really glad I posted on here - I''ve thrown out the idea of financing...I''m going to save until I can pay cash, then get something within my current means - not what I think my means will be a year from now. I also shouldn''t rush to buy the ring. After 5+ years of dating, waiting an extra month or two shouldn''t be a big deal.



BTW, I hadn''t looked into the ramifications of going over my credit limit. That was just a thought that popped into my head. I would definitely have researched it inside and out before doing something so drastic, but you''ve sufficiently talked me out of even considering that idea!

This sounds like a great plan. 2 more months won''t be a big deal and any girl worth marrying would NEVER ask her graduate student hubby to be to spend $9000 on a ring IMO. It''s just too much for this time in our lives. Even if you don''t like the idea of "upgrading" you can always buy her a really nice anniversary ring down the road when you can afford it.

 

[leonidas]

Date: 4/27/2008 3:19:43 PM
Author: neatfreak
Even if you don''t like the idea of ''upgrading'' you can always buy her a really nice anniversary ring down the road when you can afford it.

Actually, the more I think about it, the more upgrading seems like a good way to go. I probably would want to wait until a big anniversary sometime further down the road to do it (5 years?).

 

[gwendolyn]

Date: 4/27/2008 3:04:48 PM
Author: leonidas
Anyway, I''m really glad I posted on here - I''ve thrown out the idea of financing...I''m going to save until I can pay cash, then get something within my current means - not what I think my means will be a year from now. I also shouldn''t rush to buy the ring. After 5+ years of dating, waiting an extra month or two shouldn''t be a big deal.

Smart decision!

Please keep us updated on your search and let us know if you want any help shopping!