Talk me out of this setting!!! AND Setting question

[1stTimeRockHunter]

I am in the market for an engagement ring for my lovely GF and mother to my daughter. She is the most outgoing person I have ever met (one of the many reasons I love her) but has little to no preference for her ring. I could buy her a $200 setting with a polished piece of glass and she would be thankful.

Most men would be free sailing, but I am having problems with figuring out a perfect setting. I have looked at many setting and like the idea of a halo and upon my research found one that I was strongly drawn too:

http://www.ritani.com/engagement-rings/three-stone-halo-diamond-band-engagement-ring-in-18kt-white-gold/4612#detailHeader

Im not sure what it is but I really like that setting. I am just unsure that I should be spending that kind of money (of a 9-12k total budget) on a setting she may not be 100% in love with

Do I get a less expensive setting and leave her open to the idea of upgrading the setting in the future? Also, what makes the setting a quality setting? How do I know the craftsmanship of the setting (looked at diamonds and settings at BN, WF, GOG, JA)

 

[Gypsy]

Does she like halos?

I know you said she'd like anything. And I'm sure you are right. But that doesn't mean she doesn't have preferences.

So please ask her, or take her shopping, or ask her mother/sister/best friend/cousin.

I wouldn't buy someone an expensive setting or a halo (even an inexpensive one) without their input.

Please make sure you ask your lady what her preferences are.

You have no idea if she even wants a round, as it stands. She might want a square, or a pear or an oval.

She will be wearing this for the rest of her life. Please make sure that it suits her tastes, not just yours.

 

[1stTimeRockHunter]

She has mentioned that she likes round diamonds and I am trying to be as subtle as possible about it, ruling out taking her shopping. On occasion I will show her rings or make a comment about a ring we see out together. Halo settings are something she mentioned she liked, as well as many other setting that didn't seem to be similar at all. After briefly looking she came to the conclusion she liked them all.

I guess to rephrase my question, is it silly to spend $3200 on a setting that she didn't necessarily pick out and love. Also what determines whether a setting is of good quality (specifically halo/pave which most settings she mentioned liking had in common)?

 

[mdmc]

If it were me I would buy her a round ( you said she likes round) and have it put in a solitaire setting. I would then tell her she gets to pick the setting. Maybe it really dosen't matter to her but then again some of us are too shy to say what we really want. It might be fun for the two of you to pick out a setting together.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I like this Ritani setting much better. WhiteFlash sells Ritani and can get the setting for you. It is $2190 in platinum which makes a lot more sense. I really do not like a halo with side stones...too much going on. I think you are safe since she likes rounds. I just wouldn't spend more than this because you need to put the rest toward the center stone.

http://www.ritani.com/engagement-rings/french-set-halo-diamond-band-engagement-ring-in-platinum/4975

or

http://www.ritani.com/engagement-rings/french-set-halo-diamond-band-engagement-ring-in-platinum/4973

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Diamond suggestions:

http://www.whiteflash.com/loose-diamonds/round-cut-loose-diamond-3195401.htm

http://www.whiteflash.com/loose-diamonds/round-cut-loose-diamond-3172009.htm

http://www.whiteflash.com/loose-diamonds/round-cut-loose-diamond-3236289.htm

 

[Gypsy]

I wouldn't do the above.

If you she has said she likes halos, and that she likes it all, the you can go with that. Good quality halos cost. So I don't think its' wrong to buy a nice quality setting like that Ritani.

However since you mentioned halos. I wanted to bring this one to your attention. You can get it in platinum (best metal for pave) http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/engagement-rings/pave-and-side-stones/the-anita-halo-platinum-5950p And it leaves you a little more money for the center stone. Plus it allows for a flush fit band.

It's high quality.
You could go for a center stone like this:
http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/diamonds/diamond-details/1.208-h-si1-round-diamond-ags-bl-104072305011

And it's one stop shopping.

 

[MJ0911]

I don't really have any advice, I'm just here to sympathise as I LOVE that setting and am planning on having something similar to fit an oval stone when I'm in the U.S. over Christmas. I wish I didn't like such an expensive setting and could put more towards the ring (we're on a smaller budget than you) but when it's love it's love!

If your girlfriend doesn't mind it may well be worth exploring less expensive settings, but at the same time I do understand you wanting to get something you will both really love.

ETA: you mentioned she's very outgoing - have you thought of maybe tailoring the ring to her lifestyle since she doesn't seem to have very strong opinions on the aesthetics? For example if she's very outdoorsy and active and wants to wear her ring every day a pave setting might not suit her as well as something sturdier? I'm generally inactive and indoorsy but am still doing my research to make sure the halo is sturdy enough to manage everyday wear etc. Just a thought!

 

[Snowdrop13]

Why not buy a beautiful stone with most of your budget and let her decide on the setting? $10,000 can get you 1ct plus depending on specs. Or put it in a simple classic setting that could be upgraded with time? She could "get used" to wearing the diamond and have a think about what she wants!

 

[Sunstorm]

I think that Gypsy again gave great advice and some others here too. If she likes halos which I too personally adore, I would get her a halo setting for sure. Do not buy a solitaire setting. If she is into halos, she may not like a simple solitaire. Micropave and halo are beautiful for someone who likes them. That said I would get her a simple halo, not a three stone and halo, many who like halos and micropave may not like a three stone setting on top and I too think it is a bit much going on. That she is outgoing does not necessarily mean to me that she will go hiking with this ring although if she does, it is a consideration. I love micropave and halo rings but if I do outdoor activities, I do not wear such jewelry for these occassions, if she does then that is a consideration though high quality setting should not really give her problems.

 

[TrakHack]

I'm a big fan of actually going ring shopping together. The proposal itself (when and how) can still be a surprise, but getting your girlfriend's input on the ring itself could make your life a lot easier. You mention you were drawn to the halo in the OP, but it sounded like she didn't really have a strong preference.

My boyfriend and I went ring shopping a few weekends ago (his suggestion, after I did a little basic diamond education). For me, the best part of the experience was actually seeing him try on a ring to determine size (things got a little real for me at that moment, I suppose), but I came out of the afternoon with clear preferences for what will work on my finger for my life. He now has a few options to choose from that I would be happy with, and a clear favorite identified.

You are a great boyfriend to be doing this research and putting so much thought into the selection. If you absolutely don't want to go ring shopping together, I would probably go the route of buying the diamond with a simple solitaire setting and then having her choose the setting she likes after that, like mdmc suggested.

 

[motownmama]

well, only you can really say what makes sense to do, HOWEVER - I think that Brian Gavin setting and stone Gypsy recommends sounds like a firecracker combination!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[HappyNewLife]

Ditto Gypsy, she knows her stuff. Also, with the pave not going all the way around the ring, you would be able to resize the ring-- something that I think is important if you're doing this as a surprise and aren't sure of her ring size. (Plus, us women gain and lose weight throughout our lives, lol).

 

[1stTimeRockHunter]

I like this Ritani setting much better. WhiteFlash sells Ritani and can get the setting for you. It is $2190 in platinum which makes a lot more sense. I really do not like a halo with side stones...too much going on. I think you are safe since she likes rounds. I just wouldn't spend more than this because you need to put the rest toward the center stone.

http://www.ritani.com/engagement-rings/french-set-halo-diamond-band-engagement-ring-in-platinum/4975

or

http://www.ritani.com/engagement-rings/french-set-halo-diamond-band-engagement-ring-in-platinum/4973

There is a lot less going on in those setting. Not sure what a "french" set is but I do like the round halo. The other looks to be squarish, that one doesn't appeal to me as much.

I wouldn't do the above.

If you she has said she likes halos, and that she likes it all, the you can go with that. Good quality halos cost. So I don't think its' wrong to buy a nice quality setting like that Ritani.

However since you mentioned halos. I wanted to bring this one to your attention. You can get it in platinum (best metal for pave) http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/engagement-rings/pave-and-side-stones/the-anita-halo-platinum-5950p And it leaves you a little more money for the center stone. Plus it allows for a flush fit band.

It's high quality.
You could go for a center stone like this:
http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/diamonds/diamond-details/1.208-h-si1-round-diamond-ags-bl-104072305011

And it's one stop shopping.

Gypsy, I can envision the setting and stone together and I imagine it would be nice. From my research, it seems as if Gavin blue diamonds are priced at a discount because of the misconception of fluorescence. While fluorescence doesn't bother me, it seems to be the same price if not a little more for those specs and size. Or am I mistaken?

I don't really have any advice, I'm just here to sympathise as I LOVE that setting and am planning on having something similar to fit an oval stone when I'm in the U.S. over Christmas. I wish I didn't like such an expensive setting and could put more towards the ring (we're on a smaller budget than you) but when it's love it's love!

If your girlfriend doesn't mind it may well be worth exploring less expensive settings, but at the same time I do understand you wanting to get something you will both really love.

ETA: you mentioned she's very outgoing - have you thought of maybe tailoring the ring to her lifestyle since she doesn't seem to have very strong opinions on the aesthetics? For example if she's very outdoorsy and active and wants to wear her ring every day a pave setting might not suit her as well as something sturdier? I'm generally inactive and indoorsy but am still doing my research to make sure the halo is sturdy enough to manage everyday wear etc. Just a thought!

Why not buy a beautiful stone with most of your budget and let her decide on the setting? $10,000 can get you 1ct plus depending on specs. Or put it in a simple classic setting that could be upgraded with time? She could "get used" to wearing the diamond and have a think about what she wants!

It is a GREAT setting isn't it? I have liked many settings (from what she has said she liked), but this one just happened to jump out at me and stick with me and I have no idea why. I know it doesn't make much sense for me to get that setting due to not knowing she doesn't LLOOVVEE it. You bring up a great point though. She isn't necessarily outdoorsy but she is a nurse. Would having a halo/pave cause her to not be able to work? Should I not expect her to wear it to work? (Might be a separate thread altogether)

I think that Gypsy again gave great advice and some others here too. If she likes halos which I too personally adore, I would get her a halo setting for sure. Do not buy a solitaire setting. If she is into halos, she may not like a simple solitaire. Micropave and halo are beautiful for someone who likes them. That said I would get her a simple halo, not a three stone and halo, many who like halos and micropave may not like a three stone setting on top and I too think it is a bit much going on. That she is outgoing does not necessarily mean to me that she will go hiking with this ring although if she does, it is a consideration. I love micropave and halo rings but if I do outdoor activities, I do not wear such jewelry for these occassions, if she does then that is a consideration though high quality setting should not really give her problems.

I am for sure going to get her a halo setting, I think you are right though (and Im slowly falling out of love with the setting), there is a ton going on for one ring with that setting.

I'm a big fan of actually going ring shopping together. The proposal itself (when and how) can still be a surprise, but getting your girlfriend's input on the ring itself could make your life a lot easier. You mention you were drawn to the halo in the OP, but it sounded like she didn't really have a strong preference.

My boyfriend and I went ring shopping a few weekends ago (his suggestion, after I did a little basic diamond education). For me, the best part of the experience was actually seeing him try on a ring to determine size (things got a little real for me at that moment, I suppose), but I came out of the afternoon with clear preferences for what will work on my finger for my life. He now has a few options to choose from that I would be happy with, and a clear favorite identified.

You are a great boyfriend to be doing this research and putting so much thought into the selection. If you absolutely don't want to go ring shopping together, I would probably go the route of buying the diamond with a simple solitaire setting and then having her choose the setting she likes after that, like mdmc suggested.

Trust me, I DEFINATELY see the benefits in shopping together for the ring, I wouldnt have as many stresses as I do now. I think she wants me to pick something which will mean more to her because I picked it, which leads to all the research. Thank you for the kind words, I am enjoying putting in the work to research rings but there is just SO MUCH to learn. I feel as if I know so much more than the average Joe ring shopping, but still know so little

well, only you can really say what makes sense to do, HOWEVER - I think that Brian Gavin setting and stone Gypsy recommends sounds like a firecracker combination!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have only explored PS for a few months now, and Gypsy seems to always be on point.

Ditto Gypsy, she knows her stuff. Also, with the pave not going all the way around the ring, you would be able to resize the ring-- something that I think is important if you're doing this as a surprise and aren't sure of her ring size. (Plus, us women gain and lose weight throughout our lives, lol).

VERY TRUE, Ill be sure to leave out the fact that she may GAIN or lose weight, might not be the best way to start the engagement!!! LOL

 

[msop04]

If she is a nurse, then her job will probably require her to put on gloves many times per day... You may want to think about that when looking at settings… Settings with prongs tend to catch on gloves and settings that are too high will make wearing gloves very uncomfortable. Then again, people wear rings like that all the time and it doesn't bother them. I would ask or find out if she likes bezel settings because it will not snag on a glove, and it would be very comfortable.

 

[Gypsy]

Gypsy, I can envision the setting and stone together and I imagine it would be nice. From my research, it seems as if Gavin blue diamonds are priced at a discount because of the misconception of fluorescence. While fluorescence doesn't bother me, it seems to be the same price if not a little more for those specs and size. Or am I mistaken?

Well. I don't know if they are discounted that heavily. The line has fluorescence and is guaranteed against negative effects. This is true. That's why they are named the Blue Line. That said, they are all AGS0, which commands a premium. And they are top of the line stones that come with buyback and upgrade policies (which adds to the bottom line). So they are still priced to reflect all of that.

Also the one I linked you to is only medium fluorescence. So... not a large discount. You are right.

But they are gorgeous stones and at H color a little bit of a boost from fluorescence while not necessary is still nice.

I was more focused on the quality and style of the setting and the size (1.2 carats) of the center stone and the ease of the one stop shopping, more than anything else.

Whether that's a good value is up to you.
BGD could (and has many times in the past) sourced GIA 3X stones with a great idealscope image. H color SI clarity and eyeclean, and that way you could go up a bit in size. Not a whole lot. But you might get to a 1.3 carat or so. Or even a 1.4. It wouldn't have an upgrade policy though. So that's something to be aware of.

That way you still get the one stop shopping and the lovely halo but eek out a little more size.

I personally have worked with BGD on 3 transactions and it's been a very easy process each time and my pieces have always appraised very well especially in terms of manufacturing and workmanship. So I feel very comfortable recommending them, because of that.