would you be upset if your parents didn''t split up their fortunes...

[Dancing Fire]

evenly among all your siblings?

in the old fashion chinese culture the eldest son (or sons) would inherit everything from their parents and the daughters would inherit zip.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

My parents have no fortune to split, lol. I expect they''ll be fair with us. Would I be hurt if it all went to my brother? Sure. I''d wonder what I did wrong.

DF, correct me if I''m wrong, but once a daughter is married, she''s more a member of her husband''s family. Therefore she''d (through her husband) inherit his family''s fortune if she were smart enough to marry the oldest son. Is the oldest son responsible for caring for the parents as well?

 

[Cehrabehra]

In my mom''s family the siblings got equal monies and when my mom died (grandfather''s estate was still not settled) the money started coming to me. I think my cousins thought it was unfair but oh well.

In my husband''s family the POOREST kid gets all the property and money (which isn''t much) and the richest gets the bills. I think that''s a buncha bs myself but his parents are already setting themselves up for yet another generation of it. The siblings that have moved back home and never really made anything of themselves are all set up to get the house and money. And honestly I''m okay with that as we really are still better off than them anyway. But I draw the line at getting the debt. NO WAY no how. Uh uh.

 

[tyty333]

Not if I was the one getting it!

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Have you asked this question before Dfire?

I like things to be 100% fair. Just my personality and how I was raised.

 

[partgypsy]

Not that there are any "riches" to inherit but that kind of what happened in my family. My eldest brother is the prodigal son and has by far gotten the most emotional/financial support. I really don't agree with it because it encouraged the wrong behavior; he has never learned to become self-sufficient and all he knows is how to leech. I am determined not to make that same mistake with my children. If there is any inheritance/monetary help with my kids I will make it fair and equal, because in principal that is the only fair thing.

 

[somethingshiny]

There is definitely no "fortune" to receive here! But, I wouldn''t mind if one of my siblings got more money than me. I would assume that there is a debt, a legal issue, something that I may be unaware but that they need money for. If it was just giving more money because of gender, that would bother me purely out of a sexism stand, but if I knew it was the situation and it wasn''t my decision, it wouldn''t matter what I thought. I didn''t make the money, I shouldn''t have a choice on where it goes.

 

[Mara]

i'd be upset if my parents didn't spend all their money having fun and enjoying themselves, rather than leaving it to us! we should be able to take care of ourselves... in theory.

 

[Lynnie]

I think it should be fair, as in all kids getting an equal amount. Unless one of the kids has a gambling/drug addiction, and the $ would knowingly support the ''addiction''. hehe I''ve been watching too much Intervention.

It''s different in the Chinese culture, yes... but those girls know that from the start, right? What happens if there''re no sons? Do the daughters split it? Enlighten me!

Yes, I''d be miffed, too, if one of my parents left me less (not that there''s a whole lot to begin with).

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 9/15/2009 8:19:35 PM
Author: Mara
i''d be upset if my parents didn''t spend all their money having fun and enjoying themselves, rather than leaving it to us! we should be able to take care of ourselves... in theory.

Spot on!!!

 

[Elmorton]

Well, I''m an only child, so I''ll never even have to wonder.

I do think though that my parents plan to give to charity as well, so I''m not really the sole benefactor. And no, that doesn''t bother me.

 

[jstarfireb]

I wouldn't say there's a "fortune" to inherit. But I have one brother, and I would be pretty upset if it all went to him! On the other hand, I have a job and he doesn't, so it would be reasonable to give him a little more.

ETA: There's already been some instances of favoritism in my family. My grandmother had 4 children and 3 grandchildren when she died. She left most to her husband, which is appropriate, but she played favorites with grandchildren and gave some to our cousin, whereas my brother and I got nada. That was a little hurtful, but I didn't make a big deal of it...it was her money and she had the right to do whatever she wanted with it.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 9/15/2009 8:07:17 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
Have you asked this question before Dfire?

I like things to be 100% fair. Just my personality and how I was raised.

Yes, he has posted this before!

 

[loriken214]

First of all, I don''t understand the sense of entitlement. My parents worked hard for what they had and there wasn''t much at the end. My brother and I are going through the estate right now and we will split everything down the middle. Our parents wills weren''t witnessed properly and we had to go to court, this past Wednesday, to prove that we were the only two children of our parents and now we can sell their house, etc. Our parents didn''t say who should get what and we are left to decide between ourselves....thank goodness my brother and I are close and aren''t selfish people.

DH and I do not have children and we will have a sizable estate when we leave this world. We''re in the process of updating our wills and are trying to figure out who will get what. My brother and my nephew will probably get the bulk of our estate, but that still hasn''t been decided yet. We may donate most to charity....who knows.

I didn''t grow up in a family where money was a priority and we worried about who was getting our parents money after they left us.

Lori

 

[cindygenit]

Hmmm I don''t really care about money but I would like my mother''s jewelry since they have a sentimental value to me and I am very very close to my mum.

I have no idea how much money my parents have/earns.

 

[loriken214]

Date: 9/15/2009 8:19:35 PM
Author: Mara
i''d be upset if my parents didn''t spend all their money having fun and enjoying themselves, rather than leaving it to us! we should be able to take care of ourselves... in theory.

Amen!!!

DH''s parents did this and boy was my BIL shocked when he found out what was left after my MIL passed away...FIL passed away before she did. BIL asked "where is the rest of it?" DH was appointed executor for a reason!

Lori

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Date: 9/15/2009 9:28:03 PM
Author: MC

Date: 9/15/2009 8:07:17 PM

Author: Tacori E-ring

Have you asked this question before Dfire?

I like things to be 100% fair. Just my personality and how I was raised.

Yes, he has posted this before!

Thought this sounded familiar

 

[trillionaire]

I wonder if my parents will leave monies evenly...

FH and I don't plan to have kids, and I could see that swaying their decision about how much to leave whom.

 

[lyra]

Date: 9/15/2009 7:23:24 PM
Author:Dancing Fire
evenly among all your siblings?

in the old fashion chinese culture the eldest son (or sons) would inherit everything from their parents and the daughters would inherit zip.

I guess my family believed in the old fashioned Chinese culture because that is how they did it. However, we aren''t Chinese. Oh well. My husband''s parents are very likely to give much more to their only daughter than their 2 sons. That will cause a big feud, but I feel it''s absolutely none of my business or concern. We would split everything, but probably our children will have more than us anyway, I hope.

 

[Lilac]

I think it should be split evenly, but my stepfather has made comments in the past about how more would go to my brother (his son) rather than me. My mother wasn''t happy about that, but as far as I know she still does not have a will.

My father and stepmother would probably split it evenly between me and their 3 children.

I don''t really like talking/thinking about this stuff

 

[Fly Girl]

Generally things are split evenly in our family, but I do know my aunt is planning to leave more to the son that has mowed her lawn, fixed her house, checked in with her every day, etc. etc. while others have done zip. Makes sense to me. It''s her money.

 

[kenny]

I think all inheritance should go to the poor.

Make your own money.

 

[trillionaire]

Date: 9/15/2009 11:05:42 PM
Author: kenny
I think all inheritance should go to the poor.

Make your own money.

One could dream...

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 9/15/2009 9:28:03 PM
Author: MC

Date: 9/15/2009 8:07:17 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
Have you asked this question before Dfire?

I like things to be 100% fair. Just my personality and how I was raised.

Yes, he has posted this before!

sorry for the replay.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 9/15/2009 7:25:54 PM
Author: Hudson_Hawk
My parents have no fortune to split, lol. I expect they''ll be fair with us. Would I be hurt if it all went to my brother? Sure. I''d wonder what I did wrong.

DF, correct me if I''m wrong, but once a daughter is married, she''s more a member of her husband''s family. Therefore she''d (through her husband) inherit his family''s fortune if she were smart enough to marry the oldest son. Is the oldest son responsible for caring for the parents as well?

yep, that''s the old fashion Chinese thinking.

 

[Phoenix]

My parents have no money. Problem solved!

 

[LilyKat]

I wouldn''t care in the least. It''s their money, and I do not believe I have any moral entitlement to it whatsoever.

I agree with Mara that the thing that would make me happiest would be seeing them spend all their money during their life and enjoying themselves to the full.

 

[purrfectpear]

Only child, not a problem. But fortune? You aren''t talking about my parents

 

[Haven]

I like Mara''s idea--they should enjoy it themselves.
Kenny''s is even better--give it to the poor.

To answer your question, though:
I don''t think I would be upset, but who knows, really, until they''re in the situation.
If it was due to a cultural or family custom, then I imagine I wouldn''t be upset as that would fulfill an expectation I already had.
If it was due to the fact that one child is favored over the others because he contributed more to his parents'' lives, then that sounds fair to me, as well.

 

[radiantquest]

I don''t expect any kind of monies when my parents pass as they are irresponsible and refuse to work. In fact, if they think I am going to support them when they physically can no longer work they have another thing coming. I better not be expected to pay their debt either!