Already burnt out on Weddings, and not even engaged..

[cRaSh]

We had a new girl start a couple weeks ago. She is engaged to be married in June. She's experiencing everything for the first time. She's never lived on her own, just got a new car, etc. I'm a veteran to all this. "Been there, done that", as the old saying goes, but I'm only two years older (feel more like 20 years older). I've been on my own since I was 16. Then married at 23, house, new car, starting over again, etc.

I'm so sick to death of hearing about the wedding, the house, the new cars. Which caterer? Which church? You should see this home... etc. I try to be curteous, and listen, but for 8 hours on end a day, I just can't take it anymore!!! I know when I got married, I was probably the same, it was new to me, and exciting, and I'm sure I drove people nuts. But since I been through it, I guess it doesn't seem like such a big deal.

I'm so tired of it, that I'm not even excited about the prospect of getting married again.

I guess it brings bad memories for me because my first marriage was a disaster. The wedding was a disaster, the marriage, the new home. It brings stress for me to hear about this stuff, rather than happiness. I had already decided not to have another wedding. But until now I was pretty excited about the idea of my b/f and I getting married. Now the idea makes me cringe.

Reality check? Envy? Bad memories clouding good thoughts?

Help me be happy again. I came here to alieve my anxiety. Now I want to feel it again!!!

 

[MustangFan]

Crash,

I understand where you are coming from...

My b/f''s friend''s FI, talks about her wedding non-stop (she planned it in less than a month)
Worst part, they were moving down the street from me!!! They did some real low things to get the house cheaper, then all said and done when there was prospect to build behind them, they backed out of the deal.. (I''m heart broken)
Well anyway the wedding was getting me annoyed that, she''d excluded me from conversation about wedding stuff and was asking him, my b/f (which is supposed to be the best man) if the speech was ready let?! :::gag:::: The wedding isn''t till Fall! Hello! Men don''t take months to prepare for a speech, they write it over night!!! (Felt like saying that when I heard)
His FI has always been rude to me for no reason and everyone says just don''t have them in your wedding. With all the politics of everyone saying that it isn''t right that since we''re supposed to be friends with them and we should BOTH we apart of the wedding made me think differently about weddings.
I told my boyfriend you know, I don''t think I ever want to get married, it creates too much politics and I have to invited people I''m not even fond of!
He said well I guess I''ll have to sell the ring back and I said we''ll just get married on a remote island then! lol

 

[MustangFan]

BTW He''s going to tell them that he doesn''t want to be the best man anymore because he can''t be fake and say how wonderful those two are after the dirty low and rotten things they did.

I wouldn''t let it get to you, you are that much wiser to realise that everything is a lot of work to maintain a certain lifestyle. I think it''s best to not have high expectantions in life, you are much less disappointment. Yes, it seems very exciting at first, but then reality sets in, and the beautiful house that makes you look rich, you soon realise they can''t afford the taxes because they insisted on both buying brand new cars. This is the position my cousin is in, they had to have everything at once, tiled pool, new cars, house, then baby 1 and now baby 2 on the way, both with college educations and still can''t make it.

 

[cRaSh]

Thanks MustangFan! I do know that I''m in better shape. It IS hard to go from having your own home, back to an apartment. I HATE apartment life!!!!! Especially with nasty, trashy neighbors. BLECH!!!

I hope things get better with your situation! And don''t let someone elses experience dictate what you do. Mine was a disaster, so are a lot of folks, but (ideally) it only happens once, and it is a special day!!! It shouldn''t be so political, and some people MAKE it that way. But with careful planning, giving yourself plenty of time, and a good savings, it can be WONDERFUL!!!

 

[MustangFan]

See you are cheering up already!

I want to have a unstressful wedding and fun, not dictating the girls that they have to wear their hair a certain way plz.........
We are actually contemplating on having the reception in our backyard. It would kill two birds with one stone, putting money into the backyard and reducing costs for the wedding (well at least I think it would...) It was be very cool, twinkling lights in a Marquee with a live Jazz band

Look me up if you are ever in NJ, we can meet up for drinks lol