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Home What DO you let your kids get away with?

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TravelingGal

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So we all talk about picking our battles, so for fun I thought I''d start a thread about what we don''t pick. In what areas do you let your kids "get away" with things? This thread is for grins, giggles, and to share that no parents are perfect and sometimes we just let the chips fall where they may.

Me? Amelia has ALWAYS had issues with eating, which have recently only begun to get much, much better. I decided long ago not to pick the food battle, but this means I let her get away with one of my BIG pet peeves pre-baby...

She gets to eat while going about her business. She''s always hated the high chair and wouldn''t eat for ages if we sat her in it. So now I''ll just have the food out and she can eat and sort of putter about at the same time.

Only in the last month or so, she''s begun to enjoy eating while sitting down (thank god) but in a regular chair. And oddly, she has always liked eating in restaurant high chairs.
 
I have stopped picking the restaurant and the food battle as well. If she doesn''t want to eat something, she gets to leave the table. It''s just not worth it. She picks her own meal times now, no snacking and it''s been much more pleasant for everyone that way.

When we go out to eat, I always ask for a to go box right away. And usually there''s a grandparent on hand to take her for walks outside so she can sit still long enough to eat. When she starts fussing I grab my food and leave. Not ruining someone else''s meal over it.
 
I dread to think what madam will put me through in the next few years.
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At the moment I have the Three ''D''s - Dangerous, Destructive, Disruptive.

Anything outside of them I tend to not be too bothered about, anything within them I will not give into any amount of screaming or tantrums. So she can sit and play with my iphone and I don''t mind at all, but if she starts deliberately banging or throwing it then it goes away.
 
Date: 4/9/2010 1:18:28 PM
Author: Pandora II
I dread to think what madam will put me through in the next few years.
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At the moment I have the Three ''D''s - Dangerous, Destructive, Disruptive.

Anything outside of them I tend to not be too bothered about, anything within them I will not give into any amount of screaming or tantrums. So she can sit and play with my iphone and I don''t mind at all, but if she starts deliberately banging or throwing it then it goes away.
LOVE it. I think that''s probably we we adhere to as well.
 
Tgal--i was going to say the same thing. I let my kid have snacks anywhere in the house. He''ll carry around a little bowl of things. Meals are in the high chair only, but i don''t worry about the rest as long as it''s not choke-able. Also, he loves utensils and normally uses them with no prompting, but i let him eat with is hands (this drives charlie nuts) but iam a hands eater too so i am a hypocrite if i then go and scold him.

I also let him throw balls in the house. It took a lot of work to get him to understand that he couldn''t throw other things or hard things, but it sunk in eventually (we can barely go outside 5 mos of the year so i had to resign to some indoor recreation)
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This does get me in trouble when we go to other ppl''s homes tho. Most moms have a no throwing rule it seems
 
Date: 4/9/2010 1:43:23 PM
Author: Jas12
Tgal--i was going to say the same thing. I let my kid have snacks anywhere in the house. He''ll carry around a little bowl of things. Meals are in the high chair only, but i don''t worry about the rest as long as it''s not choke-able. Also, he loves utensils and normally uses them with no prompting, but i let him eat with is hands (this drives charlie nuts) but iam a hands eater too so i am a hypocrite if i then go and scold him.

I also let him throw balls in the house. It took a lot of work to get him to understand that he couldn''t throw other things or hard things, but it sunk in eventually (we can barely go outside 5 mos of the year so i had to resign to some indoor recreation)
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This does get me in trouble when we go to other ppl''s homes tho. Most moms have a no throwing rule it seems
Funny, we do the exact same thing! I was happy to have her learn how to throw, but we didn''t want to have her chucking everything. So we taught her to throw balls ONLY (which she happily does) and TGuy is happy to let him throw them AT him so he can show her about catching.

That''s a problem when she comes up to you with a ball and chucks it straight at you when you aren''t looking. It''s also an issue when she doesn''t realize that a hard wooden toy orange is NOT a ball and clocks you in the head with it.

Fortunately, most of the moms I know in my social circle let their kids throw anything, so Amelia is good there!
 
As with Tgal and Pink we don''t do food/meal battles. DS isn''t going to let himself starve so if he''s not hungry at lunch then we wait to feed him until he is. Luckily, he''s on a pretty good schedule with meal times so we don''t run into this a lot, but sometimes he just won''t want to sit down and eat so we will eat at the table and let him play.

We also let DS "help" us do things like empy the dishwasher, fold laundry or put groceries away even if he makes a mess or isn''t really being much of a help. As long as he''s not destroying anything then it''s okay with us.

We''ve also started letting DS have juice. We held out for a long time! He only gets the V8 fruit/veggie 100% juice blend so I don''t feel too bad about it. DS knows where it is in the fridge and will go get it if you ask him to.
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He''s such a cutie!
 
We let our kids get away with staying up past their bedtimes. The rule is that they have to be dressed for bed, teeth brushed, and in their rooms by 8:15. After that, they can do as they please. My older son always reads and my younger one always colors and writes stories. As long as they stay upstairs, I don''t mind. By doing this, they each have quiet time to themselves (which they don''t often have because they''re always playing) and also they''re always involved in activites that stir their creativity.

Once they''re upstairs, DH and I watch shows that aren''t appropriate for kids. The only day I''m a bit overly anxious to get them right to bed is when Lost is on, but that show is almost done and it''s really beginning to suck.

I don''t like my kids snacking before dinner, but often cannot control that. Another rule is if they do not like one of the foods I''ve made, they must have an apples since it''s healthy.

I''m REALLY laid back in most of my parenting, but REALLY need that night time, plus some GROWN UP TV. God, how much Nickelodeon can one take?
 
I''m not a parent but I have a fun story to share about my aunt and uncle who have a 7 yr old daughter and twin 4 yr old daughters. They don''t really do much disciplining at all, they''re all vilde chaya, but the BEST is this:

The 7 year old and one of the twins is a really stubborn dresser. They want to wear what they want, and they throw tantrums if they don''t get to choose their outfits. My aunt an uncle gave up this battle years ago, so you''ll often see the kids wearing the most hilarious outfits I''ve ever seen. I always think of the Adam Sandler movie Big Daddy when I see the outfits.
 
Poor kid doesn''t get away with much, now I try to think about what I could write here...

Food is non negotiable- eaten at the table / high chair and no substitutes offered, but it has never really been a battle, so maybe I''m the one who''s getting away with that! She likes mealtimes and enjoys eating, but I''m going to count that as a huge parenting success and proof of my philosophy, rather than a lucky quirk, right?!
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Tantrums, I suppose. She gets away with them to the extent that I can''t actually prevent them happening, but I never give her the thing she wanted that sparked it off.
 
I limit our food battles. If he doesn''t eat supper, he can''t have a cookie. But I don''t make him finish everything on his plate. He just has to make an attempt and try everything.

The other non-battle is what he wants to wear. As long as it''s clean, he can wear it. He loves to wear one shirt 3x a week. It''s actually too small but he loves it. He''s developing a style of his own which is funny at 4yrs old.
 
I don't pick the food battle.

I don't pick the sleep battle. I FINALLY figured out that when I stop nagging them about going to sleep, they do it on their own. So now, they pretty much are on a schedule that was loosely dictated by me but they think they came up with it so it works for all of us!

I don't pick the clothing battle. Lily has been a diva about her clothes and shoes for at least a year now, maybe longer. It's not worth getting upset over. So what if she's wearing a striped shirt, plaid skirt and polka dot stockings?! Or a tutu, striped leggings, Hello Kitty tshirt and boots?!?!?! I try to point her in the right direction when she's heading toward real fashion don'ts but then I noticed all the kids in her preschool are dressed just as crazily! It makes her feel independent ant nobody's getting hurt so who cares?

I have a fairly laid back parenting style in general so I try not to battle over things that aren't harmful or detrimental to their health or safety.
 
I love the outfits little ones come up with when they dress themselves :) super cute
I don''t have kids, but I think that will be one of my non-battles as well when I do
 
Yes, outfits are fine - she can wear what she wants, not picking that battle! DH has this thing that it isn''t good for her to wear the same shoes all the time, so he wants to put a different pair on every day. She wants to wear the pink ones every day. Guess who''s winning so far?
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When I said I picked the food battle, I didn''t mean I made her eat everything - I just don''t let her have her pick at every meal, or she''d have scurvy by now.
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Everything is a battle with my little monkey. I probably do let her get away with too much b/c I am often too tired, too laid-back or sometimes just don''t care. She often wants to take random things to bed (a plastic easter egg, book, flashlight, her backpack...) as long as she can''t choke on it I don''t care. I just want her to sleep. I have been known time to time from letting her have a cookie dinner. Yes, I am a bad mom. I try not to do it too often but when I am tired and frustrated and she pushes, pushes and pushes me I have been known to cave to get some peace and quiet. Now TGal will de-friend me b/c I have let T jump on furniture before
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I know this is a big PS mom no, no but it is what it is. I would not, however, let her jump on YOUR furniture. I am sure there are other things. I do give her a choice of clothes but can''t say I give her free reign yet. Guess I do have a hidden controlling side and would not let her wear her pjs to the airport this morning. She was pissed.

The battles I ALWAYS pick (and make sure I win) are when she is hurting herself, hurting someone else, someone is hurting her or is doing something dangerous.
 
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