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Would you keep this stone?

Decision_Decisions

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Apr 29, 2016
Messages
387
I have a lovely 1.29 ct K, VS2 round stone within PS parameters. It's gorgeous, I can't imagine it sparkling more. However, it's already my 3rd stone and even after I first got it I wished it was bigger. I wish I was content with it but that feeling has stayed through 3 stones and almost 15 years of marriage.

Since I've already upgraded this stone through a local jeweler we've way overpaid for it. I've gotten a few quotes on it and the ranges are coming back around 35-45% of what I paid (so realistically maybe 40%?). So like a 60% loss.

And I'm just trying to determine if that's worth the loss. Let's say I'd like a stone from WF for additional future upgrade options. I'd have to pay in again about what I would lose on this stone just to get around what I currently have! I know my stone is not an ACA but I was told by WF that it would qualify as their Expert Selection line based on it's parameters. So I might not even notice much of a difference.

If I sold this stone now with my current budget I could probably upgrade to a similar stone soon (maybe around 20 pts bigger and maybe one color grade better) so while there wouldn't be much difference I would be in with an upgradable vendor. Or I can keep wearing it and keep saving for 5 more years. If I keep this stone I would probably eventually set it in a pendant. I don't need a pendant at all, I currently have a 0.5 ct stone (not PS quality) but even if I got a new pendant I would likely only go to about 70-80 pts. I would not buy a 1.3 pendant. I can't see myself doing anything else with the stone.

The other route is keep this stone, buy an ACA for a pendant now, and upgrade it at our 20th. Then at that time I would take the 1.29 and set that as a pendant. But it's a K and my studs are F/G so that would likely bother me and I probably wouldn't wear them together. Plus life is short and my hands aren't getting any less wrinkly and I would love to enjoy a new stone now.

I know it's totally personal preference, but if this were your situation, would you keep this stone or take the loss?

Oh how I wished we had bought an ACA 15 years ago ...
 
Joined
Sep 11, 2013
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2,496
Personally I wouldn't keep putting more $ into it if I didn't love it. Maybe try selling it privately first to see if you could recoup a bit more $?
 

nala

Ideal_Rock
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Oct 23, 2011
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Can you upgrade with your current jeweler? Why do you say you overpaid for it if it’s a beautiful stone?
 

Decision_Decisions

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Apr 29, 2016
Messages
387
Can you upgrade with your current jeweler? Why do you say you overpaid for it if it’s a beautiful stone?

I wouldn't work with my current jeweler again. He's shady and I only went with him last time because I didn't really know how to sell a stone then. I got lucky that he presented me with a stone with great angles, he himself didn't know (or pretended not to know) much about cut and kept showing me shallow stones that he thought were so great because they faced up big.

It is beautiful, but in total I've put in about 30% more than (non-branded) retail even for such a well cut stone, which makes any loss that much larger.
 

nala

Ideal_Rock
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Oct 23, 2011
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I would try to sell the stone myself and start fresh. It sounds like you will always want to upgrade so you might as well accept that and start the process. You mention that you will go up only .20 but that is a start and I think it will be noticeable.
 

Kim N

Ideal_Rock
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Oct 6, 2005
Messages
6,389
Since your stone has proportions within PS parameters, I think it would be pretty easy to sell in Pre-loved. I would list it there and then buy an ACA.
 

chamois

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 15, 2008
Messages
586
I also would try to sell your stone, or trade it in with Whiteflash or High Performance Diamonds. I did this and have not regretted doing so. Since my trade in I have upgraded and hope to so again in the near future.

You have to be happy with what you decide and know you will have no regrets.

Good luck.
 

tyty333

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Dec 17, 2008
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27,198
I agree with the others that say give it a go at selling yourself.

The going rate (I looked at JA and another unmentionable website) and it looks like retail on a stone like yours would be
$4500-$5000 or so. You could probably start at 30% off which would put you around $3150-$3500. Not sure if this info helps.
(PSers speak up if you think she can get better. I dont want to mislead @Decision_Decisions )

Of course, you can ask whatever you want. You might be able to find someone looking for a little bit of savings. Or, start higher
and keep reducing until you get a buyer (or it just gets too low for you to stomach).

Good luck @Decision_Decisions ...I hope you are on the path to a larger stone real soon!
 

Kim N

Ideal_Rock
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Oct 6, 2005
Messages
6,389
The going rate (I looked at JA and another unmentionable website) and it looks like retail on a stone like yours would be $4500-$5000 or so.

I saw one option up to $5440, and there's an ACA at $6000 for reference (since WF said it would qualify as an Expert Selection).
 

Decision_Decisions

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Apr 29, 2016
Messages
387
Thanks everyone! I have thought about selling myself but since I haven't done that before it does feel more difficult than just finding someone to take it. Maybe I will give it a go with some smaller pieces first to feel out the process on the preloved forum.

I have talked to both HPD and WF. HPD would have to find a 3rd party to buy it. They gave me an estimate but I haven't gotten an update yet. The estimate from WF was slightly higher than HPD, but I think a trade up would be contingent on them being able to use the stone in one of their own lines, so it would require unmounting so they can take performance images. So I haven't decided yet if I want to unmount if I might not accept the offer. All shipping would be my responsibility and they made it very clear they may not be able to make an offer at all.

Since I embarrassingly have so much invested in this stone even the absolute best case on preloved would still be a sizable loss. But it is what it is I suppose, that value is already lost no matter how I look at it.
 

MissGotRocks

Super_Ideal_Rock
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It wouldn’t cost you anything to list on Loupe Troop and post a listing in preloved here with a link to the Loupe Troop listing. Does the diamond have an AGS or GIA cert? It would certainly make it easier to sell. You won’t get what you paid for it but you could possibly walk away with something to use toward a new diamond.
 

Decision_Decisions

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Apr 29, 2016
Messages
387
It wouldn’t cost you anything to list on Loupe Troop and post a listing in preloved here with a link to the Loupe Troop listing. Does the diamond have an AGS or GIA cert? It would certainly make it easier to sell. You won’t get what you paid for it but you could possibly walk away with something to use toward a new diamond.

Yes, it has a GIA cert. If I try to sell I'll have to learn how to take good pictures so I can capture the arrows and the fire. It really is a gorgeous stone.
 

MissGotRocks

Super_Ideal_Rock
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16,272
Yes, it has a GIA cert. If I try to sell I'll have to learn how to take good pictures so I can capture the arrows and the fire. It really is a gorgeous stone.

Having a GIA cert for the diamond is a plus! You would want to include a picture of it in your listing.
It is hard to say whether or not you should keep the diamond or try trading it with WF. Just depends on how much you are willing to spend to move up to an ACA. It can be a tough decision and ultimately depends on your finances and how much you want a super ideal diamond. I did it as the opportunity presented itself and I was willing to pay the price. I have upgraded once with them already and have never regretted my decision to take the plunge. I just can’t encourage someone to do the same as I can’t know if it is the right choice for you. I do wish you all the best in your decision making though!
 

Decision_Decisions

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Apr 29, 2016
Messages
387
Having a GIA cert for the diamond is a plus! You would want to include a picture of it in your listing.
It is hard to say whether or not you should keep the diamond or try trading it with WF. Just depends on how much you are willing to spend to move up to an ACA. It can be a tough decision and ultimately depends on your finances and how much you want a super ideal diamond. I did it as the opportunity presented itself and I was willing to pay the price. I have upgraded once with them already and have never regretted my decision to take the plunge. I just can’t encourage someone to do the same as I can’t know if it is the right choice for you. I do wish you all the best in your decision making though!

Thank you! I really think it might be something I would enjoy, and I'm obviously not very sentimental as this is already my 3rd stone. I kind of like the idea of throwing some money towards my stone for every milestone anniversary or the like. I just have to take the hit this first time and then it should be much easier!
 

MissGotRocks

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Thank you! I really think it might be something I would enjoy, and I'm obviously not very sentimental as this is already my 3rd stone. I kind of like the idea of throwing some money towards my stone for every milestone anniversary or the like. I just have to take the hit this first time and then it should be much easier!

That is correct! The first hit is definitely the hardest but if it is something you really want and can see your way clear to do, it can be so satisfying!
 

nala

Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Oct 23, 2011
Messages
7,045
Having a GIA cert for the diamond is a plus! You would want to include a picture of it in your listing.
It is hard to say whether or not you should keep the diamond or try trading it with WF. Just depends on how much you are willing to spend to move up to an ACA. It can be a tough decision and ultimately depends on your finances and how much you want a super ideal diamond. I did it as the opportunity presented itself and I was willing to pay the price. I have upgraded once with them already and have never regretted my decision to take the plunge. I just can’t encourage someone to do the same as I can’t know if it is the right choice for you. I do wish you all the best in your decision making though!

This! I would also ask myself—when will I finally stop upgrading? What amount of money will I consider unreasonable. And if that amount doesn’t yield a much bigger upgrade than what you currently have—consider that too.
I was in your shoes at some point. Just as frustrated as you with my jeweler who didn’t seem to want to believe in ideal stones. It took me many upgrades and Finally—by sheer luck or bc his business grew immensely—I finally have my holy grail at a great price. I’m not saying your jeweler will necessarily evolve, but you never know? Maybe with patience? And one last upgrade with him for your dream size?
 
Last edited:

jp201845

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jun 24, 2018
Messages
560
Yes, it has a GIA cert. If I try to sell I'll have to learn how to take good pictures so I can capture the arrows and the fire. It really is a gorgeous stone.


I dont think capturing the arrows and fire is that important, just take hand shots and what is most important is provide the GIA report. Good luck
 

headlight

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 2, 2003
Messages
3,293
Don’t be embarrassed! And certainly not here, so many of us have been in this situation.
I do think you should try to give it another shot with your jeweler... unless you think you may want to upgrade periodically (and will never be able to be set on a particular diamond). The idea of more spready stones being desirable because they face up larger was a widely held school of thought and your jeweler may be one who ascribed to that mindset, it doesn’t necessarily mean he is a bad jeweler. But you can use the knowledge you’ve gained here to educate him. I think you have to just change your mindset with regard to money lost or overpaying or the like. You paid what you paid for what you wanted at the time. And whatever you may have “lost” in the trade was actually the vehicle that got you into the next stone you wanted without having to start from scratch. I think you need to look at each transaction as it’s own thing and not view this as a cumulative expense. If you held on to a stone for a long enough period, you would recoup what you paid in a trade, but it doesn’t appear you’ve had the stone long enough. If you want something larger, have you considered resetting your diamond in a halo? It really has a huge impact on size.
 

Decision_Decisions

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Apr 29, 2016
Messages
387
I have thought about resetting. My current setting is quite wide and a little mangled from setting 3 different stones in it. It doesn't allow the center stone to be the star. Yet because it's thick it does have some presence that I'm not sure a solitaire would have at this size even though the stone itself may look slightly larger. I have long fingers and I've kinda been dreaming of a solitaire for a change.

A halo is out because the difference in color would bother me. I know warmer melee are possible but I know myself and even with that I know I would constantly see the contrast (not good contrast like with a warm OEC). I have considered some sort of metal halo. It's part of my process of deciding if I throw more money at this stone or start fresh.

Working with the jeweler again is out. He makes me uncomfortable honestly, didn't truly listen to me and made me feel like I was being unreasonable . I don't want to beg for what I want, I'd much rather shop online. And due to his costs of running a store, if I'm going to pay a premium, I'd rather it be with a super ideal vendor.

As far as an eventual stopping point, I don't really know what that would be. I know I'm not one to have a lot of different pieces of jewelry. And jewelry is something I enjoy putting a bit of money into (not really into fashion, shoes, bags, fancy skincare/makeup). So for me it makes sense to "invest" in a great engagement ring stone if it would be my one material thing that brings me a lot of joy.

Thanks again everyone, it's helpful to talk these things through with people that understand.
 

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chamois

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 15, 2008
Messages
586
I have thought about resetting. My current setting is quite wide and a little mangled from setting 3 different stones in it. It doesn't allow the center stone to be the star. Yet because it's thick it does have some presence that I'm not sure a solitaire would have at this size even though the stone itself may look slightly larger. I have long fingers and I've kinda been dreaming of a solitaire for a change.

A halo is out because the difference in color would bother me. I know warmer melee are possible but I know myself and even with that I know I would constantly see the contrast (not good contrast like with a warm OEC). I have considered some sort of metal halo. It's part of my process of deciding if I throw more money at this stone or start fresh.

Working with the jeweler again is out. He makes me uncomfortable honestly, didn't truly listen to me and made me feel like I was being unreasonable . I don't want to beg for what I want, I'd much rather shop online. And due to his costs of running a store, if I'm going to pay a premium, I'd rather it be with a super ideal vendor.

As far as an eventual stopping point, I don't really know what that would be. I know I'm not one to have a lot of different pieces of jewelry. And jewelry is something I enjoy putting a bit of money into (not really into fashion, shoes, bags, fancy skincare/makeup). So for me it makes sense to "invest" in a great engagement ring stone if it would be my one material thing that brings me a lot of joy.

Thanks again everyone, it's helpful to talk these things through with people that understand.

Please come back with an update on what you decide.
 

nala

Ideal_Rock
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Oct 23, 2011
Messages
7,045
I just thought about your original question. Of I really loved my stone—which you do—and it’s such a good size—and if I was only going to recover 40 percent off the cost or less, I would keep it! Definitely! Trust me. You will be happy to have done that. It doesn’t seem like the money you will get will make a huge dent on your new stone and who knows, maybe in the future, your stone will be worth more to you!
 

Decision_Decisions

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Apr 29, 2016
Messages
387
I just thought about your original question. Of I really loved my stone—which you do—and it’s such a good size—and if I was only going to recover 40 percent off the cost or less, I would keep it! Definitely! Trust me. You will be happy to have done that. It doesn’t seem like the money you will get will make a huge dent on your new stone and who knows, maybe in the future, your stone will be worth more to you!

Keeping it is still a consideration as well. I do love the cut but sometimes the color bothers me. Other times I barely notice. And if I don't trade it in now I will not get a new ering stone for my 15th, I would have to push it back because that extra money would help me convince DH to move now!

Ugh, such meaningless considerations in the grand scheme of things, wish I could make up my mind! Obviously my screen name is fitting!
 

nala

Ideal_Rock
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Oct 23, 2011
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7,045
Keeping it is still a consideration as well. I do love the cut but sometimes the color bothers me. Other times I barely notice. And if I don't trade it in now I will not get a new ering stone for my 15th, I would have to push it back because that extra money would help me convince DH to move now!

Ugh, such meaningless considerations in the grand scheme of things, wish I could make up my mind! Obviously my screen name is fitting!

Oh. I see. Then it will obviously make a dent in your upgrade. Good luck if you decide to sell! And don’t fell bad about money lost. We’ve all been there and done that and keep coming back for more, lol. Pretend it’s a car that depreciated in value. Or a boat. Or a high-end purse. The list is endless, as you can see. You are right. In the grand scheme of things, nothing to sweat.
 
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