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Your very last wish
- Thread starter missy
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Immediately as I was posting this question I realized it's not a great thread my apologies.
I too have no clue what I would wish for because the only thing I wish for really is good health for all my friends and family.
And then world peace. Two things we cannot wish to happen in the real world but only a fairy tale world
So I am sorry because I think this thread topic is boring and no lively conversation will be forthcoming
My brain is mush lately lol
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You may not be able to wave a wand and give your loved ones better health or world peace.
However, we all have the ability to provide change in the world. I’m not sure it’s a last moment thing but more of a lifetime thing. It’s raising your kids the right way and modeling your behaviors to the way you wish that perfect world was so your kids can continue on the legacy. So many of our good and bad things in life comes from the way we were raised so if you truly want to impact the world then start with your children.
Also I might add that random acts of kindness and help further that desire. Ever protect someone? Maybe offer a neighbor a seat in your tornado shelter during a bad storm? Maybe make some food for the sick neighbor or neighbor that recently came home from the hospital? Maybe just listened to the Spirit of God and leave a $100 tip to a waitress that is a single mom? Maybe just collect the dishes and trash at your table and stack nearly for the waiter or waitress that is clearly having a bad day? Maybe sensing someone’s pain and empathizing with them or telling them a joke to lift their spirit? Maybe just saying “job well done” when you see excellence from a nurse, receptionist, etc? Maybe just recognizing someone and make them feel important and valued by stating their actual name and saying something like “I’m glad to see you today Xxx, I appreciate you and your friendship/contribution so much”?
As I mature I learn all the things that make me most happy and fulfilled is to lift and brighten others.
But to answer your initial question I guess my last wish is to know that I never let fear stand in my way of life and adventures and that I loved and gave my very best to everyone so I can look back on life without regret but with security knowing I lived every ounce of life given me to the fullest of my ability and that my closest friends, relatives and loved ones know my love and respect of them will continue rather I’m here or not. That “last wish” takes a lot of everyday grind that I often fail to do but keep trying to do my best anyhow!
However, we all have the ability to provide change in the world. I’m not sure it’s a last moment thing but more of a lifetime thing. It’s raising your kids the right way and modeling your behaviors to the way you wish that perfect world was so your kids can continue on the legacy. So many of our good and bad things in life comes from the way we were raised so if you truly want to impact the world then start with your children.
Also I might add that random acts of kindness and help further that desire. Ever protect someone? Maybe offer a neighbor a seat in your tornado shelter during a bad storm? Maybe make some food for the sick neighbor or neighbor that recently came home from the hospital? Maybe just listened to the Spirit of God and leave a $100 tip to a waitress that is a single mom? Maybe just collect the dishes and trash at your table and stack nearly for the waiter or waitress that is clearly having a bad day? Maybe sensing someone’s pain and empathizing with them or telling them a joke to lift their spirit? Maybe just saying “job well done” when you see excellence from a nurse, receptionist, etc? Maybe just recognizing someone and make them feel important and valued by stating their actual name and saying something like “I’m glad to see you today Xxx, I appreciate you and your friendship/contribution so much”?
As I mature I learn all the things that make me most happy and fulfilled is to lift and brighten others.
But to answer your initial question I guess my last wish is to know that I never let fear stand in my way of life and adventures and that I loved and gave my very best to everyone so I can look back on life without regret but with security knowing I lived every ounce of life given me to the fullest of my ability and that my closest friends, relatives and loved ones know my love and respect of them will continue rather I’m here or not. That “last wish” takes a lot of everyday grind that I often fail to do but keep trying to do my best anyhow!
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Yes to this 100%. It gives me joy and strength to help others
Love your answer @sledge and agree with all of it. Thank you for sharing
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My last wish is pretty simple. I would like to be by the ocean as much as possible. And, while this is out of my hands, I would love for there to be a good rainstorm so I can listen to the patter on the room... and one glorious sunny day to warm my face and soul. All while listening to the rush of waves, taking in the scent of the salt air, and looking out into the wide open expanse.
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Rons Wolfe
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MeowMeow
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Honestly mine would be for my daughter and husband. For my daughter I would just wish for her a happy life, with whomever she wishes to be with and that they treat her well. And that my husband is happy and healthy for the rest of his. Even if it means he gets remarried. I wouldn't want him to be alone and sad for the remainder of his life. My mother died when she was in her early 50s when I was a teenager and her father I want to say was in his 60s and I am not very healthy so I've thought of this a lot.
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If I am mobile I would like to spend time with my husband by the water.
If I am bed-bound, then I would like to spend time with my husband listening to music and talking, with a good view to the outdoors and fresh air coming in the window.
If I am in hospice and on morphine, I would like to pass away quickly and quietly.
If I am bed-bound, then I would like to spend time with my husband listening to music and talking, with a good view to the outdoors and fresh air coming in the window.
If I am in hospice and on morphine, I would like to pass away quickly and quietly.
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Man, this thread has been nagging at me. My mom died unexpectedly the morning after Christmas (this past year, 2022). I was back home for the holidays and we were supposed to meet with her and other family for breakfast before we headed out. She was very excited about it so I found it odd she missed. Afterwards, on the way out of town while filling up with gas I sent her a text telling her I loved her and was sorry we missed each other but we would catch her on our next trip. Later I would learn that would be my last text.
We had made it about 1/3 way back when I got a call from my aunt who was sobbing uncontrollably. Before she said the words I knew. I normally do decent with this sort of thing but I was numb. My wife encouraged me to pull over at a rest stop. It’s one of the handful of times in my life I broke down and felt I didn’t have the answers. I gathered myself, we turned around, went back and handled all the funeral arrangements, etc.
What seems abnormal to me is our relationship was difficult and strained for much of the time. My grandparents actually raised me. Despite her shortcomings she always loved me and was very proud of the things I’ve done and person I’ve become. In many ways she got me in ways that others didn’t. I’ve been through some hell and she was one of the few that checked on me. She never held judgment against me and was always on my side, even if she didn’t fully understand the details or situation.
Some things had happened that made me stop talking to her. Of course, she was too big of a pain in the ass to let that happen, lol. She would talk to me anyways. After some encouragement from my wife, I had recently started the repair process. About a month before I had sent her an message apologizing and forgiving her for her part and asking the same.
If I could wish for something on her behalf I want that breakfast, time, conversations and hugs with her just to reaffirm we were at a good place with each other.
We had made it about 1/3 way back when I got a call from my aunt who was sobbing uncontrollably. Before she said the words I knew. I normally do decent with this sort of thing but I was numb. My wife encouraged me to pull over at a rest stop. It’s one of the handful of times in my life I broke down and felt I didn’t have the answers. I gathered myself, we turned around, went back and handled all the funeral arrangements, etc.
What seems abnormal to me is our relationship was difficult and strained for much of the time. My grandparents actually raised me. Despite her shortcomings she always loved me and was very proud of the things I’ve done and person I’ve become. In many ways she got me in ways that others didn’t. I’ve been through some hell and she was one of the few that checked on me. She never held judgment against me and was always on my side, even if she didn’t fully understand the details or situation.
Some things had happened that made me stop talking to her. Of course, she was too big of a pain in the ass to let that happen, lol. She would talk to me anyways. After some encouragement from my wife, I had recently started the repair process. About a month before I had sent her an message apologizing and forgiving her for her part and asking the same.
If I could wish for something on her behalf I want that breakfast, time, conversations and hugs with her just to reaffirm we were at a good place with each other.
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Bawling. After last year, I feel this is something we should all consider and talk about. I also feel like if we talked about it, we might be able to help each other live without having regrets at the end.
Non-answer but a story:
My grandfather bought a classic car from his son. They had worked on it a bit together and that car meant a lot to him. I remember him trying to get going on fixing it up here and there through the years before it ended up just sitting. He made a couple of comments to me about it once and then he was having trouble with everything going on in life (COVID, his daughter and her kids living with them, grandma's declining health). We made it a weekly thing to spend the day there working on that car and having dinner together. DH and (sometimes) my cousin out working on that car with my grandfather and me inside spending a day with Grandma and cooking dinner. He was a penny pincher when it came to himself so DH and I quietly ordered parts as they were needed and just showed up with them so he wouldn't get stressed over the money being spent on something just for him. We did that for probably a year or more. Cold winter days he and DH would work on his computer or watch videos on how to rebuild the carburetor or whatever. Our house still isn't unpacked because that one day a week was pretty much the only time we had each week to do much outside of work and care for our animals.
The day after my birthday last year, we were all together celebrating my birthday on our usual day to spend together. My grandfather was in a lot of pain, but the doctors all said it was just getting old. I insisted his blood work was BAD and his symptoms were emergency territory. That was the last time I saw him okay. The next day, he went to urgent care. Then emergency surgery and hospice. He and my mom talked a lot as she was the only one allowed in the hospital with him. His one regret in life? He would never get to see that car run. DH and I dropped everything. I had parts overnighted. We were at his house for 10-14 hours a day most of the time. He was able to come home on hospice and could barely stand even with help. I have a picture of him standing leaning in an open hood looking as the final bits were adjusted before attempting to start. I have video of him and grandma grinning and grandma's happy dance sitting on her walker as the car starts up and idles for the first time in decades. We kept pushing. Nothing else mattered except being there to help him and grandma and getting that car to just back down the driveway for him. I posted a desperate plea on Easter Sunday as the wheels didn't fit over the new brakes he had wanted. I picked up a set of irreplaceable wheels/tires taken off a Corvette to see if they would work. I had a line of people driving up with sets of wheels/tires to find some that would work. We ended up with the fronts off our pickup and the rears off another car.
We did it. Just a few days before he passed, he got to go for a ride in his car. Even before then, he told me how special it was that we were out there doing this. After his ride, I told him about the community coming together to find those wheels/tires for him. I almost never saw him cry but there were definite tears as he heard about all the people who cared.
This almost didn't happen. Most of the people in my family didn't care. Some thought he wasn't interested since he had talked about possibly selling it. It had been put off so much that many assumed it was just a tinker thing and unimportant. He very nearly died without ever getting to see that car run because he never spoke up.
Non-answer but a story:
My grandfather bought a classic car from his son. They had worked on it a bit together and that car meant a lot to him. I remember him trying to get going on fixing it up here and there through the years before it ended up just sitting. He made a couple of comments to me about it once and then he was having trouble with everything going on in life (COVID, his daughter and her kids living with them, grandma's declining health). We made it a weekly thing to spend the day there working on that car and having dinner together. DH and (sometimes) my cousin out working on that car with my grandfather and me inside spending a day with Grandma and cooking dinner. He was a penny pincher when it came to himself so DH and I quietly ordered parts as they were needed and just showed up with them so he wouldn't get stressed over the money being spent on something just for him. We did that for probably a year or more. Cold winter days he and DH would work on his computer or watch videos on how to rebuild the carburetor or whatever. Our house still isn't unpacked because that one day a week was pretty much the only time we had each week to do much outside of work and care for our animals.
The day after my birthday last year, we were all together celebrating my birthday on our usual day to spend together. My grandfather was in a lot of pain, but the doctors all said it was just getting old. I insisted his blood work was BAD and his symptoms were emergency territory. That was the last time I saw him okay. The next day, he went to urgent care. Then emergency surgery and hospice. He and my mom talked a lot as she was the only one allowed in the hospital with him. His one regret in life? He would never get to see that car run. DH and I dropped everything. I had parts overnighted. We were at his house for 10-14 hours a day most of the time. He was able to come home on hospice and could barely stand even with help. I have a picture of him standing leaning in an open hood looking as the final bits were adjusted before attempting to start. I have video of him and grandma grinning and grandma's happy dance sitting on her walker as the car starts up and idles for the first time in decades. We kept pushing. Nothing else mattered except being there to help him and grandma and getting that car to just back down the driveway for him. I posted a desperate plea on Easter Sunday as the wheels didn't fit over the new brakes he had wanted. I picked up a set of irreplaceable wheels/tires taken off a Corvette to see if they would work. I had a line of people driving up with sets of wheels/tires to find some that would work. We ended up with the fronts off our pickup and the rears off another car.
We did it. Just a few days before he passed, he got to go for a ride in his car. Even before then, he told me how special it was that we were out there doing this. After his ride, I told him about the community coming together to find those wheels/tires for him. I almost never saw him cry but there were definite tears as he heard about all the people who cared.
This almost didn't happen. Most of the people in my family didn't care. Some thought he wasn't interested since he had talked about possibly selling it. It had been put off so much that many assumed it was just a tinker thing and unimportant. He very nearly died without ever getting to see that car run because he never spoke up.
Rons Wolfe
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What a beautiful story! <3
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Not at all. In fact that is my hope too. And FWIW I think it's more kind to the ones left behind not to watch us suffer so it is not as selfish a wish as you might think. We need to be more humane as a country (only speaking for the USA) and let people die with dignity
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I am so sorry for your loss @sledge
The loss of a parent is traumatic
And you are not alone. It seems mother child relationships are fraught with challenges
She knew you loved her and she loved you. In the end that is what counts. In the end that is all any of us really have that is worth having... Being loved and being able to love
Gentle hugs to you
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Thank you for sharing this @TooPatient
I remember you talking about your dear grandfather
You had a special bond
Elizabeth35
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Begonia
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I'd like some loving tea breaks with my husband and sons, some sunny days watching the birds and then to drift off to sleep where I meet up with my Mom and meet my grandparents. Ziggy Louise will land on my shoulder and want a head rub.
Afterward I hope my sons live a peaceful and fulfilling life on an earth that is healed and in harmony with humans.
Afterward I hope my sons live a peaceful and fulfilling life on an earth that is healed and in harmony with humans.
Rons Wolfe
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Not at all.
Rons Wolfe
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I got to take this back. I don't want him to go through the pain I went through watching him die. For my last days I just want to not be in pain.
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Daisys and Diamonds
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MMtwo
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Not a new album but by chance do you have AppleTV? In 2020 they released a documentary called Bruce Springsteen’s Letter to You.
You might enjoy if you haven’t already seen it.
A tribute to The E Street Band, rock ‘n’ roll, and the way music has shaped Bruce Springsteen’s life, this documentary captures Bruce reflecting on love and loss while recording with his full band live in the studio for the first time since Born in the U.S.A.
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Daisys and Diamonds
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Not a new album but by chance do you have AppleTV? In 2020 they released a documentary called Bruce Springsteen’s Letter to You.
You might enjoy if you haven’t already seen it.
A tribute to The E Street Band, rock ‘n’ roll, and the way music has shaped Bruce Springsteen’s life, this documentary captures Bruce reflecting on love and loss while recording with his full band live in the studio for the first time since Born in the U.S.A.
yes
but thank you
i signed up for apple tv for a month so i could watch it when it came out
i wish they had just put it out as a delux version with the record - like they did back with working on a a dream in 2012
there is a new record out now that he is touring behind- as soul covers record but lucky a few letter to you songs are getting included as that album was just lovely
Past, Present, Future: The Meaning of Three-Stone Engagement Rings
Past, Present, Future: The Meaning of Three-Stone Engagement Rings - 04/14
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