Admiring/complimenting bling IRL

[RissaLou]

Thinking about it, most of the compliments I receive on my rings (from people I don't know) are from food servers or sales clerks -- I am always thrilled - sometimes it is a quick "your ring is so beautiful / sparkly" and sometimes they want to know what kind of stone (usually one of my Tanzanites) - but one person said "wow, your husband must really want people to know you're married" about my ER - I said "thank you" as a reflex but later I thought it was a strange way to phrase a compliment and maybe it wasn't?

But the other day I was on the subway (NYC) and I noticed a woman's classic emerald-cut solitaire - it wasn't a diamond but I couldn't get a good look to see what kind of colored gem it was - I glanced over several times (basically when I glimpsed movement out of the corner of my eye) hoping to catch a better view -- and then I noticed she moved the ring around so the gemstone was facing her palm and only the shank was viewable! I'm not sure if she noticed my looks and freaked out, or if she usually does this on the train and just had forgotten to turn it before. I would have been too far away to compliment her, and I was wearing gloves so my rings weren't visible... but still I wondered if my glances had creeped her out into turning her ring.

So I'm with the people who say the environment they're in often guides whether they offer a compliment or not -- I don't want to make people afraid or nervous, and I definitely don't want to make people feel so insecure they don't wear their jewelry.

I'm a behind the counter "sales clerk" complimenter (is that a word? ), not really a sales clerk, but similar atmosphere, I've found it's easier to compliment somebody from my posistion because they don't think I'm crazy or trying to rob them, most people will just take the compliment easier when there is no hint of a threat.

 

[Dancing Fire]

one time at a coffee shop i complimented a lady about her beautiful cushion,then she goes.. how did you know this is a cushion?

 

[TooPatient]

Oh Kenny, I was exaggerating! There really are no homeless people around my house. But I will let a complete stranger try it on. In the grocery store or a restaurant etc.

And Kizzy and Yaya can wear my jewelry anytime.

Be careful!

Back in high school I had a ring my grandmother had given me (nothing too fancy -- white gold in the shape of a rose with moissanite(?) to accent the petals) that I loved to wear (my grandfather had given it to her). A "friend" wanted to try it on so I handed it to her and she refused to give it back. The school wouldn't do anything so my mom took me to the police station where they had me fill out a report. The officer read through it and informed me that since I had handed it to her there was nothing they could do if she didn't want to give it back.
(I don't know how much of that was policy and how much was them just not wanting to deal with some kids...)

 

[rubybeth]

I used to work at a library checkout desk and would comment on beautiful jewelry if I liked it. The lighting was great with pendant spotlights at each workstation, so even crummy diamonds would sparkle like mad. I never had a negative reaction, but it wasn't like I was going to leap over the desk to steal their ring or grab their hand.

I can't remember any strangers ever complimenting my jewelry. Only family and friends commented when I got engaged and people asked to see the ring, but mostly they didn't say anything about the ring, just "Congrats!" I have one friend who works for her family's jewelry store and she has said repeatedly how much she loves my solitaire and how it's so classic. She's my only friend who is into jewelry.

 

[stci]

I like to receive and give compliments on jewels! It's a pleasure to say it's beautiful and it's wonderful to receive un compliment.

Just one time I regret my compliment and proove how I'm newbie on colored stones. I see a lady that I know with a beautiful ring and I compliment it. She answered " Ho! Thank you but I bought it at Zellers for 5 dollars".

After that I feel stupid and was probably red like a tomato!

 

[Amber St. Clare]

I do compliment others on their jewelry. I especially like unique settings or one of a kind pieces, and I an always looking at what others are wearing. I must have been a magpie in another life because I am attracted to sparkle. Even if it is a plain ring or neckace I usually do say something nice.

I don't let strangers get their hands on something of mine. About 10 years ago I let someone try on a pink sapphire ring I had just purchased {I was working in a candy store during the summer when a regular complimented it and asked to see it for closer look}. She was REALLY reluctant to give it back. I had to ask for it when several other people came in, I was sure she was going to walk out with it. But I let other people I do know try on anything they like. Except my pearls.

 

[sunseeker101]

I tend to compliment pieces belonging to people I know relatively well, and people who maybe un/intentionally invite comment (it's a fuzzy logic!) I think this is mostly because my own wedding-rings are symbolic to me and it feels like a type of misinterpretation to hear them reduced to, well, metal and rocks So I wouldn't want to 'intrude'. In PS it's the reverse, of course... The wonders of the internet

 

[wakingdreams53]

I heard about one homeless man who was begging.
My friend offered him some money and asked if there was anything else she could do for him.
He said, "Could you please just touch me? Nobody has touched me for years."

She hugged him and he cried.
This just broke my heart when I heard it.

Totally teared up. Had the impulse to state that. That's beautiful and so sad, Kenny.

 

[NOYFB]

Oh my, these stories about letting others try on your rings reminded me of a time when I first got my asscher and was showing it to a friend I hadn't seen in a long time. She was going through a divorce and therefore wasn't wearing her ring. In addition, she had been losing some weight and stated her ring no longer fit her anyway and wondered what size ring she might wear now. She asked to try my ring on to see if it would fit her (I'm a 4.25). I let her, but then she proceeded to shake her hand down at her side, to see if the ring was too big that it would FALL OFF! I was mortified, especially since we were sitting outside on the sidewalk at a restaurant. My ring could have easily slid off her finger onto the street! Luckily it didn't, but the look on my face in response to her complete lack of regard for my ring must have had an impact because I haven't spoken to her since...I have definitely learned my lesson about letting people "try on" my bling!

 

[stci]

Oh my, these stories about letting others try on your rings reminded me of a time when I first got my asscher and was showing it to a friend I hadn't seen in a long time. She was going through a divorce and therefore wasn't wearing her ring. In addition, she had been losing some weight and stated her ring no longer fit her anyway and wondered what size ring she might wear now. She asked to try my ring on to see if it would fit her (I'm a 4.25). I let her, but then she proceeded to shake her hand down at her side, to see if the ring was too big that it would FALL OFF! I was mortified, especially since we were sitting outside on the sidewalk at a restaurant. My ring could have easily slid off her finger onto the street! Luckily it didn't, but the look on my face in response to her complete lack of regard for my ring must have had an impact because I haven't spoken to her since...I have definitely learned my lesson about letting people "try on" my bling!

OMG!!!!!! Terrible!

 

[athenaworth]

I had this happen to me over the weekend. I'm fairly certain I saw a girl with an AVC (I've yet to see one in person) set with french cut diamonds and it was STUNNING. She was on my flight from LA to Ft. Lauderdale. I saw her in the waiting area and was totally tunnel visioning on it. Then I saw her sit down in first class and talk about how annoying it was that coach flyers would use their overhead space. That made me irritated, so I decided I didn't want to compliment her.

 

[pennquaker09]

I do it all the time. And I'm not a person that tends to strike up conversation with people I don't know.

 

[missy]

I had this happen to me over the weekend. I'm fairly certain I saw a girl with an AVC (I've yet to see one in person) set with french cut diamonds and it was STUNNING. She was on my flight from LA to Ft. Lauderdale. I saw her in the waiting area and was totally tunnel visioning on it. Then I saw her sit down in first class and talk about how annoying it was that coach flyers would use their overhead space. That made me irritated, so I decided I didn't want to compliment her.

LOL I have withheld a compliment or 2 myself because I saw the person whose jewelry I was admiring from afar was behaving in a less than nice way! I usually love to compliment people's jewelry when I see jewels I adore and I always enjoy receiving compliments though sometimes I feel awkward depending on the situation. What I hate is that I blush when complimented and that gets annoying for me...damn blushing

 

[Arcadian]

I always compliment. I had surgery on my tear duct Feb 23. When I woke up in recovery I noticed my nurse wearing a very lovely engagement ring. So of COURSE I had to say something! (I threw up 10 seconds later)

Once I stopped chucking she gave me all the details (it helped me also to keep my mind off of my churning stomach). So I think its appreciated when people make compliments.

-A

 

[Tanzigrrl]

Ooooh! I just have to post this! I just received a compliment on my most prized Tanzanite ring! I was helping a student with her computer issue and she said, "I just have to tell you, that's the most beautiful ring I've ever seen." YAY! It made my day.

 

[susimoo]

I always compliment bling and I love it when I receive compliments on my rings. I'll let homeless people try them on.

Really?
That is surprising - and in a way it is very very cool of you, and I admire your trusting and sharing something they don't get a chance to enjoy otherwise, much like sitting at the wheel of a Ferrari.
On the other hand I wonder if it can make certain homeless persons feel even worse about being homeless.
I'm sure it just really depends on the person since people vary so much.
How do they react?

I heard about one homeless man who was begging.
My friend offered him some money and asked if there was anything else she could do for him.
He said, "Could you please just touch me? Nobody has touched me for years."

She hugged him and he cried.
This just broke my heart when I heard it.

That just made me cry!

 

[Cehrabehra]

We got married at a courthouse with my great grandmothers ring and two years to the day had a big renewal with family and friends where I got a channel set half eternity. My old roommate was there and hoping to get engaged and she asked to try on my rings and then asked if she could wear the band for a while. I said yes. She got mad that no one found her when I threw the bouquet and took off with it! I had to get her to answer her phone after two days and BEG her to give me her address and when I got there she tried to say she didn't know where it was. I told her, "Dianne, that is my wedding ring and my great-grandmothers wedding ring, I can't leave without it." I was leaving the next day to fly back across country! She finally sighed a big dramatic sigh and went and got it with the whole "here" likeitwas such a bother. What a bitch! But at least I got it back

 

[Haven]

We got married at a courthouse with my great grandmothers ring and two years to the day had a big renewal with family and friends where I got a channel set half eternity. My old roommate was there and hoping to get engaged and she asked to try on my rings and then asked if she could wear the band for a while. I said yes. She got mad that no one found her when I threw the bouquet and took off with it! I had to get her to answer her phone after two days and BEG her to give me her address and when I got there she tried to say she didn't know where it was. I told her, "Dianne, that is my wedding ring and my great-grandmothers wedding ring, I can't leave without it." I was leaving the next day to fly back across country! She finally sighed a big dramatic sigh and went and got it with the whole "here" likeitwas such a bother. What a bitch! But at least I got it back

WHAT?!?!

Did I read this correctly? Your former roommate basically tried to STEAL your wedding set?
That is insane. I would have filed a police report. Seriously.
I'm so glad you got it back!

 

[PawnShopHustler]

I always compliment the bling!
I'm surrounded by the Art Deco heirlooms of my coworkers.
It makes me sick with envy.

 

[autumngems]

I always comment on something I like. It's nice when someone compliments mine. I've have a woman grab my hand and call her friend over, that was a little surprising but nice also.

 

[Gypsy]

I compliment it. Usually enthusiastically if I really love it. One of my new co-workers has a beautiful tanzanite necklace that I was gushing over the second I saw it. She was really happy I knew what the stone was, and that the color was high quality and that I liked the design.

I'm just ME. Take me or leave me.

But I do try to stick to people I KNOW, or at least have been introduced to. I normally (though there exceptions to every rule ) don't acost strangers over their bling.

 

[Black Jade]

Well, I think several of the stories here illustrate a fact I've known for a long time--compliments are one thing, letting people try on your jewelry is another.
I learned this lesson when I lent a silver bracelet to a boy I knew in high school. never saw it again. The bad thing was, when I told my parents they weren't at all surprised. My mom had lost jewelry the same way--and then learned her lesson. My brother later let a cousin try on a silver necklace and went through all kinds of stuff but the cousin never gave it back.
I only lend someone something, even only for a few minutes only if I am totally fine with never seeing it again, because there's apparently a lot of people inthe world, some entirely unexpected who have got the idea that once it touches their skin, it becomes theirs.
Sad but true.

 

[rosetta]

After hearing these stories, I'm never letting anyone try on my jewellery!