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LiW Starlight band as e-ring?

H

hajjah

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 20, 2010
Messages
1
Hi all--I'm new to pricescope so I'm not sure if this is the best forum to post this question, but here goes.

My gf has very simple tastes in jewelry--rotates just a few basic items in her necklace/earring collection, wears only one nondescript silver ring. Nothing blingy at all. So, I'm thinking about something simple and slightly nontraditional for an engagement ring, like Etienne Perret's Starlight Bands (http://www.starlightbands.com/). Like a white gold with several small diamonds (perhaps including one colored diamond for variety).

I know these kinds of rings are more typically used as wedding bands or eternity bands, but I thought this would be a nice alternative to the usual solitare, etc.

Any thoughts on the appropriateness of this choice? Anyone know somebody who has this kind of ring as an engagement ring? Thanks for your feedback....
 
Hi there! Have you ever seen her flip through a magazine and linger on a page with a jewelry ad? Seen her leer at something in the window of a jewelry shop? The engagement ring is a big deal and of course you want to get her something she'll not only love, but be comfortable in. I would suggest just going into a store and see what she likes. If you want to surprise her, you can say you're looking for a gift for your mom/sister (whoever) and just ask her her opinion while you're there and see the things she looks at. The starlight bands are not my taste and I actually think a low profile, simple solitaire is more classic than these bands. Just weighing in with my opinion and I think your best bet is to let her peak around in a jewelry store and follow her lead. Good luck!
 
I think those are pretty but definitely not a traditional engagement ring. I also do not wear a lot of jewelery-usually pearl stud earrings and maybe a necklace-but for my engagement ring I wanted...well...a ring that looked like an engagement ring! I think it is risky to get something like that UNLESS you know for sure that that is what your GF wants. Since this is such a large purchase I would advise either asking her straight out or enlisting the help of her friends/mom/sister/cousins/something to see what she likes. Good luck!
 
I agree that you should definitely try to somehow figure out what she likes and what she wants. Could you ask a friend or family member of hers? Of course, it would have to be someone who could keep a secret, but they might have an idea about what she likes.

I also agree that simple solitaires on plain bands are more classic than the type of ring that you are showing. She might love what you are looking at, but it's not very traditional, so I would be concerned that it might not be what she has in mind at all.

Good luck! :)
 
I agree with the other posters- just because she doesn't currently wear bling doesn't mean she wouldn't like to have some. I'm guessing she would like a simple solitaire, at least based on your description.

To get a better idea, can you enlist the help of one of her friends? Sisters? Mom?
 
I think it is a wonderful choice, especially if she is athletic and/or not very interested in jewelry. But I agree with the others, you want to make sure she doesn't have any desire for a "traditional" engagement ring. She also needs to be the type of woman who won't feel odd when her friends/family ask her where her "real" engagement ring is (and yes, there are bozos out there who will say things like this!).
 
I mostly lurk on PS, rarely post, but I really wanted to add my two cents to this thread.

I think you have to be really careful about associating your gf's lack of interest in jewelry to a potential lack of interest in a traditional engagement ring. As a woman who isn't much into jewelry myself, I still am really looking forward to having a traditional solitaire engagement ring. That's because I don't think of an e-ring as a piece of jewelry; I think of it as a symbol and token of love and commitment. Don't deny your gf the pleasure of being able to wear such a recognizable token until you're sure that she's truly uninterested.
 
hmmm, while I like the band, I have to agree with the majority. I have many friends who do not wear lots of big flashy jewelry- some who wear NO jewelry at all, but as any one of them, and they have a definitive idea as to what cut diamond and style setting they want.

If you think she wants to me more "low profile" maybe a diamond around .5-.75-1 ct set in a bezel style band/setting. This style lays flat, and can be simple and understated while still beautiful and traditional...

But I would not assume she doesnt want a traditional engagement ring just because she isn't into a lot of jewelry, I think 99% of ladies still want the traditional ring even if they wear no other jewelry
 
My future sister-in-law has a simple diamond eternity band as her e-ring and loves it, but she specifically asked for that instead of a traditional e-ring. I think it can be a great alternative choice, but I think it's one of those things that you should probably ask about before deciding as most people like the more traditional e-ring choice. I ditto that you should probably try to get her opinion on things.
 
Honestly those would be fine if it were a wedding band for daily wear but not for a engagement ring. The ring ismore than just jewerly, its a repensation of a lifetime promise and something she will keep forever. I know ladies who were no jewerly ut ask them about their dream engagement ring, and its usually along the lines of " a traditional solitare, maybe .5 ct". Maybe just ask her what her dream ring was as a child and maybe how its chnaged to now. You can maybe come up with something she likes at that point.
 
I agree with the other posters. My sister has some of the simplest taste of anyone that I know. She doesn't wear make-up. Always wears her hair pulled back into a pony tail. She hardly ever wears jewelry of any sort. But when it came to her engagement ring, she went with a low profile solataire bezel set on an unadorned band. There should be plenty of options like that out there, if you're interested, but here's one link to get you started. http://www.rothemcollection.com/pc/viewPrd.asp?idproduct=1710&idcategory=15#details
 
I do not really wear any jewelry and don't look like I would really want any either (pretty laissez faire, flip flops and Tshirts outside of work).... but I want a ering that looks like a ering. You better check her expectations.
 
I second everyone else. I think that the starlight band is beautiful, and that it makes for a wonderful wedding band. I also think it could make a beautiful engagement ring, for those who have minimalist styles. However, I would be absolutely certain that is what she want's, and that she does not desire a traditional engagement ring before purchasing it. Good luck to you, and let us know how it goes!
 
I 100% agree with the other ladies, but the last engagement ring I saw was made out of an old silver coin.
Contrary to popular PS belief, not everyone wants bling.
But of course, you need to be 100% certain that your gf doesn't want something.

I would've been happy with an engagement ring made out of an old guitar string (I even made one, and a matching band for him), but he's the one who wants me having something more traditional.

So again, to each his own, but definitely find out because an engagement ring isn't just for your engagement period. It's a ring for life.
 
I would say to get a traditional engagement ring. The bands you posted, while very pretty, are a risky choice UNLESS you know for certain that this is the type of ring she is looking forward to receiving as her once in a lifetime engagement ring.

The majority of girls I know are also very laid back and do not typically wear a lot of jewelry (some none at all) but when they went ring shopping or were asked what they liked, ALL chose a traditional engagement ring. I think the large majority of girls really look forward to it and I fear that she will be really disappointed to be denied this important token of your love and commitment.

It seems you are very open minded and concerned with what would make her happy so I am sure you will find out what it is that is in her heart and you will do what's best for her and make her HAPPY!! :)

Good luck!
 
My GF (now fiancee) has a similar band as her engagement ring. She too has simple tastes and never actually wears jewelry (until now). She loves her ring and it was perfect for her since she too is not into solitaires. I've attached a pic of my GF's ring, from Brian Gavin Diamonds.

scatteredband.jpg
 
oops, hit "send" too soon. I do agree that you need to guage her interest before you assume that she wouldn't want a traditional e-ring. I "knew" what my girl would want because she's made it known verbally ;)
 
I think "appropriate" means whatever you want! I think the bands are lovely, and if it's what you want, then YES it is appropriate. :wavey:
 
Why not pick it out together?
 
There is a lot of talk about the "traditional diamond solitaire" on here. Great job DeBeers, keep on cranking out that advertising!

There are a lot of places where a diamond solitaire isn't traditional. I'm not traditional, and while at first I considered a diamond solitaire, it didn't stick with me for long. Gemstone eternity? Elsa Peretti tsavorite or sapphire stacking band? Gemstone solitaire? Plain band? All of those are something that I considered for an ering. I ended up with a gemstone solitaire. And now that I'm married, I wear a gemstone eternity and a plain band on a day to day basis. And I own every single one of the rings I listed above. And yet, still no diamond solitaire.

Every woman is different. But as many others said, you need to find out what she wants. I think that starlight band is absolutely stunning. I'd like to have one some day. If my track record above says anything... :Up_to_something:
 
Maybe it is advertising that makes us think a diamond ring/solitaire is "traditional", but apparently its worked for generations and generations in my area. I have never, IRL seen someone that has something other than a diamond ring as their Ering. With that being said, your SO may or may not have that idea in her head, so definitely find out. She may want a scatter band, or eternity band, or gemstone ring, but I wouldn't assume either way.
 
I'm also in the camp of finding out exactly what she gravitates toward because while she may not be particular with her existing jewelry, she has been dreaming of the day you propose, and most likely has a clear and reasonable idea of what she sees herself wearing for the rest of her life.

I wore a simple white gold band when I met my husband, was very "jeans and t-shirt" and despite having almost 10k posts on PS these days, back then I was very uninterested in jewelry.

But, I always knew I wanted an emerald cut diamond or some other architecturally cut gemstone in a very low plain bezel setting.

However, practical and lovely these bands are, if given a choice, I might have opted for a more traditional narrower eternity band over something wider, so I think you really just need to ask her opinion on what she envisions for herself. She may surprise you. :bigsmile:
 
LaurenThePartier said:
I'm also in the camp of finding out exactly what she gravitates toward because while she may not be particular with her existing jewelry, she has been dreaming of the day you propose, and most likely has a clear and reasonable idea of what she sees herself wearing for the rest of her life.

I wore a simple white gold band when I met my husband, was very "jeans and t-shirt" and despite having almost 10k posts on PS these days, back then I was very uninterested in jewelry.

But, I always knew I wanted an emerald cut diamond or some other architecturally cut gemstone in a very low plain bezel setting.

However, practical and lovely these bands are, if given a choice, I might have opted for a more traditional narrower eternity band over something wider, so I think you really just need to ask her opinion on what she envisions for herself. She may surprise you. :bigsmile:
Click to expand...

SAY WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!

How many rings do you have now?!?!?!
 
Amys Bling said:
Maybe it is advertising that makes us think a diamond ring/solitaire is "traditional", but apparently its worked for generations and generations in my area. I have never, IRL seen someone that has something other than a diamond ring as their Ering. With that being said, your SO may or may not have that idea in her head, so definitely find out. She may want a scatter band, or eternity band, or gemstone ring, but I wouldn't assume either way.
Click to expand...
Interesting you say that.

I'd been admiring one of my co-worker's wedding sets for a couple of months and one day I commented how lovely it was. It's maybe a .4ct solitaire and a channel set band with rounds. She said thanks and told me that she didn't want a diamond solitaire for an ering and she had her husband get her a diamond eternity (what she wears as her wedding band). It served as both her engagement ring and her wedding ring. He had bought her a diamond solitaire necklace at one point as a gift, and one day she decided that she was tired of explaining that she didn't have a diamond solitaire ering, that the eternity was her ering, and she had the diamond from the necklace made into a solitaire ring. So thats what she wears.

I think that societal pressure has a lot to do with what people choose. It's not good or bad, it just IS.
 
Frekechild- Agreed! Its interesting to see what geographical location, societal, and cultural norms dictate...

for instance- many people on PR say how "uncommon" halos are in their area and have only seen 1 or 2 IRL, I have at least 5-8 newly engaged friends- coworkers- etc that all have halos. Same thing with carat size- here in the NYC metro area, a carat is the minimum someone exects and all my friends (mid twenties in age) have at least a carat, some ranging up to over 2 ct!

So I think many factors dictate what people "expect" and want. Gemstones and eternity bands as Erings are definitely a very small minority here... BUT I think that goes to show that you should find out about your GF and her "expectations" because as seen here on this thread, it could be any number of things...
 
Do NOT get her the starlight band without talking to her first. It's almost a guarantee that she'd much rather have a classic diamond solitaire than a starlight band.

Until right before I engaged I was not into jewelry at all. I wore no rings or earrings and the occasional necklace. And I'm not susceptible to societal norms, either. That said, I definitely wanted a diamond engagement ring, and that's exactly what I ended up with. And I'm not a blingy type AT ALL. But I ended up with a 1.5 carat diamond in a halo setting with baguette side stones and 3 sided pave on the band.

So once again, my opinion: do NOT get her the starlight band. If you're hoping to surprise her, a diamond solitaire is a lot safer. I would have been super disappointed if my now-husband proposed with a band instead of a more typical engagement ring.
 
I would definitely, definitely talk to her first. Societal pressure or not, most women do envision a traditional solitaire (or at least a diamond, and not a band) and it seems wise to check before proceeding. Most of my engaged/married friends don't care about jewelry but they all wanted a solitaire or a more traditional e-ring (three-stone, etc.) than a simple band.
 
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