What did you love about your wedding? What was an abject failure?

[whitby_2773]

So after reading Freke's thread about embarrassing situations and faux pas (Brides World Wide and Grooms Grooves) and seeing all the responses - many about things going belly up at weddings - i spent some time, for the first time in a LONG time, thinking about my own wedding - the things that well and the things that....didn't.

some things i loved...

1) i was married on the first day of spring

2) the bouquets/church/reception/my garland flowers were AWESOME
3) the converted monastery where we had the reception
4) my bridesmaid's dresses
5) the fabric in my dress (hand embroidered in paris - i was so excited, i could barely STAND the fabulousness of that!)
6) my sister, scary tho she can be, realizing i was short of cash and fabricating a reason to buy some left over bridesmaid fabric i had
7) the food at the reception - WOW!
my wedding cake - decorated with sugar Australian bush flowers - incredible. this was made by one of the best cake decorators in the country who lived across the road, and given to us as a gift - great gift!!
9) my father who picked up the entire tab for the reception and for my dress. no questions asked.
10) the groom

some things not so great....

1) my mother, who had died 3 years before, not being there to see me walk down the aisle
2) my dressmaker who didn't do what i asked her to do because she thought her ideas looked better
3) my bridesmaids' garlands which had completely different flowers (carnations instead of roses) in them because the florist couldn't bring them in for what she quoted
4) my father's new wife who was a stranger to me, yet who figured at the wedding as my 'mother'
5) my father's speech which never mentioned my mother and which generated all sorts of problems with people there who had loved her
6) the photographer, who stood us under trees for ever photo, giving us speckled shadows across our faces in Every. Single. Shot. not kidding - EVERY photo.
7) my veil (too short)
the fact that we had a large, traditional, conservative wedding - whereas i wanted 20 close friends and family at the most, married somewhere gorgeous, then all seated at one, long, casual table for lunch. unfortunately i was pushed into 100 guests with the traditional church service beforehand. the general structure was SO not me.
9) my FIL who thought we were marrying too young and had caused problems re this beforehand. he decided when we were leaving the reception for the honeymoon was the right time to try to sort this out. in front of 100 people. yeah - um - no.
10) the horrible case of flu i had. 2 days before the wedding i had no voice whatsoever, and i was still sick on the day. but it generated my favorite photo from my entire wedding; taken at the reception of tim and i at the bridal table, my head is on his shoulder, my eyes are closed, and i'm pretty sure i've nodded off. tim has the biggest possible grin on his face and is holding up his fork and spoon, ready for third helpings of bombe alaska!

what were the high points and the low points of your day? what went well? what do you wish you could do-over? what was a total failure, and what still brings a light to your eye when you remember it?

(by the way - if i could do it all over again, i would do it TOTALLY differently!)

 

[geckodani]

Let''s see.

Things I loved:

1. The location. We got married at the Maui Tropical Plantation. It was GORGEOUS.
2. The "reception." Drums of the Pacific Luaua at the Hyatt. I booked 30 seats and we partied it up.
3. The photos of me smiling so hard my cheeks are twitching.
4. My Brother in Law''s smile as he''s walking me down the aisle and I''m completely ignoring the photographer and craning my head to see the groom.
5. Our photos, most of them are stunning.
6. My flowers - red, orange, yellow, and purple orchids.
7. The little girl at the luaua, that tugged on my dress and said, "You look veeeery pretty!"
8. Our giant Samoan minister. He was hilarious.

Not so much fun:

1. Our original minister went in for emergency heart surgery and had to be replaced (he''s okay).
2. My father (passed away) wasn''t there to see it.
3. One of the groomsman booked their hotel over 2 hours away from everyone else by mistake.
4. The best man has a white T-shirt under his hawaiian shirt. It drives me nuts in photos.
5. Our photographer that tried to cheat us out of $500. It was an ordeal that cost us an entire day of our honeymoon.
6. The pimple of doom that popped up the day before the wedding,

 

[Sha]

My wedding really didn''t go as I had planned... where do I begin?

I made the bad decision of asking an acquaintance (a former Pageant girl) to do my hair and make-up for my wedding, instead of doing it myself (which I could have done quite easily and comfortably). It was a disaster! My hair was a puffy mess and I looked like a geisha after my make-up was done - 15 minutes before we were due to leave for the wedding! I have several pics that my MOH took of me getting ready (you know...the ''excited, happy'' getting ready pics_ where you can see my pained expression on my face, after I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. When I told her I was uncomfortable with it she thought I was overreacting. About 10 minutes before I left for the wedding my MOH and I spent a while in the bathroom scrubbing most of it off. It still didn''t look like ''me'' - but at least it was halfway presentable.

It rained on the morning of my wedding - and the garden ceremony I had always wanted had to be moved indoors...

Oh, and I wore a ''diamond'' headband as my hairpiece instead of a veil. But it was so tight I had an awful headache by the time the ceremony was over! I could barely keep a smile on my face during the picture-taking and reception...all I could think of was hurrying home and ripping it out!

What did I love about my wedding? Hmmm....marrying the man I loved. Also - it was the low-key, private affair that we wanted - just about 15 guests in all.

 

[monarch64]

Wedding=everything was fabulous/gorgeous/perfect

Marriage=abject failure.

 

[Italiahaircolor]

Loved

1. My groom!
2. My dress...which I stressed over for months. I felt really good in it.
3. My cake. Banana split flavors (what''s more summer than a big ol'' banana split?!) with 24kt gold dusted fondant in a mosaic pattern to look shattered glass. I loved it!
4. My bridesmaid dresses...I thought they were great, and they all looked lovely.
5. Our favors...I thought they were cute and clever. People really liked it, too!
6. Our sweet bar. It had everything under the sun!
7. My videographer...it was amazing, and worth every penny.
8. My coordinator/planner...she kept me sane.
9. Franklin...he sang for the ceremony...and he was incredible.
10. Last but certianly not least, my parents...who made everything possible and smiled the whole time. What a blessing.

Failed

1. My DJ. I had a specific list of music I wanted played at the key moments...did that happen? No. Not even close.
2. 2 of my bridesmaids...what a let down.
3. My dress got stepped on by a waiter...and the @$$ ripped out! But Marks'' aunts were able to sew it up!
4. The flowers. I spent a fortune...but they were all wrong. So wrong. It bothered me all night.

 

[D&T]

Loved -

perfect day sunny, warm, clear blue sky (hailed, rained, snowed, the next day- whew!)
Dress, Cake, Flowers except one of my step broke in mine (very-noticeable)

Failed-
Dumb Brother - not showing up to his little''s sister''s wedding!

due to one dumb dumb issues over a dress? for his wife?

(cultural thing so he says- I guess)
Construction going on in the background even though much was hidden from the trees but you can''t block out the noise- though the center said they would request the construction site to halt for a bit while the ceremony took place. Apparently the request was not done!
One of my newly French manicured toe nails broke off (that was my first and probably the last time getting french tips for my toes)
The cake was delicious (The two bites we had) we had a slice cut out for me and DH, took two bites of it, left the table to greet some guest, only to come back to an empty plate? because we were moving and the drive was 16 hours long, we decided to serve every bit of the cake to the guest except to save a slice for us, that didn''t happen since someone snatched our half eaten slice right from under us.

 

[parrot tulips]

I always wanted to elope. I don''t love being the center of attention, and the idea of spending so much money on one day (albeit, a very special one), always troubled me. But...it was important to both of our parents, especially since we''re both the first born, and to hubby, so I went ahead and planned away. Although a part of me still wishes we eloped, the wedding went so beautifully that there are very few regrets indeed.

Things I loved:
-The venue. Old army barracks that have been converted into an artist center, less than half a mile from the beach, nestled in the hills, complete with roaming deer and wild turkeys. No neighboring buildings.
-The food. AMAZING. All local, organic ingredients, prepared both artfully and deliciously, and the menu we picked pleased everyone.
-The service. I had guests telling me they felt like royalty because the staff was so incredible.
-The flowers. Gorgeous. I gave the florist very little input other than bright, summery, and not overly structured. She exceeded my expectations.
-The DJ. If I didn''t have a friend standing in as a DOC, he would have been the next best thing, because he was so on top of making sure everything ran smoothly, and on schedule. He also played fantastic music, and cut the songs for our ceremony in just the right places.
-The photographers. The photographer''s wife, and the second shooter''s girlfriend, both dabble in photography. Last minute we were asked if we''d mind if they brought their "assistants." 4 shooters for the price of 2 - YES! They were also testing out a new concept (for them) - a crazy booth (complete with fun props). We agreed to be their guinea pigs. Our guests had a blast with this, and we got some fantastic pictures of friends/family that we never would have gotten otherwise.
-Friends/Family - everyone was bursting with compliments, laughing, and having a good time. Exactly what every bride & groom hopes for.
-Our budget. It wasn''t a 6 figure budget, and I have friends who spent 3-4 times what we did, but it was generous enough that I don''t feel like I compromised on anything. It just took a little research, and a little DIY.
-Our cake was beautiful and delicious. Enough said.

Regrets:
-Hubby''s mother had passed away about a year before I met him, so not having her there left a hole. It was rough seeing the sadness in J and his brother''s eyes from time to time.

 

[atroop711]

the things I loved:

1. that my family was there for me (2 of the most important ppl in my life died shortly after the wedding)
2. I really liked the venue (food was great and the staff were all fabulous)
3. Loved my dress ( my parents paid for that and my head piece)
4. loved that we were able to have our dream wedding and pay for it on our own (without going into debt)
5. loved my suite at the Essex House for our wedding night
6. loved our 2 wk honeymoon
7. loved my flowers
8. loved having an outdoors ceremony
9. loved getting married under what looked like a Chupa (gorgeous flowers all over)
10. that it didn't rain
things that I didn't like:

1. the DJ (couldn't afford a band) wasn't great
2. getting scammed by the Limo co. (had me sign papers during taking pics and changed their END TIME...which put us into overtime which we used them for an hour less than we paid
3. my husbands cousin was a groomsman and changed into daisy duke short at the end of my reception and WALKED INTO THE RECEPTION AREA while we danced our last dance

4. the limo driver didn't know how to get to the Westbury Gardens for our pics so we were late (I'm very anal about being on time)

5. HATED that I had my period (end of the cycle but still)
6. didn't like how my hair looked once the veil was off.
7. that it was the hottest day of the year (98 degrees) and humid

I didn't mention the pics...they were OK...didn't love them nor hate them...just ok

 

[Haven]

I loved:
- The groom. (And still do.

)
- The place. (My family''s synagogue, very special to us.)
- The day. (Independence Day. Love the irony. It also happened to be a gorgeous day.)
- The ceremony. (So special. Performed by people who loved us, with our nearest and dearest up on the bimah with us.)
- The look on DH''s face all day long, every time he saw me. It was like a day-long swoon. So sweet.
- The guests.
- The food. The band. The flowers. The decor. It was all beautiful.
- The dress, hair, and makeup. I felt so beautiful.
- The feel of it all. It was so "us," whatever that means. It was.

Abject failure:
- The photographer and videographer. They absolutely failed to capture even one tiny bit of the beauty of that day. I still can''t look at our wedding photos, and I don''t think we''ll ever have a wedding album. I hope I never lose my memory.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Mine wasn''t the standard wedding since DH and I eloped in Vegas.

Looking back, I am fine that we did that. I just wished we had researched wedding chappels rather than spending our time focusing on where to stay. At the time, the Luxor was brand new and we stayed there.

I''d have prefered a prettier chapel.

Same as Haven, the major failure was the photographer. We had the misfortune of being expected to use a family photographer because if we didn''t, it would offend his wife (close relative on Dh''s side), so he took the photos. In every one of them, they''re taken at an angle leaving DH and I squinting. The shots are just terrible. They''re shoved away in a box somewhere. To express the lack of his skill - JC Penny fired him for being a lame photographer.

 

[steph72276]

I can say without a doubt that it was a perfect day and everything was as I had imagined it.

Things that went great:

~It was the last day of November, so that time of year can be iffy as far as weather goes in GA, but it was nice and warm and we had the most amazing blue skies.

~The flowers were beautiful and way beyond my expectations

~The string quartet was awesome and gave me chills as I listened to them play for the crowd while I was in the bride's room.

~The ceremony was great...done by my long-time pastor

~My bridesmaids were wonderful, 4 friends since elementary school and my 2 new sister in laws

~The photography was just fantastic and looked like out of a magazine

~The country club was so beautiful (they had just decorated it for Christmas...my favorite time of year!)

~The cake was beyond amazing!

~The food was delish (although we didn't eat any until later on that night in our suite)

~The music was awesome...people were on the dance floor the entire night


Things that didn't go quite so great:

~The unity candle took forever to light and it was too high. I had to stand on my tiptoes to try to reach it and then stand there until it eventually lit.

~My mother in law was bawling and sniffling (loudly) the entire ceremony. I know she was just emotional seeing her son get married, but geez!

~My wedding band was too tight and he only got it on halfway (I woke up with swollen fingers for some reason).

~I was missing my grandfathers and a grandmother and wished they could have been there to see it

 

[April20]

I''m really not a wedding person and would have been happy with a few friends in the back yard... but somehow I ended up with about a larger wedding and 140 invites. It really turned out lovely and was not the horror that I thought a wedding of more than 50 guests could be.

Things I loved:

1. The flowers. Family that has a floral business did them for us as a gift and they were AMAZING. I have NO idea what they were, I gave them full reign, but I could not have been more pleased.
2. It was a relaxed event- while attire was more formal and traditional, how we chose to organize the night was not. It made it a lot less stressful for me.
3. Our photographer- I really wanted non-traditional, photojournalistic style photographer and had one lined up. Who fell thru the week before the wedding. A friend of ours that was already coming is a photographer as well and stepped in to do it last minute. She did a beautiful job and I couldn''t be happier. (She didn''t charge us either!)
4. Food- we had tons and tons of good food.
5. Cake- It tasted great and looked beautiful. Exactly what I wanted.

Things that were not so great....

Honestly not much- I had no real set expectations and was pleased with how everything turned out. The only thing that was a disappointment were several good friends and some family that could not come at the last minute due to various health concerns (one aunt was seriously ill and hospitalized and some family stayed with her; another friend was very pregnant and the doctor didn''t want her to travel 5 hours by car, etc).

Other than that, I have ZERO negative memories from my wedding.

 

[TravelingGal]

I loved it all. My only sadness is that my dad''s health was deterioriating and he could not be there.

 

[LaurenThePartier]

I was another one who got married in Vegas, and I only had about 6 weeks total to plan everything, so I feel like some of it was way too rushed to feel completely in love with it, but it was essentially a big elopement, so I''m thrilled that I''m as happy with as much as I am.

Things I loved:

1. My husband. He looked adorable in that tux.
2. My parents/grandparents could make it on such short notice.
3. My dress. It was a pretty dress, bought at a serious discount on Ebay.
4. The chapel. The Bellagio has a really beautiful chapel.
5. My sister''s bridesmaid dress. I asked her to go find a brown dress, she found a killer one!
6. My flowers. They were stock Bellagio wedding chapel Calla lillies and roses, but I loved that they wrapped them with brown and blue ribbon. I really wish I had a good pic of them.
7. One picture from the Bellagio photographer, the one with our foreheads touching.

Things that were abject failures:

1. My alterations weren''t that great, and my dress didn''t look quite polished enough to me.
2. My Bellagio photographer - no pictures of details (like my bouquet) and really just didn''t like more than one or 2 of the shots we took. My FIL did a better job than the photographer.
3. Forgetting my brooch for my bouquet. That happens when you travel to and from a wedding, though.

 

[jstarfireb]

I wouldn''t consider anything from my wedding an abject failure (maybe I''m a Pollyanna, but I wouldn''t!). But a few things went wrong that probably could have been avoided...

Loved:

-The food was fabulous, and the cake was not only beautiful but delicious! Nothing worse than a beautiful but dry and unsatisfying wedding cake.

-Bridesmaid dresses looked great

-Dad, MOH, and BM gave great toasts

-Bouquets were really unique

-It didn''t rain!!! It rained the whole week before and much of the week after, but not on my wedding day!

-FI''s cute nervousness during the vows. He couldn''t remember them, so he wrote them down, and when he was taking out the paper, he blurted out "I need Cliff''s Notes!" He was visibly shaking...it was just adorable.

-Photographer did a great job for a very reasonable rate, and we got a 2nd photog for free because he was a trainee!

-Couldn''t be happier with the DJ, and they also took pictures and put together a great DVD slideshow.


Disliked:

-Letting my mom, FI, and MOH push me into changing my dress from one that was completely "me" to one that was a lot more "them." It worked out fine in the end with a simple alteration, but it was tainted to me.

-The venue didn''t tell me about something that happened EVERY Mother''s Day (=my wedding date) in the area: the Mother''s Day Truck Convoy, where all the truckers start honking their horns as they drive from one city to another, and somehow this raises money for Make A Wish. Good cause, but I really wish someone had told me not to schedule an outdoor wedding for that day. Luckily, they started after the ceremony...but it could have been a disaster!

-It rained up to the day before the wedding, and although the weather was beautiful during the wedding itself, there were major heel sinking issues!

-I couldn''t afford the urban museum venue I really loved and had to get married in my hometown, a rural setting. The upshot was that by coming home to get married, my parents then offered to pay for most of the wedding (they wouldn''t pay if it was in any other city). I''m saving the museum for a vow renewal once I have more money!

-Wireless microphones + wind = fail. I wish there would have been a better way to amplify our voices for the ceremony!

-We can''t dance...at all. Even if we would have had the time to take lessons, it wouldn''t have helped. There''s really no hope for us. So the formal dances were pretty awkward. I would have done without them, but the parents insisted.

-My skin was perfectly clear until the week before the wedding, when I made the unwise decision to get a facial from a new esthetician. She used some sort of pig placenta product that gave me two huge, painful, cystic pimples on my chin. Luckily they were on their way down by the wedding date and concealed easily.

-Honeymoon was fabulous, but the new husband actually behaved pretty poorly regarding some hotel issues and ended up arguing with me quite a bit. Nothing worse than fighting during your honeymoon.

 

[Lilac]

Things I Loved:
1. My husband.

All I wanted from that day was to marry the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and that was what we did, so what could be bad?

2. My parents were so supportive (both emotionally and financially - they paid for the whole wedding and we are soo grateful)
3. The band was amazing and we got compliments on them the whole night and the past 5 months since the wedding
4. The singer we picked was incredible
5. Everyone said the food was amazing (but unfortunately we didn''t get to eat anything at our wedding we were so busy!)
6. The hall - I always dreamed of getting married there
7. The weather - it was the beginning of February and every single weekend before it snowed a LOT and about 2 weeks later we had a huge snowstorm, but on the day of our wedding it was sunny and 60 degrees
8. The flowers - our florist totally exceeded our expectations and did a BEAUTIFUL job
9. The color - I picked purple and the bridesmaids were in a dark royal purple and our moms and sisters were in a lighter shade and it looked wonderful in person and in pictures (and everyone had argued with me about the color because nobody wanted to wear purple, but in the end everyone said it looked amazing)
10. My hair and makeup - I was very happy with how they came out
11. Our first dance - this was one of the best moments of the night. I loved our song and the whole dance and those few moments were just like I had pictured them from the time we met.
12. Our wedding night - we stayed in a beautiful hotel and it was everything I dreamed it would be (we had waited until our wedding night, and it was so special)

Things not so great..:
1. I wish it could have been a little smaller - we had over 500 people and I didn''t know half of them - I wish it could have been smaller and more intimate with people DH and I really felt close to.
2. The photographer - terrible. Refused to take ANY shots outdoors even though it was a gorgeous day and beautiful scenery outside for pictures. I was really really disappointed on the day with him and when we got the pictures it''s almost painful to look at most of them because he just was so bad. He missed a ton of key shots and moments and I wish we had gone with someone else.

My husband surprised me last week for my birthday and hired a new photographer, made me appointments for hair and makeup, made me a manicure appointment, and got my dress and his tux ready again and we went to take pictures together all dressed up like it was our wedding day. He arranged with the hall we got married at for us to come back and take outdoor pics - hopefully we get them next week, and if they''re good maybe I can get past the terrible job our original photographer did because all I really wanted were some great shots outside of my husband and I all dressed up on our wedding day

 

[MonkeyPie]

I didn''t have a "real" wedding (courthouse) so I can''t say much...but I DO have to say, I am so very sorry for the amount of you that complained about your photographers! Reading this thread made me feel terrible, and it makes me wonder why so many of them fail.

 

[luvthemstrawberries]

Date: 7/10/2009 1:39:47 PM
Author: Lilac

My husband surprised me last week for my birthday and hired a new photographer, made me appointments for hair and makeup, made me a manicure appointment, and got my dress and his tux ready again and we went to take pictures together all dressed up like it was our wedding day. He arranged with the hall we got married at for us to come back and take outdoor pics - hopefully we get them next week, and if they''re good maybe I can get past the terrible job our original photographer did because all I really wanted were some great shots outside of my husband and I all dressed up on our wedding day

Aw Lilac this is so sweet!!

Make sure he gets lots of brownie points for doing that... such a great thing to do for you!!

 

[Lilac]

Date: 7/10/2009 1:55:52 PM
Author: luvthemstrawberries

Date: 7/10/2009 1:39:47 PM

Author: Lilac


My husband surprised me last week for my birthday and hired a new photographer, made me appointments for hair and makeup, made me a manicure appointment, and got my dress and his tux ready again and we went to take pictures together all dressed up like it was our wedding day. He arranged with the hall we got married at for us to come back and take outdoor pics - hopefully we get them next week, and if they''re good maybe I can get past the terrible job our original photographer did because all I really wanted were some great shots outside of my husband and I all dressed up on our wedding day

Aw Lilac this is so sweet!!

Make sure he gets lots of brownie points for doing that... such a great thing to do for you!!

Yeah, he''s really amazing

I posted about it in BWW about a week ago. Can''t wait for the pics to come back, I''m reallllly hoping they''re great.

I also find it interesting (and sad) how many people are so disappointed with their photographers. My best advice to new brides is to really check out photographers, have engagement photos taken, and specify what kinds of pics you want BEFORE the day of the wedding.

 

[jstarfireb]

Also wanted to add another thing I loved: that my husband finally agreed to meet me on the wedding day before the ceremony for private pictures. He was initially one of those types who didn''t want to see the bride in her dress before the ceremony, but I kept working on him until he caved. And he and I both agreed that it was a priceless moment.

 

[JSM]

Wow, Whitby, I can't even imagine. I have to say you sound like an amazing woman!

I had an absolutely wonderful wedding day. Even the 'bad' things weren't that bad.

Great -

- Photographer. I was going to go with someone cheap, to save money, but decided not to skimp. SO GLAD FOR IT! He was incredible.
- Limo. The scheduling wouldn't have worked without it, and the driver was awesome!
- Eloping. Me, the husband, and a wonderful day. It felt like we could really focus on each other.
- Baseball! Perfect way to celebrate our union.

Not so great -

- Hair. It was pretty but not what I wanted. I have a big face and the hair accentuated it.
- Dress. The dress was ordered too big, ordered in the wrong color, and not altered the way I wanted it. It turned out okay, but it wasn't what I envisioned.
- Shoes. So, I got cheap shoes because of my budget. Wound up TEARING the skin on my ankles and by the end of the night, I had blood all over the bottom of my dress. Thankfully it came out of the outer layer after cleaning, but the blood stains are never coming out of the crinoline.
- Food. So, even though we didn't have other people to worry about besides us, we STILL forgot to eat! By the end of the night we were ready to faint from low blood sugar. Luckily NYC has no shortage of places to find dinner at 1:30 am.
- Interviews. Apparently, showing up to the opening game at Yankee Stadium in wedding garb will gather attention. It was fun, but I was so overwhelmed from the day I'm pretty sure I made myself look like an idiot.

Though it's nice to have a newspaper article that mentioned our wedding day (even if they screwed up our ages)!

Even though I'm complaining a bit, I shouldn't be. Honestly, the feeling from that day will never fade, it was something I'd never trade.

 

[Clio]

Things I loved:

1. My dress. It was beautiful.
2. The food. OMG, so good.
3. The cakes. I do honestly think the bride''s cake was the best wedding cake I''ve ever had, and the groom''s cake was definitely the best carrot cake I''ve had.
4. The flowers. One of my grandmother''s friends made beautiful arrangements for the venue, mostly with flowers from people''s yards. I love small towns!
5. The photographer. We used the same photographer that my mother and aunt used (and a couple of years ago my cousin used him as well). The photos are so nice, and I liked the continuity.
6. The venue. We had the ceremony and reception in a beautiful historic house (and because my grandmother''s garden club owns it, we got it for the entire day for a ridiculously cheap price).
7. My 6-year-old-cousin caught the bouquet after instructing me to "throw short." The pictures we have of this are priceless.
8. Despite a problem when the original fabric we chose was discontinued, the bridesmaids dresses were lovely.
9. Steve and I didn''t let ourselves get pressured into doing things that weren''t right for us.
10. It was beautiful and cost $5000.

Things that weren''t so great:

1. My hair. A friend of my mother''s made my beautiful veil, and she did my hair as well. It was a beautiful hairstyle that was very suited to my dress and the venue, but instead of light tendrils around my face, she made these weird hair wing things. So odd.
2. The chairs the venue had were ugly, and the rental chairs available in town were, we thought, too rickety for many of our elderly guests. So, we went with the ugly chairs. The reality is that once everyone was sitting in them, you couldn''t really see the chairs, and they don''t show much in the photos. So, not really a big deal.
3. I wish I''d worn a second crinoline under my dress.
4. The venue. I loved the house we used, but there is a lovely little church just outside town that was founded by an ancestor. Honestly, my mother and I had forgotten that it existed, but having been to events there over the past few years, I do kind of wish we''d remembered about it. Similarly, there is another historic house in town that an ancestor built that I would have liked to have used (or at least looked in to). The "wrong" garden club owns it however, and my grandmother wouldn''t even let me call them! My cousin did get married there a couple of years ago, and it was lovely. Still, my venue was beautiful; it just didn''t have the family connection that the other one has.
5. My mother hurried us to change and leave because people might want to leave and it''s rude to leave before the bride and groom do. As a result, we didn''t get to have any cake at the wedding. (the back story is that my mother really doesn''t like to stay a long time at weddings and figures other people don''t either)
6. We got married just out of college, so many of our friends just weren''t able to make the trip to our wedding.
7. Ditto most of Steve''s family. Honestly, I think it''s because I was the first non-Vietnamese spouse in the family. That still bothers me a little, but his family has been welcoming in other ways (plus, it''s been 14 years), so I need to just get over myself.
8. This is the most important one: my grandmother was very sick and wasn''t able to go to the wedding. She died very shortly after the wedding. My last memory of her is a week before, sitting in her dining room with her as she counted out luncheon napkins to use at the reception and pulled out the silver cake tray. She was so involved at every stage of planning, and I am still so sad that she wasn''t able to be at the wedding.

Most of the things I didn''t like were pretty minor, and I still love my wedding. I don''t think it''s the best wedding I''ve ever been to (that prize is split between my cousin and a college friend), but it was great.

 

[KimberlyH]

What I loved:

The groom
The guests
The food
The location
The music
The photographer
The honeymood

Everything went as I hoped it would with one exception:

My then 87 year old mother-in-law, who had Alzheimer''s, broke her back 3 weeks before the wedding and was having a horrible day. The day before she was totally aware and looking forward to the wedding, the day of she had no idea what was going on. We hired a nurse -- who showed up in a graphic tee and ripped jeans -- to bring her as she was still hospitalized and he was late picking her up which resulted in 30 phone calls (literally) in 20 minutes when we were trying to take pictures. She didn''t know who I was and wasn''t sure what was going on. A good family friend ended up sitting inside with her during cocktail hour because she was confused and overwhelmed and I know she didn''t enjoy herself. I so wanted her to have a wonderful night and enjoy the celebration and it was so sad for my husband that didn''t happen.

 

[HollyS]

Loved:

The florals were everything I had hoped they would be.
The classical guitarist.
The cakes and the food.
The location. Rustic, but romantic.
The inn''s staff, who took care of EVERYTHING! My family and I did not lift a finger!
My dress.
My hubby.

Not So Much: (but NOT an abject failure)

The minister pronouncing us "Mr. and Mrs. (My Maiden Name).

It was funny, though.
The wind kept banging the chapel doors shut as we were trying to walk in for the processional. Also funny.
The chapel was a wee bit tiny. People were sitting really close.
I didn''t get to hear anything of the guitarist except processional and recessional.

Too windy to really do pictures outside.
My photog did not follow the list of photos I gave her to do, and so she missed close-up shots of our table, a photo of the inn, and many more.

 

[wolftress]

Great thread! Whitby, I am so sorry your mum wasn''t mentioned at your wedding, but I''m sure she was smiling down on you from wherever she was.

Loved:
1. My wonderful extended family flew from Singapore to Melbourne to celebrate with DH and I on our wedding day, even though none of them had ever met him. It was unexpected and I will always be grateful to them for this.
2. My beautiful wedding gown
3. Our yummy chocolate mud wedding cake
4. Our huge bridal suite. The staff at the wedding venue put out chocolates, massage oils, bubble bath, strawberries, champagne and all sorts of special indulgences for us to find when we went back to our room
5. My father''s and father-in-law''s moving and funny speeches
6. DH singing Snow Patrol''s Chasing Cars to me at the reception
7. The velvety red roses in my bridal bouquet
8. Beautiful diamond necklace that my parents had specially made for me
9. My Asian-style evening gown that my dad designed

Did not love:
1. DH''s brother''s speech that embarassed me in front of all my conservative Asian relatives with too much information about DH''s and my sex life

Why he thought that was appropriate on our wedding day I will never understand. All is forgiven now, but DH and I were furious on the day, and my parents were very upset.
2. Our photographer forgetting to take photos of us with our parents. We don''t have a single photo with either set of parents on our wedding day. Our photos in general were quite disappointing. I can''t really look at them now without thinking the best photos from the day were ones taken by guests or relatives. They captured the special moments so much better than our photographer did.
3. My stylist charging me almost twice what she had previously quoted me to do hair/makeup for myself and attendants

All in all, more loves than do-no-loves, the only thing that still upsets me is the lack of family photos

 

[Clio]

Date: 7/10/2009 8:46:04 PM
Author: HollyS

Not So Much: (but NOT an abject failure)


The minister pronouncing us ''Mr. and Mrs. (My Maiden Name).

It was funny, though.

Oh dear, that is funny! At my wedding, the priest was so concerned about getting Steve''s last name right (it''s not pronounced anything like it''s spelled) that he mispronounced my (much, much easier) maiden name. I''ve always found that pretty funny.

 

[whitby_2773]

Thanks geckodani, sha, monnie (you black humor cracks me up!), Italia, D&T, parrot tulips, atroop, Haven, MC, steph, April, T-Gal, LaurenThePartier, jstarfireb, Lilac, MonkeyPie, luvthemstrawberries, SanDiegoLady, jsm, Clio, KimberlyH, HollyS and wolftress,

Interesting stories! But on balance, it looks like a) most people loved their wedding and b) most people did NOT love their photographer! I think there’s a message in this, actually, which I didn’t anticipate when I started the thread; if anything is going to go wrong, it will most likely be with the photographer. I thought the people who suggested putting plenty of research into the photographer, having photos done ahead of time to make sure he/she can produce the style you like and works well with you, and being very specific with the shots you wanted gave great advice.

One of my favorite ‘things that went wrong’ screw ups actually happened to someone I knew (as opposed to someone I saw on youtube etc). Keep in mind this was over 20 years ago before we all had mobile phones.

The bride’s father was deceased, so her FIL walked her down the aisle. Consequently, he went in the car with the bride. The groom went in a car with his groomsmen. The groom’s sister was a bridesmaid, so she was with the bride. Everybody went with somebody…except the mother of the groom. At the church, everyone thought she was sitting with ‘someone else’, while she was still at home, frantically on the phone, trying (unsuccessfully) to get a taxi on a Saturday morning. The end result was she missed the entire thing and nobody even noticed till the reception, at which point her husband realized she wasn’t anywhere to be found.

what are the odds??

Which just goes to show – whatever goes wrong, it can always be worse!

Thanks for sharing, ladies – have a great weekend!

 

[Gypsy]

LOVED:

Nearly everything. Seriously. Flowers, venue, wine, food, my ''look'', my groom, the cake, the most beautiful September day ever, our photographers and our ceremony. My MOH was great and so was our Best Man. It was a fabulous day.

Fair to Middling:
The DJ. There were some issues and there was plenty of blame to go around, mine, the catering manager''s, and his as well. But everyone had a good time, and no one really noticed but the two of us.

Abject Failure

Zipper on my dress. Get a metal zipper ladies, even if they have to rip the existing out and replace that puppy.
My shoes. I thought as long as they were comfortable I wouldn''t care. When I saw my wedding pictures I realized the the orthapedic shoe look might not have been the way to go.

 

[rainwood]

I enjoyed almost everything about the wedding, even the goof-ups because they are what make the funniest stories. The weather was great, the food was delicious, all the guests enjoyed themselves, and our wedding triggered the end of a family rift on DH''s side. I didn''t love my flowers, and I was really nervous about getting married and wanted to bolt. I was lucky in my choice of husbands though and that''s all that matters in the end.

We''re getting ready for a remodel and we found my wedding dress and hat which I thought we''d gotten rid of long ago. The dress and hat themselves looked fine, but the lace had yellowed. And I can''t believe how tiny I was! God, I''d love to have that figure back. I wouldn''t trade the 31 years for anything though.

 

[whitby_2773]

gypsy -

you know i love ya, and i'd never laugh at your misfortune, but...

the mind just boggles at 'orthopedic shoes'!! i'm not gonna ask to see a photo...but!

and to come clean on why i'm so interested in your shoes... i went down a similar path ie "not gonna have uncomfortable feet, not gonna wear ridiculous heels" etc. so i wore ballet flats - think *completely* flat! unfortunately, i also wore quite a large garland on my head (with it being the first day of spring an' all), so now, when i look back on the photos, i look like the top half of my body is 4 feet long, and the bottom half is about...18 inches.

not quite the look i was after.

other people tell me they can't see that i look cut off at the knees, but *I* can see it! seriously tho, i'm sure your shoes (and my 'top to bottom half' ratio!) weren't so bad; these things magnify in our own eyes, but rarely in other's. now, had they been lace up and you'd been wearing support hose, different story!

in the general scheme of things, tho, shoes are a small thing, and i'm glad so much of your day was exactly as you had dreamed.

but DJ's do seem to be one step behind photographers in the 'screw it up' stakes - sheesh!

rainwood - i'm sure you're pleased now that you didn't 'bolt' and that your husband was thrilled you made it all the way down the aisle! your post made me wanna drag out my dress; i'd love to do something now with that beautiful fabric - something OTHER than what the dressmaker did!!