When you don't agree on wedding bands?

[Miss Sparkly]

I'm not a bride to be but figured this area would be the one experiencing my dilemma. I was very lucky to be able to purchase a designer ring that I love that was used as a display piece only. Problem is, DH and I can't agree on a band. He wants me to get the gold, filigree band from the designer and I want to get the eternity band from Brian Gavin with alternating yellow and white diamonds. Price - eternity band will be about $100 more. He just thinks that yellow diamonds in 18k yellow gold would be unnoticeable (I disagree) and that the gap from the slight curve in my ering would look funny therefore justifying the designer's band. I've looked into meshing the two styles together and that would be far over budget Since I'm the one who replaced the ering he bought me (not my cup of tea) I feel like I should go with the band he likes. Thoughts? Thank you!

 

[DearBuddha]

Get the ring YOU want. Trust me. I went with the plain wedding band DH suggested I get, rather than a style i preferred, and three years later it's so not my style that I find little love in my heart for it. Truthfully, I just see it as a ring I wear with my engagement ring as opposed to my wedding band.

Get what you want. You're going to be wearing it everyday for the rest of your life*, so it's important that you really love it.

*unless you upgrade at some point.

 

[ac719]

Get the wedding band you want!
My husband and I have different wedding bands. Mine is a channel set diamond band and his is a black tungsten band. As long as you married that's all that matters, wedding bands shouldn't have to match to show that!

 

[sba771]

Another vote for getting what you want! At first my husband didn't like my band but once he saw it he changed his mind and even if he didn't it was not going to change my mind. I also am not the biggest fan of what he has, but he is the one wearing it and who am I to tell him what to wear. You should be comfortable as you will be wearing it forever.

 

[PetitiePoire]

I think you should get what you want.

Have you tried both styles with your e-ring? Could he go with you to try on both styles and compare? I don't think you would find an alternating yellow/white diamond band, but you may find an eternity, so he could see how they go together... He may also see how much you love the look and then it might not be an issue.

Good luck!

 

[Miss Sparkly]

I haven't yet. I get it on Saturday and am SOOOOO excited to try on bands for styles. I finally feel like a LIW (even though I've been married for over five years) The first proposal was a total surprise and I didn't expect it and the couple attempts at upgrading didn't go so well (Pre PS days....)

 

[PetitiePoire]

yay! You get your ring this Saturday? That's so exciting!

Be sure to post pictures as soon as you get it!!

What does it look like?

 

[kelpie]

Each person should be the decider on their own band since they will be the one to wear it.

 

[LtlFirecracker]

Each person should be the decider on their own band since they will be the one to wear it.

I agree with this. Me and my husband have complexly different wedding bands, but we both picked out the one we wanted. We had them engraved with the same quote to unify them symbolically.

 

[Miss Sparkly]

Each person should be the decider on their own band since they will be the one to wear it.

I agree with this. Me and my husband have complexly different wedding bands, but we both picked out the one we wanted. We had them engraved with the same quote to unify them symbolically.

So true. Picking rings out for each other when we got married was the worst idea, ever. I got a small cathedral solitaire when I really wanted an antique solitaire and I bought him a ring with diamonds not knowing that he found diamonds to be feminine and "not a guys thing". We both ended up trading in our old ring and put in a joint effort to pick new rings this time

 

[CharmyPoo]

Seriously .. get the ring you want. He is not even going to care about it in a few days!

 

[mayerling]

I don't really have any advice, but I just wanted to say that I'm having the same problem. I want a half-eternity or plain platinum band to match my platinum e-ring, but FI is obsessed with plain yellow-gold bands and does not get why rings need to match! He tells me to just wear them on different fingers

 

[Miss Sparkly]

We went shopping together - and found something we both loved! DH even suggested it It's on layway until April since we already mailed out tax check out and that took the disposable income for this and next month Can't wait

 

[PetitiePoire]

That's wonderful!! Did you sneak any pictures of it?

 

[Miss Sparkly]

No. None of the jewelers that I visited allowed photos and two even asked me to please put my phone in my purse while shopping. It seems like the jewelers are too scared of customers taking photos to have the piece copied.

 

[mrswahs]

Really? That's crazy that they wouldn't let you take pictures! I took a ton of pictures at the store when we were out shopping to get input from friends and family. But we had already bought the engagement ring from them so I guess they weren't too concerned.

I can't wait to see the photos when you get the ring!

And Ltlfirecracker-- your set makes me swoon!

 

[shihtzulover]

I'm so glad that you found something that you both love. I'm kind of going through the same thing right now - my fiance and I have discussed our future wedding bands a bit. We kind of wish that they would be very similar (like, we both get plain platinum bands or something), but as of right now, I'm toying with the idea of a platinum band with channel-set princess cut diamonds, *if* I can find one petite enough for me (I love thin bands). My fiance has no desire to wear any diamonds, so he just wants a plain band, with maybe a little design on it or something.

I definitely say that everyone should pick what they love, and not what their significant other thinks. Luckily, I think that we both agree that while it would be nice to have similar wedding bands, it's not the most important thing.

 

[Miss Sparkly]

You could have the inside engraved so those will match Besides, who's going to grab your hands, put them together and see if you match

Oh, and 28 days until I can go pick up my band. EEEEK And then, only 4.5 years until our 10 year anniversary when we'll hold a "real" wedding (we eloped originally)