When it rains it pours :(

[Smurfysmiles]

I was out at that girl''s night out for that contest I won last night with my bff/bridesmaid and we were getting our makeup done and that''s when I get the text: "My car broke down, my fuel line is shot and I need to get towed" from fi. The irony: He FINALLY got a job the day before after looking for about a month. Yeah...a car is required for his job (we''ve both been yo-yoing between jobs for a YEAR). We don''t have any money to fix the car because his warranty is up. Which means he either needs to use my car and drop me off at work every day or find a different job

We really can''t use any more bad news, the wedding is so close and it really seems like God is trying to take a giant poop on both of us, sending more and more bad things our way. We could really use some dust, our spirits are so low right now

This really was our breaking point emotionally and financially

Thanks for the kind thoughts in advance...

 

[dragonfly411]

Smurfy -- I''m sorry! I''m sure everything will work out in the end. Could you not take city transportation?

 

[Smurfysmiles]

i could but i had to go 2 years without a car and now that i just got one i''d rather share with him instead of going back to taking the bus, i couldn''t stand it

 

[Bia]

damn smurf...that really sucks. Car troubles are very inconvenient and super annoying, especially when you don''t have the money to deal with them.

It''s going to get better, but in the meantime, stay strong for eachother. One car is better than no car

 

[Smurfysmiles]

at the least, i haven''t run into any issues with the wedding

 

[sparkly_stars]

no real advice, because the situation sucks. period!
that being said though, at least you have the option of sharing! imagine if you only had the one car? yikes!
situation still sucks!
we had just bought a brand new truck in april and i ended up needing to get a second vehicle. i didn''t want to do credit, so i had to shop around.
maybe after the wedding you guys could buy something?

do what you have to, to make it work and just try not to get stressed! (before our wedding, everything seemed to go wrong...and eventually i said I''M DONE WORRYING ABOUT ANYTHING" and everything following this revelation was better! haha, i just didn''t "care" as much. i was happy!

 

[gwendolyn]

Date: 10/1/2009 11:25:22 AM
Author: Smurfyimproved
i could but i had to go 2 years without a car and now that i just got one i''d rather share with him instead of going back to taking the bus, i couldn''t stand it

Surely sharing the car or taking public transport would be better than turning down a job if finances have been uncertain due to job issues for a year? It would only be temporary, until you had the money to fix the car. It seems like it would be a very foolish idea for him to turn down a job offer because it''d be inconvenient to go back to public transport or sharing the car--surely it would be even worse with just one income and who knows how many more months of him doing more job searches?

Plus, not to be rude, but it sounds like not *every*thing is awful if you won a contest--I''ve never won anything!

 

[Smurfysmiles]

maybe i should try your "not caring" idea. A glass of wine every other day keeps the stress bugs away, my doctor told me that I swear....ok he didn''t but it seems like a good idea lol
I know any wedding money we get will be going towards a washer and dryer, fi told me last night that that money was for us to share together and he didn''t want to spend it all just on something for him. his plan is to put money aside each month with this job and then any money after the washer and dryer (the one we are looking at is like 1300 dollars for the whole set) we will put towards paying the last 5000 on his car so we dont have to worry about that if we try to get him a new car...

eta: just got an email from my dad offering to pay for any repairs which will help a lot, he''s definitely too good to us, i guess i really do owe him his ballroom dance for the father daughter dance

 

[Smurfysmiles]

Date: 10/1/2009 12:05:11 PM
Author: gwendolyn

Date: 10/1/2009 11:25:22 AM

Author: Smurfyimproved

i could but i had to go 2 years without a car and now that i just got one i''d rather share with him instead of going back to taking the bus, i couldn''t stand it

Surely sharing the car or taking public transport would be better than turning down a job if finances have been uncertain due to job issues for a year? It would only be temporary, until you had the money to fix the car. It seems like it would be a very foolish idea for him to turn down a job offer because it''d be inconvenient to go back to public transport or sharing the car--surely it would be even worse with just one income and who knows how many more months of him doing more job searches?

Thanks gwen you win the biw of the day contest, now you cant say youve never won anything

Actually what we would do is he would drop me off at work before he goes to work since we work the same hours and then i would not get mugged on the bus (sorry im not a city girl yet lol, im still scared of everything downtown or that is crowded lol) and this is what he agreed to too just because he''s not comfortable with me taking the bus either :-\ hopefully the money my dad is lending us will be enough and we won''t have to even consider this *crosses fingers*

 

[gwendolyn]

Date: 10/1/2009 12:12:32 PM
Author: Smurfyimproved

Date: 10/1/2009 12:05:11 PM

Author: gwendolyn

Date: 10/1/2009 11:25:22 AM


Author: Smurfyimproved


i could but i had to go 2 years without a car and now that i just got one i'd rather share with him instead of going back to taking the bus, i couldn't stand it

Surely sharing the car or taking public transport would be better than turning down a job if finances have been uncertain due to job issues for a year? It would only be temporary, until you had the money to fix the car. It seems like it would be a very foolish idea for him to turn down a job offer because it'd be inconvenient to go back to public transport or sharing the car--surely it would be even worse with just one income and who knows how many more months of him doing more job searches?

Thanks gwen you win the biw of the day contest, now you cant say youve never won anything


Actually what we would do is he would drop me off at work before he goes to work since we work the same hours and then i would not get mugged on the bus (sorry im not a city girl yet lol, im still scared of everything downtown or that is crowded lol) and this is what he agreed to too just because he's not comfortable with me taking the bus either :- hopefully the money my dad is lending us will be enough and we won't have to even consider this *crosses fingers*

Oooh, I won! I won! I won! *puts on BIW of the day tiara*

 

[sunnyd]

Date: 10/1/2009 12:08:47 PM
Author: Smurfyimproved

eta: just got an email from my dad offering to pay for any repairs which will help a lot, he''s definitely too good to us, i guess i really do owe him his ballroom dance for the father daughter dance

Yes, yes you do.

Sorry that happened, but you are very lucky to still have one car and a generous pops! Smooth sailing here on out!

 

[gwendolyn]

Seriously, though, that''s good that you may not have a problem after all.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

enjoy being biw of the day gwen, at midnight your time is up lol

 

[gwendolyn]

Date: 10/1/2009 12:40:56 PM
Author: Smurfyimproved
enjoy being biw of the day gwen, at midnight your time is up lol

Your midnight or mine?!

 

[Smurfysmiles]

mine, mine lol!
You have 13 hours and 6 minutes left
Ladies, please meet your biw of the day!

 

[gwendolyn]

LOL!!!!! Hahahaha, oh that''s fab!!!

 

[Smurfysmiles]

teeheeteehee
guess who''s not being productive at work haha

 

[princessplease]

I''m sorry! Much dust!

 

[sparkly_stars]

Date: 10/1/2009 12:08:47 PM
Author: Smurfyimproved
maybe i should try your ''not caring'' idea. A glass of wine every other day keeps the stress bugs away, my doctor told me that I swear....ok he didn''t but it seems like a good idea lol

I know any wedding money we get will be going towards a washer and dryer, fi told me last night that that money was for us to share together and he didn''t want to spend it all just on something for him. his plan is to put money aside each month with this job and then any money after the washer and dryer (the one we are looking at is like 1300 dollars for the whole set) we will put towards paying the last 5000 on his car so we dont have to worry about that if we try to get him a new car...


eta: just got an email from my dad offering to pay for any repairs which will help a lot, he''s definitely too good to us, i guess i really do owe him his ballroom dance for the father daughter dance

Yeah, umm.. not caring wasn''t as easy as turning it off though (trust me, I worry about EVERYTHING all the time!)
you''ll have a good time trying not to worry, but eventually you will just step back and relax. (its just in your best interest for it to happen sooner rather then later haha)
re:washer/dryer- have you tried craiglist, or kijiji? i find everything i ever need off those sites, and it saves tons of money (i got my car there too, now that i think about it) on kijiji there''s even a free section, so sometimes people who just don''t have time to deal with selling will give their washer dryer.
There really isn''t an easy way to deal with lack of money...i''m just very resourceful, and refuse not to get what i want! haha.
glass of wine IS a good idea, if you were closer i''d make it alllllllllll better!

 

[Smurfysmiles]

well the one thing we do want to splurge on is the washer dryer, weve had our eyes on a set for about a year now and we never really get anything nice for ourselves (with the exception of the wii which was our wedding present to each other as well as on sale ) but fi is hoping to be able to just trade his car in, dunno why they would want it but i guess we''ll see

btw, he got a new job this afternoon

 

[sparkly_stars]

YAY NEW JOB!!!!!!!!
silver lining to everything

oh, i hear you- we splurged on a new couch...just felt we were always saving on things including couches!

 

[CNYHopeful]

I''m so sorry for this news, Smurfy! Hang in there and I''m sure you can work something out for the next few weeks. It will be stressful in the meantime, but there has to be a way. My car just failed inspection and I have to bring it in for some work tomorrow. We''re talking about getting a new car after the wedding next May, but it is going to be costly over the next couple of months, for sure. Ugh! I can certainly understand the stress. Hang in there, though and know that we''re sending some dust your way!

 

[oddoneout]

So sorry to hear about your bad luck.

 

[purrfectpear]

I''m going to give you some totally unsolicited advice from someone who had made some iffy choices when I was younger.

I know you "want" that washer/dryer set (especially now that they come in cool colors and are front loading, etc.). I really do understand. But...remember that sick feeling in your tummy when the car broke down, or when one of you was unemployed? You need a savings cushion FIRST, wayyyy before the spiffy appliance. Do yourself a really, really big favor and put it off. Start building a savings NOW, not later, not after the appliance treat. NOW. Trust me please. If you had about 4 to 6 months expenses in savings, life''s little surprises would have much less of a gut wrenching, stress producing effect on the both of you. You will sleep so much better at night. The washer/dryer will look like crap in your house the first time some crisis arises and you guys aren''t financially prepared. Save the money first. Buy a second hand set. Set yourself a goal to have a new washer and dryer for Xmas 2010.

There, I''m off my soapbox, but I really hate to see young couples dig themselves into a hole.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

Date: 10/1/2009 9:09:22 PM
Author: purrfectpear
I''m going to give you some totally unsolicited advice from someone who had made some iffy choices when I was younger.


I know you ''want'' that washer/dryer set (especially now that they come in cool colors and are front loading, etc.). I really do understand. But...remember that sick feeling in your tummy when the car broke down, or when one of you was unemployed? You need a savings cushion FIRST, wayyyy before the spiffy appliance. Do yourself a really, really big favor and put it off. Start building a savings NOW, not later, not after the appliance treat. NOW. Trust me please. If you had about 4 to 6 months expenses in savings, life''s little surprises would have much less of a gut wrenching, stress producing effect on the both of you. You will sleep so much better at night. The washer/dryer will look like crap in your house the first time some crisis arises and you guys aren''t financially prepared. Save the money first. Buy a second hand set. Set yourself a goal to have a new washer and dryer for Xmas 2010.


There, I''m off my soapbox, but I really hate to see young couples dig themselves into a hole.

well if say we get a gift card to sears for the amount of a washer dryer set....do you think we can get it then lol

 

[Haven]

Date: 10/1/2009 9:09:22 PM
Author: purrfectpear
I''m going to give you some totally unsolicited advice from someone who had made some iffy choices when I was younger.

I know you ''want'' that washer/dryer set (especially now that they come in cool colors and are front loading, etc.). I really do understand. But...remember that sick feeling in your tummy when the car broke down, or when one of you was unemployed? You need a savings cushion FIRST, wayyyy before the spiffy appliance. Do yourself a really, really big favor and put it off. Start building a savings NOW, not later, not after the appliance treat. NOW. Trust me please. If you had about 4 to 6 months expenses in savings, life''s little surprises would have much less of a gut wrenching, stress producing effect on the both of you. You will sleep so much better at night. The washer/dryer will look like crap in your house the first time some crisis arises and you guys aren''t financially prepared. Save the money first. Buy a second hand set. Set yourself a goal to have a new washer and dryer for Xmas 2010.

There, I''m off my soapbox, but I really hate to see young couples dig themselves into a hole.

Truer words have never been spoken.

 

[rhbgirl24]

Aww! DUST!