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10 Year Anni, Can''t Afford Upgrade -- Dilemna!

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BlingMama

BlingMama

Rough_Rock
Joined
Apr 17, 2010
Messages
6
Hi All,

This is my first posting on PS and I''m hoping y''all might be able to give me some good input. My ten year anniversary is fast approaching and it turns out that we are just not financially in the place to upgrade my engagement ring. I currently have a 1.41 RB, VVS1, H color, flanked by two nice pears set in platinum. This is paired with a wedding band similar to a Tiffany Etoile (I think that is what the style is.) I have been HUNGERING for a an upgrade to a 2+ cushion set in a something like a micropave halo with a shank and basket that is diamond encrusted paired with a matching band. Soooooooo, the question is, do I just have my current RB center stone reset in a cushion-shaped setting and get a matching band or do I just get a nice blingy necklace. I could use a blingy necklace but have had my heart set on this upgrade and am having a very difficult time wrapping my head around the fact that it may or may not happen in the next 3 to 5 to 7 years...Thoughts?

Thanks!

BlingMama
 
What is your budget for this new project?
 
Unfortunately, it is $5,000 tops. I understand that to upgrade stone plus new setting and band would be in the $20,000 range and that''s modest. Is this correct? I did find a supposedly well-reputed LA jeweler willing to sell me the setting that I had my heart set on with a 1.71 cushion, H color, and I think SI1 clarity, faint flourescence for $10,000 plus trading my current e ring. Don''t really want to part with my excellent quality current e ring for a cushion that is a) smaller than what I truly desire and of lesser quality. That, and as I said, we really only have about $5,000 to work with. *sigh*
 
BlingMama, if it were me, I would buy the biggest stone I could for the money and put it in a temporary setting. I would buy the stone from a vendor that has an excellent upgrade policy. Then I would work up

to the size stone I wanted. For the last couple years I have had my DH consolidate all the presents into my upgrade fixation.

It would be like you just get to ''borrow'' a stone until you get the forever one.(if there is such a thing!
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Bling, can you go out and look at some lower coloured cushions in person? One of the marvellous things about cushions, esp. chunky cushions, is that the antique, ivory shades of white suit them so well
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A lower-coloured (J-M) cushion in the size and clarity you want might be doable with a trade of your current RB.



One thing to consider: cushions do face up deep, so you may find that a 2ct cushion doesn't look significantly bigger than your 1.4 RB.


ETA: I said "face up deep", should've been "small", but you got my meaning!
 
Yssie, yes. I have discovered that that might be the case regarding size and that is why my dream cushion would be in the 2.5 or 2.7 range in order to show a size difference from my 1.41 RB. As far as color, I am sure you are right and maybe I am just being snobby or ignorant but I just love the idea of having at least an H color or higher -- I really like the whighter, brighter look. As far as getting a bigger stone in a temporary setting, I think I simply cannot afford a bigger diamond of any sort right now which is why my dilemma is turning out to be, new setting and band for current stone and just wait for the day when I can go cushion and bigger or simply put my money into a nice necklace. Just really hard to know where to put the money right now...I know, I know, such decisions, right? I feel lucky that this my only big dilemma right now
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Am trying to figure out how to attach pics of my current set but my files are too big and I can''t figure out how to compress...
 
Honestly?


You sound like you really want that upgrade, and I think if you go with either a reset or a necklace a part of you will always wish you could have the bigger stone instead. So put the 5k into an account and try to forget about it for a few more months/years until you''ve got another 5k saved, then go for the BIG upgrade.


JMHO.
 
I''d save until you can get what you want. Don''t buy something and settle... You''ll regret it.
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Ummmmmm, yes, honestly. Do I really sound that bad? I was a little afraid to post here for fear of folks thinking I was being a whiner but then I saw similar posts and decided to go ahead and ask for advice. Yssie, yes, you are absolutely right. I really do want the upgrade and I think I will have to wait. This sight is tad addictive and it is almost more difficult to wait it out now that I know where to come to gaze at such beautiful eye candy.
 
Date: 4/18/2010 12:45:19 AM
Author: BlingMama
Ummmmmm, yes, honestly. Do I really sound that bad? I was a little afraid to post here for fear of folks thinking I was being a whiner but then I saw similar posts and decided to go ahead and ask for advice. Yssie, yes, you are absolutely right. I really do want the upgrade and I think I will have to wait. This sight is tad addictive and it is almost more difficult to wait it out now that I know where to come to gaze at such beautiful eye candy.
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Oh silly, you're worrying about nothing. This is a diamond forum, if you're shallow then we all are, and we'll have fun with it together
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. And yes, this site is addictive!


I'm glad you've decided to wait, when you have your new ROCK you won't regret it!
 
Date: 4/18/2010 12:45:19 AM
Author: BlingMama
Ummmmmm, yes, honestly. Do I really sound that bad? I was a little afraid to post here for fear of folks thinking I was being a whiner but then I saw similar posts and decided to go ahead and ask for advice. Yssie, yes, you are absolutely right. I really do want the upgrade and I think I will have to wait. This sight is tad addictive and it is almost more difficult to wait it out now that I know where to come to gaze at such beautiful eye candy.
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It is painful, but I always tryto advise people to not spend a penny until they can get what they want. I am very bad at trying to stick with that advice sometimes, though I have so far been fairly successful
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, but it is the best.

I do think that putting the 5k into a nice cushion from Good Old Gold and enjoying it while you save for a larger diamond would be a nice compromise though!

Have you seen the August Vintage Cushions? www.goodoldgold.com check it out.
 
Thanks, gals! I need all the support I can get to make sure my ring envy doesn''t eat me alive
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To make you feel better, not everyone gets an upgrade on 10th year anniversary. I did not get an upgrade on my 10-yr anniversary, partly because I''m emotionally attached to my original e-ring and partly because I couldn''t make up my mind on the stone/setting I want. Since I don''t plan to trade in my original e-ring, the upgrade will be VERY costly.

I can totally understand your "itch" though. It''s hard not to have ring envy when I go through all those beautiful "show me your bling" pictures.
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Yeah, wait and save.
Buying and selling makes money go POOF!
 
IMHO, you are not whiny at all. In fact, one of the things I really love about this forum, is that you can ask anything and everyone knows where you''re coming from.

You can break this into 2 options:

5k + 10k trade in = 15k for big 2 carat cushion such as JA (just for an example) with a nice simple band: JA band example

or

Save the 5k, know that your current ering has trade in potential, and wait. No one really knows what the future holds, and things could get easier quicker than you expect.JA band example

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I would hold off on the ring entirely because as soon as you get the new stone you''ll probably NEED a new setting so replacing a setting you like isn''t going to fix anything - at least with a necklace you can add to your collection without redundancy.

Honestly though, I would set the money aside and start saving toward what you really want, one thousand at a time.
 
I vote for a compromise. If you spend the 5K on a beautiful pendant stone from a vendor with a good upgrade policy, you can *enjoy* the money while you''re saving for the "dream" stone - just consider the cost of the (simplest possible) setting and the trade-in the cost of, a) enjoying the money in the meantime, and, b) possibly the opportunity to test-drive a few different shape/color combinations.
 
another option - 5K can buy you a very blingy anniversary eternity band...
 
good idea, Waterlilly!
 
First of all, let me say that your current ring sounds beautiful. I think that all the posters here have given you wonderful advise....save your money until you get what you really want. I too wanted a blingy necklace (or so I thought) and went out and bought one. Unfortunately, it felt way over the top for our very middle-class lifestyle and it spent more time in the drawer rather than on my neck. I was sick over it as it was pricy and I just wasn''t wearing it. Luckly, the jeweler I bought it from was kind enough to take it back. That doesn''t always happen. $5000 is a lot to spend and can go a long way in saving toward your upgrade. I understand it''s tough to wait but just look at the prize at the end.
 
Your current set sounds beautiful!

I agree with the other posters, it sounds like you know exactly what you want and won''t be happy with substitutes so... I would either sock the money away and start saving intentionally for the upgrade (11, 12, 13, 14, and 15 are all great anniversaries too:-) OR I would buy a gorgeous upgradeable stone from a vendor you love and wear it while you keep saving (either as a pendant or a RHR).

here are a few options...

http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/6360/

http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/6906/

http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/7139/

http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/7095/

http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/3400/

BGD also has cushions, but I can''t get them to pop up on the search right now....
 
Date: 4/18/2010 9:38:22 AM
Author: Bella_mezzo
Your current set sounds beautiful!


I agree with the other posters, it sounds like you know exactly what you want and won't be happy with substitutes so... I would either sock the money away and start saving intentionally for the upgrade (11, 12, 13, 14, and 15 are all great anniversaries too:-) OR I would buy a gorgeous upgradeable stone from a vendor you love and wear it while you keep saving (either as a pendant or a RHR).


here are a few options...


http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/6360/


http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/6906/


http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/7139/


http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/7095/


http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/3400/


BGD also has cushions, but I can't get them to pop up on the search right now....
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I love the first stone on Bella's list, but that last one has my pulse fluttering!

BTW, since you know you love cushions, it might be worth contacting Mark at Engagement Rings Direct (he's known as the local cushion guru) to see if there's anything he can do, either in terms of suggesting a temp stone or in terms of seeing if he might consider accepting your current stone ....
 
Date: 4/18/2010 7:28:24 AM
Author: Circe
I vote for a compromise. If you spend the 5K on a beautiful pendant stone from a vendor with a good upgrade policy, you can *enjoy* the money while you''re saving for the ''dream'' stone - just consider the cost of the (simplest possible) setting and the trade-in the cost of, a) enjoying the money in the meantime, and, b) possibly the opportunity to test-drive a few different shape/color combinations.
Click to expand...

I agree with Circe...buy a stone (with an excellent upgrade policy) and wear it as a pendant (or RHR) in an inexpensive setting and
continue to save money till you have enough for that big upgrade! GOG has beautiful cushions.
 
Save your money until you can get what you want. I always regretting settling for something.
 
Went to bed and woke up to all these great replies. Lots of god ideas. Now to think and ponder. Thanks so much for all the posts. This site is excellent. One more question re. Marc at ERD. So, do people just communicate with him via email/phone and then purchase their stone sight unseen? I know my husband who really doesn''t know anything about the jewelry world would think this is insane. And frankly, I would have a hard time whipping out my credit card for that much money without inspecting the rock first. Is that how it works or am I missing something? Do they have brick and mortar business at all and what state do they work out of?

Best,
 
I agree with saving until you an get what you want.. there''s no point settling on such a big purchase/meaningful object. Perhaps use a small amount of the 5,000$ and get a simple pendant or other small piece that you will enjoy while saving the rest of the 5,000$ and saving as much as you can to get your ideal upgrade :)
 
Date: 4/18/2010 11:33:30 AM
Author: BlingMama
Went to bed and woke up to all these great replies. Lots of god ideas. Now to think and ponder. Thanks so much for all the posts. This site is excellent. One more question re. Marc at ERD. So, do people just communicate with him via email/phone and then purchase their stone sight unseen? I know my husband who really doesn't know anything about the jewelry world would think this is insane. And frankly, I would have a hard time whipping out my credit card for that much money without inspecting the rock first. Is that how it works or am I missing something? Do they have brick and mortar business at all and what state do they work out of?

Best,
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He will often send pics too, but yes, this is the general process
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ETA He is in the diamond district of NY, and I should add that he and other PS vendors have inspection periods with 100% refunds so you can see the diamond before you finalize the sale.

Honestly, I much prefer GOG for you for a few reasons: Better upgrade policy (I think with ERD yo uhave to psend double whereas with GOG you can spend any amount for the upgrade); and GOG will send great quality pics, videos, will compare multiple diamonds for you.
 
When my husband wanted to by a plasma TV one the observations he came across was that previous purchasers always said that they had wished they bought the "bigger" one. (So he bought the bigger one and its way too big for the space -- but, it''s like going to the movies every night!)

I agree with the "save" until you can get what you really want. The only problem with that is...didn''t Kenny say that prices were going up?
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You''d have to save quickly!
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Thread hijack-- What does "ETA" stand for??? I''ve figured out a lot of the abbreviations, but I can''t figure this one out!
 
Date: 4/18/2010 3:41:05 PM
Author: spicytuna
When my husband wanted to by a plasma TV one the observations he came across was that previous purchasers always said that they had wished they bought the ''bigger'' one. (So he bought the bigger one and its way too big for the space -- but, it''s like going to the movies every night!)

I agree with the ''save'' until you can get what you really want. The only problem with that is...didn''t Kenny say that prices were going up?
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You''d have to save quickly!
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Thread hijack-- What does ''ETA'' stand for??? I''ve figured out a lot of the abbreviations, but I can''t figure this one out!
Click to expand...
Edited to Add.
 
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