Tips For Your Wedding Day

[rosetta]

Married ladies, do you have any tips for us soon to be brides?

Any last minute advice?

My own tips from friends:

1. Sleep early or prepare for bags under the eyes the next day. I'm going to need a sleeping pill to do this.

2. Take time to sit quietly with your new husband for a few minutes to take it all in

3. Keep a simple first aid kit with a few over the counter meds like paracetamol (acetaminophen to you US folk), anithistamines and ibuprofen, bandaids etc. And safety pins!

Ok, that's all I got.

Would love to hear your advice about making the most of the day

 

[sillyberry]

Hmmm...

1. Roll with the punches. I'm pretty sure even at the best, most meticulously planned weddings, something doesn't turn out how envisioned. For us mere mortals, that may be a few somethings! Don't get wrapped up in how the cake table looks or whether the lighting plan was all wrong. It will all be okay. If something needs to be handled with a vendor, it can happen AFTER the wedding!

2. LOOK at the venue. I found that everything was a blur and in retrospect, I wish I had stopped to really look at all the decor that I had spent so much time worrying about!

3. Do what stresses you out the least. If you want to get ready with all 16 of your bridesmaids, do. If just your MOH, do. If no one but you and the hairstylist, do. Don't feel constrained by thinking you have to accommodate everyone else.

4. Do First Look pictures. Okay, okay, I know this is always controversial and probably wrong for this list. But I cannot imagine my wedding day if we had not done pictures before the ceremony. We did just a few after (family and a few more with DH around the property) and I felt like I missed out on cocktail hour. I definitely missed out on the little pears with blue cheese and pulled sugar and bacon! And walking down the aisle was still absolutely freaking amazing.

5. Remember why you're there. Sure you're throwing a big party, but really? You're getting MARRIED. When you get lost in everything else, you can forget the reason you've been focused on favors and first dance songs for so long. So take a break, look down at your left-hand, and smile.

 

[yssie]

Definitely ditto on the rolling with it! The morning of I was staying at home for custom, all the guests showered first, and there was no hot water. I wonder how many brides-to-be in the US in 2010 took bucket baths? Fortunately I was too nervous to actually pitch the hissy fit that was simmering... Or just never, in all the fuss, got around to putting on new nailpolish? (DH's mother dragged him in for a mani/pedi and his nails were lovely and sparkly, my 2week old clear was cracking on my fingertips and my toenails were stained red from marthani, it was pretty funny )


Honestly... I don't remember much about the actual wedding, or reception. Fragmented bits and pieces but it's mostly all a blur! What I do remember of the "event" - one of my most precious memories, actually - is the lunch we had at the local mall the day afterward. Not fancy at all, just the two of us, definition of newlywed, having the usual conversations and surrounded by the usual mass of people - and yet everything was different, we were different, and it was so nice to just - relax and absorb it. To see how different "ordinary" could be. So that's my advice: plan a couple of hours to do something ordinary the day afterward with your new spouse


ETA: oh, and Visine. Even if you're sure you're not going to cry.

 

[rubybeth]

1. Needle and thread in your dress color/his tux color. Stuff happens.

2. If you don't already, appoint someone your 'runner' because once you're in your dress and all your finery, running back and forth just isn't fun.

3. Stay hydrated and don't get drunk.

4. EAT!

5. Candid photos. Bridesmaids/MOH can do this, as well as others, but just candid shots of the day are nice to have especially since official photos take a while to be ready. We set up a photo site account for family/friends to upload all their photos of the day, and it was nice to see hundreds of photos within a week.

 

[rosetta]

Thanks so much ladies, these are great

 

[Gypsy]

Something will go wrong. It could be as small as the wrong cake stand being used or as big as your zipper on your wedding dress breaking in the middle of your reception (both happened at our wedding). It's your wedding and there are no do overs. Once you wake up that morning tell yourself you are going to have the best day of your life and mean it. And don't let anything get you down.

My wedding day was just fabulous. Was it perfect? No. And that was fine. Life isn't perfect either. But it is still sweet. As long as you let yourself enjoy it for what it is.

 

[Mayk]

1. If they are doing everyone's hair.. do yours first.. not last... it gives you time to study it and make changes while everyone else is getting done.. same thing with make up... I went last and there wasn't a lot of time for change.

2. Eat... is a good one... I didn't and never did at the reception... my stomach was too nervous but everyone talked about how fabulous the food was.. I didn't try any of it.. except a little salad...

3. Make a list of things to pack and take with you.. the day before the wedding I let it get the best of me.. I couldn't think of what to take with me.. ugh.. my wedding coordinator had to do a mental list with me.. I had been so organized and I just crumbled... my mind became a clean slate... of nothingness.

4. Breathe....enjoy... and by all means slow down and take it all in.. it's hard to do... but great advice from this thread.. from more than me...

 

[hoofbeats95]

I just got married in April, so this is all fresh in my mind.

I don't know what kind of wedding you are having. But definitely roll with the flow. Enjoy the morning cause once everything starts it's over so fast!

EAT! I was starving by the time we got to the reception and I did manage a small lunch. Right before we walked into the reception was my one bitchy bride moment. "EVERYONE!!!! Shut up, get in line, we gotta get in there - I'm starving!" lol.

Enjoy time with your husband at the reception. For me it's traditional to walk around to all the guests and say hi. We had about 300-350 guests. It took time. I didn't get to dance as much as I wanted. With and without my husband! I just wished for a few more dances. That's such nice alone time.

Enjoy every moment. Smile a lot! Don't hunch your shoulders in photos. ha ha. Have fun!

 

[tammy77]

You guys are making me cry!! I'm so excited, and this is all such wonderful, sweet advice. Thank you!!!

 

[Bleed Burnt Orange]

Definitely ditto on the rolling with it! The morning of I was staying at home for custom, all the guests showered first, and there was no hot water. I wonder how many brides-to-be in the US in 2010 took bucket baths? Fortunately I was too nervous to actually pitch the hissy fit that was simmering... Or just never, in all the fuss, got around to putting on new nailpolish? (DH's mother dragged him in for a mani/pedi and his nails were lovely and sparkly, my 2week old clear was cracking on my fingertips and my toenails were stained red from marthani, it was pretty funny )


Honestly... I don't remember much about the actual wedding, or reception. Fragmented bits and pieces but it's mostly all a blur! What I do remember of the "event" - one of my most precious memories, actually - is the lunch we had at the local mall the day afterward. Not fancy at all, just the two of us, definition of newlywed, having the usual conversations and surrounded by the usual mass of people - and yet everything was different, we were different, and it was so nice to just - relax and absorb it. To see how different "ordinary" could be. So that's my advice: plan a couple of hours to do something ordinary the day afterward with your new spouse


ETA: oh, and Visine. Even if you're sure you're not going to cry.

Yssie...you make me want to be married to enjoy a moment like this! Such a sweet sentiment.

ETA: Thanks for all of the advice ladies!

 

[KittyGolightly]

I just got married on Saturday, so while these things are fresh in my mind, here's my Top 10 list.

1. Stand up straight.

2. Smile real smiles for the photographer. This will be more difficult than you think after taking non-stop photos for hours on end. Think of a joke if you have to.

3. Give your most trustworthy BM a list of names and phone numbers of any vendors you think you might have to contact during the day. Give your vendors that person's phone number in case of an emergency.

4. Be realistic about your wedding-day timeline. Build in time for delays and/or emergencies. Getting into your dress will take longer than you think, especially if you have buttons or a corset back. Print out your timeline and have it somewhere visible while you're getting ready.

5. If you're taking group photos after the ceremony, designate a loud and authoritative family member to help the photographer round people up.

6. Do not try any new beauty products in the 5 days before your wedding. I have no idea what possessed me, but last Wednesday, I decided to experiment with self-tanner. My skin was a splotchy mess the next day. I was able to even it out with another application, but save yourself the heart attack. Nothing new during wedding week.

7. Hydrate well the day before and the morning of the wedding. Limit liquids about 2 hours before you have to change into your dress. The dress will be hotter than you expect. Ask a trustworthy friend (not a BM - their hands will be full) to bring a bottle of water for you to start drinking after the ceremony, especially if you will be standing around outside taking endless photos.

8. Don't lock your knees during the ceremony.

9. Put together an emergency kit or buy one of those pre-assembled Brides Made kits. Make sure you have fashion tape. If your dress has lots of buttons on the back, make sure you pack a crochet hook. Leave the hook in your hotel room so that your new husband can help you out of your dress in the evening.

10. Enjoy your day. No matter what goes wrong, focus on the fact that you are marrying the love of your life.

 

[zoebartlett]

Yssie -- I thought I was the only one who couldn't really remember much about the reception. I remember hearing so much advice here before my wedding from people who said to step back and take it all in. Apparently, I interpreted that to mean, 'memorize every detail.' I was so focused on trying to remember everything that the exact opposite happened. If that makes any sense.

So my advice would be to just enjoy it. If you try too hard to remember every single detail, you may end up with a slight case of amnesia.

 

[JacquiT]

Great advice! One thing that I did on my wedding day was I snuck into the reception room while everyone else was having cocktail hour. It gave me a chance to look around and see everything when it was empty and take in the big day!

Also, my husband and I took a little detour between the ceremony and cocktail hour and had a glass of champagne together as our limo driver drove us around Boston.

Best wishes!

 

[bee*]

I just think the most important tip is to enjoy it. Many of my friends were very stressed at their weddings and didn't really enjoy the day. I just loved it all and remember so many details of the day.

Definitely eat on the day. Have a good breakfast and enjoy the dinner that you've put so much work into planning. That was one of the favourite dinners that I've ever had.

Give yourself some time to get ready in the morning. I hate being late to anything but on my wedding day I was 30 minutes late to the church. It just took that long for me to be buttoned up and for the girls to get ready.

Don't get drunk like I did the night before your wedding I was having such a good time as 50 of of family and friends came down the night before with us and I drank a little bit too much and stayed up until after 3am. Luckily I was fine when I woke up at 8am the morning of my wedding.

 

[asymons412]

I'm obviously not married, yet, but... as a pharmacologist

If you do pack paracetamol/acetaminophen in your bag, don't drink after taking it! Bring along ibuprofen or naproxen instead. Acetaminophen + alcohol = liver toxicity!

Oh, and keep smiling!

 

[asymons412]

Life isn't perfect either. But it is still sweet.

This made me smile.

 

[rosetta]

I'm obviously not married, yet, but... as a pharmacologist

If you do pack paracetamol/acetaminophen in your bag, don't drink after taking it! Bring along ibuprofen or naproxen instead. Acetaminophen + alcohol = liver toxicity!

Oh, and keep smiling!

LOL! I don't drink so I didn't even consider this!

 

[rubybeth]

Also, my husband and I took a little detour between the ceremony and cocktail hour and had a glass of champagne together as our limo driver drove us around Boston.

Oh, that reminds me: our 'driver' (friend who works at VW dealership and borrowed a Phaeton for us) brought us through the Starbucks drive-through before our reception. It was pretty funny going through a drive-through in all our wedding gear. Doing something kind of silly on our wedding day was nice, broke some of the tension, etc.

 

[FrekeChild]

This isn't really a wedding day tip, but just a wedding "general" tip.

Don't worry about pleasing everyone. It's not going to happen anyway, so just let it go. And don't worry about expectations of your guests. We has 20 guests, we took them out to dinner at a really awesome restaurant, had some really delicious food, and then went to see Blue Man Group with people that wanted to go too. No fancy table settings or any decor, no dances, no traditional bouquet tosses...but we rocked it. It was amazing and everyone loved it, and it was so so so US.

And I agree with Yssie. Go do something normal afterward/next day. We went back to our room, changed into PJs and then went downstairs (Mandalay Bay, Las Vegas) and had Little Debbie cakes. I'm never going to forget having those on our wedding day and how that transformed those from little chocolate cupcakes filled with cream into something special.

Oh yeah, and don't be afraid to cry. I alternated between my awful crying face to my jubilantly thrilled face for the entire ceremony and it made for some really amazing and emotional photos.

 

[Bleed Burnt Orange]

This isn't really a wedding day tip, but just a wedding "general" tip.

Don't worry about pleasing everyone. It's not going to happen anyway, so just let it go. And don't worry about expectations of your guests. We has 20 guests, we took them out to dinner at a really awesome restaurant, had some really delicious food, and then went to see Blue Man Group with people that wanted to go too. No fancy table settings or any decor, no dances, no traditional bouquet tosses...but we rocked it. It was amazing and everyone loved it, and it was so so so US.

And I agree with Yssie. Go do something normal afterward/next day. We went back to our room, changed into PJs and then went downstairs (Mandalay Bay, Las Vegas) and had Little Debbie cakes. I'm never going to forget having those on our wedding day and how that transformed those from little chocolate cupcakes filled with cream into something special.

Oh yeah, and don't be afraid to cry. I alternated between my awful crying face to my jubilantly thrilled face for the entire ceremony and it made for some really amazing and emotional photos.

Freke, from the pics I saw of your wedding, it did look ideal! I always think of yours when I think of a perfectly intimate occasion celebrating two people! Everything seemed really nice.

 

[sillyberry]

A very practical piece of advice - bring blotting papers and USE THEM! It does no good to bring blotting papers and leave them sitting in your MOH's purse all night. Take 30 seconds every hour or so to make your face less shiny. Your pictures will thank you!

 

[vc10um]

Here's my 2 cents while our wedding is still relatively fresh in my mind:

1) Set a deadline, at some point before the wedding, after which you are not going to do anything but ENJOY YOURSELF. I originally blew past my first deadline, which was before the rehearsal, because there was stuff still to be done when we left. But a quick car trip with ladyciel got that finished, and then I said good night to my then-FI and she and I got everything prepped and sorted for the wedding day. When I went to bed, the only thing I had left to do was transpose my vows from my computer to my ceremony paper, and as you saw, it made some pretty cute pics, and allowed me to center myself the morning of the wedding and focus on the important.

2) Remember that, once the day is in motion, there's really nothing you can do except go with the flow. My mother called me while we were en route to the reception to let me know there was no cake. By the time we arrived, my reception venue had already set to getting 80+ slices of chocolate tuxedo cake prepared for my guests and doctoring up a large piece of it to be our cutting cake. And I didn't freak out. Because there wasn't a THING I could do about it. (Don't worry, we're already getting our money back from the baker.) Even if our reception venue HADN'T come to our rescue, I still don't think I would've freaked out. Been sad? You bet!

3) If you want specific pictures, speak up! Your photographers will get you amazing pictures no matter what...but if you want something specific (my jumping on the bed pictures...shots of the girls looking BA in aviator shades) or you DON'T want something (like jumping pictures or super-posed bridal party pictures) they'll be accommodating!

4) Take the time to look around you. While the day is most certainly about you and your husband, remember there are many many people who love and care for your that took the time to possibly travel a long distance to spend the day with you. Recognize how much love and support there is among your guests and draw upon that after the wedding!

That's all I've got for now...but I'm sure I'll think of more!