$332,442

[yennyfire]

4 years of college (which we hope to pay for to get them started in life debt free) will be about $200K in 10-15 years, so add in summer camp (2 weeks of Jewish overnight camp is $2500 x 2 kids), clothes, cars (safe, used...not new!), medical costs, etc. and I'm guessing we'll be close to Sarah's estimate....

 

[Dancing Fire]

[quote="justginger|1365404166|

It is different here though, isn't it? Because the Australian government provides so many family assistance payouts, you qualify for less assistance when you earn more. Is that what you mean?[/quote]

yes,here in the state of Pa. you can receive up to $70k in government assistance if your annual income is < $15k.

 

[Dancing Fire]

I'm always amazed by how many people usually jump in and state that the cost should never be a concern, they're always worth it. That may be true, for one or two or three...but at what point is it an overwhelming concern? At $300k each (though of course subsequent children would cost less), how many can a normal family afford to have? And of course, there's always the matter of choosing to have children while knowing full well that you can't afford them -- then the taxpayers get to raise your baby for you, which surely isn't fair.

and a high % of these babies are born out of wedlocks.

 

[Missy]

I suppose a child costs as much as you choose for him/her to cost.

Cheaper kids get hand-me-downs, buy their own car, public schools, free community activities, basic health care, handmade gifts, etc.
Expensive kids get brand names, private schools, big birthday parties with lots of presents, a host of lessons (music, art, sports, whatever), summer camps, pricey vacations, etc.

To be an obvious non-parent and compare children to pets -- my household fosters and resident pets could cost me literally 20% of what I choose to spend. But I have them on premium food, they use premium litter, they have expensive medications to make them comfortable, etc. I choose to have expensive pets, just as people choose to have expensive kids.

I think that people have children that cost them well into the millions, by choice. There are also people who have kids that probably cost a third of that average figure. But having considered the cost of living here today, I do think that average calculated amount is pretty accurate.

I'm always amazed by how many people usually jump in and state that the cost should never be a concern, they're always worth it. That may be true, for one or two or three...but at what point is it an overwhelming concern? At $300k each (though of course subsequent children would cost less), how many can a normal family afford to have? And of course, there's always the matter of choosing to have children while knowing full well that you can't afford them -- then the taxpayers get to raise your baby for you, which surely isn't fair.

Yes, this was a factor in our decision whether or not to have kids. It is irresponsible not to take this into account. You don't have to be rich to have kids but you cannot be poor and have 4, 5, 6 kids etc without someone paying the consequences.

 

[Dreamer_D]

DD, you and TP forgot about the most expensive years (17-22) cars,auto insurances,college tuitions,etc,etc...

I am not getting them cars thank you very much! They can take the bus like I did. And they can work part time if they want other luxuries like fancy phones etc.

Tuition is lower in Canada, but we will need to start the old RESP (tax free education account) savings account soon!

 

[Dreamer_D]

I'm always amazed by how many people usually jump in and state that the cost should never be a concern, they're always worth it. That may be true, for one or two or three...but at what point is it an overwhelming concern?

Money is a big reason why we will likely not have a third child. Although it would be awesome to have another kid because, well, our kids are awesome, it would change our lifestyle so much that its not something we would do lightly. It might not be the best thing for our personal well-being and for our kids well-being to be stretched further than we want to go.

 

[kenny]

DD, you and TP forgot about the most expensive years (17-22) cars,auto insurances,college tuitions,etc,etc...

I am not getting them cars thank you very much! They can take the bus like I did. And they can work part time if they want other luxuries like fancy phones etc.

Tuition is lower in Canada, but we will need to start the old RESP (tax free education account) savings account soon!

Didn't you get the memo?
Kids today are entitled to everything.

Don't you love your kids?
You're so mean.

 

[Dreamer_D]

DD, you and TP forgot about the most expensive years (17-22) cars,auto insurances,college tuitions,etc,etc...

I am not getting them cars thank you very much! They can take the bus like I did. And they can work part time if they want other luxuries like fancy phones etc.

Tuition is lower in Canada, but we will need to start the old RESP (tax free education account) savings account soon!

Didn't you get the memo?
Kids today are entitled to everything.

Don't you love your kids?
You're so mean.

ha! TRUE! I am very mean.

I grew up very very poor. I was one of those kids who's single mom relied on the social services that HOT was complaining about subsidizing earlier. We had nothing at all -- our FAMILY car was a $500 beater! So I figure my kids are better off than I was, even if I don't buy them a car. But I sure know the value of a dollar.

 

[rosetta]

IF we had a child and IF we wanted to send him or her to the kind of private school my husband and I went to.....

$332,442 would not even cover ten years of primary/secondary school education. I was lucky, I got scholarships. My in laws paid the lot for my husband.

I would not feel comfortable having kids until I could provide for them AT LEAST at the same level as our parents did for us. Is that weird of me?

 

[chemgirl]

We watch a lot of "Till Debt Do Us Part" and Gail throws around $250, 000 as the average price for raising a child in Canada. She also stresses that this is an average, so a particularly sporty kid, or lots of brand name clothing will push that number up!

I know I cost my parents a fortune before I found my first job.

I had a debate about this with SIL earlier this week. She has $100 per month budgeted for her daughter. RIght now she's on maternity leave so that price may be accurate, but wait until she needs daycare and solid food! Pretty sure my cat costs more than $100 per month.

 

[chemgirl]

DD, you and TP forgot about the most expensive years (17-22) cars,auto insurances,college tuitions,etc,etc...

I am not getting them cars thank you very much! They can take the bus like I did. And they can work part time if they want other luxuries like fancy phones etc.

Tuition is lower in Canada, but we will need to start the old RESP (tax free education account) savings account soon!

Probably a bit off topic, but I really don't get this car thing. In University, people actually asked me why my parents didn't buy me a car. Um, because they pay my tuition and rent me an apartment close to school, so why would they buy me a car? It seems a car is almost expected now.

 

[rosetta]

DD, you and TP forgot about the most expensive years (17-22) cars,auto insurances,college tuitions,etc,etc...

I am not getting them cars thank you very much! They can take the bus like I did. And they can work part time if they want other luxuries like fancy phones etc.

Tuition is lower in Canada, but we will need to start the old RESP (tax free education account) savings account soon!

Probably a bit off topic, but I really don't get this car thing. In University, people actually asked me why my parents didn't buy me a car. Um, because they pay my tuition and rent me an apartment close to school, so why would they buy me a car? It seems a car is almost expected now.

Yeah, my first car was bought with my first pay check! I'd never buy my kid a car.

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

ha! TRUE! I am very mean.

I grew up very very poor. I was one of those kids who's single mom relied on the social services that HOT was complaining about subsidizing earlier. We had nothing at all -- our FAMILY car was a $500 beater! So I figure my kids are better off than I was, even if I don't buy them a car. But I sure know the value of a dollar.

And this is why I don't bother posting opinions around here.

I was one of those kids as well when my parents divorced. I had a child at 20, do you think I did that on my own? I'm not begrudging anyone who needs these payments. I know that's where my taxes go and I am not complaining about that.

I am resentful that my money doesn't go as far as it is supposed to with the ever increasing cost of living here in Perth and that our government doesn't recognize this in any way.

And to make my original point again, it does cost more to raise a child when you make more money.

 

[justginger]

IF we had a child and IF we wanted to send him or her to the kind of private school my husband and I went to.....

$332,442 would not even cover ten years of primary/secondary school education. I was lucky, I got scholarships. My in laws paid the lot for my husband.

I would not feel comfortable having kids until I could provide for them AT LEAST at the same level as our parents did for us. Is that weird of me?

Those figures are exactly the same as here, hence why private schooling wasn't included in the original figure. There are schools here that hit $40k yearly, no worries, just in tuition alone.

I think wanting to provide to the same level as what you received is completely normal - or higher, if you know your upbringing was rough at times. I do think that may be the cause of such bratty kids though - they've never wanted for anything, never been denied anything.

 

[Dancing Fire]

JG...it pays to be poor in the U.S.

As taxpayers my wife and i can only afford to have two kids when my neighbors Mr.& Mrs. Entitlement across street can afford to have 5 kids running around w/o paying a single penny in taxes, don't you think there is something wrong with the system?

 

[TooPatient]

DD, you and TP forgot about the most expensive years (17-22) cars,auto insurances,college tuitions,etc,etc...

I am not getting them cars thank you very much! They can take the bus like I did. And they can work part time if they want other luxuries like fancy phones etc.

Tuition is lower in Canada, but we will need to start the old RESP (tax free education account) savings account soon!

Probably a bit off topic, but I really don't get this car thing. In University, people actually asked me why my parents didn't buy me a car. Um, because they pay my tuition and rent me an apartment close to school, so why would they buy me a car? It seems a car is almost expected now.

Yeah, my first car was bought with my first pay check! I'd never buy my kid a car.

Certainly expected!

FI and I have been talking. Thankfully, we are in agreement! We will NOT be handing "A" a car of her own to drive. So long as she's got access to some way to get to where she needs. A car is not an entitlement. She can work for it so that she's got some appreciation.

Leaves me grumbling in school to hear people talking. Their parents bought them a brand new (NOT used) car. Their parents pay the insurance. Their parents pay for all of the gas and maintenance. Then the whining about it not being a "good enough" car...

 

[Dancing Fire]

[quote="Dreamer_D|1365455823|

I grew up very very poor. I was one of those kids who's single mom relied on the social services that HOT was complaining about subsidizing earlier. We had nothing at all -- our FAMILY car was a $500 beater! So I figure my kids are better off than I was, even if I don't buy them a car. But I sure know the value of a dollar.[/quote]


DD,Good for you... you use the social system as a "safety net" not as a career... If more people followed your foot steps then our country wouldn't be in debt for $17 trillion.

 

[yssie]

Goodness some of these posts are really rubbing me the wrong way. Just because one's parents pay some of these costs doesn't mean one can't appreciate it!!

My parents paid for private school tuition.
Paid for four years at JHU.
Bought me a car and paid all associated costs - gas, maintenance, insurance.
Paid my rent.

They worked really, really hard for years and years to be able to do all of that for me, and I'm SO lucky that they were able and willing to do so. Not having to worry about getting enough part-time shifts to cover next month's rent gave me a huge leg up in school, and not being saddled with tens of thousands in student debt gave me a huge leg up after school, and that just makes me better prepared to take care of myself *and* them in the years to come. And I very much hope to do the same for my kids one day.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Yssie...are you my daughter? .. Seriously,I don't see anything wrong with parents helping out their kids to get a head start in life.

 

[rosetta]

Yssie...are you my daughter? .. Seriously,I don't see anything wrong with parents helping out their kids to get a head start in life.

None at all. I'm happy to pay expensive tuition, living expenses etc. I wouldn't want them to graduate in debt. That gave me a massive head start. I draw the line at cars, phones, fancy gadgets etc that they can get a part-time job to fund. I certainly did, to absolutely no detriment to my studies. It taught me good money management too. As just ginger pointed out, I don't want them to get too bratty and not have to work for a single thing! but I appreciate other families are different eg my husband got a BMW when he got into medical school. Whaaaaat?

 

[justginger]

JG...it pays to be poor in the U.S.

As taxpayers my wife and i can only afford to have two kids when my neighbors Mr.& Mrs. Entitlement across street can afford to have 5 kids running around w/o paying a single penny in taxes, don't you think there is something wrong with the system?

Of course there is - but I have no clue how to fix the problem. My grumble is people who knowingly plan and work at conceiving when they know they already can't afford the children they have. For all the people who have bad luck, a death, disability, or massive life changes, I am thrilled there is a system in place to help them get on their feet. My own mother was a single welfare mom with my brother, after she managed to leave her alcoholic, abusive first husband. She was so poor, even with assistance, that she had to leave a blanket over my brother's crib to keep the cockroaches off him.

Life circumstances changed so much between him and me (he's 12 years older), that my childhood was like yssie's. I don't know how I didn't turn out terribly demanding and entitled because I don't remember ever not getting something I wanted (including a car at 16, but at least it was used!). Then again, I don't remember asking for much either. Even back then I knew my material asks drained the family vacation fund and our yearly summer holiday was one if my favorite things ever.

Different strokes for different folks. But kids are more indulged and brattier than ever these days.

 

[chemgirl]

Goodness some of these posts are really rubbing me the wrong way. Just because one's parents pay some of these costs doesn't mean one can't appreciate it!!

My parents paid for private school tuition.
Paid for four years at JHU.
Bought me a car and paid all associated costs - gas, maintenance, insurance.
Paid my rent.

They worked really, really hard for years and years to be able to do all of that for me, and I'm SO lucky that they were able and willing to do so. Not having to worry about getting enough part-time shifts to cover next month's rent gave me a huge leg up in school, and not being saddled with tens of thousands in student debt gave me a huge leg up after school, and that just makes me better prepared to take care of myself *and* them in the years to come. And I very much hope to do the same for my kids one day.

I realize that many kids do appreciate what their parents do for them!

I think the car thing is at the top of my mind at the moment because two coworkers recently gifted their children cars. My boss's son is embarrassed to drive the cheap piece of junk (he used more explicit terms) to school. Its a brand spanking new version of my car. A different coworker bought a new car and gifted her daughter her 4 year old used car. Only comment was "its old" and I have yet to see Mom bring the new car to work.

Its situations like these that irk me. When a parent gives their kids everything and its not good enough.

 

[TooPatient]

Goodness some of these posts are really rubbing me the wrong way. Just because one's parents pay some of these costs doesn't mean one can't appreciate it!!

My parents paid for private school tuition.
Paid for four years at JHU.
Bought me a car and paid all associated costs - gas, maintenance, insurance.
Paid my rent.

They worked really, really hard for years and years to be able to do all of that for me, and I'm SO lucky that they were able and willing to do so. Not having to worry about getting enough part-time shifts to cover next month's rent gave me a huge leg up in school, and not being saddled with tens of thousands in student debt gave me a huge leg up after school, and that just makes me better prepared to take care of myself *and* them in the years to come. And I very much hope to do the same for my kids one day.

I realize that many kids do appreciate what their parents do for them!

I think the car thing is at the top of my mind at the moment because two coworkers recently gifted their children cars. My boss's son is embarrassed to drive the cheap piece of junk (he used more explicit terms) to school. Its a brand spanking new version of my car. A different coworker bought a new car and gifted her daughter her 4 year old used car. Only comment was "its old" and I have yet to see Mom bring the new car to work.

Its situations like these that irk me. When a parent gives their kids everything and its not good enough.

That is what we're finding so difficult to balance. FI and I both had difficult times growing up. We had to work for what we have. We still have to work for what we have. Through all of that we both feel accomplished and proud of what WE did.

We'd like "A" to have the same sense of accomplishment and appreciation for what she gets in her life, but at the same time we don't want her to struggle in the same ways we have had to.

Such a balancing act!

 

[Dreamer_D]

ha! TRUE! I am very mean.

I grew up very very poor. I was one of those kids who's single mom relied on the social services that HOT was complaining about subsidizing earlier. We had nothing at all -- our FAMILY car was a $500 beater! So I figure my kids are better off than I was, even if I don't buy them a car. But I sure know the value of a dollar.

And this is why I don't bother posting opinions around here.

I was one of those kids as well when my parents divorced. I had a child at 20, do you think I did that on my own? I'm not begrudging anyone who needs these payments. I know that's where my taxes go and I am not complaining about that.

I am resentful that my money doesn't go as far as it is supposed to with the ever increasing cost of living here in Perth and that our government doesn't recognize this in any way.

And to make my original point again, it does cost more to raise a child when you make more money.

I get an eye roll for aknowledging your post? That seems odd. You did basically complain about how you subsidize lower income families by paying more for services than they pay. You even itemized all of the ways in which lower income families are better off than you are. I merely acknowledged your complaint in my original post.

But since you seem to want to discuss this more.

Sure it costs more in absolute dollars to raise a child when you are well off. I spend more on daycare anually right now than my mother earned in two years when I was growing up. But in relative dollars or proportional dollars there is no comparison at all -- poor families pay much much more to raise a child than wealthy families. And they do it without any of the perks to which most of the people in this thread are accustomed -- myself included.

If you were truly only mad or resentful of the goverment that doesn't extend the same "perks" to middle or upper class people, then raise heck and blast the government. I am annoyed that I am only able to claim a $7000 deduction on my taxes for daycare when I pay clost to $20k, for example. But don't post all about the ways in which those lucky poor people get off easy raising kids! And if you DO post like that, then don't be surprised when someone responds to you. Because frankly, if you WERE poor at one time, then its really sad that you can't remember what that was like anymore

Dancing Fire The state supports poor families because even if their parents were irresponsible know-nothings -- and we can argue about whether that is a fair assessment of poor people some other day -- their kids still need to eat and live. And hey, you could afford to have five kids too -- if you fed the McDonald's every day, if you did not pay for them to have any new clothing, if you made them get part time jobs from age 16 to help support the family, if you did not give them any money to go to school, if you put three of them in the same bedroom, if you never ever took a vacation anywhere.... Oh yeah, that sounds GREAT! It sure does pay to be poor! Sign me up, why am I working at all?

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

ha! TRUE! I am very mean.

I grew up very very poor. I was one of those kids who's single mom relied on the social services that HOT was complaining about subsidizing earlier. We had nothing at all -- our FAMILY car was a $500 beater! So I figure my kids are better off than I was, even if I don't buy them a car. But I sure know the value of a dollar.

And this is why I don't bother posting opinions around here.

I was one of those kids as well when my parents divorced. I had a child at 20, do you think I did that on my own? I'm not begrudging anyone who needs these payments. I know that's where my taxes go and I am not complaining about that.

I am resentful that my money doesn't go as far as it is supposed to with the ever increasing cost of living here in Perth and that our government doesn't recognize this in any way.

And to make my original point again, it does cost more to raise a child when you make more money.

I get an eye roll for aknowledging your post? That seems odd. You did basically complain about how you subsidize lower income families by paying more for services than they pay. You even itemized all of the ways in which lower income families are better off than you are. I merely acknowledged your complaint in my original post.

But since you seem to want to discuss this more.

Sure it costs more in absolute dollars to raise a child when you are well off. I spend more on daycare anually right now than my mother earned in two years when I was growing up. But in relative dollars or proportional dollars there is no comparison at all -- poor families pay much much more to raise a child than wealthy families. And they do it without any of the perks to which most of the people in this thread are accustomed -- myself included.

If you were truly only mad or resentful of the goverment that doesn't extend the same "perks" to middle or upper class people, then raise heck and blast the government. I am annoyed that I am only able to claim a $7000 deduction on my taxes for daycare when I pay clost to $20k, for example. But don't post all about the ways in which those lucky poor people get off easy raising kids! And if you DO post like that, then don't be surprised when someone responds to you. Because frankly, if you WERE poor at one time, then its really sad that you can't remember what that was like anymore

Dancing Fire The state supports poor families because even if their parents were irresponsible know-nothings -- and we can argue about whether that is a fair assessment of poor people some other day -- their kids still need to eat and live. And hey, you could afford to have five kids too -- if you fed the McDonald's every day, if you did not pay for them to have any new clothing, if you made them get part time jobs from age 16 to help support the family, if you did not give them any money to go to school, if you put three of them in the same bedroom, if you never ever took a vacation anywhere.... Oh yeah, that sounds GREAT! It sure does pay to be poor! Sign me up, why am I working at all?

You got an eye roll for saying that I complained about having to subsidize other families because that was honestly not the intention of my post, nor is it the POV that I hold personally. I can probably see why you would assume that from my post, but that's what happens when you post on the fly in between tasks, I just quickly tried to illustrate how one family would pay more than another for the save services.

The family X to family Y comparison was a generalisation. I personally pay very little tax (about 5% of my annual income last year?) so I doubt that I contribute to any families that receive benefits anyway, can't really complain about that, can I?

Out of the itemized list that I gave, the only one that I am personally upset about would be the private health care rebate, last year I was eligible for a 30% rebate, this year I am not. That would be the ONLY thing I would bregrudge someone for, and even then it's directed to the government! They took it away from me, the low income families didn't.

I recently met a single mother to 4 teenagers. One of her kids attends a prestigious school here in Perth, their tuition fees are $50k + a year. This mum has been unemployed for 20 years, I assume her son attends this school under a scholarship. He has a school camp coming up, the fee for this camp (international trip) is equal to the amount this mum receives a year on the pension. The only way he can go on the camp is through government assistance. His mum is applying for all sort of things to cover the cost and I really hope she gets it and he gets to go on this camp. I'm glad that there are opportunities for them to do this and that our government supplies it. I would never hold this opportunity against him, just because they can't personally afford to pay for it. In fact, I'm in awe of his mums ability to make this happen despite the financial hurdles.

I haven't forgotten what it is like to be 'poor'. I did, however, imagine that earning 'good' money would make it easier to live than what it has turned out to be.

 

[Laila619]

I suppose a child costs as much as you choose for him/her to cost.

Cheaper kids get hand-me-downs, buy their own car, public schools, free community activities, basic health care, handmade gifts, etc.
Expensive kids get brand names, private schools, big birthday parties with lots of presents, a host of lessons (music, art, sports, whatever), summer camps, pricey vacations, etc.

Yep, exactly. We have two kids, and we're doing just fine--we are by no means rich, but we don't have an expensive lifestyle. But our kids will never want for love, affection, or attention!

 

[Laila619]

Goodness some of these posts are really rubbing me the wrong way. Just because one's parents pay some of these costs doesn't mean one can't appreciate it!!

My parents paid for private school tuition.
Paid for four years at JHU.
Bought me a car and paid all associated costs - gas, maintenance, insurance.
Paid my rent.

They worked really, really hard for years and years to be able to do all of that for me, and I'm SO lucky that they were able and willing to do so. Not having to worry about getting enough part-time shifts to cover next month's rent gave me a huge leg up in school, and not being saddled with tens of thousands in student debt gave me a huge leg up after school, and that just makes me better prepared to take care of myself *and* them in the years to come. And I very much hope to do the same for my kids one day.

Yssie, I think it all depends on the individual kid. I had all this too, and was a spoiled brat who didn't appreciate it at the time. I wasted a lot of my parents' money blowing off classes in college and not doing my best.

Some kids (like you obviously) really appreciate this tremendous gift and use it wisely, while others don't and they would be better off having to work/earn it all themselves.

 

[yssie]

Goodness some of these posts are really rubbing me the wrong way. Just because one's parents pay some of these costs doesn't mean one can't appreciate it!!

My parents paid for private school tuition.
Paid for four years at JHU.
Bought me a car and paid all associated costs - gas, maintenance, insurance.
Paid my rent.

They worked really, really hard for years and years to be able to do all of that for me, and I'm SO lucky that they were able and willing to do so. Not having to worry about getting enough part-time shifts to cover next month's rent gave me a huge leg up in school, and not being saddled with tens of thousands in student debt gave me a huge leg up after school, and that just makes me better prepared to take care of myself *and* them in the years to come. And I very much hope to do the same for my kids one day.

Yssie, I think it all depends on the individual kid. I had all this too, and was a spoiled brat who didn't appreciate it at the time. I wasted a lot of my parents' money blowing off classes in college and not doing my best.

Some kids (like you obviously) really appreciate this tremendous gift and use it wisely, while others don't and they would be better off having to work/earn it all themselves.

You're right Laila... I just reacted and posted.

My parents aren't "old money" or anything even close - they both grew up in poor families in poor communities and everything they have now is thanks to working for it. While I personally never went without anything I needed - or even really anything I wanted... when I go to India I see where they grew up, the school my dad went to and the tree under which he had math class (they have desks indoors now!) - and I guess that's enough to drive it home? I can definitely believe that if I'd truly had no idea - even that sheltered third-generation view - I may well have been a lot more cavalier with those resources.

 

[Polished]

I remember being at a playgroup when our three children were young and one of the women told me, that an older person, had said to her pre-children, "it will never be the right time and you will never have enough money". I think this is true; you can plan, you can save but choosing to have children and taking the plunge involves a leap of faith. Choosing to have a third child was similarly a leap of faith for us. It turned out brilliantly - our daughters are the best of friends and have been a wonderful influence on each other.

I've been amazed by how much the children have cost us and made us keenly aware of the high cost of living, even with well paid jobs. I haven't begrudged the money though as I've wanted to spend the money on building their lives and whatever we couldn't afford they didn't get. Now they each have part time jobs and can afford to buy their own stuff and also finance their own trips away during uni holidays etc.

I have to say that I appreciated the things we did pre-children that would not have been possible after we had them. The study, the three year working holiday we took travelling the world, the restaurant dinners.

We also financed a largeish house in an area close to the schools we wanted to send the children to. Over the next few years, we plan to downsize and the savings should free up a bit of room to enjoy some of the things that would be nice to do once we are free of financial responsibility with the children.

 

[arkieb1]

Hi,

I currently live in Brisbane, I have lived in Sydney and worked (English History teacher) in one of Sydney's most elite private girl's schools - that amount would barely cover all the fees over a child's schooling let alone laptops (which were compulsory to buy) Ipads, uniforms, school bags, trips overseas etc. I saw both ends of the spectrum, parents who both worked two jobs to send their kids to that type of school so they could give their kids a so called "better life" and parents who bought their kids BMWs and other high end cars as gifts for getting certain marks in school tests (yes that really does happen). I met one girl who had parents buying her pink mag wheels for her BMW that were going to cost between $6000.00 and $8000.00 a number of years ago, as a reward/bribe for something.

I then moved to Rural NSW and worked in a public school - there is no way parents would spend that amount on kids over the same period, doesn't matter if they were middle or working class they just wouldn't. So I guess it depends where you live.

Capital cities here especially Sydney are ridiculously expensive for all living costs including education. I can remember when I had my son someone told me it doesn't matter if he doesn't have a designer cot or a designer pram all babies and kids in general care about is a parent that loves and supports them through life. And I have to agree.

The material stuff really doesn't matter, the best thing we can give our kids is our time and a strong set of values to do the best they can in life and respect themselves and others. In a society that is relatively cash rich and time poor turning out more and more kids with behaviour issues perhaps our focus should be less on what we have to buy our kids in order to keep up with the Jones' and to compensate for the guilt we feel because we have to work or be away from our kids and more on what we can do to find to time to be positive role models and mentors.