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Which would you prefer?

DuckLovingVegan

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 31, 2010
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Would you prefer to 1. know that he/she bought the ring and that it's just a matter or time or 2. Not know that he/she has bought the ring and let it be a suprise. I like to lean toward number one but I know it would totally drive my crazy trying to guess when he's going to pop the question. I talked to SO about picking the ring out together and he said NO because then I'd have a timeline of when he proposed. I told him the proposal would be a suprise but his not hearing it. We discuss what I wanted in the ring and the budget. I told him I had a document on my computer labeled engagement rings with all the detail involving the ring. He started laughing and said was unbelieveable he said who does this. I said lots of girls give their SO hints by emailing them pics of rings I just put it all in one place, LOL. Anyway back on topic I want option number two because then I won't go crazy with trying to figure out when he's going to do it and I would be totally suprised.
 
hmm...I prefer to have helped pick out the ring! But I guess I don't need to know that he bought it...or exactly what it looks like (I would be OK with giving specific guidelines...) obviously I know that he bought it and what it looks like (mostly...haven't seen the pics yet, just CADs) and the waiting is fine for me, to me it will still be a surprise :) and I am not driving myself crazy because I know it will be by the end of regular season baseball. So...whatever works for you!

If you do buy the ring together, I think it is good that you have some sort of 'timeline', because otherwise you could go NUTS...and what is the point of him buying the ring if he isn't going to propose soon anyway?
 
You and I are in the same boat sista! I emailed my SO pics of the ring I want, a few of the same style that I love. He's asked me some questions and I know he's been doing some looking, but I have no knowledge of when he is or if he has already bought the ring. We talked sometime ago about a timeline and that would put it happening around August/September. So that's really all I have to go off of now. I offered to help him actually pick it out and shop with him and he turned that one down fast. He wants that to all be a surprise and won't let me know about the budget. I know his mom is in on it too and she has great taste. So as long as she's involved I know it will be amazing. I actually prefer it this way so I will be really surprised. Congrats to you!
 
I love the idea of not knowing anything, but it's not realistic for me. I wanted to be involved in the ring process, since I pretty much knew exactly what I wanted.

My SO originally planned to just get some ideas from me and then go from there, but I ended up helping pick out everything. I know he has the ring now, and I know that the proposal will be soon, but I don't know exactly when or how.

I'm really glad that we did it this way, but like I said, I could definitely see other couples preferring that everything be a complete surprise.
 
Personally, i would prefer to be involved in the ring process, just so i make sure im happy with it, but i dont want to know details and know he has the ring. That would drive me crazy. I guess you COULD say lucky for me, i know NO details, ecxpect the ring he will choose will be two-toned due to our diffferent choices in jewerly and the fact that it make be worn with anything i wear.
 
If I could have it my way, I think I would prefer to just get a solitaire and have it be a complete surprise. Originally, we were going to do something where I would show him a few rings that I loved, and he would go from there. But, we came across the perfect ring, so now I'm pretty involved in the process. I still won't know when he pulls the trigger on it, but I'm guessing I'll be able to tell.
 
I picked out my diamond and then designed my own ring, and I wouldn't want it any other way. I have very specific taste and I know that my BF would have gotten close but he wouldn't have picked exactly what I chose. Sure I would have been happy, but knowing me I would start to look for new options and then eventually get the ring I wanted. In my mind, it's too large of a purchase to not get exactly right, so I'm willing to live with the torture of knowing he has the ring.

Oh, and let me add that I am in the group of girls with less than romantic bfs. I'm so interested to see what he comes up with, it will definitely be interesting...
 
Cali...im in the group of not romantic guys too, so i know how you feel with wondering what he might come up with
 
I also love the idea of not knowing anything.... in theory. However, because the ring is very important to me (I don't plan on any upgrades etc because I want to forever wear THE ring he proposed with) I was involved in the picking process and I knew when he bought the ring. Looking back on it, I have no regrets because now I'm just worrying about when he'll pop the question, and not if he is going to do a good job on the ring!
 
#1, I would like to know he got the ring and know that it is coming soon enough, HOWEVER, I would rather not know the date, or week. Although the month would be nice.
 
I prefer having everything a surprise and that's the way we're doing it. Even though it drives me crazy not knowing when it's gonna happen or exactly what the ring will look like, I'm more excited than irritated. My BF would have never agreed to me being a part of the process anyway because he loves to surprise me.

Like DuckLovingVegan, I have a folder saved on my computer with diamond and ring info and examples of what I like. He knows it's on there so I'm hoping he'll use it but even if he doesn't I trust him and know he'll get me a beautiful ring. Plus, I've shown him pics online and he likes the same rings as me!
 
If I was able to help with choosing the ring I would be happy to let him decide when to buy it and propose. I would rather not know if he had it or not, as that would ruin the surprise for me.
 
I helped my ff design the ring. He picked out all the stones (but he showed me what he had picked). He knew what shape I wanted but I left the other things (color clarity etc) up to him. I also wanted a pretty basic Tiffany type setting so having it made wasn't a huge deal. No pave or anything to decide upon. I said I either wanted baguette side stones or a 3 stone ring with all ECs. I was pretty much involved in the process up until the ring was shipped. Were going away on Thursday and I know he will propose on the trip but I don't know how or when. I was very involved with the ring and not so involved with the proposal plan and I wouldn't have it any other way :)
 
RhubarbPie said:
I helped my ff design the ring. He picked out all the stones (but he showed me what he had picked). He knew what shape I wanted but I left the other things (color clarity etc) up to him. I also wanted a pretty basic Tiffany type setting so having it made wasn't a huge deal. No pave or anything to decide upon. I said I either wanted baguette side stones or a 3 stone ring with all ECs. I was pretty much involved in the process up until the ring was shipped. Were going away on Thursday and I know he will propose on the trip but I don't know how or when. I was very involved with the ring and not so involved with the proposal plan and I wouldn't have it any other way :)

Um, that's tomorrow!!!! So exciting. We want details. Up to the minute updates lady! Have an amazing time. I won't say congrats until it happens so there won't be any jinxing you. :)
 
We picked out the setting together (or more accurately, I fell in love with a setting a year ago, then we went together to ring shop and I determined that was still my favorite and he was happy to go along) but I left the diamond selection up to him. He says it has been purchased, but he doesn't have it yet (well, at least as of yesterday when I asked!).

In a conversation today he said he was going to propose with a giant treasure hunt and the final stop would be the edge of a cliff where in one hand he had the ring and the other he had a baby and I had to choose. I asked how cute the baby was. Yep, we're sick twisted people.
 
Having previously experienced option 1. I think now I would definitely prefer option 2 - the surprise.
I hated my experience with option 1, I was always anxious, always expecting the moment, always searching for the hiding spot for the ring .. and then when he did propose i thought it could have been better.
DEFINITELY my vote goes to option 2- the surprise (however if it were a surprise, I would hope that he had chosen the diamond preferably round, cushion or princess, and put it in a temporary setting) :twirl:
 
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