Wedding What''s the silliest thing you argued about?

[SarahLovesJS]

What''s the silliest thing you''ve argued with someone (anyone) about during the wedding planning process? Was it a font color? Cake flavor? What was it? Because while it seems so important, in the end it''s always amusing in my opinion. After it''s all said in done..I personally plan to look back and laugh at the silly things.

 

[winston26]

I came close to a Bridezilla moment in Michael''s when my Mom was trying to put together how we should make the favors. Her comment on ribbon colors: "ack, it don''t matter; who''s gonna notice?", for me: "are you kidding?!?! the ribbon has to match the flower girl dresses!".
Some of these things seem silly but they may have a deeper psychological meaning behind them. At least that''s what I read in a book about the emotional rollercoaster we call "engagement".


p.s. I''m still happy the ribbon matches!
....but now I don''t like the programs she picked out either!

 

[Gypsy]

GREAT thread idea. Orange roses. My florist wanted to use to using a certain type... I wanted another and I could feel myself getting ready to argue with her. Finally I was just like... is ANYONE going to notice? They are pretty roses. I probably won''t even notice and she has to feel comfortable. So I just took a breath, let it out, and gave in. Felt silly I was so invested about the rose type afterward and was very happy I didn''t argue about the issue. It is NOT going to matter.

I will say that I felt like an idiot obsessing about the border color for my invites. Finally I just did a poll, most of the ladies on here said chocolate and I was like, "Yes! It''s over!" And sent the email off to the invite vendor before I could even think about it.

 

[neatfreak]

My MIL. About her insistence that we use the word God in our ceremony. Neither my DH nor I are religious. At all. Sounds funny now...but at the time I thought WW3 might break out! (We didn''t by the way, but we had to sneak it by her!)

 

[diamondfan]

My mom and I fought because she went out and picked bm dresses without me. I had said I wanted black cocktail dresses, and she did find a good one at Neimans that fit all of the different body types of my bm''s and was something the girls would (and did) wear again, but it irked me that she went and decided without me. It is silly because in the end, I am not sure I would have found anything better, and it worked out well, but it just upset me.

 

[luckystar112]

It was with my mom (of course) and it was about rsvp''ing.

We have a wedding website on the knot, and since I was going to put our website on the STDs, I warned her that people might try to rsvp on there instead of sending in the card (there is a rsvp section on our website that I couldn''t remove, and I thought some of our younger guests...FI''s friends...may get confused).

Anyway, for some reason, she took it very badly and started yelling at me about how stupid it is for people to rsvp on the site instead of the normal way. I guess she thought I preffered it or something because she was verbally attacking me and saying I was stupid for allowing it or being associated with any people that would rsvp that way. It''s like she thought I could change it or something! I had to repeatedly be like, "WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? I can''t stop people from thinking that''s how they rsvp!" And everytime I told her that we''ll just periodically check the site, it went through one ear and out the other.

I don''t think she ever truly "got it", even after the argument.

Boy am I glad to be done with her!!!!!

 

[doodle]

diet coke. wasn''t actually wedding related, but i''d been on the wedding warpath all day and was stressed out. my FI and i met up with another couple we''re close friends with, and the girl ordered a diet coke because she''s diabetic. when the waiter brought the drink over, he was teasing us and said it was dr. pepper and they could under no circumstances serve her diet coke because she had ordered a dr. pepper originally (she hadn''t; he was just picking on us because we eat at this restaurant about 4 times a week). i was already wound up, so i immediately was like "she''s diabetic--WHY, pray tell, oh wise one, would she order a freaking dr. pepper?" luckily, her boyfriend made a much bigger ass out of himself than i did about it and in the middle of asking to speak to the manager realized the waiter was teasing us, so the sentence went something like, "since you''re obviously incompetent, i''m going to need to speak to your manager, and--and you''re just toying with my emotions, aren''t you? i''ve always hated you. be gone!" the last part of that was said with a big goofy grin at the waiter, who was by this time doubled over laughing at how uptight we could be about diet coke, haha. that''s what happens when you combine an engaged couple and a pregnant couple with a diabetic mommy-to-be!

 

[Pandora II]

Venue Witch - everything....

The most ridiculous has to be her not wanting us to move the computers and other rubbish out of the beautiful window bays in the main reception room!

Thank goodness she''s now history!

 

[violet02]

I''ve had a few doozies, but the worst was when my friend who was going to officiate the wedding went with me to try out rehearsal dinner restaurants (my FI was busy and it was a weeknight). He had good intentions of course but leaned heavily on me to pick the cheapest place (with the worst food!) and after going to a few places and getting comped quite a few drinks we wound up having the blowout to end all blowouts! I was super made he was being so pushy and the end result of that night was we made it about half way home from Carmel to Mtn View and my FI had to drive down and pick me up, it was that bad! The end result is we''re friends again but we hired an officiant to do the wedding and my friend is an usher instead. I''m relieved about the officiant, I like the idea of the neutral party at this point!

 

[IrishBreakfast]

Considering I am fairly easy going, it was a bit of a surpise to everyone when I pitched an all out tantrum when I went to pick up my veil. They had put the comb WAAAAAY too far forward. I yanked it out of my hair, threw it on the floor and started yelling. Thankfully, I did stop short of stomping on it but only just. I also just about left my now hubby over a disagreement about the english slang word ''nowt'' (which means ''nothing''). That got real ugly. We often joke that we nearly broke up literally over ''nothing''!!!

 

[Courtneylub]

FI''s attire. He says it''s his decision and that I don''t have a say. I completely disagree! He would show up in shorts and flip flops!

He finally understood that I do get a say in it.

 

[Haven]

Date: 5/27/2008 8:37:29 AM
Author: Courtneylub
FI''s attire. He says it''s his decision and that I don''t have a say. I completely disagree! He would show up in shorts and flip flops!

He finally understood that I do get a say in it.

We had a disagreement about attire too, Courtney! My FI didn''t even know what a morning suit was but when he heard the name he said he wasn''t going to wear it. Once he saw a picture he was fine with it, though. It was a silly disagreement.

I had enormous difficulty with the bridesmaid dresses, and that was silly. It was one bridesmaid against the other five, and the one won.

 

[sumbride]

The jr. bridesmaid''s dress and shoes. She was my niece-to-be and was really excited about being in the wedding. So jr. bridesmaid''s parents are divorced and she lives with her mom. Her father, my BIL, lives in Paris. So when it came time to pick a dress for her, I talked with the girl and her mom, and together we all picked out something lovely. The girl was excited, I was happy it was done, and her mom was pleased. Her grandmother (my MIL) was not. In fact she was so upset that she was not consulted on the dress (actually, she wanted to pick it out herself) that she never missed a chance to comment on how inappropriate and ugly the dress (that I approved!) was. She hates the girl''s mother because of the divorce and was very angry at me over the whole thing. I never understood it because who is better to ask about what an 11 year old should wear? Her mother or her grandmother?

So after showing her a picture of the girl in the dress, she became a little bit more complacent, but then she had a new fight. The shoes. All the other girls wore silver shoes but they didn''t go with this dress because of the champagne ruffle at the bottom, so the girl and I decided on blue shoes. It''s been almost 8 months since my wedding and my MIL is still mad that the jr. bridesmaid wore blue shoes. Nobody else cares, and I assure you that they didn''t even notice! The other girls all had full length dresses and you couldn''t even SEE their shoes.

Here''s a photo to prove my point... jr. bridesmaid is standing next to the bridesmaid directly behind me. MIL thought her dress was "inappropriate" for her age.

I think it''s absolutely ridiculous!

 

[NewEnglandLady]

I think the only fight DH and I had about the wedding was over table linens. Stupid table linens. I remember clutching the samples in my left hand while yelling at him in the middle of the cereal aisle in a grocery store while an innocent gentleman was trying to get around us and grab a box of Cheerios.

It was 3 months before the wedding--DH had booked the venue, I''d bought a dress and neither of us had done anything else...in fact, I think I was still considering eloping at that point. DH and I decided it was time to start booking our vendors and I agreed that I''d go see the rental people on my own. Big mistake. Apparently I had not prepared myself for the craziness that is wedding planning. I came home with about a dozen samples of table linens that were all seemingly the same shade of "cranberry". I plopped them on the table when DH got home from work and said "chose one of those shades, I''m clueless". We looked at them, but neither of us knew what to do, so we decided that we''d figure it out on our way to the grocery store.

As we walked into the store I told DH to stop so we could look at them in the dark--I thought maybe they looked different in the dark? I don''t know, my memory is fuzzy now but I believe my reasoning was that our reception was outdoors, at night, and maybe something about them looked different at night. DH shot me a look like I was crazy and for whatever reason it sent me into a tizzy...

Somehow I ended up yelling at him in the cereal aisle about how I''d spent hours looking at stupid table linens for a wedding I''d never wanted to begin with and if a wedding was important to him, he could plan it himself...blah, it was ugly.

At that point I swore to myself that I''d never get frustrated over something so stupid again...and that was the only wedding-related fight we had. We went to all the vendors together after that and actually had a lot of fun laughing at the whole experience. Those samples are still hanging on our fridge.

And the linen people delivered the wrong linens the day of, anyway, which we got a real kick out of. We didn''t care and neither did anybody else!!

 

[anchor31]

We didn''t really argue, but I had a few "

" moments with my mom at the beginning of the planning.

She would say things like "the BM dresses HAVE to be floor length and both identical", "we HAVE to have a high table", "we HAVE to invite all ours aunts and uncles if we invite one of them", "we HAVE to get married in a church", "having an open bar is irresponsible", that sort of thing. I think she was just unaware that things had changed in the last 33 years since her own wedding!

Recently, my brother told me that he''d witnessed one of those disaggreements and told her he thought she should just let me have whatever I want no matter what her opinions are, and she did, which I''m thankful for. Since then, she became my biggest helper in the process. It''s really hard for me to handle her being so sick with chemo and no longer able to help me just weeks before the day.

 

[SarahLovesJS]

This turned out to be a really interesting thread! Well, we''re not too far into planning yet. But so far for us it''s been over things like letterpress v. printed invites. As well as how much to spend on this or what. I''ve had quite a few run-ins with older family members wanting to know how much we''re spending and why.

 

[Blair138]

well I am not engaged yet-which makes this all the more silly-my FF and I started talking about my shower the other day. I will probably only have one large shower and be done with it-my cousin did and that''s how I want it-makes it 10x easier for my family, his, etc...whatever-I told him this and his response was "that''s stupid, more showers=more presents and it will cost more because it would be at a hall/country club". Then I told him he''s an idiot-WE don''t pay so cost doesn''t matter and more showers will = the same amount of presents because we would be inviting the same people just to one event. And then we started arguing outside of Sephora...Finally I got him to shut up by saying "WE''RE NOT EVEN ENGAGED YET!"

men... haha

 

[Haven]

Sumbride--I don''t think I ever saw your wedding pictures, what a beautiful scene! (And a ridiculous fight, ugh. Sorry you had to go through that.) Anyway, I just love that picture, it''s so romantic. Your wedding looks like it was beautiful!

I have to say that this thread is making me feel better about all the little arguments I''ve dealt with during my own wedding planning, so thanks!

 

[doodle]

OH!!! i totally forgot about this one until just now!! one of my bridesmaids is super-opinionated and brutally honest about everything--i''m the same way, so usually we crack each other up and have a grand old time with it because we''re both also mellow enough that it doesn''t matter if one of us has a differing opinion. i''ll call her D. well...my bridesmaids dresses are cornflower blue, and at the suggestion of three of the other bridesmaids, i told them to get silver shoes. that''s it for my part of it--"get cornflower dresses from david''s and silver shoes. get whatever you like. i don''t care as long as you like it, feel comfortable in it, and will dance at the reception!" D calls and with no prelude whatsoever, goes, "silver shoes are really ugly. what about getting shoes dyed cornflower?" i told her that i personally didn''t care what the shoes looked like because i love shoes and almost always notice them, and even i can''t remember the bridesmaids shoes of any wedding i have ever been to with the exception of the one where the bridesmaid lost her shoe walking up the aisle and i had to put it back on her foot (red peep-toes..but that''s a whole other story

), but since three of the other girls wanted silver and had already gotten them, i was sticking with silver. D keeps arguing for cornflower shoes. finally, i tell her, "D, if you want them that badly, get them and don''t match. it''s your feet. quite frankly, i don''t care if you have your butt tattooed cornflower blue and wear blue leather @$$less chaps!!!" i''d like to be able to say that shut her up, but instead, she started picking on me about how stunning her eyes would look if she had her lashes and eyebrows dyed cornflower, too!!!