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strmrdr

Super_Ideal_Rock
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23,295
Husband Store


A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman
may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a
description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE!

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper
ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch . . . you may choose any man
from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot
go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. .

On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs
and love the Lord.

The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord,
and love kids.

The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord,
love kids, and are extremely good looking.

"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs,
love the Lord, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the
housework.

"Oh mercy me" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads: Floor 5 - These men have
jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the
housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign
reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor.

There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women
are impossible to please.

Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the
building, and have a nice day!
 

Dee*Jay

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Mar 26, 2006
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13,357
ROFL!
 

Kaleigh

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Nov 18, 2004
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29,570
Too funny!!!!
 

Cehrabehra

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jun 29, 2006
Messages
11,071
Okay I sent that to my best friend... she''s 37, "still" single, a psychologist... and not only ready to settle down, but picky and uncompromising as hell. I''m so evil hehehehehe
 

bee*

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 14, 2006
Messages
12,170
hehe I got that one by email the other day-I thought it was hilarious!!
 

shel

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Aug 28, 2006
Messages
141
Here''s the 2nd part of the joke:


A New Wives store opened across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.

The third through sixth floors have never been visited.....
 

BunniBling

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 1, 2007
Messages
120
Cehra:

I''m w/ you; sending this to my 34 year-old friend (whom I love!) that "just can''t seem to find the right guy". I''m a bad Bunni...


-J
 

Kaleigh

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Messages
29,570
Date: 3/23/2007 6:37:21 PM
Author: shel
Here''s the 2nd part of the joke:


A New Wives store opened across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.

The third through sixth floors have never been visited.....
LOL
 

Madam Bijoux

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 15, 2005
Messages
5,110

Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company''s party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn''t taste like alcohol at all. He didn''t even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong. Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose!


Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick!: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling!"


He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table eating. Jack asks, "Son. What happened last night?"


"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."


Confused he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?" His son replies, "Oh THAT! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, lady, I''m married!"


 
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