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Wedding dress dilemma

M

MarionC

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Dec 9, 2013
Messages
6,244
i went dress shopping with my DD and she tried in a tailored haute couture dress that was stunningly perfect for her. Her second choice was nice, but sort of your average to be expected dress we have all seen a Milliion times.
The issue is that the #1 dress, although amazingly flattering in person, does not photograph as well as the #2 choice. Do we go for the stunning-in-person dress, or the nice-and-better-in-photos dress?
 
It will probably photograph very well with the right photographer. She should get the dress that makes her heart sing or she will most likely regret it....and buy two dresses...like I did. :lol-2:
 
Does your DD prefer to look better IRL or to photograph well? Meaning, is your DD big on social media and selfies and photos, so much so that the day after the wedding she will see the reality of her wedding dress only through the camera/video lens? Or, is she more of "in the moment, this is real, and this is my memory of this moment"?

Me, I'd take the dress I look best in IRL. No camera memorialized it, but to this day I have in my memory banks the exact moment my DH-to-be caught a glimpse of me in my wedding dress and I knew he saw me as the most beautiful I'd ever been. My dress was a huge part of that.

My two (younger) sisters would both choose the dress that looks better through a camera/video lens.

Not sure this helps you/your DD -- but perhaps she and you can reflect on how she prefers to remember and to be remembered, and how she prefers to see and to be seen. If the wedding is an event to be choreographed and recorded for posterity, then perhaps the dress that photographs well will best serve her wedding dreams.
 
I’d go for the dress that looked best IRL.

How many times do you look at the wedding photos afterward? I think in 40 years, we’ve looked at ours twice :lol:
 
Get the dress she looks best in for the wedding.

Go to a wedding studio to do a studio photo shoot in a variety of dresses.
 
Thanks!
 
HI:

:wavey: Hugs Mama!

cheers--Sharon
 
I wouldnt stress, the profesional photographer will be surprisingly good at finding spectacular ways of capturing the first dress. Beyond a doubt, if it looks good in real life then It will look just as good in the photos. What I would check is whether there are other factors at play, i.e. what is her husband envisioning? Is there a big price differential (even if she isnt paying for it this may be worrying her)? Does one need a lot of alterations, is it hard for her to envision? A list of pros and cons may help you work out whether anything else is weighing into her decision.
 
I agree - go with the dress that she loves herself in. There's a huge difference between what a dress looks like in a phone snap under store lights and a photograph taken by a pro.
 
Late to the game, but I would definitely go for dress #1. No doubt. She wants to not only look, but feel her best on that special day. So do what makes that happen. The photographer will handle the rest.
 
#1 :appl:
 
Any pictures???
 
She looks gorgeous in both of them @Jimmianne which one did she prefer?
 
Oh she looks stunning in both! :love: How exciting Jimmianne!
 
If she LOVES #1, the photographer’s job is to make sure that dress looks the same in photos, as it does in real life.
She should buy the gown that makes her feel like a bride, and that loves her back. It’s one day...for a few hours. She should feel absolutely beautiful the entire time she’s in it, and not have any doubt that it’s the right gown for her.
If dress #1 is that dress...then that’s the one she should buy. Make the photographer worry about the photos!
 
When I was shopping for my dress a million years ago you went to outlets in strip malls, but this place was an Event. We sat on couches in a huge dressing and were served champagne. We really had a memorable blast.
Austina, she loves the all-lace dress, but will have another hunt in Atlanta next week with her half-sis.
I am so happy for her to have this experience.
 

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I’m sure she’d look stunning in just about anything @Jimmianne , she’s certainly got a great figure .
 
They both look beautiful on her Jimmianne. It sounds like you had a perfect day looking at dresses with her. I’m glad she decided on the one she felt beautiful in.
 
Austina said:
I’m sure she’d look stunning in just about anything @Jimmianne , she’s certainly got a great figure .
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Thank you. She got it from her father’s side of the family. Too bad for me! Lol
 
Jimmianne said:
Good, that's the one she picked too!
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Did she cry? Did they “jack her up”, with the veil, earrings, etc? Did she say “Yes to the Dress”?!??

I loved my gown, when I first put it on. I tried on 5 gowns, total. The one I chose was #3. My (then) future SIL & my (then) 6 y/o daughter were my entourage. They BOTH cried, when I came out in #3. I’m type A, so I NEEDED to finish what I started, so I tried on the final 2 options. I put #3 back on, after seeing all 5 on me. The veil & other accessories were brought out, and BOOM...waterworks! She was mine, and she loved me back! Her price was perfect, too...lol!! Gotta love Outlet boutiques!! I had the same attention a bridal boutique provides (scheduled appt, concierge, one on one attention, etc), without the champagne. ;)2

If your DD had this experience, she found her dress!!
I’m SO HAPPY you were/are able to experience this with her. My mother has Alzheimer’s Disease, and is in a home under 24hr lockdown care. I missed her being able to experience dress shopping with me. My SIL took photos so we could share them with her. It was a very emotional day.
This is an experience to be cherished, forever by both of you!!
Big hugs, Mama!!! :mrgreen2::kiss2:
 
Matthews, I’m sorry about your Mom, so hard, always, but not having her with you for key life moments is even more difficult. Bless you.
I really am lucky my dd wanted me along. I love seeing her happy.
 
I also think that when you know your dress, you just 'know' if you know what I mean? I tired on so many dresses when I was looking. And when I was over it & done, the lady said "Could you try one on for me that I've never sold? It's in antique silk & it will be PERFECT with your golden skin tone..." And she pulled me & shoved me & laced me into the sample, and when I turned & looked I was like, yes, THIS is my dress!! It just felt right! It was weird! And I walked out of the changing room & my mother & best friend welled up, teary eyed, and said yes, this is the one....
 
She looks (to me remember) better in the first one on our left here. Either way she is beautifu, the wedding will be perfect. (think STRESS though, been there done this)
 
She can’t go wrong with either! Both are gorgeous and look like they were made for her!
 
Tekate said:
She looks (to me remember) better in the first one on our left here. Either way she is beautifu, the wedding will be perfect. (think STRESS though, been there done this)
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I like that one too. In person it had a wow factor; they opened the curtain and her girl friends and I literally gasped in unison. But I agree, anything she picks will be beautiful, and it is what makes her feel wonderful that matters.
 
Wow... Both dresses are gorgeous, but so is she, so she really can't go wrong with either... I agree that the all lace one is just stunning... it is more "elegant bridal" to me. She will look amazing!
 
Oh, I absolutely LOVE the all lace dress and think it will photograph fabulously!!! Looking more will help solidify the decision I am sure. But often people come back to the first one they loved and sometimes the first they tried on if they chose the dresses to try on. I hope my daughter chooses a dress like the all lace one! :love:
 
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