TRAVEL TIME TO THE WEDDING what is exceptable to you?

[Girls-best-friend]

How much time would you be willing to spend in travel time to go to someones wedding/reception?

1 hour, 2 hours, 3 hours, 4 hours, 5 or more hours.

Just trying to figure out what the average time is amongst most people.

I have a place that I might use but the drive might be too long.


Also would this be a factor in deciding whether or not you attend?

Thanks

 

[goldenringlets]

Good question - I wondered the same, 'though we're in a different league.

We're planning our wedding, and half the guests will have to fly, not drive, 12 hours, then drive another 2...

You needn't decide how far they'll drive, invite them and see...

Or, are you still trying to figure out the venue? We are - we haven't even narrowed it down to a continent!

 

[Girls-best-friend]

Trying to choose a place. I think it would help if I knew how many people might turn it down because of the distance they would have to travel.

I asked this on another board and have been getting answers like depends on how well I know them. Good answer but not very helpful LOL. Kinda need specifics, so let me add something to the question.


How much time would you give for a coworker, friend, bestfriend, family? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 or more hours.

Thanks

 

[pauls girl]

I think that people are more willing to travel for a wedding than a lot of people give them credit for. I worried about the same thing when deciding where to have ours, and a good friend of mine reminded me "if you invite them, they will come" We aren't inviting co-workers, but I think that a lot of times if a wedding is a bit of a drive or a flight away, people tend to make a mini-vacation out of it. I know that we have flown to Hawaii for a wedding, driven 6 hours for one & 4 for another, and endless flights to other near states. Each time, we just considered it a chance to get away. Naturally, there will always be some people who can't make it to these destination weddings due to cost, etc. But I really think that the majority are willing to travel. A friend of mine went to Italy for a wedding she was invited to, and she didn't even know the bride that well! It was just an excuse to go to Italy. Sounds like a good excuse to me! It is your wedding...have it where you want it.

We are sending out save the date cards though, so that those who are coming from out of town can start to plan for that, and also save up if they need to for hotels or plane tickets.

 

[Mara]

It depends on who they are....best friends or casual acquaintances

Driving I would go maybe MAX 2 hours. Because otherwise its no fun anymore. You get all dressed up and go out and if the drive is 2 hours each way that's 4 hours total just in driving time. Not to mention having to limit your drink at dinner etc etc because the drive is so long on the way home, not leaving too late to return home, etc. You'd have to make sure your wedding/reception was over by a decent hour to allow people to drive home and/or setup hotel rooms nearby for those who didn't want to make the trip.




I was in a wedding where it was about an hour away driving so we just stayed at a hotel nearby...forget driving back all late at night. Many more people would probably prefer this, something to keep in mind.




For real traveling, e.g. flying...our wedding is around 5 hours for anyone from CA and 9 hours for the East Coasters..YIKES. That's some committment.

But it's a destination and we knew we'd lose about 1/2 the guests when we did it this way. As long as they still send gifts, that's okay!

 

[jenibear]

I would travel anywhere, anytime to go to a wedding. I've gone out of state and several hours of driving in state. I've never been to a wedding that is closer than 1 1/2 hours. If it's more than two hours away I'll stay overnight - and I never expect the people getting married to provide me with anything.
To me, a wedding is a once in a lifetime occassion that I would want to share with the people inviting me.

 

[canadiangrrl]

85% of our invited guests will have a drive of six hours or more to attend our wedding. Or maybe they'll fly.

We are getting married in Maryland, and we have family and friends coming from Toronto, Ottawa, Montreal, Vancouver (!!), Tennessee, Alabama, New York, Virginia, Rhode Island, South Carolina, North Carolina, Florida....the list goes on.

We are getting married in my fiance's hometown, so it's easy for his immediate family. Other than that, everyone else has to travel if they want to come. There was no easy way for us to do this - we can't get married here in Toronto for reasons having to do with the immigration process, so we chose to get married in his hometown because A) it's less than an hour's drive from BWI B) it's cheaper than the DC area in which we live and C) it's only an hour or so away from our home.

We also chose a mutual (Canadian & American) long weekend (Labour Day weekend, September 4th.) This was so that people would have an extra day to travel, if necessary. The only other shared long weekend is Columbus Day/Canadian Thanksgiving, in October, and I didn't want my Canadian friends & family to have to travel over the holiday weekend. In short, there was really no easy way to handle the travel situation. Other than elope. Which we've considered.

 

[sfbayarea]

i feel as long as you're under 10 hours, you're fine. if someone says that they don't want to go to your wedding simply because of the travel TIME, its more likely an excuse for not going rather than a real reason. of course, things are a little different if you need to factor in things like MONEY for airline tickets or accomodations. but if it's just driving time we're talking about, i think that most people that wanted to attend would have no problems with driving and paying for gas. in a way, its a good way to weed out who REALLY wants to attend.

 

[Mara]

Yes and even if they don't come, invite them and they are supposed to send gifts!!

Hee Hee...then they will figure they might as well come because they are giving you a gift anyway. Hahaaa.

 

[sxn675]

----------------
On 12/19/2003 2:31:31 AM Mara wrote:


Yes and even if they don't come, invite them and they are supposed to send gifts!!

Hee Hee...then they will figure they might as well come because they are giving you a gift anyway. Hahaaa.
----------------

Actually, guests do not have to send a gift for being invited (that is a common misconception). As for the original question, if it's a wedding where I'm going and coming back the same day, I'd say two hours. If you're going to have a wedding where a lot of people are driving 1-2 hours, then it's a good idea to have the ceremony and reception relatively close together in time so that people aren't hanging around in between with nothing to do. If you want to take pictures in between, then perhaps have a cocktail hour at the reception location so that your guests can go there right after the ceremony. Good luck with your planning!

 

[Mara]

They're technically not required, but they SHOULD. Of course not everyone knows the drill....but most do.

 

[sxn675]

----------------
On 12/19/2003 12:30:17 PM Mara wrote:


They're technically not required, but they SHOULD. Of course not everyone knows the drill....but most do.

----------------

Why should they? Many times, people opt to send a gift because they are friends with the couple and want to wish them well. But, there's no reason that they should feel compelled to do so. Of course, people love to receive gifts so it's nice when that does occur....

 

[Mara]

If I get an invite to a wedding, I send a gift..it's a no brainer in my circle. They cared enough to invite you, care enough to give some love back.

I love gifts, I love to give them and love to get them. Pretty much everyone in my circle knows of my love for gifts, we invited more people than we know will come especially so we could get more gifts!

Now it's up to my lovely bridesmaids to drop the word everywhere on where we are registered, multiple times.

We even had an engagement party where...you guessed it...we got gifts!!

 

[Girls-best-friend]

Thanks everyone. The place is a three hour drive. So that would be six hours total travel time. I may just decide to start it a littel earlier this way it won't be over too late. That might help.

If its over at midnight people may not want to get home at 3am. Hmmm. Maybe I'll keep looking. Its not like I am overwhelmed by this place anyway.

Thanks

 

[jenibear]

I'll start by saying this is just my opionion, but if people don't want to drive home at midnight they can get a hotel room nearby. That's what I do. Your planning the wedding and they are guests. Figuring out how to get there and whether to stay in a hotel is a guests problem. I never expected people to cater to me when I've gone to weddings. It's not my day, it's theirs.
You do what you want - if people can't come or have to leave early that's their problem.
That's just my opinion and how I deal with things when I am a GUEST at a wedding. I think far too many guests expect special treatment. It shouldn't be that big of a deal - and if it is they don't have to go!

 

[Mara]

Yeah if it's 3 hours each way, I would estimate most people would definitely get a hotel room.




However, if you aren't feeling the love for the place...then don't committ yet.




We saw a bunch of places and while some were really nice, nothing jumped out at us as being the right thing. Plus of course everything was super expensive and we didn't even love it.




So when the Hawaii thing came around, we weren't mentally committed and doing something like that sounded way more up our alley. Keep looking until you really know what you want.

 

[Girls-best-friend]

I think I will keep looking. I think I will make the limit a 2hour drive.