What to do with a 3 carat round?

[graybay]

Hi everyone!
I know there will probably be as many opinions as there are members on here. At least I HOPE so! I am conflicted about what to do with a 3 carat round diamond ring I have inherited. Keep in mind the following:

1) it was my mother in law's. i have no sentimental attachment to it. my husband would be very happy if i decided to keep it, as he is fairly sentimental, however, he ultimately wants me to be happy and wants me to LOVE, and be proud of, what i am wearing.

2) the diamond is near colorless, BUT, it has a very big inclusion. From the top, it appears as a smudge (sometimes it isn't noticeable). From the side, you can see the cloudiness if you are holding the ring to the light. the inclusion is fairly sizeable, but a jeweler said it was cut well and a nice color and a "medium" quality diamond. there are also a couple of small (not visible) chips from it being worn for so many years.

now, i could trade it in and get a smaller (1.5 maybe?) very good quality diamond ring, maybe even with a halo around it. it would be something i would like and be proud of. i feel if i keep the 3 carat ring, people will think i am trying too hard to be flashy, and if they were to notice the flaw, think i was "trying too hard". however, i am in my mid forties, with grown kids and a stable, 20+ year marriage, and don't think it would seem too much for where i am in my life. it all goes back to worrying about sacrificing quality for size. most people i interact with won't know it was handed down and will assume my husband bought it for me, unless i make a point of going around telling everyone it's an heirloom. i think if i had a smaller, excellent quality stone, i would feel better and be prouder and want to show it off. but maybe i am old fashioned and really, a 3 carat ring is still a 3 carat ring and i should just wear it and rock it.

what to do?

 

[MissGotRocks]

Talk to your husband and tell him exactly how you feel. Having an heirloom ring is very special IF it means a lot to you and you feel good wearing it. It seems that you would rather have the value of it traded into another, better quality stone and there is nothing wrong with that. Being saddled with an heirloom that doesn't make your heart sing is not an added plus in my opinion.

Here's hoping that your husband is open to your feelings about the ring. I can see where this could be a very delicate situation but it was left to you to wear and you need to be happy and comfortable with what that is. I would much prefer my children sell or trade my ring in on something that would make them happy rather than keeping it just because 'it belonged to Mom'.

 

[OCgirl]

First of all I would jump with joy if I inherit a 3 carat heirloom diamond. Here are a few things to think about, in my opinion:
1) I'm not a sentimental person but I would keep this diamond because it means something to your husband. Do you have any information about the diamond other than the carat weight (color, clarity... etc)? It might not be worth it to sell it in the secondary market as you will not get much depending on the color and clarity.
2) Depending on where the inclusions are, maybe you can have it evaluated for a recut. The recuit will probably help get rid of the chips and help hide the inclusion better. My stone is a SI1 clarity grade and it has a crystal near the table but the inclusion is hidden by the "arrows" so well that I cannot see it unless I put my face 1 inch from my ring. The recut may also turn this stone into something brilliant and you'll feel like you are getting a "brand new stone."

And I don't think rocking a 3 carat diamond is "trying too hard"

 

[mandasand]

Can you have it recut? I think you lose around .20 ct by doing that. I know BGD is doing this because other people have posted about it recently. At least you can have BGD evaluate it!

 

[graybay]

great insight, missgotrocks, thank you so much. i am going to edit my post to clarify that i have talked to hubby and he is ok with whatever i want to do. he wants me to keep it, but ONLY if i am going to wear it and love it, and if i am not excited about it and not going to wear it, he would rather not have it sit in the safe. he would want me to exchange.

 

[graybay]

First of all I would jump with joy if I inherit a 3 carat heirloom diamond. Here are a few things to think about, in my opinion:
1) I'm not a sentimental person but I would keep this diamond because it means something to your husband. Do you have any information about the diamond other than the carat weight (color, clarity... etc)? It might not be worth it to sell it in the secondary market as you will not get much depending on the color and clarity.
2) Depending on where the inclusions are, maybe you can have it evaluated for a recut. The recuit will probably help get rid of the chips and help hide the inclusion better. My stone is a SI1 clarity grade and it has a crystal near the table but the inclusion is hidden by the "arrows" so well that I cannot see it unless I put my face 1 inch from my ring. The recut may also turn this stone into something brilliant and you'll feel like you are getting a "brand new stone."

And I don't think rocking a 3 carat diamond is "trying too hard"

oh i like your response! makes me rethink things a bit...
no, no info on the diamond. she had it forever and wore it daily. now, i do have a lady who is a diamond buyer/seller and her initial advice was for me to keep it. she didn't think it was anything major and thought lots of ladies would totally keep it and wear it. she did start to think i should consider trading when she detected that i would probably go around announcing to people that it had the inclusion, kind of like, "oh you like it? just ignore the big splotch on it!" ... and she is right... that is something i would do. if i do trade it, i feel confident i will get a gorgeous stone and a quality ring.

 

[graybay]

Can you have it recut? I think you lose around .20 ct by doing that. I know BGD is doing this because other people have posted about it recently. At least you can have BGD evaluate it!

hmmm.... interesting idea! the good news is i am not in any hurry, so having them evaluate it is an excellent idea!

 

[MissGotRocks]

great insight, missgotrocks, thank you so much. i am going to edit my post to clarify that i have talked to hubby and he is ok with whatever i want to do. he wants me to keep it, but ONLY if i am going to wear it and love it, and if i am not excited about it and not going to wear it, he would rather not have it sit in the safe. he would want me to exchange.

That's wonderful - I am glad he is receptive to your feelings! It sounds as though you're not happy with it as is and perhaps it would be a candidate for recut. How much weight it would loose and how much it could hide the major inclusion are only things that a cutter could explain to you. Brian Gavin has done many with fabulous outcomes. The other option would be to trade it in which of course you have considered. The third option is just to lock it up and that really would seem a waste and a shame. Only you and your husband can determine how much you value the sentimentality of anything - the rest of us just have opinions and they will be as varied as clouds in the sky!

Do you have a jeweler to work with that would facilitate a trade? Perhaps if you have this current stone appraised you'd be better able to compare the value of this stone to the value of a new stone. Some people care very much about the money aspect; others not so much.

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

Is the stone only available to you as an ER stone? What if you wore it on your right hand (reset, etc...)

Personally I would not want an included stone for an ER. If, however, it could be recut into a fabu Ideal or OEC--then I might venture in that direction. I wouldn't mind losing some diameter/ctw--if the stone evolved into a knockout.

cheers--Sharon

 

[Enerchi]

What an awesome item to inherit!! Lucky you!

I think if it were something noticeable, I'd want to have it recut to improve the diamond. At 3ct, even if you lose a little weight, you are still sporting a very large diamond! BGD is who I'd go thru, but there may be other's who also do recuts. I'd also get it appraised to know what the diamonds specs are.

As for setting it, I'd set it as a RHR and then I'd be inclined to go with something totally out of my comfort zone! I'd go that route just because it came to you via an indirect route and you aren't attached to it but why not make it a 'fun' ring???

That's just what I'd do....

 

[GreenBling]

congratulations on inheriting a piece of fine jewelry! I too agree with others on improving the stone by giving it a re-cut. What a great story to pass down to the future generations! Otherwise, have you considered setting it as a pendant?

 

[rosetta]

I vote for a recut!

It would both "keep" the stone, and make it "new" and more to your taste.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I would absolutely look into a recut! Even if it turned out half the size in order to reduce or get rid of the inclusion, I'd much rather have an ideal cut smaller stone that was better in clarity! I also would not be comfortable wearing a three carat round stone at all. And the inclusions would drive me nuts. I had a much smaller family stone recut by Brian Gavin and lost 20% of the weight. However, if you are interested in turning it into an antique OEC or cushion, you need to contact Jonathan at Good Old Gold because they will also do recuts (see his August Vintage rounds and cushions).

 

[MyDiamondSparkles]

I'm waaaay sentimental, so I would keep it for sure. That being said you have to do what is best for you.

Do you have photos of the diamond? I would love to see it. Maybe a super close up photo and one at 6 inches away? I'm juts thinking that perhaps the inclusion isn't as bad or as noticeable as you think it is? Realistically how many people view a diamond close enough to see its flaws? And realistically how many of your friends/ coworkers/ family are wearing diamonds with flaws you've never even noticed? I mean unless your friends/ coworkers/ family are Pricescopers I just don't think people notice all that much--unless it's a big honking black inclusion that is.

Is it Cathy Waterman that does the settings with the wrap around thingies over the diamond? Some people like that look and depending on where exactly the inclusion is, it might be a nice way to keep the diamond and cover the inclusion. I do love the idea of a recut too.

The other advice I have for you is DSS (diamond shrinking syndrome) sets in fast for a lot of people. For some reason a diamond that looks way to large today will seem suddenly small given time. 2 years ago I tried on a 2 carat and said, geesh--gumball machine ring and chose the 1.5 instead. Within a few months the 1.5 seemed small, and now the 2 carat didn't seem much bigger--Go figure! I now have a 4.46 and I think I am done upgrading but you just never know. I'm in my 40's and in a solid marriage and I live in the Midwest where 1 carat viewed as large. I'm not sure if I could have worn this size diamond when I was in my early 20's, but hey, as I've gotten older I could care a less what other think about me.

Just sharing some thoughts and I hope they help.

 

[Christina...]

I'm really sentimental as well, so I would keep the stone, but I would consider re-cutting it for sure. Pre-pricescope I would have been very very happy with a three ct stone, but having the knowledge that I do now, and owning well cut stones, I know that I couldn't be happy with a diamond that was poorly cut. As you said, I think that some of the joy would be lost and I just couldn't be as excited about it as I once might have been. Fortunately though, it's of a size that a re-cut would be a great option if it's a candidate, even if you lost an entire ct of weight, you would still have a 2ct honker! And I think that I would look into have it cut like an OEC and really play up the heirloom side of it. If re-cutting wasn't an option than I think that I would have it set into a pendent or something other than an ring, where people won't have the opportunity to view it from 6 inches and the inclusions would be less noticeable.

 

[reader]

I would just love to see pictures.

 

[SparklyOEC]

I would love to see pictures too! That being said, I'm not sentimental at all, but would consider a recut before trading it in. As someone else mentioned you can go to BGD to have it evaluated or you can go to Ari at SS and see if it's suitable to be recut to an OEC (if you like the look of older cuts, that is). Check out these threads.

RB to OEC recut thread: [URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/rb-to-oec-recut-before-and-after-pics.177547/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/rb-to-oec-recut-before-and-after-pics.177547/[/URL]
Brian Gavin recut thread: [URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/my-brian-gavin-re-cut-diamond-before-and-after.168121/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/my-brian-gavin-re-cut-diamond-before-and-after.168121/[/URL]

I know there are more recut threads, but thought these 2 might help with your decision. Good luck!

 

[Mikla]

Ditto! I'd love to see some shots of this stone. No matter what you choose, be sure you are doing what you really want, and not what other people say is the right thing to do. You may be sentimental or you may not. You may prefer better clarity over carat size. We didn't even discuss color and your feelings on that. Just be happy that you inherited a lovely diamond and that you even have these choices to make because of it. A lot of people would just like to be in your shoes right now!! I can't wait to see what you decide!

 

[ariel144]

I would have it recut by GOG into an AVR...lucky you! Wear that rock and quit worrying about what others think.

 

[peasypeas]

I'm sentimental too so if it's not for an ER it's make a rockin right hand ring

 

[Enerchi]

Graybay - any chance you could post a photo of your lovely family diamond ring? Have you had any further thoughts about where you are going with this??

 

[m-2-b]

Agree w/ either a recut to MRB or AVR!