Wedding Ring Hell-p

[crashdrlne]

My husband and I keep having a huge argument over him purchasing me a ring. We were married last June, we''re both in our 40''s and he makes plenty of money to purchase said ring. He had no money then. That has changed. He believes that I am a selfish, earthboud, materialistic woman for "wanting a token" of his love. His benchmark is $200.oo which I find incredibly offensive.

That''s the amount he paid for his first wife''s ring over 20 years ago. I really don''t want to stay married to a man that is soooooooo cheap...you find these things out later.

I have worked for two Tiffany & Co. Jewelry stores . I''m not asking for a $30K ring, I would be happy with a ring from Ziamond., patinum, $1500.00

Yes, he cooks and cleans. He contributes to the mess so he should contribute to the cleanup. However, I am tired of listenting to offensive remarks directed at me for marrying a guy that didn''t give me a ring. I refuse to defend his cheap-ness and this bothers him. I would especially be interested in a "man''s" point of view. My poll is this: Should I stay married or divorce?

 

[Pandora II]

Gosh, this seems quite a drastic question.

Can I ask how long you were with this man before you got married?

I also don''t understand if it''s a wedding-ring or an engagement-ring you are talking about here.

The fact you are asking such a big question suggests that this is not the only problem in your marriage. Have you considered going for counselling to try and resolve some issues - or at least to sort out what you want to do with your future?

 

[Maisie]

Maybe jewellery just isn''t a priority for him. A lot of men just don''t get the whole diamond ring thing. If he treats you well in every other respect, maybe you should leave this alone.

I would much rather have a husband who loves me and shows it every day, than a man who buys me a 100K ring but hits or abuses me.

Whats stopping you from buying yourself a lovely ring? I know I would if it was me!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 3/24/2008 1:47:39 PM
Author: Maisie

Whats stopping you from buying yourself a lovely ring? I know I would if it was me!

If this is really just about the ring, then ditto Maise.

I doubt it is about the ring, but about what this issue represents: his love and regard for you. That is a big issue and I suggest you seek help and advice from people who know you really well!

DD

 

[chizzy1982]

Crikey! Pandora is right that does seem like a very drastic descion............ is the ring issue the straw that has broken the camels back, so to speak?

Have you tried talking to him about how you feel? Have you asked why he is so set against getting you a ring?

Have you actually had a ring form him?

I would suggest you take a couple of days to yourself to have a really good think about what you want and to assess where you see your future going and with who.

I wish you the best of luck

Lizzie

 

[MoonWater]

Are we sure this isn''t a troll? It seems unreal.

 

[fisherofmengirly]

I wouldn''t think that a ring (having or not having) would be a point of contention to the point of considering divorce.

Maybe tell us if he''s "cheap" as you say in other areas of your life, as well.

I think marriage is meant to last forever, and I also think that marriage is about talking and communication and doing your best to make the other happy without turning yourself into someone you don''t love and respect.

 

[neatfreak]

This isn't about a ring, and don't make it out to be. It's about him not understanding your wants and needs, and therefore not understanding YOU.

I think before you make such a drastic decision you sit down with him and a therapist and get at the REAL issue, that you feel undervalued. Which is a perfectly valid feeling to have, but it seems that you are taking this feeling out on a poor ring, when really it is a bigger issue in your relationship.

Sorry to be so direct, but I really think there is no beating around the bush on this one if you're talking divorce over a ring.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

This is a VERY SUSPICIOUS thread, but I tend to be suspicious of all new members who begin with such dramatic posts.

The other post by crashdrlne is:

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/l-t-denny-and-international-jewelers-in-seattle.81450/

Possibly this woman (?) should use her discount to buy her own ring.

Anyhow, if your DH is that cheap, you should divorce him.

 

[Dreamer_D]

What is a troll exactly? Someone who fakes things to start conversations or get attention on the internet?? How odd...

DD

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 3/24/2008 10:18:38 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie
What is a troll exactly? Someone who fakes things to start conversations or get attention on the internet?? How odd...


DD

Yup. And everyone has been uber suspicious lately here...