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Where to Start?

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verticalhorizon

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 9, 2004
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840
So, I''m a little nervous about not having ANY clue where to start planning for the wedding.

I mean, really where to start. I have checklists and to-do lists from The Knot and stuff, but... really. Starting seems quite daunting.

How did y''all get started? What were the first things you did?
 

fire&ice

Ideal_Rock
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Jul 22, 2002
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7,828
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On 7/15/2004 3:03:14 PM verticalhorizon wrote:

So, I'm a little nervous about not having ANY clue where to start planning for the wedding.

/blockquote>


Let the bride do it.
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Determine who is paying for the wedding, approximate budget & discuss with all parties involved (her parents in particular as the brides family usually have a vision - best to try to follow it) what type of wedding you want.

That said, the first thing is prioritize what needs to be done the farthest out. Venue is usually the hardest to book. If you have a specific venue in mind, then that may determine what your date is. If not, date is usually the first thing to be determined.

But, not to put the cart before the horse - you need to make up your minds *when* (what time frame) you are looking at. 6 months, 1 year, tomorrow, maybe when you are 35.
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Like anything, getting the ball rolling is the hardest part.

I fly by the seat of my pants. But, hubby responds very well to spread sheets. Whatever works for you to plan.

Good luck.
 

foundnemo

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Apr 27, 2004
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124
Wow, VH, you are really a hands-on groom!
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I was really overwhelmed when I first got engaged. But now that I think we've found our site I think it gets much easier and the big picture is clearer.

First though, what is your budget? Half of that will go towards the food/ceremony/reception site. Think of what kind of wedding you'd like to have, calculate the rough number of guests, and set a date (ours was flexible so we can get our site).

For us, we'd like about 100 people, outdoors, with oceanview. Our budget was XX so we looked for sites that is X (get it--half of XX
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).

We will book our site soon after we visit them, and then we'll start interviewing the other "biggies" (photographer, videographer, dj, florist).

In the meantime, I have spreadsheets with each category.

It's like high school projects, first gather all the info and then organize them into sections.

The Knot has been helpful with referrals and local vendor costs info.

HTH!
 

verticalhorizon

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 9, 2004
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840
So far, we have the SEASON (FALL) and basic GEOGRAPHIC location. That's it.

It's hard to extrapolate a whole lot from that!
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I'm hoping that it will be much less stressful once we have the site booked. Date and place are big ??? question marks and nothing can be done without that.

BTW, isn't it good that I'm involved. A sign to come, hopefully, during child rearing?!
 

researcher

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 27, 2004
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2,460
The first place to start IMO is to consider what your budget is and the TYPE of wedding you want. Do you want a formal wedding in a church? Do you want a more informal outdoor wedding? What places are special to the two of you? Often times you'll find that you can only do the ceremony at one place, or that the site offers package deals only (which, trust me, can be a blessing in disguise when they have good caterers and florists on their team) so you need to know what your options are at each location. Good luck!
 

foundnemo

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Apr 27, 2004
Messages
124
Yeah, site is the big thing.

Originally we (okay, "I") wanted:

1. Saturday
2. Oceanview
3. Evening
4. MMYY (date)

But now because of the site that we/I want and of our budget, we got 1 & 2 but changed 3 & 4. Since we're having outdoor by the ocean, we chose our date by picking a Saturday in the warmer months. Oh and that it's an "auspicious" day to get married according to Chinese calendar. (For my mom...)

It's kinda like the 4Cs, if you have a budget limit then you have to sacrifice one thing to get the other that you care the most about!
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It'll definitely be less stressful once you have the site and the date set. Then it'll just be like planning a big party and getting the other key elements to the production.
 

Greg

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jun 9, 2004
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66
I felt the same way a few weeks ago, but once we picked the location everything fell into place fairly painlessly.
 

verticalhorizon

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 9, 2004
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840
We've never been really party people. (Not like Part-ay Peeps, woooo!)

And the good news is that I think we're real flexible on just about everything. We don't have a special date in mind or time or anything. We just want to do as much of it ourselves and have a good time.
 
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