What NOT to do:

[SecondTimeCharm]

 

[ame]

Oh man. That sucks. HOw selfish and completely insensitive! I hope he gets it right.

 

[Jelly]

Secondtime, I''m so sorry to hear about your night. Seems like we all imagine what our dream proposal will be like, and I''m sure this is not how you envisioned it. Sounds like he was completely clueless about taking you to his fraternity.

Was the I color and SI1 clarity noticeable to the naked eye?

Have fun in choosing out YOUR diamond! Give him some input but you deserve to get EXACTLY what you want!

 

[bling*diva*]

~~That''s messed up that things didn''t go the way you wanted. It seems like he spent most of the night with his friends, when he should''ve spent it with you!! I hope the next proposal is a little less selfish, and more romantic!!!

 

[Nicole72680]

Wow i have to say that is a pretty bad proposal nite. You can definately look on the bright side of things that he actually was a man and did it. I am one of those girls who thinks they should be completely involved in the picking out the stone process. I would be very upset if i recieved a SI1 or lower diamond.
I actually could see a feather in a VS1...i have good eyes. the lowest color i would go down to is G and thats pushing it...i think you are very knowledgable in jewerly and diamonds and if you know what you are talking about he should listen!!

 

[AndyRosse]

Date: 10/12/2005 11:14:23 AM
Author: Nicole72680
Wow i have to say that is a pretty bad proposal nite. You can definately look on the bright side of things that he actually was a man and did it. I am one of those girls who thinks they should be completely involved in the picking out the stone process. I would be very upset if i recieved a SI1 or lower diamond.
I actually could see a feather in a VS1...i have good eyes. the lowest color i would go down to is G and thats pushing it...i think you are very knowledgable in jewerly and diamonds and if you know what you are talking about he should listen!!

I would be honestly upset if I received anything higher than a SI1 diamond. IMO, what a waste for something that I can''t see. I bet there are stones out there that are SI1 and SI2 that even you wouldn''t be able to see the inclusions in with your unaided eye. It just takes some looking, that''s all.

 

[Mara]

Date: 10/12/2005 11:04:20 PM
Author: Rascal49

Date: 10/12/2005 11:14:23 AM
Author: Nicole72680
Wow i have to say that is a pretty bad proposal nite. You can definately look on the bright side of things that he actually was a man and did it. I am one of those girls who thinks they should be completely involved in the picking out the stone process. I would be very upset if i recieved a SI1 or lower diamond.
I actually could see a feather in a VS1...i have good eyes. the lowest color i would go down to is G and thats pushing it...i think you are very knowledgable in jewerly and diamonds and if you know what you are talking about he should listen!!

I would be honestly upset if I received anything higher than a SI1 diamond. IMO, what a waste for something that I can't see. I bet there are stones out there that are SI1 and SI2 that even you wouldn't be able to see the inclusions in with your unaided eye. It just takes some looking, that's all.

I agree of course!

The right I SI can be STUNNING if it is cut right...I have an amazing J SI2 that gets daily compliments on how beautiful it is, but then again it's in the top 5% of cut quality stones in the world thanks to my Pricescope research.

So the I SI for me is not flash for no cash at all but a smart purchase...however cut is not mentioned at all here so I can only assume it's of mediocre quality if it didn't sparkle-knock-your-socks-off....so maybe you can get a better cut stone and still keep an eye-clean SI and a G or H if color really bothers you.

For me 'quality' is about cut of the stone and how much care was taken to really ensure it sparkles from every inch to every inch. Not color and clarity. But I really am not surprised to hear Second Time say that being as she works in a B&M where I think many times there is more focus on color and clarity than cut for the most part...

Hope you get the ring of your dreams..and that your hubby-to-be grows up after college and realizes there's more to life than his frat buddies.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

You post disappeared.....

 

[Mara]

Date: 10/15/2005 7:12:02 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
You post disappeared.....

I think she deleted it but it will show you the original post if you click on 'View Revisions: 1' on the bottom right of her post.

When you post...you can make changes for a few minutes and it will not show revisions, but after I think 5 minutes, it shows all revisions you make including your original post.

Just a tip! I love reading original posts after the 5 minutes...sometimes they change significantly.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

you are too funny Mara. I wonder why she deleted it. huh.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

BTW I love my "I" colored diamond. I think its a great alternative if you want a larger stone or are students and don''t have much of an income. Of course I am NOT in the industry.

 

[IrishEyes]

Eeeek. I just read this thread. I can see why she didn''t like the proposal!!! Personally, it sounds like he has some growing up to do before they marry. Hope it works out the second time!

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Date: 10/30/2005 7:55:46 PM
Author: IrishEyes
Eeeek. I just read this thread. I can see why she didn''t like the proposal!!! Personally, it sounds like he has some growing up to do before they marry. Hope it works out the second time!

Sounds like they BOTH have some growing up to do.

 

[MissAva]

Date: 10/30/2005 10:26:02 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring

Date: 10/30/2005 7:55:46 PM
Author: IrishEyes
Eeeek. I just read this thread. I can see why she didn''t like the proposal!!! Personally, it sounds like he has some growing up to do before they marry. Hope it works out the second time!

Sounds like they BOTH have some growing up to do.

Ditto. This sounds like the perfect example of why people should wait until they are older...

 

[E B]

Wow. I have an ideal cut I, SI1 and it's absolutely amazing. I bet it'd knock the socks off of every "mall store" G, VS2 out there.

Sorry about the events after the proposal, though. Not too ideal.

 

[snuga]

Wow, that sucks!!

The actual proposal (on campus and then dinner) sounded fine, even if it wasn''t what you wanted. But the fraternity thing would have pushed me over the edge

. Good luck on "the proposal: the sequel",

and keep us posted.

 

[chil1]

Date: 10/12/2005 11:14:23 AM
Author: Nicole72680
Wow i have to say that is a pretty bad proposal nite. You can definately look on the bright side of things that he actually was a man and did it. I am one of those girls who thinks they should be completely involved in the picking out the stone process. I would be very upset if i recieved a SI1 or lower diamond.
I actually could see a feather in a VS1...i have good eyes. the lowest color i would go down to is G and thats pushing it...i think you are very knowledgable in jewerly and diamonds and if you know what you are talking about he should listen!!

You have got to be kidding me. Besides the fact that this was a bad proposal, it makes me sick to hear someone say "I would be very upset if I received a SI1 or lower diamond". When I give my girlfriend a ring, I know that she will be ecstatic for just knowing that she wiill be with me forever and vice versa. It''s comments like this that make me truly appreciate what I have and knowing that she would be happy with a 10 carat H&A or a 25-cent lollipop ring.

It''s OK to have standards but GEEZ, it sounds like you need some growing up to do. There''s a lot more to love than having a VVS2, G ring.

 

[BrownEyes]

I''m new to this forum, and I felt compelled to reply to the original post which expressed disappointment with both the ring and the manner of proposing.

Please don''t think that the size/quality of the ring (and the quality of the proposal) doesn''t matter. I''ve been happily married for nearly 20 years to a pretty wonderful guy, but to this day it still bothers me a great deal that my husband didn''t make the effort to make the proposal (or the ring purchase) more of a romantic memorable event.

The proposal took place in a local restaurant over a shared burger and fries - it was more matter of fact like "why don''t we get married?" than romantic. We had been dating for 3 years and were both graduated with decent jobs lined-up but a lot of student loan debt. There was no ring with the proposal - not even anything symbolic. Needless to say, I was disappointed.

4 months after the proposal, I actually wound-up buying myself a small (but pretty) engagement ring just to have something to show I was engaged (people kept asking). Even though it has the traditional look of an engagement ring, I don''t consider it an engagement ring because it wasn''t presented as part of the engagement - if you know what I mean.

So, here I am 20 years later still longing for my ''dream ring'' and the romantic moment to go with it, even though my husband and I have an otherwise great relationship, strong marriage, wonderful kids, etc., etc.

Granted, we were both students at the time but it REALLY bothers me to this day that my engagement wasn''t more memorable, and surprisingly, it still REALLY bothers me that I don''t have a nice engagement ring with a wonderful memory attached to it.

I''m not sure how my husband could make it up to me at this point. He''s given me some pretty nice presents over the years (including a full-length mink coat), but he never came through with the beautiful diamond and memorable moment.

Am I crazy to still care? (About the diamond, that is - I actually love the guy quite a lot!)

 

[decodelighted]

Brown Eyes,
I can certainly sympathize with your disapointment. You''re wondering how he can make it up to you ... have you decided what you''d like specifically, then broached the subject with him ... really told him what a, say, 20th anniversary ring would mean to you, or making a new memory to commemorate the love you both obviously share with 20 yrs of happiness together.

We often discuss on here how some guys just don''t "get" it when it comes to our love of diamonds/rings/romance etc. It''s not that they''re better or worse than anyone elses partner. In fact, some of those smooth operators that "know women" aren''t exactly sticking around for 20 years, as they are so good at giving us what we want & leaving when they get bored. Some guys need it all spelled out for them. What EXACTLY we want ... why it''s important .. how happy we will be ...etc. Some have made "car" comparisons to their hubbies with great success. Deannabana is working on her 25th anniversary upgrade right now to a 1.3 ct cushion & her husband was reticent at first, but has come around after she expressed her desires, but not without some rocky moments & steps backwards. I''m not saying it will be "Easy" but nothing worth having really is.

One of my best friends (in her early thirties when this happened too - so no - young/stupid excuses) moved in with her boyfriend of two years and he actually literally thought it meant they were engaged. It was a mix-up that only got flushed out when another couple at dinner one night asked "When are you getting engaged" and he said "We are" and she said "Huh? No we''re not". Embarrasing! They later talked out their expectations and realized they''d had COMPLETELY different points of view. When she told him she wanted a ring & a proposal - he jumped on board & they are happily married 3 years now with a 1 yr old baby. (Also -- she got to completely pick out the ring the wanted).

Eh, that''s my 2 cents, hope it helps! & hope you get what you ask for (not what you wish for, cause I don''t think wishing''s enough).

 

[BrownEyes]

Decodelighted:

Thanks for the helpful suggestion and vote of confidence. As you can imagine, even though we''re both working professionals, now with 3 kids we have lots of other priorities, so I feel guilty even raising the ''ring issue'' ... but I also know that I never got over my initial disappointment, or the fact that major events in our lives came and went, yet my husband never thought to celebrate with a ring that would make my eyes sparkle ... lately, I can''t bear to watch the holiday jewelry commercials (you know the ones where they took about "a diamond means forever" ...) without getting teary ...

And what would you call an engagement ring after 20 years? I mean - I really don''t want an anniversary band - I want an honest-to-goodness engagement ring, and I can picture my ''dream ring'' in my head ...

Oh well ...

 

[E B]

BrownEyes,

An engagement ring is whatever you want it to be. If you can picture the perfect engagement ring in your head, it''s what you should have.

So, what does it look like?

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 12/4/2005 4:31:41 PM
Author: EBree
So, what does it look like?

DITTO!! I think speaking/writing things to "the universe" is a HUGE first step in actually getting them.

You NEED, NEED, NEED to see these two threads ...

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/a-little-sad-no-upgrade-for-25th-anniversary.34840/
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/the-journey-for-my-mini-upgrade-for-my-25th-anniversary.35061/

Deannabana has NINE kids! Calmly, carefully, with great love & patience she's been making her dreams a reality. You can too! I believe it!

ETA: those guys in commercials, "thinking" of getting rings for their wives: I've never met one

. Those ads are for LADIES. (I write/produce TV promos BTW). It's the same kind of fantasy where dinner's on the table but there are no dirty dishes to be seen .. Movies, shows & such screw up our expectations SO MUCH! My new motto: Get real & get "real" happy.

 

[BrownEyes]

Hi again - I can''t believe how supportive everyone on this forum is! Thanks for providing me with the links to Deanna''s story - - it certainly gave me some hope and made me feel a little better! I''ve been crying for days over the fact that a ring that is supposed to be ''forever'' is always going to be ''forever minus 20'' for me ... it makes me so sad ... However, recently I have found the courage to open-up a little to my DH and express my yearning for a diamond ring that would symbolize our past, present and future together ... I think (hope??) he''s finally beginning to understand how important this is to me - that it''s more than about just the diamond ...

In any event, I was so glad to read Deanna''s final posts and to learn that she had such a happy ending (I''d love to see pics of the finished ring!), and I can''t believe how helpful everyone here was in finding the perfect stone in the perfect setting at a reasonable price.

Here is a picture of my dream ring:

http://www.firenzejewels.com/store/views.cfm?product_id=1486&view=1&product_number=1364

I really love the lower setting, traditional look and double-row of tapered side baguettes - everything I''ve dreamed of for 20 years!!!

It''s by Natalie K - - I didn''t know anything about so-called ''designer'' settings until I found this platinum setting on-line - - However, there''s no romance to an on-line purchase, and I''m hesitant to even suggest to my DH that we even think about buying this setting (no matter how beautiful), sight unseen off the internet ...

Has anyone here had experience with Firenze Jewelers in NYC??
Is anyone on this Forum familiar with the quality of mountings by Natalie K?

Everyone on this Forum seems so knowledgeable about finding the highest quality diamond for the best price. If my DH and I were to purchase this setting first (as was suggested on Deanna''s thread), and then shop for the most beautiful, reasonably priced centerstone, I would need suggestions for the best place to begin shopping for the diamond ...

And what exactly is WhiteFlash?

Sorry for all of the questions, but thanks for your apparent interest and support! I''m so glad I stumbled onto this forum! I know I''m blessed to have a wonderful husband, great kids, good health, etc., etc., but still, I would also love to have a wonderful (ROMANTIC) outcome like Deanna ... and a beautiful ring to symbolize our 20 years together!

BrownEyes

 

[ellewoods]

Hi Brown Eyes.

You can find out about White Flash here: www.whiteflash.com

Also, I have visited Firenze Jewelers in NYC a couple of times. I have not purchased anything from them, but they would be one of the stores at the top of my list. I met with a wonderful man there, Miles, who took great care and time to explain to me all about diamonds and settings. He was extremely helpful, friendly, no pressure at all....it was like talking to a friend. He explained pros and cons of different cut styles, what characteristics I should look for when looking for something in my expected price range, etc. And I can''t emphasize this enough -- there as no pressure at all, he was very professional and actually cared to explain things to a potential customer and answer all of my questions. He was very honest and didn''t try to say what I wanted to hear or anything like that.

I was also extremely impressed by their wide selection of settings. They can also do custom work. I think their prices for ready made settings were very reasonable. They also sell loose diamonds, you can search for them on their website. Their prices for loose diamonds seem to be around those of other online retailers, maybe a little more. It sounded like some things may be negotiable though.

 

[E B]

BrownEyes,

That setting is amazing. It''s exactly what you deserve.

When looking for the perfect center diamond, two great places to look are www.whiteflash.com and www.goodoldgold.com. If you need us to help you find something beautiful, let us know! I love to research.

 

[BrownEyes]

Hi Elle ~

What an INCREDIBLY small world! It seems that you are a lawyer and so am I (actually for the past 20 years) - not in the NYC area. So is my DH - - we met in law school. Now we actually have our own office and practice together in different areas. Thankfully I don''t look like I''ve been practicing law for 20 years with 3 kids, etc. - - just the other day, someone mistook me for a high school student! Hee hee

ANOTHER COINCIDENCE: When I discovered that Natalie K setting (just the other day), I called Firenze Jewelers for a quote and actually spoke with Miles

- your assessment of him is right-on - - in spite of my hesitancy to complete any type of major purchase on-line, I felt I could actually trust Miles

... I really do love that Natalie K setting, and it seems that Firenze is the only place that has it ... I''m nowhere near NYC so if that setting is ''the one'', and if my DH comes around on this issue, it seems we may have to place an on-line special order ... that''s kind of scary so any reassurance you can provide re: Firenze Jewelers and Miles are greatly appreciated!

I looked at some of your prior posts, and I sincerely hope you get your dream ring soon ... it''s beautiful and kind of consistent with your screen-name.

In the meantime, what can you tell me about the "Pricescope discount" that I''ve seen referenced on this forum??

Thanx again ...

 

[BrownEyes]

EBree ~

I went to both websites - - what an education! Interestingly, I did a little price comparison between the H&A round brilliant diamonds available at whiteflash.com and those listed on the website for a local jeweler in my area - - the local jewelers internet listings for loose diamonds were 3X as much for what appeared to be comparable quality!

I am admittedly new to this in spite of having been married for 20 years, and I definitely have a lot to learn about diamonds. From a recent conversation with my DH it seems like he''s trying to become more educated (and receptive) in the area of diamonds - - so we would definitely appreciate all the help we can get.

Just for fun, here''s what I think I''d like to find to complement that setting:

1.20 carat round brilliant
Hearts & Arrows, Ideal or some other great cut
color: F - I
clarity: VS1 - SI1
- something beautiful and sparkly with a lot of life to it
- not more than $6K and preferably less since the setting I like is kind of expensive

If something like this exists, I''d sure love to know about it.

ALSO, I asked in prior posts, but I keep seeing references on this forum to a "PriceScope discount" - - can you please tell me how this works???

Thank you so much for your interest! Shopping on-line may not be the most romantic way to find and select your perfect ring, but already it''s been so much fun!

 

[E B]

BrownEyes,

If it's eye clean, how about this beauty?

http://www.whiteflash.com/diamonds/diamond_Details.aspx?itemcode=GIA-14814727

I believe the pricescope discount is given when the money is wired. Anyone at Whiteflash (or whomever gives the PS discount) will be able to elaborate.

 

[Lorelei]

Just chiming in here, apparently you get the advertised WF PS discount if you pay by wire transfer, the discount depends on the purchase price and is Wf's strongest discount. Anyone who purchases through WF who did not find the diamond on PS can pay by wire transfer and receive a 2% discount. HTH.

 

[aljdewey]

The Pricescope discount is the deepest discount WF gives. You need to mention during your transaction that you're a PS member, and it needs to be a bankwire transaction.

As far as possibilities in your budget, here are a few:

1.116, J, SI2 for $4540 (PS price)

1.10 J, SI1 for $3927 (PS Price)

1.22 I, SI1 for $5474 (PS Price)

1.101 H, SI2 for $5486 (PS Price)