This guy is mad at me now

[kenny]

My SO told me a coworker was getting engaged and wanted help picking a diamond.
She noticed his ACA and Octavia was a zillion times more sparkly than any other diamonds she had ever seen and wants that kind of light performance.

I sent her a long email about cut for weight vs. cut for beauty and a link to PS a week ago but I never heard back.

Now I hear her boyfriend is angry and insulted.
He says he doesn't need or want any help.

I feel bad for her.
Yeah, I guess it is possible he will stumble across PS and get a well cut rock, but I'll feel bad if she gets some lump of coal from Kay or Zales or Robber Brothers.

Seesh, have you ever heard of a guy being so sensitive?

 

[Nashville]

Making large purchases can be a very personal thing to some people. He may feel added pressure now, or insecure about what he's able to spend.

Either way it was nice of you to help. I'm sure she'll get a lovely diamond.

 

[movie zombie]

its more of a macho male thing, imo. men just don't ask for advise or directions.........

and i wonder how much input she's going to have?

if she's assertive and is part of the process she isn't going to get a lump of coal having rec'd the info you supplied.

MoZo

ps it could also be a $ thing: he can't afford octavia.

 

[Shoopy]

Kenny, this is not about you or about the quality of the diamond.

If my time on LIW plus reading the stories from there has taught me anything is that behind the majority of these kinds of argument is a very impatient LIW who is pressuring her guy to make the decisions (and proposal) quickly. I'm willing to bet that his anger isn't from being insulted that YOU sent the links over to her to help. I bet it's more out of frustration that she won't let him go through the process.

Of course this is a generalization and that may not be the case at all but I'm willing to be it is.

 

[monarch64]

Hi. I totally agree with Fiery. This guy couldn't care less about you or Octavias or ACAs, Kenny. He is reacting to a girlfriend who is consulting what are total strangers to him about something very personal and his anger is towards her and the situation, not at you, and rightly so.

 

[tyty333]

Kenny, this is not about you or about the quality of the diamond.

If my time on LIW plus reading the stories from there has taught me anything is that behind the majority of these kinds of argument is a very impatient LIW who is pressuring her guy to make the decisions (and proposal) quickly. I'm willing to bet that his anger isn't from being insulted that YOU sent the links over to her to help. I bet it's more out of frustration that she won't let him go through the process.

Of course this is a generalization and that may not be the case at all but I'm willing to be it is.

Amen Fiery and Monnie! If I was a guy having to deal with some of those situations, I'd be annoyed to. I wish there was
great chill-pill for ladies-in-waiting...I know it can be a frustrating time for everyone involved.

 

[Indylady]

I think Fiery and Monnie hit it on the nail.

 

[shihtzulover]

Kenny, this is not about you or about the quality of the diamond.

If my time on LIW plus reading the stories from there has taught me anything is that behind the majority of these kinds of argument is a very impatient LIW who is pressuring her guy to make the decisions (and proposal) quickly. I'm willing to bet that his anger isn't from being insulted that YOU sent the links over to her to help. I bet it's more out of frustration that she won't let him go through the process.

Of course this is a generalization and that may not be the case at all but I'm willing to be it is.

I definitely think that this is very true in many situations.

I also believe that it may have something to do with the 'macho' thing: some men (and probably women, too) don't want help, because they feel like they should be able to do it all on their own. I have seen it many times - even when it's obvious that they could use some help.

 

[Tuckins1]

Whatever... See what you get for trying to be helpful? I feel bad for girls that get stuck with cruddy diamonds, but some people just don't see the point in getting a "good" rock- maybe they see it as being a snob or something.

 

[kenny]

I see what you guys are saying.
I'm certainly not upset or anything.
It is none of my business and out of my hands.

I just hope this guy won't be a jerk and resist learning about cut just because she asked him to (my suggestion).

 

[movie zombie]

and it could be how she presented your info to him.........

if nothing else, this will be a learning lesson for both of them and will either validate their compatibility or invalidate it. up to them.

MoZo

 

[Amber St. Clare]

Well, another illustration of no good deed going unpunnished!

 

[GliderPoss]

Yep I agree with the others. He is probably pissed that his budget and plans went out the window when she gushingly presented him with the superior Octavia along with a not-so-subtle nudge to get on with the process. Hurt pride mostly I suspect.....

 

[doodle]

No worries, Kenny. If your knowledge falls on deaf ears, that's more fantastic stones on the market for you, right?