Upgrade eng ring or pendant? Thoughts needed.

[MichelleCarmen]

Hi everyone,

I''m going to trade in one of my diamonds. Right now, I have an E VS2 .414 in a pendant that I will be trading up for an H SI1 in the .65 - .74 size. I have to decide by June. Plenty of time, I hope.

I''m not a fan of larger diamonds and a dimond of that size may even be a bit more than I''m going to be comfortable with, however, I do have this opportunity for my anniversary, which is in June. . .so, I''m going to take it.

The deal is I''m entirely fine with my eng. diamond (which is a .42) and I''m sentimental. I don''t want to make a mistake with how I procede here. . .

My two options are the following:

* Keep my .42 (which I''ve had for over 14 years) as my eng. stone and use the larger .65-.74 as my new pendant (to replace the .414).
* Use the setting from the .414 and set the .42 from my eng. ring into that and use the new larger diamond to set into my eng/wedding set.

Keep in mind, I do not care if my eng. ring is smaller than a pendant. I''m just not sure if I''ll regret taking apart my eng ring or if I''ll regret not using the larger stone for my eng/wedding set.

So, any of you regret switching around your stones or have you faced a similar situation and ended up being happy with your decision?

My DH does NOT have a fancy to diamonds, so I cannot play around and if regret, put my .42 back into my wedding set. I have to decide ONCE to avoid irritating him. The more I fuss, the less he''ll support my next jewelry project. (He''s NOT a mean guy, it''s just he thinks the money can go to other things so I cannot waste a few hundred resetting everything, you know? Gotta make it a SMOOTH transaction.)

 

[elle_chris]

Since you don''t care that your e-ring will be smaller than your pendant, but you are questioning how you''d feel about switching it our for a pendant, I think you answered your own question

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 1/13/2010 12:30:29 PM
Author: elle_chris
Since you don''t care that your e-ring will be smaller than your pendant, but you are questioning how you''d feel about switching it our for a pendant, I think you answered your own question

I''m just wondering if once I do see the larger diamond, that I''ll change my mind. lol Eh, okay. . .maybe I should go look at some diamonds of that approx. size. I did look at ones around .80 and that size looks good on my 4.5-4.75 finger. That''d be the largest I''d go, however, that is out of my price range.

That is why it''d be nice to read if others have regretting resetting original stones. I mentioned my two options to my DH and I''m pretty sure he zoned out and didn''t hear a word I said. I wonder what he was actually thinking about. lol

 

[Liane]

Since you''re fine with your current stone and sentimental, I would say that you should keep your current engagement ring and use the new stone as a pendant.

But this is a tricky one and you know your own mind best, so... I''m not sure.

I''m thinking of resetting my original engagement ring as well, but I''m wearing it today and every time I look at it, it''s just so... comfortable, you know? It feels right how it is. I''m not sure I want to change that. So maybe it''s best to keep things the way they are when they already feel "right."

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 1/13/2010 12:41:54 PM
Author: Liane
Since you''re fine with your current stone and sentimental, I would say that you should keep your current engagement ring and use the new stone as a pendant.

But this is a tricky one and you know your own mind best, so... I''m not sure.

I''m thinking of resetting my original engagement ring as well, but I''m wearing it today and every time I look at it, it''s just so... comfortable, you know? It feels right how it is. I''m not sure I want to change that. So maybe it''s best to keep things the way they are when they already feel ''right.''

Okay, thanks. What is the difference color/clarity/size between your original and your current eng. diamond?

 

[upgrade]

Go try some rings and pendants on in that size... if it were me, I''d trade in the pendant stone, move the ering stone to the pendant and put the bigger diamond in my ering. I upgraded my ering and didn''t feel at all nostaligic for the original, but I did keep my orginal stone. I think I would miss it only if I traded in the stone. As long as I still have the diamond he proposed with, I''m happy!

Since you have some time, "decide" on each option for a month or two and see how you feel.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 1/13/2010 12:59:55 PM
Author: upgrade
Go try some rings and pendants on in that size... if it were me, I''d trade in the pendant stone, move the ering stone to the pendant and put the bigger diamond in my ering. I upgraded my ering and didn''t feel at all nostaligic for the original, but I did keep my orginal stone. I think I would miss it only if I traded in the stone. As long as I still have the diamond he proposed with, I''m happy!

Since you have some time, ''decide'' on each option for a month or two and see how you feel.

Yeah, I do need to try some on (how come I give out that advice, yet don''t follow it myself - lol) I have tried on a lot of rings ranging from .75 - 2 cts and like the .70ish size. . .however, I haven''t tried on pendants that large. Okay, guess that''s what I''ll be doing tomorrow.

 

[Liane]

Date: 1/13/2010 12:45:36 PM
Author: MC
Okay, thanks. What is the difference color/clarity/size between your original and your current eng. diamond?

Oh, mine''s a total tangled-up mess.

Original engagement ring is an I SI1 1.25 carat OEC, bezel-set in a platinum solitaire. I''m thinking of resetting it in a three-stone design flanked by pear-shaped emeralds. But it''s really comfortable how it is now, looks nice on my hand, and is suitable for situations where a bigger diamond might be awkward. Also I like being able to drop it in the ultrasonic, which won''t be possible if it has emeralds.

Nerd Ring (which I wear on my left hand and which looks like an engagement ring, although it really isn''t) is the one in my avatar: "J" (really K/L) SI2 2.01 carat RB in 18K unplated WG. I love the ring but go back and forth on whether I love the diamond; on most days I do, but sometimes I wish I''d gotten another OEC, and it''s possible that someday in the future I might try to swap it out (which''ll be a whole new headache since bezels and resets are not a happy couple).

Basically I am a poster child for PS indecision and not much else.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 1/13/2010 1:25:21 PM
Author: Liane

Basically I am a poster child for PS indecision and not much else.

It''s really hard when seeing so many options. It''s even worse when a person has a limited amount of funds or has to stay within a certain budget (like me. . .

) lol

I love your ring in your avatar!

 

[Liane]

Thanks, that''s very kind of you.

PS is great for inspiration and I love its community, but I totally know what you mean about being overwhelmed with options. If only I had infinity money and infinity fingers... aaah, well.

I''m sure whatever you decide will be lovely. And I think upgrade gave better advice than I did (especially re: trying on the sizes and hanging onto the original diamond, wherever you decide to wear it).

 

[steph72276]

If it were me, I would switch the ering to the pendant and then make the bigger stone your ring. I say this b/c I got a pendant that was about 1ct and felt it was too big for me to wear on a daily basis, but I have a .45 pendant that I LOVE and would wear anytime. I agree about going out shopping and trying things on.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 1/13/2010 1:41:23 PM
Author: steph72276
If it were me, I would switch the ering to the pendant and then make the bigger stone your ring. I say this b/c I got a pendant that was about 1ct and felt it was too big for me to wear on a daily basis, but I have a .45 pendant that I LOVE and would wear anytime. I agree about going out shopping and trying things on.

.45 is actually a great size for a pendant. Unfortunely I wasn''t as awed by the stone I got as I had hoped to be. The E has ended up being too icy for me and I''m kind of self conscious that it looks like a CZ! An H seems like it''d be better. My eng. stone is a G, so it''s close enough to that color so at least I don''t have to worry about that angle of this decision.

Finally I have a decision to make, though. . .it''s been a few years!

 

[LGK]

If it were *me*, the bigger stone would go into the e-ring. But, I am definitely a size girl

(and not sentimental about jewelry) and it's a pretty personal decision yanno?

I think swapping the stones around again if you have to shouldn't be *that* expensive. The bench guy I go to, Larry Winters, is fabulous and very reasonable, and he tends to charge in the $20 range to set simple stuff, if I recall. I do understand the "don't annoy the husband about jewelry indecisiveness" though!

Still, if there's any way you can take the pressure off yourself about having to make an irrevocable decision it makes it a lot easier... it's so easy to drive yourself nuts with those, especially about jewelry

How cool you get to upgrade though! Have fun with it

 

[swingirl]

I put my original ering in a pendant when I upgraded my wedding set. I love wearing it around my neck. I wear it more often than my ering and like it closer to my heart.

I took replaced my original ering because it was damaged and although I have kept it in my jewelry box I realize I am more sentimental towards the stone than the bent yellow-gold setting.

My first stone was poorly cut and I found this out shortly after I bought it. Once I found PS and realized it could be recut I did just that. It lost a tiny bit of weight (had a humongous girdle) and is not H&A as the cutter was only able to get 7 good arrows. But it is so much nicer and I love it even more.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

Date: 1/13/2010 1:40:31 PM
Author: Liane
Thanks, that''s very kind of you.

PS is great for inspiration and I love its community, but I totally know what you mean about being overwhelmed with options. If only I had infinity money and infinity fingers... aaah, well.

I''m sure whatever you decide will be lovely. And I think upgrade gave better advice than I did (especially re: trying on the sizes and hanging onto the original diamond, wherever you decide to wear it).

my thoughts exactly

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 1/13/2010 2:37:40 PM
Author: LittleGreyKitten
If it were *me*, the bigger stone would go into the e-ring. But, I am definitely a size girl

(and not sentimental about jewelry) and it''s a pretty personal decision yanno?

I think swapping the stones around again if you have to shouldn''t be *that* expensive. The bench guy I go to, Larry Winters, is fabulous and very reasonable, and he tends to charge in the $20 range to set simple stuff

Okay, well I just went into the most prostigeous of jewelery stores - Fred Meyer. You know. . .why buy from WF when I can buy from FM? hahaha

I picked up some groceries and then snuck into their jewelry dept. and peeked at a few pre-set rings that were labeled as "3/4." I''m just wearing my wedding band so I didn''t compare sizes. Upon looking though, I am tempted to upgrade my eng. stone and may do so. There is about a 99.9% likelihood this will be my only chance and seeing the larger size kind of left me with major desire. . .hahaha

Where is Larry Winters located? I did a quick google and nothing popped up.

 

[lyra]

I would definitely do the engagement ring upgrade. You only see a pendant in the mirror, generally. You see your engagement ring constantly. It''s not a *huge* size difference, but enough to notice.

My original ring had a .26 ct diamond, H, VVS1 (overkill clarity). My upgrade was 1.77 ct K VS1. Obviously I could afford to keep the original ER, lol. I''m not as thrilled 2 years later because I don''t find that I wear my new ER set very often at all. I *think* I''m going to go to a big 5 stone, but I already have a small 5 stone, so I don''t know! It''s crazy.

 

[AprilBaby]

Ditto Swingirl. I put my original .38 in a halo pendant which I never take off and wear near my heart. I got a new 1.21 and put it in a 3 stone anniversary ring.

 

[LilyKat]

Personally, I would put the "preferred" stone (whichever that is) in the ring, as that''s what YOU will be seeing constantly. If it were me, I''d rather look at the bigger diamond

Especially as it will be the new one, and you''ll probably want to gaze at it constantly. But then, I''m not very sentimental about these things.

 

[Bliss]

Wow, what a great upgrade!

Because your DH isn''t sentimental about changing the e-ring, I would put the larger stone into a ring.

My reasons are:
1. In a ring, YOU will get to enjoy it more bc you can SEE it more often as opposed to around your neck.
2. This is your *one* shot to upgrade your ring and I don''t think you''ll regret it.
3. You are keeping both your e-ring setting plus e-stone so you aren''t losing anything, though they''ll be in different pieces.
4. The ring is more symbolic of how hard you two have worked together to be in the situation you are now to upgrade. You should wear it with pride and celebrate this upgrade in a symbolic way.
5. I like the number 5 so I''m inventing a fifth reason... bc I said so!

Haha. OK, here''s a good reason. You like smaller pieces, MC. So if you''re going to let one piece be "big," then let it be your most important piece - your e-ring.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 1/13/2010 6:28:47 PM
Author: Bliss
Wow, what a great upgrade!

Because your DH isn''t sentimental about changing the e-ring, I would put the larger stone into a ring.

My reasons are:
1. In a ring, YOU will get to enjoy it more bc you can SEE it more often as opposed to around your neck.
2. This is your *one* shot to upgrade your ring and I don''t think you''ll regret it.
3. You are keeping both your e-ring setting plus e-stone so you aren''t losing anything, though they''ll be in different pieces.
4. The ring is more symbolic of how hard you two have worked together to be in the situation you are now to upgrade. You should wear it with pride and celebrate this upgrade in a symbolic way.
5. I like the number 5 so I''m inventing a fifth reason... bc I said so!

Haha. OK, here''s a good reason. You like smaller pieces, MC. So if you''re going to let one piece be ''big,'' then let it be your most important piece - your e-ring.

Nice itemized list, Bliss. lol Thanks!!!

I was just looking at the settings on the WF site. I wish I could get something fancy but because my wedding band is a thick Art Carved band and I do not want to replace it, if I do upgrade my eng. diamond, I''m going to get the simple four-prong ring that''s only $295 to keep the general look the same. I would keep my current setting except it''s been resized a few times and the last jeweler thinned out the bottom too much. The only part I really care about is the diamond.

Anyway, I never expected to be looking at a larger diamond. If I didn''t have my pendant to trade in, there is no way I''d even be in this position. Yaaah. Just a few months to wait.

 

[Bliss]

I''m excited for you, MC!

It is your "forever" stone! Maybe you could put another stone into your original e-ring setting? It could be a pretty RHR.

I think the simple 4 prong setting will showcase your new big stone beautifully! It will pop!

Wow, I''m so excited for you! It''s going to seem huge when you get it.

 

[steph72276]

Bliss, I need to call on you whenever I need to convince my hubby of anything...I like your logic

 

[Bliss]

Date: 1/13/2010 8:10:09 PM
Author: steph72276
Bliss, I need to call on you whenever I need to convince my hubby of anything...I like your logic

Steph!!! Hahahaha! Thanks! I wish I could be logical and convincing for all things! However, I can always find 100 reasons to justify a sparkly...or an extra cookie!

 

[Bella_mezzo]

So exciting MC! If you do the e-ring there are several other beautiful simple solitaire settings (like Brian Gavin''s

) which are inexpensive and have nice lines, just in case you aren''t digging the simple 4 prong.

 

[Dreamer_D]

I would put the larger diamond into the ring. I suggest this because one of the nice things about larger diamonds is that you can see the facet patterns better than with smaller diamonds, there is more surface area for scintillation and contrast and all those lovely things that make diamonds so gorgeous. Wearing it on a ring will allow you to enjoy that beauty whenever you want. A pendant is for other people to enjoy, but the e-ring is for yourself.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 1/13/2010 8:05:34 PM
Author: Bliss
I'm excited for you, MC!

It is your 'forever' stone! Maybe you could put another stone into your original e-ring setting? It could be a pretty RHR.

I think the simple 4 prong setting will showcase your new big stone beautifully! It will pop!

Wow, I'm so excited for you! It's going to seem huge when you get it.

I do have some loose garnets that about the same size as my .42. They only deal is they're not of the highest quality. hmm. . .still better than letting the setting sit around.

 

[swingirl]

Date: 1/13/2010 3:54:55 PM
Author: SanDiegoLady

Date: 1/13/2010 3:11:00 PM
Author: swingirl
I put my original ering in a pendant when I upgraded my wedding set. I love wearing it around my neck. I wear it more often than my ering and like it closer to my heart.

I took replaced my original ering because it was damaged and although I have kept it in my jewelry box I realize I am more sentimental towards the stone than the bent yellow-gold setting.

My first stone was poorly cut and I found this out shortly after I bought it. Once I found PS and realized it could be recut I did just that. It lost a tiny bit of weight (had a humongous girdle) and is not H&A as the cutter was only able to get 7 good arrows. But it is so much nicer and I love it even more.

How much does something like that run? The re-cutting? I might just be able to do that with my diamond as well when it comes time to replace it.. it might have to be cut a lot.. but.. it would still be my diamond, and that would mean so much!

The recut cost about $300. It's only a 0.5ct stone that got knocked down to about 0.4ct (but faces up the same). It was worth it for me even though I could have put the money towards a new ACA. But I like my 25 year old original.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 1/13/2010 9:11:08 PM
Author: Bella_mezzo
So exciting MC! If you do the e-ring there are several other beautiful simple solitaire settings (like Brian Gavin''s

) which are inexpensive and have nice lines, just in case you aren''t digging the simple 4 prong.

Thanks for the recommendation. Because the stone is in my pendant, I''ll be working with WF again. Hopefully they can help reset my eng. stone if I go that route.

On a side note: Again, yesterday, I brought up my two options to my husband and he said he didn''t want to talk about it and *immediately* changed the subject to his boat! ugh. No surprise there. Basically, I''m imagining his thinking was, "you figure out your diamonds on your own because I have my own stuff to play with and diamonds are boring to me." lol Guess that means there is no guilt if I do rearrange everything.

 

[LGK]

Date: 1/13/2010 4:59:40 PM
Author: MC

Date: 1/13/2010 2:37:40 PM
Author: LittleGreyKitten
If it were *me*, the bigger stone would go into the e-ring. But, I am definitely a size girl

(and not sentimental about jewelry) and it''s a pretty personal decision yanno?

I think swapping the stones around again if you have to shouldn''t be *that* expensive. The bench guy I go to, Larry Winters, is fabulous and very reasonable, and he tends to charge in the $20 range to set simple stuff

Okay, well I just went into the most prostigeous of jewelery stores - Fred Meyer. You know. . .why buy from WF when I can buy from FM? hahaha

I picked up some groceries and then snuck into their jewelry dept. and peeked at a few pre-set rings that were labeled as ''3/4.'' I''m just wearing my wedding band so I didn''t compare sizes. Upon looking though, I am tempted to upgrade my eng. stone and may do so. There is about a 99.9% likelihood this will be my only chance and seeing the larger size kind of left me with major desire. . .hahaha

Where is Larry Winters located? I did a quick google and nothing popped up.

Larry''s just a bench, no retail store- basically you just call him and make an appt- he''s located along Lake City Way, in the Seattle zip code part of it. He does most of the work for several of the antique jewelry dealers who sell out of the antique mall I work at, which is how I met him, and I''ve been taking my jewelry to him for 10 years. His workshop is something to behold- about the size of a walk in closet with tools on every surface- you perch on the toolbox and he often will size while you wait etc. (It''s a silly sounding setup but his workmanship is amazing; he did that crazy bezel-rebuild and repair on my antique e-ring setting.)

Hrm. I know I can''t post his phone # here. If you want his #, call or email me at work and me (or anyone else who answers the phone actually) can pass his info on. Just google "antique mall" and we''re the um... fourth result.

How hilarious that DH is all about the boat rather than the jewelry. Well, now he can''t gripe if you do what you want!