The Agony Of Defeat!

[TravelingGal]

I consider something like that in the realm of acceptible. It looks to be about a thousandth of a millimeter or less. A little mark like that would likely happen from wear anyways, I suspect my own half eternity has worse from two years of ownership. But here is the thing: I have never looked and do not plan to. I hope they give you a refund, because it is what you want, but my two cents: isolating that atom sized flaw as a reason to return an item is crossing into loopy-ville (technical term).

I sized the photo to real life to put this in perspective.

I am going to have to agree. Except I am thinking the ring may be even smaller than your reduction, Dreamer.

Yes, I believe it would be.

 

[Dreamer_D]

I consider something like that in the realm of acceptible. It looks to be about a thousandth of a millimeter or less. A little mark like that would likely happen from wear anyways, I suspect my own half eternity has worse from two years of ownership. But here is the thing: I have never looked and do not plan to. I hope they give you a refund, because it is what you want, but my two cents: isolating that atom sized flaw as a reason to return an item is crossing into loopy-ville (technical term).

I sized the photo to real life to put this in perspective.

I am going to have to agree. Except I am thinking the ring may be even smaller than your reduction, Dreamer.

Yes, I believe it would be.

I did my best! But yes, it seems it would be smaller. Really, that speck is maybe even 1/1000 of a millimeter, can we measure it? I think it easily would qualify as VS, no?

 

[marygrace]

I consider something like that in the realm of acceptible. It looks to be about a thousandth of a millimeter or less. A little mark like that would likely happen from wear anyways, I suspect my own half eternity has worse from two years of ownership. But here is the thing: I have never looked and do not plan to. I hope they give you a refund, because it is what you want, but my two cents: isolating that atom sized flaw as a reason to return an item is crossing into loopy-ville (technical term).

I sized the photo to real life to put this in perspective.

+1

This flaw is so tiny. What size is this melee?

I understand that you want museum perfect and that you probably will not receive that going custom. I do hope that you can negotiate a refund. Good luck.

 

[ame]

If its visible with the naked eye, it's not in the realm of acceptable for me. And that is the case. If it was eye clean, different story. But also not ok is that we had an agreement on what I expected and they would deliver and this doesn't meet that expectation. You can all berate what I find acceptable, and you will, but for how much I've invested in time and money and emotion, I'm not settling on it not being what was agreed on.

 

[decodelighted]

I can't believe you walked out of the store w/that hunk of junk! Why would you possibly accept delivery of it in that repulsive condition? I am sickened and will have trouble sleeping tonight just thinking of it being in your possession, tainting the inside of a perfectly decent safety deposit box like that with its horrific flaw(s)!!!

SHUDDER.

 

[ame]

*eyeroll*

I can see it without a loupe and the bottom line is that it's not what I paid for, and I'm not happy. That's the way I feel. And I am not ashamed for being displeased nor will i settle for what will niggle at me and what I made clear before the remake was agreed on as being an issue.

 

[TravelingGal]

*eyeroll*

I can see it without a loupe and the bottom line is that it's not what I paid for, and I'm not happy. That's the way I feel. And I am not ashamed for being displeased nor will i settle for what will niggle at me and what I made clear before the remake was agreed on as being an issue.

Ame, you shouldn't be ashamed, it is what it is. And I mean this sincerely - you have amazing eyes because I can barely see it in the hugely magnified 2nd pic where you circled it in red.

Meanwhile, Deco will just have to continue having nightmares....

 

[Dreamer_D]

No need for shame. I only posted because I think in the interest of the thousands of silent readers, it is worth some people providing their own perspective on this issue as well. I don't know what others' motivations were, but that was mine

You know, I see a real connection between your relationship with jewelery and some women's relationships with men -- where their desire for perfection stops them from even having a meaningful relationship and causes them to break up with many good potential partners. Many of those women fight to the death insisting that their standards are acceptable and ok. But I think anything a person does that brings them nothing but misery is a behavior that needs changing, not defending. "I am what I am I don't care what you think" starts to sound mighty hollow after round 4, 5, 6, 7.... of the same situation replaying itseld. *shrug* To each their own.

Again, Ame, no need to defend yourself. I am just talking about this issue more generally for conversation while my husband watches the Master's on PVR You are certainly not the only one to obsess over tiny details, you just post about it the most

**edited out my humour which migh be lost in "translation"

 

[Laila619]

I just don't think any pave band will meet your expectations. There are just too may ways it can be defective.

Plain band is best.

 

[Gypsy]

I just don't think any pave band will meet your expectations. There are just too may ways it can be defective.

Plain band is best.

I think no jewelry is best. She has issues with metal work too.

Ame,
Oy. I do think you made a mistake in taking it home. I would have just pulled out the loupe and and stayed there for a few hours.

See if you can get a refund. If you can great. Forget pave though, please. I know that there is no pave ring on this earth that will make you happy.

I am afraid to suggest any vendor to you, because I worry that your expectations are way to high and you will be unhappy and will post about it and people who don't know you and what your eccentricities are will assume there is some fault with the vendor. That said, have you ever looked at Memoire bands? Please, don't work with Pearlmans, I like them too much and they won't be able to satisfy you as great as they are.

http://memoire.com/index.aspx?par=diamonds whoever you work for needs to understand what your expectations about. Your current jeweler DOES NOT. If he had he would never have even let you walk out with that ring, would have rejected it for you.

Again, please don't contact Pearlmans. Bill won't even do custom engagement rings because he knows people are crazy when it comes to their expectations regarding them. So he won't be a good fit for you.

 

[Circe]

Would it make it more mind-clean for you if it were a cavity and not a chip?

 

[Jennifer W]

Not entirely over, but will be on Tuesday.

As for Chloe's chain of thought...My life in general is fine, I am generally pretty happy with everything besides my jewelry, and my jewelry issues are not a reflection on anything in my life being upsetting or me funneling any emotion from something else into jewelry. IF there were to be, it would be that until they're perfect, I cannot get over the robbery of my original set.

Yup, I can totally relate to this, having been there myself. No deep seated psychological issues affecting my whole entire being here, either. Sorry Ame, I really wish this had been perfect for you. Hugs.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Actually, Memoire is an excellent suggestion. Their metal work is die struck or something similar and pretty perfect. I have never looked at the diamonds with a 30x loupe and never will, so I can't say with certainty that they are perfect. But they are 10 pointers and I have not seen any flaws with my eyes or a 10x loupe on the rare occasion that I have ever looked at it with one.

Gypsy, the very funny thing is I just had a talk with Pearlman's on Thursday about setting a stone in a ring for me, and I commented that I wanted to be sure the prongs didn't get messed up. And I said that I guessed they knew that PS people were particular about prongs and they said...oh YES! But they said I was mild in my requests compared to some!

I think most out there in the world have never looked at their rings with a loupe, and they are probably a lot happier than those who use 30x loupes. (It is nice to have Dreamer around, who can really be our official diamond psychologist! New specialty, Dreamer!)

 

[ame]

Would it make it more mind-clean for you if it were a cavity and not a chip?

No. Makes no difference. We made it clear to them that no surface breaks, no chips, no black inclusions were what was promised to me and that is what I was willing to accept. It doesn't matter if it's tiny to the naked eye, it matters that it's there, after it was agreed upon that it wouldn't be. There are several other stones with little chips like at the edge of the table facet, and one that is what I assume is some feather looking thing, and if they hand-selected at 30 as they claim, none of those stones nor this would have made the cut. I also told them up front to use the ones in the ring already assuming they were not damaged during removal from that ring. Those were all the ones I had already been happy with prior to them ruining the metalwork.

Someone else would probably not see, care, worry about such a thing. So they can resell this to that person.

I DO agree that I shouldn't have been shown it, and I should not have left with it. I haven't worn it all weekend. I have barely looked at it. I have it in the safe, and that's where itll remain til I take it in on Tuesday.

But for as much as I invested in this I am hoping the refund is fair, because I have put a LOT into this monetarily, and I am leaving with nothing.

Beyond the refund, my plan is to do nothing more than wear my plain band for a while. IF and when I choose to get a new ring, it will NOT be custom anything, nothing "made to order". I don't thing ANYONE can do it right at this point.

 

[Enerchi]

Hi Ame
A few weeks ago you posted the tiffany channel set eternity band that you liked, albeit with the caveat you would not purchase direct from Tiffany but second hand. Would that be a decent temporary solution for now to wear for a while? It will give you some sparkle and it is premade, so you can assess closely and see if it would work for you?

Good luck!

 

[ame]

It's an option, but not for a long while. I need to not think about jewelry for a while. When this refund is handled I am probably just going to stick with my plain one for a while, and IF I wear my e-ring itll be for events. I am burned out.

 

[ruby59]

JMO, of course, but for 99% of people, they would find that wedding band perfectly acceptable. So how can one reasonably expect the jeweler to have to eat the cost of it?

Putting aside Ame's issues, for the jeweler this is a business. He delivered as promised, imo. He deserves to be paid.

 

[Ella]

Locked at the request of the OP.