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What makes a wedding fun?

4ever

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 9, 2008
Messages
2,260
From a guests perspective and in your opinion, what makes a wedding fun?

What are you doing to make sure your guests have a good time?

What kills the fun for you at weddings?
 

mrscushion

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 15, 2008
Messages
3,309
I'm not a huge dancer, so for me, it's great food & drink and at least a few other guests that I know and want to talk to.

A mood killer for me is bad food and long speeches that aren't funny or moving.
 

Amys Bling

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jun 25, 2010
Messages
11,025
For me it's good food, good drinks, and DANCING!!! We had a great DJ, a fireworks show right before cakecutting (fiancevsurprused me with this that day!) and a photobooth. The guests who were not big on dancing really enjoyed the photobooth!
 

vc10um

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 22, 2009
Messages
6,006
From a guests perspective and in your opinion, what makes a wedding fun?
I think for me, when I attend a wedding, it's whether or not I know the other people, whether or not the food and drinks are good, and whether or not I enjoy the music the DJ is playing that makes it fun for me!

What are you doing to make sure your guests have a good time?
We tried to keep all of the above in mind when we were planning our own wedding: getting good food, inviting groups of friends that we knew liked each other (and SAT them together!), and added an extra table of fun stuff for the kids to do so the parents didn't have to worry so much about entertaining them all night.

What kills the fun for you at weddings?
Ooooo...bad DJs. The ones who use the microphone more than necessary. The ones that put on a cheesy voice and sound like they are introducing the Knicks instead of just keeping the party flowing. The ones that play songs on your DO NOT play list because they CAN (seen it!). Also out of control kids. We had a TON of kids at our wedding, but to my knowledge, they were either dancing with each other on the dance floor, or coloring/playing games at the kids' table. Not running around like bats out of hell. But I've seen that. And it totally ruined it for me because I couldn't dance without worrying if I was gonna step on little Susie or Johnny playing TAG on the dance floor.
 

hoofbeats95

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 23, 2008
Messages
1,442
We had a photobooth at our wedding and that was a HUGE hit. The guests loved it. ALL ages got in it and had a blast. :) We got a ton of compliments on how fun our wedding was.

We had good food for dinner but we also had a great snack bar. We had a candy/snack bar mix. We had candy (chocolate!), chex mix, pretzels. . . and this might sound a bit redneck, but we had some of our homemade deer sausage with cheese and crackers. There was something to munch on all night while drinking!

For me boring is when the DJ plays too many fast songs in a row. I like to slow dance. In our area it just seems that only the kids are on the dance floor with the fast songs. I do like the fun dances like the Anniversary Dance. We finally got to do that for the first time since we were married this past weekend.

The Dollar Dance is popular in some areas. . . seems to be geographical. I HATE it! Cannot stand it. We didn't do it at our wedding. The last two weddings we were at we left during the dollar dance. I think that dance is rude.

Other than that - throw a party! That's how we thought of it and it turned out great. :)
 

Gypsy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 8, 2005
Messages
40,198
More than great food and drink for me. Although those are must haves. Too many fast songs isn't fun either.

I like weddings where you get a sense of who the couple are. Events that are personalized.

We just went to a wedding in May, everything was so generic. You could have plugged in any couple of people for the bride and groom. Frankly it was boring.

I like things that show effort and thought. Events that tell you something about the couple. There are so many opportunities to make the event yours. A really cool bouquet, great thoughtful vows, a meaningful first dance song, great toasts, pictures of the couple or their animals....whatever, make it yours.
 

Autumnovember

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 28, 2010
Messages
4,384
First thing is first for me, always as a guest:

FOOD.

If the food is really good, I'm having a ball.

Next is good music. If the music isn't good, I've noticed that it puts a damper on the experience of the wedding and people walk away "bored."

Alcohol. Its not necessary to have but if you ARE going to have it, please don't run out! I was at a wedding that ran out of alcohol and that was NOT fun.

Also, I completely agree with Gypsy, I love when I go to a wedding and I feel like I've gotten to know the couple even better than I did before so I guess you can say that I am not into generic weddings, I really love a unique wedding.

To make sure our guests have a good time:

We're having absolutely outstanding food that everyone is very very excited about.

I have been asking guests of various age groups about some music choices that they would like to hear.

Having good alcoholic beverage choices to choose from.

Having transportation from the ceremony site to the reception (different locations) paid for and taken care of that will transport my guests back and forth.

Having a short ceremony.
 

sillyberry

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Messages
1,792
I'm thinking back to all the weddings I've attended, and unfortunately, what has made me enjoy or not enjoy a wedding is something that the bride and groom really can't control - the guests.

Pretty much the weddings I've had the best time at were ones where I had lots of friends there to dance with and talk to. The ones where I didn't enjoy myself it was usually because I was a guest of a guest and I didn't really feel I fit in.

Also, what makes great pictures doesn't necessarily make a fun wedding. I've had more fun at simple weddings with fruit centerpieces than those with amazing tablescapes. Not that one shouldn't do amazing tablescapes (one of my personal regrets from my own wedding was that I didn't spend more on decor, something I only realized in retrospect) but I don't think it made a difference to anyone at the time of the event.
 

amc80

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jun 18, 2010
Messages
5,765
The last wedding I went to had a photo booth which was really fun. The DJ also did a great job of keeping the party going. Oh, and the open bar helped as well.
 

asymons412

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 25, 2011
Messages
247
Amys Bling|1311070583|2972055 said:
For me it's good food, good drinks, and DANCING!!! We had a great DJ, a fireworks show right before cakecutting (fiancevsurprused me with this that day!) and a photobooth. The guests who were not big on dancing really enjoyed the photobooth!
I'm so glad to hear you say that because we're having a photobooth too, and I thought it would be a lot of fun! Although some of my friends think its cheesy :lol: but c'mon, open bar + dressed up friends + a photobooth with props? The definition of fun. ;))

I think that atmosphere is everything! A light ambiance, a good DJ or band and great food. As long as you can keep the guests feeling happy, the party feels fun! We're also having a Viennese hour with sparkler fireworks to brighten things up towards the end of the reception. I hate when parties feel like they just drag on.

Oh! One more thing... I really appreciate when the ceremony and reception are at the same location (no driving) with no lag time in between the ceremony and the cocktail hour. When I told my parents and inlaws that having everything on-site was a priority, simply for the guests' convenience, they immediately started saying how it was my day, I shouldn't worry about conveniencing the guests, blah blah... but I know that it's something *I* very much appreciate at weddings. So why not?
 

centralsquare

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 18, 2009
Messages
2,201
Open bar and good music. I think everything else has to just be OK....like the food can't be awful, but I don't think having the absolute best food will make people have more fun. But, having and open bar and good dance music will.
 

jstarfireb

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 24, 2007
Messages
6,232
Gypsy|1311103680|2972414 said:
I like weddings where you get a sense of who the couple are. Events that are personalized.
TOTALLY agree with this! Weddings that are clearly infused with the personalities of the couple are the best for me. Interesting and personal decor and music, relevant readings and other parts of the ceremony, heartfelt and personal speeches...things like these keep the generic away.

I like somewhat unique venues. My favorite wedding so far was at an aquarium. They got married in front of a big tank, and they had some of the exhibits open to browse through. It was awesome.

Good food is a must! Necessary, but not sufficient, for a fun wedding.

I couldn't really care less about dancing, on the other hand. I'd rather just mingle and not break a sweat.

ETA: Oh yeah, as asymons said, having to drive from a ceremony site to a reception site and/or having several hours' gap between them is a big downer for me!
 

Gypsy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 8, 2005
Messages
40,198
Ohhhh... totally agree about the unique venue. I'm not talking about the surface of the moon, but somewhere that can't just be relocated to ANY city anywhere in the world with no one the wiser. I don't care for impersonal ballroom weddings cause I feel they take A LOT OF WORK to make them feel personalized. Not that it can't be done, and done well... but if you start off with something different or scenic or whatever, it's much easier.

I know someone was talking about a beach wedding and Kenny complained, but I LOVE beach weddings. And garden weddings. And winery weddings. I would adore going to an aquarium (we actually considered one, but once we priced it out we just couldn't afford it, and they wouldn't let me get married by the otters) or one at a local museum.

You can also celebrate (to the extent possible and allowable by your budget) your geographical location to make your wedding unique. If you are in Nor Cal, wineries or coastal views, if you are in NY... the skyline. You get the point. If you don't have a lot of money, a backyard wedding can be awesome (and it's definitely personalized) or one at a park or in a barn (hello Deco's wedding anyone?).

I just don't want to feel like I'm at a convention. Or worse. Prom. Or a Highschool reunion. :shock:

And I totally agree about the preferring one venue for both the ceremony and the reception, or at least having both venue's be reasonably close together. And I can't stand the long gap between a morning or afternoon ceremony and an evening reception... I find it very inconvenient. I LIKE going to ceremonies (most people don't and I get that, but I'm not one of them) but when they are split up like that... unless it is family, I'm only going to the reception, sorry folks.
 

Autumnovember

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 28, 2010
Messages
4,384
I guess its a good thing that our ceremony and reception are 5 blocks away from each other?
 

zipzapgirl

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Aug 28, 2008
Messages
369
Plan it like you would any great party... good food, flowing drinks, good music that lots of people like. And no hassles. Try to keep the jumping through hoops and strict formalities at a minimum.
 

slg47

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 4, 2010
Messages
9,667
asymons412|1311120053|2972571 said:
Amys Bling|1311070583|2972055 said:
For me it's good food, good drinks, and DANCING!!! We had a great DJ, a fireworks show right before cakecutting (fiancevsurprused me with this that day!) and a photobooth. The guests who were not big on dancing really enjoyed the photobooth!
I'm so glad to hear you say that because we're having a photobooth too, and I thought it would be a lot of fun! Although some of my friends think its cheesy :lol: but c'mon, open bar + dressed up friends + a photobooth with props? The definition of fun. ;))

I think that atmosphere is everything! A light ambiance, a good DJ or band and great food. As long as you can keep the guests feeling happy, the party feels fun! We're also having a Viennese hour with sparkler fireworks to brighten things up towards the end of the reception. I hate when parties feel like they just drag on.

Oh! One more thing... I really appreciate when the ceremony and reception are at the same location (no driving) with no lag time in between the ceremony and the cocktail hour. When I told my parents and inlaws that having everything on-site was a priority, simply for the guests' convenience, they immediately started saying how it was my day, I shouldn't worry about conveniencing the guests, blah blah... but I know that it's something *I* very much appreciate at weddings. So why not?
totally agree with the bolded! this was really important to us (so yes we are having a standard ballroom wedding) but hopefully we can make it really nice.
 

violet3

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Dec 18, 2007
Messages
3,793
Autumnovember|1311157301|2972826 said:
I guess its a good thing that our ceremony and reception are 5 blocks away from each other?
Yes! DH and i just went to his cousin's wedding, which was wonderful and so beautiful, but the ceremony was at 2 and the reception was at 6. The venue was about an hour from the reception space, which just seemed like forever. Having the two right near each other will be so convenient for your guests!
 

mrswahs

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jan 18, 2011
Messages
499
mscushion|1311069362|2972047 said:
I'm not a huge dancer, so for me, it's great food & drink and at least a few other guests that I know and want to talk to.

A mood killer for me is bad food and long speeches that aren't funny or moving.
Exactly this for me.

I also really appreciate the little details that go into a wedding. As an artsy person I really have an appreciation for good design.
 

jstarfireb

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 24, 2007
Messages
6,232
Gypsy|1311151153|2972816 said:
I know someone was talking about a beach wedding and Kenny complained, but I LOVE beach weddings. And garden weddings. And winery weddings. I would adore going to an aquarium (we actually considered one, but once we priced it out we just couldn't afford it, and they wouldn't let me get married by the otters) or one at a local museum.
I would have loved to get married at a museum! The first venue I fell in love with for my wedding was the Penn Museum. I wanted to get married in front of the sphinx. But the venue fee was over $3k and I think they had a $150/person minimum for food, which was WAYYYY over my budget. I ended up being forced to choose a venue that was a lot more generic because of location and budget constraints, but I personalized the ceremony and reception in other ways. My other dream wedding would have been a beach wedding, but most of my family and friends live in the Northeast and probably wouldn't have come.
 

FrekeChild

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 14, 2007
Messages
19,456
Thinking outside of the box.

I've been to the ballroom weddings...with dancing, bad buffets and grand floral arrangements. And I have been bored ridiculously silly.

We had a long gap. Wedding was at 4, dinner at 7 I believe...but the ceremony was at Mandalay Bay and the reception was at The Venetian. Some of our guests went and had drinks between, some went back to their room and relaxed a bit, some just went sightseeing (and if you're familiar w/ the Las Vegas Strip, you know that MB and The V are on two opposite ends of the Strip, and it can take a while to travel that distance!)

I think we did alright. Our guests still don't shut up about it all...I think what made it fun was that it wasn't...fussy--I did nothing for decor. We had really excellent food and a TON of it. It was just like we threw a really great dinner party at a really great restaurant and people could come see a show with us afterwards if they wanted. The ceremony was kind of a necessary thing--but very very short--just the bones. I've sat through too many LOOOONG formal Catholic ceremonies to know that I wanted short, sweet and to the damn point!

Weddings are boring here in NM. I haven't had the opportunity to go to one that didn't include a LOOONG ceremony and terrible buffet food. And I've certainly never been to one that had a photobooth...that sounds awesome.
 

lliang_chi

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 13, 2008
Messages
3,740
The long gap between is definitely a killer.

One minor thing that doesn't cost a lot is a bus to take people from the hotel to the venue. I had a "party bus" as our guests called it, and it was GREAT because EVERYONE could totally rock out and not worry about driving home. I guess my friends were just booze hounds.

I guess generically speaking, especially for an "out of town" wedding, something that's considerate of the guests. Small things a gathering the night before to give well wishes to the couple, or day after brunch. It doesn't have to be paid for, just a "C'mon down and meet us at X." These are all things that make me think the couple is really thinking about their guests.
 

amc80

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jun 18, 2010
Messages
5,765
lliang_chi|1311368651|2974817 said:
The long gap between is definitely a killer.

One minor thing that doesn't cost a lot is a bus to take people from the hotel to the venue. I had a "party bus" as our guests called it, and it was GREAT because EVERYONE could totally rock out and not worry about driving home. I guess my friends were just booze hounds.

I guess generically speaking, especially for an "out of town" wedding, something that's considerate of the guests. Small things a gathering the night before to give well wishes to the couple, or day after brunch. It doesn't have to be paid for, just a "C'mon down and meet us at X." These are all things that make me think the couple is really thinking about their guests.
This is what we are doing. Since everyone is flying all the way across the country, we are having a welcome dinner the night before (sort of in place of a rehearsal dinner). My mom was shocked when I said we were doing this. Um, really? People are paying all this money to attend, the least we can do is buy them dinner. We are also arranging for transportation between where the wedding is and the cruise port (about 30 minutes away). My mom also didn't think this was necessary. They when I told her the price, she asked if it included gratuity, which it doesn't...so she suggested a tip jar. :oops: Really, mom, we'll cover it.
 

lliang_chi

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 13, 2008
Messages
3,740
DH and I had a (booze) party the night before and arranged for transportation to and from the hotel for the cocktails. We also got a bus the day of the wedding to and from the venue (ceremony & reception at the same place). It was pretty cheap, a few hundred dollars each night. Totally worth it in my book. But I guess it's easiest when you have everyone from OOT staying in the same hotel. Both times it was GREAT we got the buses because our guests were quite the partiers! Fun times
 

Gypsy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 8, 2005
Messages
40,198
The hotel we booked for our guests provided us with a free shuttle service to and from our wedding. It was a big draw and it was the reason so many people stayed at the hotel, even some who lived in the Bay Area. It was also the main reason we booked that particular hotel.

Buses do make things much easier. And you can call around to hotels and see if any of them are willing to throw in a couple of perks in exchange for your business.
 

bee*

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 14, 2006
Messages
12,170
Gypsy|1311103680|2972414 said:
More than great food and drink for me. Although those are must haves. Too many fast songs isn't fun either.

I like weddings where you get a sense of who the couple are. Events that are personalized.

I like things that show effort and thought. Events that tell you something about the couple. There are so many opportunities to make the event yours. A really cool bouquet, great thoughtful vows, a meaningful first dance song, great toasts, pictures of the couple or their animals....whatever, make it yours.
I agree with this. I like seeing a happy bride and groom enjoying their day. I love personalized touches.
 

House Cat

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 22, 2009
Messages
4,158
From a guest's perspective, the one thing that makes a wedding fun above and beyond anything else is a happy bride and groom. If the couple is super stressed, it won't matter what kind of special touches are all around, the event won't be the same.
 

GliderPoss

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 25, 2008
Messages
2,634
  • No huge gap beween ceremony & reception
    Plenty of booze
    Decent food
    Good music - in fact the less the DJ speaks the better! LOL
 

Tuckins1

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 13, 2008
Messages
8,614
Good food, good drinks, and good music! The decorations and all that extra stuff are fine, but as long as a wedding has the basics, its all good!
 

Rhea

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 20, 2007
Messages
6,306
Gypsy|1311103680|2972414 said:
We just went to a wedding in May, everything was so generic. You could have plugged in any couple of people for the bride and groom. Frankly it was boring.
I've been to several like this. I'm starting to think that nothing else exists!

Weddings are fun when the speeches are short - British weddings have terribly long speeches - I've learned to time it so I happen to in the bathroom for most of them, and there's not many planned things that interrupt the flow. I don't need to be gathered for the cake cutting, garter toss, bouquet toss, or anything else really. It feels forced when that happens.

I like good food, good music, and the couple to show a bit of personality.
 

Lady_Disdain

Ideal_Rock
Trade
Joined
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Messages
3,988
Being able to talk and catch up with friends and family I haven't seen in ages. I am a talker, not a dancer. I have left weddings early because the dance music was too loud to talk, even though I was sitting as far from the dance floor as possible, so I was just sitting around bored.
 
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