Whatchathink?

[sputat]

I have been lurking here for the past couple of weeks and this is hands-down, the place to be for diamond-talk.

After being together for 3+ years, my boyfriend finally mentioned "the ring". That was my go signal and push to learn about diamonds. I always considered myself as a plain-round-solitaire kinda gal but when I saw this ring... I went gaga for it.

Yawzah!

When I showed it to him though, he said it didn''t "feel" like an engagement ring. He said it looks like a "fun ring" and would be more appropriate as a milestone birthday kind of ring. Between the both of us, he is the flashier one in the relationship so I was surprised by this.

I would love to hear your opinion if this style is "not good" as an engagement ring... Maybe he has a point.

p.s. By the way, It is not as if this ring is my "dream" engagement ring but it''s just so darn beautiful.

 

[_Sarah_]

I think its beautiful, I love e/w stones! Your engagement ring can be a fun too.

 

[chrono]

That''s definitely an engagement ring to me, just not a traditional one because it''s set East-West and has a halo (circle of diamonds). Very pretty. Some guys, although flashy or like contemporary styles, can get rather traditional when it comes to engagement rings because well, engagements rings are traditionally round solitaires and such. Perhaps, you both can come to a compromise. Do you like the stone because of the shape or the halo? Maybe he doesn''t like the shape and/or the halo?

The first step is to decide the shape that you like best.
Then think about the size (colour & clarity) that is acceptable to you and his wallet. Excellent cut is a given.
Next comes the setting (plain, sidestones, halo, pave, etc.)

 

[mrssalvo]

catherine Zeta Jones''s e-ring is set the exact same way. also, a pricescoper Jasmine had Whiteflash make her e-ring too. I think it''s gorgeous if you love marquises and diamond halo''s. a very stunning, blingy ring. here''s a pic of Jasmine''s ring:

 

[february2003bride]

I think any ring can be an "engagement ring" if you want it to be.

 

[Ellen]

I agree with the above posters. Only consideration might be the wedding band fitting next to/under it. If you search "east west marquise" on here, you should get some helpful info!

 

[neatfreak]

Many men seem to have a more traditional view of what an engagement ring is "supposed" to look like. Mine also thought the halos weren''t as engagementy as a solitaire and said that he would prefer to buy me a halo as a right hand ring someday.

First thing is to go and actually try on a whole bunch of stuff. When it came time to finally buy a ring, I realized that I really loved the halos as RHR, but that I too prefered some sort of more classic solitaire as an ering for myself.

Once you both go and try on a whole bunch of stuff I think you''ll be able to really decide what it is that YOU want and really, that''s the most important part!!!

Best of luck!!!

 

[CrookedRock]

I personally love the ring! I''m all for a unique engagement ring. As much as I love all the rings people post, I see so many that are so much alike! We recently designed a ring (which I am still waiting for!). I found the ring in a jewlery store but it was set with some weird yellow stone, so it was meant to be a cocktail ring. I sat down with the designer and tweaked a few things and put a diamond in it! It is to die for. I am so excited to have something that no one else will. I strongly suggest getting ideas from right hand rings, cocktail rings, anything that catches your eye. I don''t know what your budget is, but you could always take that picture to a good jeweler who can make custom pieces and tweak it a little more so that you both love it!!

 

[FireGoddess]

Yes, tell Jazmine it doesn''t look like an ering!!!

I think if you love the ring and that''s what you want for an ering, you should tell him. You''re the one who will be wearing it.

 

[sputat]

It was actually Jasmine''s ring that made me a believer. I never thought I''d consider a marquise cut until I saw her setting.

I told my boyfriend it would be nice to have a not-your-typical-looking engagement ring. I think he is influenced by e/rings of female co-workers... One even told him that marquise is "circa Dallas" (as in the tv show). Harder for me to convince him now.

We''ll see if he''ll budge. I wish there were rings like this out in the marketplace that I can try on so he can see it''s a beautiful design.

 

[DBM]

particularly if you have long slender fingers i think it''s more visually pleasing to have the marquise going vertically (in the direction of the fingers). Beautiful style though. Of course it goes without saying it''s all about what you enjoy in the end...

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 5/16/2007 6:14:27 PM
Author: DBM
i think it''s more visually pleasing to have the marquise going vertically (in the direction of the fingers)

I disagree strongly ... & believe vertically oriented marquise look infinately more "dated" than horizontally set ones. That''s "DALLAS"-y. East/West is "now". Yet ... geez .. anything''s gonna look dated SOMEtime.

 

[peridot83]

My bf is totally against halos. I've shown him pictures and he always goes what is THAT going around? You probably just need to figure out what it is about the ring he doesn' like:

Is it the shape of the stone (maybe you could do an oval or emerald cut east/west)
Is it the fact that it is east/west?
Is it the halo?

If he was really set on a plain tiffany like round solitaire, it'll take a lot of pushing, but hopefully you can come to some sort of compromise

On what not to get in an engagement ring? I think it totally depends on your motivation and your own attitudes. Pave bands seem really popular right now & halos as well, all thin and dainty. If you get those, will you care 10 years from now when people say ohhh remember that trend?

I think what's great about the ring you liked, is its so unique that no one would ever be able to say I remember when that was popular!! (Unless its an obsessed Pricescoper) Also, obviously a plain band is pretty fail safe.

The rings his coworkers are thinking of are gold bands with the marquise facing north south. Its not just the stone, its the whole STYLE that's dated. This ring is quite independent of that.

 

[sputat]

He doesn''t like anything about this ring *as* an engagement ring. He thinks it''s very pretty and told me this is the kind of design he''ll get for me on my 40th birthday or something... but not as an e/ring.

I was trying to go for the more-bang-for-your-buck angle since a marquise stone is priced differently vs. a round. Plus, with the e/w setting, the diamond just pops. I just wish he would stop asking other people about e/rings and get it straight from the horse''s mouth... mine! LoL

 

[surfgirl]

Well, YOU are the one wearing the ring everyday, not your FI, right? And while it''s lovely that he has an opinion, IMO, the only opinion he should really have is "whatever makes you happy dear.."

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 5/16/2007 8:14:10 PM
Author: surfgirl
Well, YOU are the one wearing the ring everyday, not your FI, right? And while it''s lovely that he has an opinion, IMO, the only opinion he should really have is ''whatever makes you happy dear..''

Hahaha...my thoughts exactly, surfgirl!

Sputat, I think that''s absolutely beautiful for an engagement ring! Jasmine''s ring is definitely one of my favorite rings of all time on PS. I think you just need to tell your boyf ever so sweetly that it ain''t his ring, it''s yours!

Also, maybe have him check out some of the rings in the Show Me The Ring folder that aren''t so typical so he can see that an engagement ring is whatever you want it to be!

 

[Ellen]

Date: 5/16/2007 8:14:10 PM
Author: surfgirl
Well, YOU are the one wearing the ring everyday, not your FI, right? And while it''s lovely that he has an opinion, IMO, the only opinion he should really have is ''whatever makes you happy dear..''

Absloutely.

Because, If you aint happy, ain''t NOBODY happy.

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 5/16/2007 8:52:12 PM
Author: Ellen

Date: 5/16/2007 8:14:10 PM
Author: surfgirl
Well, YOU are the one wearing the ring everyday, not your FI, right? And while it''s lovely that he has an opinion, IMO, the only opinion he should really have is ''whatever makes you happy dear..''

Absloutely.

Because, If you aint happy, ain''t NOBODY happy.

Ain''t that the truth. I think it''s lovely!!!

 

[Ellen]

Date: 5/16/2007 8:55:06 PM
Author: Kaleigh

Date: 5/16/2007 8:52:12 PM
Author: Ellen

Absloutely.

Because, If you aint happy, ain''t NOBODY happy.

Ain''t that the truth. I think it''s lovely!!!

Well, hubby thinks it is. Frankly, I think he exaggerates.

 

[vespergirl]

Hi sputat,

When I got engaged last year, we went through a similar thing. My finace, even though he knew I loved square cuts, only liked RB solitaires. When he was picking them out of the case, he was looking at 2 carat round solitaires, because that''s what his friends'' wives have, and I think he wanted my ring to look like theirs. Even though I love a great RB solitaire (& there are days that I feel like kicking myself for not letting him get me the 2 ct RB solitaire that he picked I was always drawn to asschers and everything else paled in comparison next to the asschers for me.

I think it hit him when he saw the look on my face with an asscher on my hand that it would be ME wearing the ring for the rest of my life, so it should be something that suits me. Plus, if he really didn''t want my feedback, he could have just gone and bought me a ring as a surprise without me having anything to do with it - so the fact that your guy mentioned it before the engagement means that he wants your opinion.

That said, he was set on a solitaire setting, which we plan to upgrade to a 3-stone by adding matching sidestones for a future anniversary (kind of a tradition in these parts). We looked at some halo & more intricate/antiquey settings, which he hated. When I pressed him on it, he said that the engagement diamond should be beautiful enough to stand on its own, because it''s supposed to be a symbol of his love & commitment, etc., etc., and he didn''t want sidestones "upstaging" the diamond. I don''t know if all guys feel that way, but mine did, so maybe yours feels that way too ...

That said, I think the marquise you like is gorgeous. Would he maybe go for an EW set marquise in a solitaire, instead of halo setting? And as far as people saying that marquises are dated, my mom''s engagement ring is a traditionally set 1.5 carat marquise with small side baguettes, that is gorgeous, and she still gets complimented on. A marquise is definitely a classic for an engagement ring, so if you like it, go for it!

 

[kcoursolle]

I think what''s important is what you like because you are going to be wearing it. There aren''t as many rules these days with e-rings as before. Some people wear one ring, some people upgrade over time, some people just wear a wedding band, etc.

 

[sputat]

Thank you for all your input and replies. I was in a semi e/ring funk yesterday night and wanted to discuss it with him one more time when it hit me that I might be "stealing his thunder" if I go on and on about what I want for an e/ring. I'll let the man do his thing and just butt in later on... only if he's really on the wrong track. LoL

Thanks again.

 

[Ellen]

You know best. Let us know what you end up with!

 

[Gypsy]

While I understand an appreciate that you all want your fiances to like your rings and feel good about the symbol of your commitment...please, gently remind them that it will you wearing the ring, and therefore your preferences for halos or marquise are the ones that matter... not random co-workers or strangers.

 

[jaz464]

Sputat, I felt the same way you do. Never wanted a marquise until I saw one set E/W. I also think that tradional marquise rings can look Dallas-era (1980s), especially in YG. Of course, a marquise set N/S with baguettes on the side is competely classic and always will be IMO. Anyway, no my ring is not tradional. But that is why I love it. I get tons of compliments on it, usually with people commenting, "wow, I never liked marquises until I saw yours." I love it and would not want anything different. You will be the one wearing it. Really, your BF should let you choose I think. I wouldn't want to get something he hated but go and try some rings on with him. It may be quite difficult to find an E/W marquise (though I was lucky enough to see my first one in a BB&B) but go to a place that has some loose marquise diamonds. Have them place the stone into a temporary setting just so you can get an idea. I had an old empty princess setting I used to see how mine would look.

Keep in mind, it is hard to find a W-band to fit this style of ring. I wear my w-band on my right hand.

 

[MWG]

I like it!!!!! Get what you want, so you will be happy!!!!!

Congratulations
MWG