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what to keep and what to throw away?

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jewelerman

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Today Ive been hard at work on my day off...cleaning.You know...going through the closets, drawers and old boxes of stuff like books,letters,music,movies and board games...question is...how do you decide on what stays and what goes?Some stuff is easy,but what about things that have memories attatched or items of value that dont get used ofter and are stored for months between uses.What strategies do you use to filter through this process?
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I ditch anything that I haven''t looked at or used in the past year unless it''s a family heirloom. And by "ditch" I mean donate, freecycle, or sell it if it''s still useable.

But then again I am a ruthless purger.
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I'm a hoarder. I eat baby food for snacks, and I save the jars... FI teases me about throwing some away, since we've got eighteen others - and he's not exaggerating.

Fortunately he doesn't have strong feelings one way or another, so long as the place is presentable, so I stack them symmetrically
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I'd rather not throw anything away. Which is my unhelpful answer
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Unless it''s a family heirloom or wildly sentimental, if it hasn''t been used or thought about in the last year, it goes. If I didn''t miss it in the last year, I probably won''t suddenly miss it now. If I do and figure out that I need something similar again, I''ll either borrow it from someone or pick it up again.
 
I go through phases of hanging onto random things for no real reason until I get the overwhelming desire to purge. That''s when I''ll go through boxes, etc. and just toss anything truly not important. I don''t let myself really look at this stuff, instead, I''ll glance at it quickly and throw it out (or put it in a box to donate). The longer I look at something I''ve hung onto, the more I''ll make excuses for keeping it.
 
Put it all in a box, keep box, if unopened after a year...dispose of box.

I find it VERY hard to throw things away.
 
If it hasnt been used in a year...ditch it. I dont get attached to too many things. I have plastic containers for
each of my kids that I keep their sentimental things in and I have one for myself and my husband that I keep
things in.

I''ve seen those shows on tv where people hoard everything and they cant even walk through their house.
That just gives me the shivers...makes me want to go find something to throw out right now
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Unless it''s a keepsake, if I haven''t thought of something or used it in two years, it''s out the door.
 
I have a hard time getting rid of things most of the time. I remember that dear aunt sally got me a hideous something-or-other 20 years ago for some occasion and even though I never see her, somehow I feel like she''ll know if I got rid of it or gave it away. It''s like that for most things I own, so I find parting with them very difficult. My solution? I actually have a glass of wine with me when I sort/purge. It takes just the edge off where I am no longer paranoid about who gave me what and I start just figuring out that it''s been in a box for 20 years, I''m not getting any use out of it, and there is someone else out there who may love it. Not to mention dear auny sally probably doesn''t even remember giving it to me anyway after 20 years! It''s definitely a process for me, but I feel so much relief and so much calmer once things are disposed of and organized more. We just recently took 5 large boxes of things to the Salvation Army, and while leaving the boxes there was a little heartbreaking, coming home to a cleaner space was SOOO worth it.

(And, for the record, I don''t even really remember what I gave them anymore. I can''t be missing it that much!)
 
If I''m closing an important phase or moving somewhere new, I try to put all of the sentimental things in a box all together, like "College". That way I don''t have to feel bad about keeping sentimental items even though they have no use and I wouldn''t want them on my bookshelf. Everything else, I try to use up, throw away, donate, etc.

For clothes, if I didn''t wear it last year all season, I need to have a good reason to keep it. Otherwise, it''s out. Anything that looks ragged or needs repairs I''m never going to get to, is out.

For old homework and papers, I see if there is anything that can be salvaged for future studies or reference. Study guides and very good notes are kept only if I think I might ever look at them again. The criteria goes that if I need to reference something I know is there, it needs to be locatable within 5-10 minutes or its no good (about my attention span when searching!). Everything else goes in the recycling bin. If I know all of the material well, it generally all goes out. Anything that is dated and will change over time goes out.

I keep cards and notes if the person took time to write something special, but generally only for a year or so. If it really meant something to me, I hold onto it forever. Generic birthday cards and greetings are generally kept only as long as they stay on the countertop in the kitchen.

For games and random things sitting around the house, I have a few more issues. I try to keep things as neat as possible and purge if I think it is hampering my style.

Hope this helps. If you can keep a system with criteria, it helps with the purging process. Also, if you''re unsure, go with the suggesttion from an earlier poster and pack up a box with items to purge. If you can''t remember what was in the box after 3 months, throw it away!
 
great suggestions!Ive been hard at work this morning and have used some of your suggestions!Already have thrown out two boxes of non -charity stuff...cant seem to let go of any jewelry related articles,books,store displays or research materials(which is alot)so im content to keep those items and have a clean and organized house as winter sets in!Thanks for the feed back!Any more suggestions are welcome!
 
I get rid of things constantly. I usually donate most of the things, but I find that a few months after donating I am looking for that item or after years of collecting dust I finally have a use for the thing I just got rid of. Things that are sentimental I keep because I can''t bear to part with it.

You mentioned board games and stuff. I would get rid of that and never think twice.
 
Decluttering is so awesome it always brings a fresh new energy to get rid of unused/unloved stuff! On Flylady.net under the Flying Lessons section under the "As you make Progress" section of the page there is a "How to Declutter" section with guidelines that I like. I like her suggestion of getting rid of anything that makes you feel sad or heavy.

When we dealt with a layoff last year it was helpful to get everything we didn''t use or want and sell it-that was super useful and really helped us out. We have also done Freecycle which is really useful for stuff that you can''t sell and charities might not want. Like if you have half used buckets of paint or other odds and ends people on freecycle really want it and put it to good use. I don''t have people come to my house however-I think it is better to meet in a public place like a library. There are some flakes on Freecycle who set a time to pick something up and don''t come through so that can be annoying. But all in all I have found it useful for getting rid of certain types of things and having them go to good use instead of a landfill.

Battered women''s shelters are another good place to give items as well. For me it helps motivate me to get rid of stuff to know that there are other people out there who actually need the stuff more than I do. It helps to get rid of clothing that I don''t use knowing someone else out there really needs it. On the flip side just about all our furniture etc. came from Craigslist-we have gotten really amazing deals from people on really neat pieces. We have dishes and you name it from eBay. I am really glad people were able to part with that stuff because it was just what I needed and not junk to me whereas it might have been junking up their place. So I try to get rid of anything I don''t love or use knowing it might well be perfect for someone else.

Recently I saw some of the show "Hoarders" online. That is one scary and motivating show.
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I live simply and am not a hoarder but that show scared me and helped set me off with fresh eyes on a round of dejunking where I found a few more things we didn''t use to sell or give away.

Mrs.2Artists
 
Date: 11/18/2009 1:45:47 AM
Author: neatfreak
I ditch anything that I haven''t looked at or used in the past year unless it''s a family heirloom. And by ''ditch'' I mean donate, freecycle, or sell it if it''s still useable.

But then again I am a ruthless purger.
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THIS! I am also a ruthless purger- I haaaaate clutter! Makes me crazy.
 
For sentimental stuff you don''t want anymore or have room for you can also take a picture or scan the item.

Mrs.2Artists
 
Really broken stuff goes no matter what. (garbage or recycling) Including stuff that has been water damaged or peed on by cats.

Kind of broken stuff (well, maybe I can fix it when I have time) goes into boxes and out to the storage shed.

Perfectly good stuff that I just don''t have room for but can''t part with gets boxed and out to storage shed.


Every year or two I open the boxes just enough to see what was in there. (broken or not broken) The not broken stuff gets donated to a thrift shop (benefits the Children''s Hospital). Broken stuff gets tossed (unless I can do a quick fix and then donate).

If it has been in the shed for a year or two and I never missed it, then it must be okay to get rid of.
If I open it and have the instant "I''m too attached and can''t part with this" feeling, then it stays in the box for the next year.


The BEST way to clean out the old stuff you don''t use?
Move.
It is amazing what you can part with when you are sick of packing and carrying boxes.
 
I second the move thing. We have moved a bunch and it really makes you want to get rid of excess stuff. Sometimes when I dejunk I imagine we are moving somewhere amazing like a tropical island and I think would I want it there? A while back it had looked like we might move to another country and that was very motivating to pare down.

As far as staying as junk free as possible you can do the 1 in 1 out rule or if you are trying to get rid of stuff do a 1 in 2 out rule. Helps get rid of things and makes you think looong and hard about buying anything.
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Mrs.2Artists
 
we just moved in jan of this year and it was PAINFUL. we had stored so much crap in our garage crawl space it was pathetic. it took us 3 months to go through everything in that space. in the end my husband ended up just taking full boxes and tossing them without even opening because it was too ridiculous to go through everything.

i read somewhere that most of what people save just never gets looked at or used again, one good way to find out what you DO use vs not is to label all your boxes with a date aka 1/1/2010. and then every time you go into a box, write the date on it. in 6 months or a year, go around and look at what boxes you actually went into to find something specific. after another 6 months or so, take the boxes that have not been opened in 6 months/1 year/2 years etc and just toss them. DON''T EVEN OPEN THEM. because obviously you don''t NEED anything in there to live your daily life...and if you open them people just tend to get sucked into ''oh i don''t want to get rid of this''.

to me this doesn''t apply to memory boxes with things like letters, cards, yearbooks, photos. i would put those in a separate section or label them differently, because you may not ever go into them or maybe once every 5 years but you already know you want to keep them.

in our master purge we only lost one thing that i was really sad about, this elephant hand-made terry stuffed animal i bought about 9 years ago for a hopeful future child and now we are pregnant and i can''t find it and i am sure it was in one of those boxes.
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but that was the price we paid for being totally disorganized i guess. there might be other things we lost but i might not know for years!

now our motto in our much smaller house with much smaller storage space is it has be used if its stored, aka a fan for summer or winter clothes vs summer clothes etc. we don''t hoard things we don''t have intentions of using or paper or anything like that. i never want to go through those 3 months again!
 
This is what I go by:

"When in doubt, throw it out!"
(And by throw it out, I mean donate it or freecycle it. Or sell it!)

This is what DH says:

"Well, I might need it someday. In a few years, or if we ever {insert situation in which we will likely never find ourselves here.}"

That's why I clean out his stuff when he's out of town for work.
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What? He never notices that things are gone. I used to do the same thing with my parents' stuff, too.
I don't like having a lot of things around, it makes me feel harried.

ETA:
One thing that works when DH really hems and haws over letting certain things go is to put them in a box that is out of the way. I put it in the garage or the shed with a post-it on it that says "Last used 11/18/09". Then I pull it out in six months or whenever I come across it and ask him if he *still* thinks he needs those things since they've been in a box for so long. He always says I can get rid of them, then.

I also have a hope chest for sentimental things that are not useful or necessary. (Diplomas, letters from my grandma, old photos, etc.) Our rule is that any stuff we want to keep but won't ever really use has to fit in that chest. It's really fun to go through everything whenever we have overflow and figure out what we don't really need to keep.
 
Get someone to help you ruthlessly toss stuff. I help my sister part with her boxes of crap and she does the same for me;e we usually have a glass of wine, and then go through boxes together and encourage purging crap we''ve carted around in boxes for years. We''re both terrible at getting rid of things (Her: this busted, chewed on ''70s doll might be worth money some day! Me: I really can''t part with that ratty tank top I''ll never fit again.) So it is the only way to actually toss stuff. Left to my own devices I''ll just cart boxes around for years and never open them. (My mom''s the same way- she has a storage shed filled with boxes that have never been touched since we moved in the late ''80s). At least it''s sort of organized?
 
I''m definitely a hoarder, but I had to puppy proof my room to prepare it for her arrival, so Audball helped me toss out all the junk I''d been holding on to. So, my suggestion is to enlist her
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Date: 11/18/2009 5:57:01 PM
Author: Scarabnight
I'm definitely a hoarder, but I had to puppy proof my room to prepare it for her arrival, so Audball helped me toss out all the junk I'd been holding on to. So, my suggestion is to enlist her
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Yeah, "helped", "whipped into submission"...definitely the same thing.
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I'm in Neat's camp of "Ruthless Purgers".
 
Date: 11/18/2009 6:01:03 PM
Author: audball

Date: 11/18/2009 5:57:01 PM
Author: Scarabnight
I''m definitely a hoarder, but I had to puppy proof my room to prepare it for her arrival, so Audball helped me toss out all the junk I''d been holding on to. So, my suggestion is to enlist her
27.gif
Yeah, ''helped'', ''whipped into submission''...definitely the same thing.
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I''m in Neat''s camp of ''Ruthless Purgers''.

Emphasize the ''ruthless''
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Date: 11/18/2009 6:02:56 PM
Author: Scarabnight

Date: 11/18/2009 6:01:03 PM
Author: audball


Date: 11/18/2009 5:57:01 PM
Author: Scarabnight
I''m definitely a hoarder, but I had to puppy proof my room to prepare it for her arrival, so Audball helped me toss out all the junk I''d been holding on to. So, my suggestion is to enlist her
27.gif
Yeah, ''helped'', ''whipped into submission''...definitely the same thing.
11.gif


I''m in Neat''s camp of ''Ruthless Purgers''.

Emphasize the ''ruthless''
25.gif
Somebody''s gotta do it
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Date: 11/18/2009 6:03:27 PM
Author: audball

Date: 11/18/2009 6:02:56 PM
Author: Scarabnight


Date: 11/18/2009 6:01:03 PM
Author: audball



Date: 11/18/2009 5:57:01 PM
Author: Scarabnight
I''m definitely a hoarder, but I had to puppy proof my room to prepare it for her arrival, so Audball helped me toss out all the junk I''d been holding on to. So, my suggestion is to enlist her
27.gif
Yeah, ''helped'', ''whipped into submission''...definitely the same thing.
11.gif


I''m in Neat''s camp of ''Ruthless Purgers''.

Emphasize the ''ruthless''
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Somebody''s gotta do it
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That''s the truth... and we know it''s not going to be me
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Having just shoe-horned myself into my new home, after garage sale and Goodwill donations, I can assure you that we can all live with a lot less than we own!

If you have not seen it, touched it, used it, known where it is, or needed it - - for the last two years - - out it goes. Books, movies, music, clothing, household items, everything. Only exceptions to this rule are family mementos and important sentimental objects. Be sure you understand what constitutes ''important''.
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Do not restore it, rebox it, stuff a closet with it, stick it in a drawer, or God forbid, rent a storage unit. Watch episodes of ''Clean House'' on StyleTV if you need courage.
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Or just go to those unclutter blogs to see how horrifying some people''s houses can get.
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We have a small house w/not much storage space. With 2 kids, the extra storage we put in fills up immediately, and I can not stand to feel like I''m being overrun by clutter in the house. I can''t function and I get mad. Then I harp on JD until we add more cabinets and go thru the clutter and organize. We just had a garage sale last month and afterward hauled SO much stuff to the Goodwill trailer (tho most of it was his moms). I don''t really have a system other than keep/toss/donate. If I''m not sure, I''ll keep it just in case, until the next time I freak out.

With clothes, I just explain to myself that this isn''t a sitcom and I do need to wear clothes more than once a year-I don''t need to stockpile 40 sweaters. Cull it down to the favorite 15 and look at all the space you get! I don''t need 37 pairs of jeans in 5 different cuts. I''d LIKE to have them yes, but I''d also like to be able to walk thru my house without kicking things out of the way.

For knick knacky things...I collect roosters/chickens, so have a cabinet for them and 2 cabinets for my important things-like little souvenirs my dad would bring back when I was little when he would go on hunting trips, and my special stuffed animals I grew up with. I have a couple little shelves in the kitchen w/some special items, and everything else goes.

In a perfect world, I would have floor to ceiling cabinets so everything was put away-nothing on the counters ever, and furniture that would flip up into a cabinet when not in use so everything is off the floor and open. Then I would lay on the floor and enjoy the uncluttered loveliness.
 
One category of stuff I always have a hard time getting rid of is my stuff from grad school. I have many methods books (for example, "Teaching Elementary Science," and "Best Practices in Reading Instruction," etc.). I''ve never opened the majority of basic methods books since I first used them 9 years ago, but I can''t get myself to do anything with them. They sit in boxes or on bookshelves, taking up space. I don''t really need the space for anything else (I get most of my fun reading from the library), but to me, it''s still clutter if I''m not actively using this stuff. I''ve also saved papers I''ve written in college and grad school. Some of these papers are 15 years old. Keeping this stuff drives me crazy but I can''t let them go.
 
People always give me stuff, and while it is kind and thoughtful that they are thinking of me, I really need nothing. If I wanted it and it costs less than $10,000, I already have it. How do you get people to stop giving you things?
 
Date: 11/19/2009 10:46:22 AM
Author: y2kitty
People always give me stuff, and while it is kind and thoughtful that they are thinking of me, I really need nothing. If I wanted it and it costs less than $10,000, I already have it. How do you get people to stop giving you things?
Do you mean they''re giving you used items they no longer need? If that''s the case I would think a "Thank you but I''m not in the market for a used coffee maker at this time" would suffice.

If they''re gifts, just say thank you, write a letter, keep it long enough for them to see you use it at least twice, and then give it away!
 
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