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What does white privilege mean?

Dancing Fire

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Apr 3, 2004
Messages
33,852
I often hear CC say she have "white privilege" and that she is ashamed to be white. Why should anybody be ashamed of their skin color? :confused:
 
The younguns are tired of explaining this s*** to the older I'm-not-racists who don't listen. It's too late for them, but it's NOT too late for others, and those are the ones who will benefit from the education.
 
A bit off topic but we were on holidays with my son (6yo) and a few things happened that led to us having a discussion about privilege with him.

Even at this age it is interesting to see his little brain click when he recognises certain aspects of his life that he takes for granted and has never known differently.

Of course being a cheeky 6yo one of his come backs were: "Does my privilege not extend to sugar Mummy because you always tell me sugar is not my life and I need to accept it" :lol:
 
Is CC Calliecake? Because I've never seen her say she was ashamed to be white.

In my mind, it means being able to go through life without having to think about what it means for every minute of every day of to go through life without it.

One of my siblings is in an interracial marriage (sibling's spouse is a law professor, by the way). There is nothing quite so illustrative of what white privilege means as being a white parent to a child (male) who looks black or mixed race. Opens your eyes to a whole different experience.
 
mellowyellowgirl said:
A bit off topic but we were on holidays with my son (6yo) and a few things happened that led to us having a discussion about privilege with him.

Even at this age it is interesting to see his little brain click when he recognises certain aspects of his life that he takes for granted and has never known differently.

Of course being a cheeky 6yo one of his come backs were: "Does my privilege not extend to sugar Mummy because you always tell me sugar is not my life and I need to accept it" :lol:
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I misread it as he's calling you a "Sugar Mummy".
 
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I appreciated the link @pearaffair shared about the simple lesson to explain ‘priviledge’. I participated in a very similiar exercise years ago in a work team building event. The only difference being that we were not told we had to stay in our seats, though many assumed they had to. I was farther away than some from the bucket, so I got up and walked closer to toss my ball in.

That’s where I feel the exercise might fail students - by making them think they cannot get up, move up, and by their own effort improve their ‘position’. To make them stay in their seat implies that they have no control over bettering their position in life, and that they must ‘stay put’. And that simply is not true.

No one has a 'say' in how they come into this world, but everyone (in this country) has a 'say' regarding what they do once they get here and the choices they make going forward. To him that will, ways are not wanting.
 
the_mother_thing said:
I appreciated the link @pearaffair shared about the simple lesson to explain ‘priviledge’. I participated in a very similiar exercise years ago in a work team building event. The only difference being that we were not told we had to stay in our seats, though many assumed they had to. I was farther away than some from the bucket, so I got up and walked closer to toss my ball in.

That’s where I feel the exercise might fail students - by making them think they cannot get up, move up, and by their own effort improve their ‘position’. To make them stay in their seat implies that they have no control over bettering their position in life, and that they must ‘stay put’. And that simply is not true.

No one has a 'say' in how they come into this world, but everyone (in this country) has a 'say' regarding what they do once they get here and the choices they make going forward. To him that will, ways are not wanting.
Click to expand...

Oh that’s really cool!
 
I will give you an example, true story.

My daughter and I were walking around in a city towards a park. It was a little sprinkly, but as we got further from shops & restaurants and closer to the park area it started to rain and then to pour. We came upon a restaurant. I said, "Let's go in there to use the bathroom and take our time to wait out this downpour." She said, "Won't they expect us to sit down and order something?" I said, "Doubt it. Let's exercise our white privilege and see what happens."

Nothing happened. We walked in, saw a sign for the bathroom and went to it. It was around 3 in the afternoon, there were about four people eating at tables and a few people at the bar. We used the bathroom, checked our phones, hung out for a few minutes, and left. No one even acknowledged us.

Now it's a thing for us; we do it whenever we go out together. It's kind of our own little social experiment. I guess one could say: yeah, but - you're going to places where the clientele is mostly white, try doing that in <name black urban community>. We don't know because we haven't tried. But we can go about our lives without ever needing to check that out. A person of color doesn't have that option.
 
Using a restroom is white privilege? :rolleyes:. Since I am Chinese I'm not allowed to pee ?
 
I remember - on a trip to Italy some 20 years back - restaurant employees would literally yell at ‘you’ and make a scene if you used their restroom without purchasing something, and some would force you to pay to use the restroom if you weren’t dining there ... it did not matter your skin color. I never gave it much thought before then (I was much younger), but it made sense to me during that trip seeing it from the businesses’ perspective; I realized it was actually pretty arrogant to assume that I had a right to use a restaurant’s bathroom without being a customer; after all, I wouldn’t walk in and just help myself to a bottle of water or something to eat and not expect to pay.

Since then, if I need to use the ‘facilities’ of a business, I try to make a point to purchase something, even something small, or at least ask permission if a purchase isn’t possible/feasible at the time. It seems any more, in the U.S., most businesses really won’t care unless you’re being a jackass in some way that disturbs their paying customers.
 
I can't be mistaken for anything other than what I am, which is a black woman. And I unfortunately remember when there were separate water fountains for colored people. Separate bathrooms. That black folks could only go to the amusement park 2 days a week and it wasn't on the weekends. It is sad that at MY AGE that I remember these things. I was very young to be sure, but that was burned into my memory.

And let me tell you something; in Italy and in Spain, if you are from Africa, you will catch hell depending on where you are. Like I said, I'm a black woman. Dont nobody know if I'm american or not until I open my mouth.

but you know what, I need to sit on my hands because you can't unsay what you said.
 
To me, white privilege means having people treat you with natural respect and never looking down on you for no reason. I'm quite sure that people of color have a different experience from that, to a greater or lesser degree, depending on where you are.
 
Dancing Fire said:
Using a restroom is white privilege? :rolleyes:. Since I am Chinese I'm not allowed to pee ?
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Well I dunno - try going into an establishment and using the bathroom without being a customer and come back and do a field report. These two guys once tried waiting for a friend at Starbucks without having bought anything first and it didn't work out so well. https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-new...starbucks-say-they-feared-their-lives-n867396

Maybe older Asian men have it easier. I'm feel that in my "social experiment" with my daughter it's not just the fact that we are white but that I am older that allows us to always get away with it.
 
the_mother_thing said:
I remember - on a trip to Italy some 20 years back - restaurant employees would literally yell at ‘you’ and make a scene if you used their restroom without purchasing something, and some would force you to pay to use the restroom if you weren’t dining there ... it did not matter your skin color. I never gave it much thought before then (I was much younger), but it made sense to me during that trip seeing it from the businesses’ perspective; I realized it was actually pretty arrogant to assume that I had a right to use a restaurant’s bathroom without being a customer; after all, I wouldn’t walk in and just help myself to a bottle of water or something to eat and not expect to pay.

Since then, if I need to use the ‘facilities’ of a business, I try to make a point to purchase something, even something small, or at least ask permission if a purchase isn’t possible/feasible at the time. It seems any more, in the U.S., most businesses really won’t care unless you’re being a jackass in some way that disturbs their paying customers.
Click to expand...

If I'm not "experimenting" I too will make it a point to be a customer if I'm availing myself of the services of a business. But just because I don't always choose to exercise my white privilege doesn't mean that I don't have it. The problem with your last sentence is that some people feel their paying customers are being disturbed when they aren't. Here's an example of that: https://thegrio.com/2018/06/24/main...ck-mans-home-after-he-questions-store-policy/
 
I don't think you get it MT, they CANNOT get up and move, they are blocked by white privilege. How does one move up if one cannot move. It's REAL easy for white people to move up but not necessarily poor whites. The blacks are told to sit in their seat and if they try to get up, they are pushed down, do they fight? they go to jail. It's stacked against them from the start.


the_mother_thing said:
I appreciated the link @pearaffair shared about the simple lesson to explain ‘priviledge’. I participated in a very similiar exercise years ago in a work team building event. The only difference being that we were not told we had to stay in our seats, though many assumed they had to. I was farther away than some from the bucket, so I got up and walked closer to toss my ball in.

That’s where I feel the exercise might fail students - by making them think they cannot get up, move up, and by their own effort improve their ‘position’. To make them stay in their seat implies that they have no control over bettering their position in life, and that they must ‘stay put’. And that simply is not true.

No one has a 'say' in how they come into this world, but everyone (in this country) has a 'say' regarding what they do once they get here and the choices they make going forward. To him that will, ways are not wanting.
Click to expand...
 
the_mother_thing said:
I appreciated the link @pearaffair shared about the simple lesson to explain ‘priviledge’. I participated in a very similiar exercise years ago in a work team building event. The only difference being that we were not told we had to stay in our seats, though many assumed they had to. I was farther away than some from the bucket, so I got up and walked closer to toss my ball in.

That’s where I feel the exercise might fail students - by making them think they cannot get up, move up, and by their own effort improve their ‘position’. To make them stay in their seat implies that they have no control over bettering their position in life, and that they must ‘stay put’. And that simply is not true.

No one has a 'say' in how they come into this world, but everyone (in this country) has a 'say' regarding what they do once they get here and the choices they make going forward. To him that will, ways are not wanting.
Click to expand...
You’re demonstrating privilege in action with your comment - you see everyone’s place in society as purely a result of their own effort - that’s the American dream after all. But the way privilege works, it’s lots of invisible boosts for the privileged party and lots of invisible anchors for the non-privileged. So if you don’t have privilege, you can’t get up as easily, you are stuck in your seat, you can’t get ahead
 
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See if this helps you get it DF but honestly it’s not just about going to a restroom unchallenged - although that’s a demonstration of it. I’m not going to try and explain it more - that’s why I put the links up for you to learn about it yourself.B9B85AA1-05F1-434A-94EB-1F0590F99F13.gifCAB25ADA-F670-4078-A4ED-605DCBF492B2.gif
2E551CEF-B233-41B3-8A1B-C560EDB40891.gif
 
I can count on both hands the times I was told to "Move it along" by cops for speeding and smoking weed in public. Never got a ticket, never even got reprimanded. At the time(s) I was a cute high school/college aged girl out enjoying life. If I'd been black? Who knows how it all would have turned out, I'm imaging at least one arrest at the very least.
 
Foxinsox - your cartoon really sums it up.

It's easy to do well in life when you've had a nice upbringing. When I meet or hear of people who have a lot of problems, I NEVER forget that not everybody had a nice home life growing up.
 
Tekate said:
I don't think you get it MT, they CANNOT get up and move, they are blocked by white privilege. How does one move up if one cannot move. It's REAL easy for white people to move up but not necessarily poor whites. The blacks are told to sit in their seat and if they try to get up, they are pushed down, do they fight? they go to jail. It's stacked against them from the start.
Click to expand...

Growing up, I was a ‘poor white girl’ ... trailer park and all ... until I chose to no longer be. I know, you’ll come back and tell me "not everyone can choose" ... yada yada yada. And just like every other time, I won’t buy it because I know and have seen too many other women and minorities who started out far worse than me who have succeeded well beyond me. It CAN be done ... you can make choices or make excuses - up to ‘you’. I read a LOT of excuses, and a LOT of people here saying minorities "can’t" ... ever stop to think you might be the problem? Maybe you are the very people keeping them down, making them think they can’t.
 
Growing up I was the daughter of an alcoholic and a drug addict in a meh part of town, but Dad did work! After young life of neglect, abuse, pain, alcohol, and codeine and my reaction to it, I decided to remake myself when I was 18. I changed my nick from Cathy to Kate (which only my mother ever called me because she hated the name Catherine). I changed everything I could, I wasn't black so I didn't have to deal with white privilege, my sister helped me a few months b4 I turned 18 to get loans, work study, grants through the United States Government, without the government's help I could not have finished college. Some people CANT make it, like either of my brothers, my sister became a superintendent of schools, big shot, smart smart girl. My brother's were/are no-ops. So I've seen those who can and those who can't. Everyone can choose to try and raise themselves, but not everyone can succeed and with government programs at an all time low it's nearly impossible to get ahead if you are lower class and white and if you are black? forget about it. If you want you can read Pew Research they have plenty of stats and reports and who get's ahead and who doesn't, it's very very enlightening reading. I don't care if you buy it or not, I know what my experience was, I am much more successful than some of my richer friends, all white, because I had more cunning I think, I had no Harvard or Yale parent (actually my mother did go to Our Lady of Good Counsel in White Plains for 2 years and then dropped out)..I was quick, smart (If I do say so myself, and I heard it all the time from the nuns).. I would be dead now if I were black I'm sure. Something women don't talk about per se is beauty, I'm going to sound conceited but I know this, I was very very good looking, green eyes, light brown hair, everything was just right, popular very popular, guys always asking me out etc.. so I will say that I used that in business, as an non entitled white girl I used what I had. I was very lucky to have these attributes. My name was Catherine Mary, one can get more Irish American but it's right up there. I went for a while to Fordham U, then dropped out because of money I worked my way up at IBM, at TCI.. I used whatever it took to get ahead, but not everyone is me, my sister was smart and got 2 masters and she got ahead on sheer intelligence, she was beautiful and she even went to Woodstock :). I don't believe if I made it everyone can, especially blacks. It's all about the luck and work, and not being black. I didn't even see a black person till I was 12. Minorities do not have the same advantages as the majority. Not even majority rules works in our republic. Good for you for making yourself something. I say thank you to the state of NY, the Feds for helping me get where I am, I thank myself, I thank my genes, but I am not gonna say I did it without help.

the_mother_thing said:
Growing up, I was a ‘poor white girl’ ... trailer park and all ... until I chose to no longer be. I know, you’ll come back and tell me "not everyone can choose" ... yada yada yada. And just like every other time, I won’t buy it because I know and have seen too many other women and minorities who started out far worse than me who have succeeded well beyond me. It CAN be done ... you can make choices or make excuses - up to ‘you’. I read a LOT of excuses, and a LOT of people here saying minorities "can’t" ... ever stop to think you might be the problem? Maybe you are the very people keeping them down, making them think they can’t.
Click to expand...
 
@Tekate I think it's awesome you worked as hard as you did, and did what you had to in order to succeed. But - in all sincerity & respect - that was a few years back. And I don't mean that to say it was easier or harder; rather, today and for several years, there have never been more opportunities for everyone to suceed. There is a way, a program, quotas, etc., so in this era, I think the playing field has been largely evened out to the pount that there are far fewer excuses/reasons/barriers to anyone who truly wants to 'make it', especially if you are a minority.
 
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