Would you tell the truth if someone show you a fake..

[Dancing Fire]

diamond ring? I mean an obvious fake...

A guy showed me his watch (a gift from his brother) and asked me if I thought it was real, but it was an obvious fake...would you tell him/her the truth ?..

 

[madelise]

And THEY thought it was real? No, I'd keep my mouth trap shut, an tell them, "congratulations!"

 

[OreoRosies86]

No, because I'm not a professional and wouldn't feel qualified to say "You have a fake", and I would also not want to cause any problems between them and whoever gifted them the item. If they are that concerned they can go to a jeweler.

 

[aljdewey]

My response would be "that's really best answered by taking it to a professional jeweler. Anything else is just speculative."

 

[MissGotRocks]

My response would be "that's really best answered by taking it to a professional jeweler. Anything else is just speculative."

I have to agree with Alj. This is an honest answer and also the most helpful. Directing them to a professional is the best course - let the jeweler let them down and salvage the friendship.

 

[Karl_K]

My response would be "that's really best answered by taking it to a professional jeweler. Anything else is just speculative."

ditto!

 

[Trekkie]

Depends on the situation. A friend once showed off with a "2ct diamond set in platinum" that he had bought his wife. It was actually a cheap cz set in silver. Initially I was very polite, just smiled and said, "that's nice".

He harped on about it for months, and I said nothing. Then I received my engagement ring - much, much smaller and set in palladium. He made the mistake of mocking it, so I responded by saying that at least mine's real...

He made up some story about me only seeing the replica because his insurance premium would go through the roof if his wife wore it everyday. I just smiled and said "uh huh". His story became more and more convoluted... Haven't seen him, or the fake, in months.

 

[madelise]

Depends on the situation. A friend once showed off with a "2ct diamond set in platinum" that he had bought his wife. It was actually a cheap cz set in silver. Initially I was very polite, just smiled and said, "that's nice".

He harped on about it for months, and I said nothing. Then I received my engagement ring - much, much smaller and set in palladium. He made the mistake of mocking it, so I responded by saying that at least mine's real...

He made up some story about me only seeing the replica because his insurance premium would go through the roof if his wife wore it everyday. I just smiled and said "uh huh". His story became more and more convoluted... Haven't seen him, or the fake, in months.

 

[WinkHPD]

Way back in the dark ages, before most of you were born (1979), I had a client come in and look at a ring and she loved loved loved it.

He came in to buy the ring and would not spring for the $4,000 diamond she wanted. (Which was a very nice stone in those days, just before the blow off and subsequent crash of diamond prices in the Investment craze.) He wanted me to put in a CZ and I refused, he left.

She brought it in after Christmas and gave it to my appraiser, Richard Homer.

When she got the appraisal she came storming into my office swearing a blue streak about who did I think I was trying to cheat her.

I had no idea what she was talking about until she showed me the appraisal. Her dear "sweet" husband had gone down the street and bought an identical ring to the one I still had on the floor and had the jeweler mount it with a CZ and then he presented it to her in one of my Winfield's jewelry pouches and wrapped in one of my distinctive jewelry gift boxes.

When she brought it in, I never saw it, it went straight to Richard who properly identified it and wrote the appraisal.

When I showed her the original ring she was HOT! She whipped out his credit card and bought a $10,000 diamond on the spot.

A month later he called and threatened never to do business with me again if I did not reverse the charge. I laughed and never talked with him again. 6 months later she came by to say good bye as she had divorced him and was leaving the Idaho to get away from him.

Only buy the lady a fake with full knowledge on her part, bad things tend to happen when you try to put one over!

Wink

 

[isaku5]

That is one of the best 'diamond stories' I've ever heard!!! The truth will out....as the saying goes

A very long time ago DH and I were in Florida and I spied a jewelry store and DH in hot pursuit (to prevent me from buying anything). The jeweler had a lovely selection of rings and while I was perusing his beauties, he commented on the lovely ring I was wearing and asked whether he could take a look. A long pause ensued because both DH and I never wear our 'good jewelry' when we travel (for obvious reasons)

Anyway, I thought what harm could it do and passed it over. He gave it a thorough loupe view and announced that it was indeed a very nice ring. I've admired that man ever since as he was kind enough not to 'out' DH jut in case he didn't know the truth.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

That is a great story, Wink! I would have left the dishonest husband,too! He sounds like a real gem!

Like others have said, DF, I would recommend an AD of that brand of watch so they can hear it from them.

 

[AprilBaby]

Nope, wouldn't tell. Everyone has a reason for why they do things.

 

[kenny]

diamond ring? I mean an obvious fake...

A guy showed me his watch (a gift from his brother) and asked me if I thought it was real, but it was an obvious fake...would you tell him/her the truth ?..

If a person asks my opinion regarding whether it's fake I'd definitely offer my honest opinion.
I might preface my reply with, "Do you really want my honest opinion?".

By asking for my opinion on its authenticity the asker relinquishes any right to expectation that you won't 'hurt their feelings'.
By asking they are telling you to set aside the social convention of only saying 'nice' things.

If it looks fake and I say so and they get offended, that's their passive-aggresive game-playing issue to work through, if ever.

Now, if a person just showed me their diamond or watch and asked for comments (without mentioning the fake issue) I'd keep my opinion to myself regarding its authenticity.
I do have good manners.

 

[missy]

diamond ring? I mean an obvious fake...

A guy showed me his watch (a gift from his brother) and asked me if I thought it was real, but it was an obvious fake...would you tell him/her the truth ?..

I am going to take a different view here. Since he is asking you specifically if this is a fake and you are sure it is I would tell him. He obviously wants to know and you obviously know it isn't the watch he thinks it is. When I ask someone a question and they know the answer I want the true answer and not a passing the buck sort of scenario or a diplomatic answer. I want truth. Otherwise I wouldn't be asking.

 

[kenny]

FWIW, my MIL recently handed me a little box of her jewelry to examine.
She knows I have more knowledge than the average joe.

I cleaned and louped it all and separated it into two piles, fake and real.
I added the caveat that the real stuff is only possibly-real because of my limited expertise.

She didn't get her feelings hurt at all and was very appreciative.

 

[rockhoundofficiando]

no, unless I felt my friend was being duped. Other than that, I'd assume she/he felt that they "needed" the lie.
edited to add, if the person actually asked me my opinion than yes, I would be honest, if I thought it fake, I would say so.

 

[jaysonsmom]

One coworker recently got engaged with a deep pink (almost fushia) gemstone e-ring, about 2 ct (diamond weight equivalent). I'm not an expert in colored gemstones, but I DO know that pink diamonds are EXTREMELY expensive, and with that amount of color saturation, it would cost millions. So, when she started telling people it's a pink diamond e-ring, I blinked several times and said (innocently) with wide eyes: "Wow, I didn't know pink diamonds could be so deep in colour, that must have cost a fortune!"

 

[WinkHPD]

diamond ring? I mean an obvious fake...

A guy showed me his watch (a gift from his brother) and asked me if I thought it was real, but it was an obvious fake...would you tell him/her the truth ?..

If a person asks my opinion regarding whether it's fake I'd definitely offer my honest opinion.
I might preface my reply with, "Do you really want my honest opinion?".

By asking for my opinion on its authenticity the asker relinquishes any right to expectation that you won't 'hurt their feelings'.
By asking they are telling you to set aside the social convention of only saying 'nice' things.

If it looks fake and I say so and they get offended, that's their passive-aggresive game-playing issue to work through, if ever.

Now, if a person just showed me their diamond or watch and asked for comments (without mentioning the fake issue) I'd keep my opinion to myself regarding its authenticity.
I do have good manners.

I have played this game too Kenny. When my wife and I first came back to Boise we had another couple over for dinner and cards at my mom and dad's house. A couple that were friends of mom and dad came by too.

The lady kept bugging me to appraise her diamond. I kept telling her that I did not have the proper equipment with me and would need to inspect it properly to give her a good value. She kept nagging that I was just graduated from GIA and must have learned something. After about an hour of badgering I gave in and said I would take a good look at it and give her a guess.

This was back about Jan or early Feb of 1976, as we moved into our own house around the middle of Feb. I looked at the ring, saw some fairly obvious eye visible inclusions and some yellowish body color. Looks to be an I-J I1 of about 3cts. I am guessing that it should retail in the $10,000 range, but I could probably get one for you at no more than $7 to $8,000.

Oh she was HOT. "This came from Zells in Portland and they are one of the finest stores in the Northwest and this diamond was worth $30,000."

Of course as a young firebrand I responded in kind that I did not care one hoot who Zell Brothers were, but they were outlandishly priced and how many diamonds like the one she was wearing did she want for $10k, or would she rather I charged her $15k so she could think I was of higher quality.

It deteriorated from there. By the time the lady left she was madder than hell, and I do not believe that even today she has forgiven me. My mother was HOT that I was so rude to her friend, my dad was in deep poo poo because he could not stop laughing about it and my wife was pretty cranky with the lady for not liking me to tell her the truth. Her poor husband just stood there and quietly tried to calm her down, to no avail. My friends just sat there with their jaws on the table for several minutes and then suggested we go somewhere for drinks since it was obvious that it was not going to get any better at mom's house.

My mom and dad have long since passed away, as has the lady'd husband who was a very kind man with whom I got along nicely. She was always a little snarky with me and never got over the opinion that I do not know my hat from a hole in the ground when it comes to just about anything, especially jewelry. We rarely speak and then only pretend to be civil with one another.

So to answer the original question, NO WAY IN A HOT DRY PLACE do I give opinions without the tools of my trade available for a full viewing and inspection. In only a little less two more years it will be 40 years since I learned my lesson about that. Come to me in my office and ask away and I will tell you what you want to know, like it or not. When we are in MY HOUSE we play by my rules and for some reason, even the folks that did not like my disclosure of unfortunate facts never took it personally.

Good Gravy, hard to believe it has been that long. I have not remembered that night for years. Hope I can forget it again for another many years, not one of my better memories.

Wink

 

[Gypsy]

For most people I'd tell them that a jeweler would be best qualified to help them, and then I'd recommend a good place to take it to.

There was a girl several years ago who got engaged at work. I didn't have a loupe then, and didn't know jewelry as well as I do now. But I suspected that the center stone was not real, and that she didn't know. But her fiance had "taken care of everything for her, even the insurance and the appraisal" and wasn't that lovely? I suspected that he did all of that so she wouldn't find out what she really had. It put me in an uncomfortable position. I didn't say anything about my suspicions, but I did tell her that pave (the setting was pave) was fragile and that she should go to a good local jeweler (and I recommended one) every few months for a cleaning and that while she was there she should ask them to inspect the stone for damage or wear.

I left the company soon after, and we weren't close, so I don't know what happened. But do think that something was off about the stone, and I hoped that a good jeweler would find a way to tell her so tactfully. I've always wondered though... but it's not like I could have called her and said, "hey, did you ever find out if your rock was real or not?"

 

[kenny]

Great memory, Wink.
Pardon my French, but I say, The Hell with that bitch!
She's got problems.
You don't.
What happened is 110% her fault and you did nothing wrong since she insisted on your honest opinion.
Who cares if she's upset that the truth she asked for and bursts her false bubble and exposed her ignorance and gullibility?
She soiled her own diaper, so let her stew in it.
I think you helped that woman WAY more than you hurt her.

That said, if I was in the industry I'd modify my position and not offer my professional services for free in such a situation.

 

[WinkHPD]

I agree Kenny, but the real problem is that she was, and remained a good friend of my mother's until mom's death. I was living for a couple of months in my folk's house while my wife of now more than forty years looked for our own house. It was really wrong of me to have allowed it to get out of hand and to respond in kind while a guest at my mom's house.

I think that is what I regret the most.

Wink

 

[kenny]

I can understand that.

Live and learn.

 

[dk168]

If peeps do not like my views and opinions, then they should not have asked for them in the first place, IMHO.

DK

 

[KaeKae]

Would I tell the truth if some one showed me a stone that had what I thought was a fake stone in it? Oh, HECK NO! I would have to assume that she or he either 1) knows it's fake and hopes no one else will or 2) doesn't know it's fake and is being duped by the one who gave it as a gift. I'm not going to be the bearer of that bad news.

Just like, years ago, I colleague happily gushed over her brand new, and lovely ring, "I'm so excited he got me a carat stone!" In that case, I was certain it was far from a carat. Maybe 1/2 carat. He might have been included the pave side stones, for total weight, but even that would have been stretching it. I just left that piece of info out, and truthfully told her how happy I was for her and that the ring was beautiful on her hand.

 

[Dancing Fire]

That is one of the best 'diamond stories' I've ever heard!!! The truth will out....as the saying goes

A very long time ago DH and I were in Florida and I spied a jewelry store and DH in hot pursuit (to prevent me from buying anything). The jeweler had a lovely selection of rings and while I was perusing his beauties, he commented on the lovely ring I was wearing and asked whether he could take a look. A long pause ensued because both DH and I never wear our 'good jewelry' when we travel (for obvious reasons)

Anyway, I thought what harm could it do and passed it over. He gave it a thorough loupe view and announced that it was indeed a very nice ring. I've admired that man ever since as he was kind enough not to 'out' DH jut in case he didn't know the truth.

I would have yelled out loud ...this is a DUD!...

 

[luv2sparkle]

I had a very good friend who showed me a ring and said it was a pink tourmaline and that her husband had bought it at a jewelry store in her town. It was very obviously pink ice cz, not tourmaline and maybe silver, if that. I didn't say anything about it, but was really surprised that she would try to pull that one over on me. I felt it was just in such poor taste to tell that lie. It was one of many things that happened on a girls weekend that should have been a blast. Not so much. Haven't really spoken to her since.

 

[kenny]

I had a very good friend who showed me a ring and said it was a pink tourmaline and that her husband had bought it at a jewelry store in her town. It was very obviously pink ice cz, not tourmaline and maybe silver, if that. I didn't say anything about it, but was really surprised that she would try to pull that one over on me. I felt it was just in such poor taste to tell that lie. It was one of many things that happened on a girls weekend that should have been a blast. Not so much. Haven't really spoken to her since.

Maybe she doesn't know as much as you and was just repeating what her husband told her and you (apparently) ended a 'very good' friendship unfairly.
I hope there's more to the story than what you posted.

 

[arkieb1]

I think it depends on the situation, if the person thinks they have a real diamond and it's obviously not and they are happy with it then it is probably not my place to ruin the illusion. If they ask if I like the ring then I'd say it's pretty and leave it at that. If they ask me if I think it is a fake and they want an honest opinion I'd give them one but I'd also say that they would be best to take it to a registered appraiser and be sure. My mother handed me a box of things from a now dead relative and asked me what was real and fake and I gave her my opinion she didn't mind one way or the other.

If someone has no idea what they have or are trying to deceive their friends, workmates or family members into thinking they have something they can't really afford then the whole situation is fraught if you give an opinion...

 

[LLJsmom]

Way back in the dark ages, before most of you were born (1979), I had a client come in and look at a ring and she loved loved loved it.

He came in to buy the ring and would not spring for the $4,000 diamond she wanted. (Which was a very nice stone in those days, just before the blow off and subsequent crash of diamond prices in the Investment craze.) He wanted me to put in a CZ and I refused, he left.

She brought it in after Christmas and gave it to my appraiser, Richard Homer.

When she got the appraisal she came storming into my office swearing a blue streak about who did I think I was trying to cheat her.

I had no idea what she was talking about until she showed me the appraisal. Her dear "sweet" husband had gone down the street and bought an identical ring to the one I still had on the floor and had the jeweler mount it with a CZ and then he presented it to her in one of my Winfield's jewelry pouches and wrapped in one of my distinctive jewelry gift boxes.

When she brought it in, I never saw it, it went straight to Richard who properly identified it and wrote the appraisal.

When I showed her the original ring she was HOT! She whipped out his credit card and bought a $10,000 diamond on the spot.

A month later he called and threatened never to do business with me again if I did not reverse the charge. I laughed and never talked with him again. 6 months later she came by to say good bye as she had divorced him and was leaving the Idaho to get away from him.

Only buy the lady a fake with full knowledge on her part, bad things tend to happen when you try to put one over!

Wink

AWESOME STORY!! thanks for sharing Wink.

 

[LLJsmom]

Honestly for me it depends on the situation. I know I'm not qualified but if it was a very good friend or close relative, I would consider saying something. Recommending that they go to a respected jeweler is a great idea. If the situations were reversed I know I would want someone to tell me.