Someone Followed us Home Last Night

[dragonfly411]

We were on our way home from my mom''s last night, and there is a spot where lanes merge, and this guy tried to pass us. If we had let him we would have had to slam on brakes, and endanger ourselves and others. So we didn''t let him pass us, and he ended up getting caught at the light. Well I guess he caught back up because he followed us into our neighborhood, and down our street!!!

We live in a townhouse complex, and he saw where we parked. He sat at the end of our street for a minute before leaving.

I didn''t call the police at the time because he left, but I''ve called and asked for increased patrolling tonight and tomorrow and gave a description of his car. I''m mostly just afraid he''d try to vandalize our vehicle? Hopefully he''ll just go away though.

SO is going to work on his vehicle at a friend''s shop tonight though, so while he''s gone I''m loading up, taking the pups to my family''s, going to the gym and going grocery shopping until he gets back.

 

[Maisie]

Wow, thats a bit scary. I hope he was just trying to be a tough guy and doesn''t bother coming back.

 

[monarch64]

He probably just wanted to give you a scare. Best thing to do is drive defensively, when you know a lane merge is coming up just be aware that there may be an a$$hole in the left lane who is going to try to cut over at the last second and be prepared to let them by slowing down. I seriously doubt he will come back and make it his mission in life to vandalize your vehicle, but he apparently saw your driving as aggressive and wants you to "get" that you pissed him off. People are idiots.

The older I get, the less I care about people cutting me off or being bad drivers in general. I assume the worst about everyone''s driving skills and am hyper aware of my fellow drivers. The attitude has saved me from many accidents, in fact I''ve never been involved in an accident with another vehicle.

A member of my family was arrested a few years ago for a road rage incident. A young girl was tailgating him and swerving back and forth to try to pass him on a narrow country road with no shoulder. He stopped in such a way that she couldn''t pass him, walked back to her vehicle to ask her what her problem was, and when she smarted off to him, he threw his fountain drink in her face. Are you kidding me??? Idiots.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Date: 3/5/2010 11:13:34 AM
Author: monarch64
He probably just wanted to give you a scare. Best thing to do is drive defensively, when you know a lane merge is coming up just be aware that there may be an a$$hole in the left lane who is going to try to cut over at the last second and be prepared to let them by slowing down. I seriously doubt he will come back and make it his mission in life to vandalize your vehicle, but he apparently saw your driving as aggressive and wants you to ''get'' that you pissed him off. People are idiots.

The older I get, the less I care about people cutting me off or being bad drivers in general. I assume the worst about everyone''s driving skills and am hyper aware of my fellow drivers. The attitude has saved me from many accidents, in fact I''ve never been involved in an accident with another vehicle.

A member of my family was arrested a few years ago for a road rage incident. A young girl was tailgating him and swerving back and forth to try to pass him on a narrow country road with no shoulder. He stopped in such a way that she couldn''t pass him, walked back to her vehicle to ask her what her problem was, and when she smarted off to him, he threw his fountain drink in her face. Are you kidding me??? Idiots.

Big ditto to this, but WOW, I can''t tell you how many times I wish I could have thrown a fountain drink in some kids face because they were driving like a jerk!

 

[princesss]

Sweetie, why did you go home? You never know what people will do - he could have gotten out of his car and done something awful. (Not trying to sound accusing - I'm scared something could have happened!)

Personally, when I feel somebody is following me, I drive to a gas station. I want someplace well-lit with video cameras so that if the jerk does anything, it's with witnesses and their face/license plate is potentially caught on tape.

 

[monarch64]

Date: 3/5/2010 11:36:18 AM
Author: princesss
Why did you go home? You never know what people will do - he could have gotten out of his car and done something awful.

Personally, when I feel somebody is following me, I drive to a gas station. I want someplace well-lit with video cameras so that if the jerk does anything, it''s with witnesses and their face/license plate is potentially caught on tape.

Princesss...gas stations are good places, or cop shops. I, however, prefer to drive to the ninja store. It helps to have ninjas on your side when faced with traffic adversity.

 

[princesss]

Date: 3/5/2010 11:37:39 AM
Author: monarch64

Date: 3/5/2010 11:36:18 AM
Author: princesss
Why did you go home? You never know what people will do - he could have gotten out of his car and done something awful.

Personally, when I feel somebody is following me, I drive to a gas station. I want someplace well-lit with video cameras so that if the jerk does anything, it''s with witnesses and their face/license plate is potentially caught on tape.

Princesss...gas stations are good places, or cop shops. I, however, prefer to drive to the ninja store. It helps to have ninjas on your side when faced with traffic adversity.

Ninjas *are* helpful in situations like that.

 

[rierie26]

What a creep! If I see someone driving like an a-hole, I try avoid them (sometimes, they are unavoidable though)because road rage can be a very scary thing.

 

[dragonfly411]

Date: 3/5/2010 11:36:18 AM
Author: princesss
Sweetie, why did you go home? You never know what people will do - he could have gotten out of his car and done something awful. (Not trying to sound accusing - I''m scared something could have happened!)


Personally, when I feel somebody is following me, I drive to a gas station. I want someplace well-lit with video cameras so that if the jerk does anything, it''s with witnesses and their face/license plate is potentially caught on tape.

Princess
At first we didn''t realize he was following us, because he was a bit behind us still, but when we turned into our neighborhood and he followed I happened to look back and see it was him.

Normally I agree though, well lit areas.

 

[princesss]

Date: 3/5/2010 11:41:46 AM
Author: dragonfly411

Date: 3/5/2010 11:36:18 AM
Author: princesss
Sweetie, why did you go home? You never know what people will do - he could have gotten out of his car and done something awful. (Not trying to sound accusing - I''m scared something could have happened!)


Personally, when I feel somebody is following me, I drive to a gas station. I want someplace well-lit with video cameras so that if the jerk does anything, it''s with witnesses and their face/license plate is potentially caught on tape.

Princess
At first we didn''t realize he was following us, because he was a bit behind us still, but when we turned into our neighborhood and he followed I happened to look back and see it was him.

Normally I agree though, well lit areas.

Gotcha! Be careful out there, hun. People are weirdos. (Also, I''m paranoid and assume everybody is following me until I get proof they''re not.)

 

[cnspotts]

That is so scary! They say to never go home if you realize that you''re being followed.

This happened last week to my friend as she left our house. Down the block two vehicles blocked her in at an intersection attempting to get her to roll down her window (they were bugging her about wanting to sell her drugs, thinking she was out looking for that). She called us in a panic (DH is police) stayed in her car attemping to continue to drive on, they let her pass but followed her. She drove around her neigborhood and stopped in front of another friend''s house but stayed in her car. They left her at that point but it freaked her out.

A few months ago a car seriously cut us off at an intersection by zooming at high speed around the traffic and jumping in front of us at at red light. DH "light flashed" them so they "brake checked" us (stomped on the brakes). DH gets out of the truck and walks up to the driver''s side taps on the window with his badge. They have a little conversation about her driving and never knowing who she might be pissing off in the future.

I think she pee''d her pants.

 

[jewelz617]

ACK! That''s so scary!!! You should have driven to the nearest police station, what a psycho! Once a guy in Virginia followed my car (on a very dark and long road out in the country) flashing his high beams and waving for me to pull over. Uh, no way pal.

I actually pulled into a police station and he kept driving. I gave a description of the vehicle but nothing ever came of it. Still scary!

 

[Bleed Burnt Orange]

That is crazy!!

I have had that happen to me one time. A girl followed me after I got in front of her. NOT by cutting her off, but sticking my car into her lane because my lane was blocked. It was at a red light, and I needed to be let into her lane. I got my car partially in front of hers. She started driving when the light turned green, like I wasn''t there, so I honked or she would have hit me.

She ended up following me closely. She gave up when I had to sit in traffic though. I had already called my bf to let him know I''d need some backup when I got to his place.

I WAS PISSED and worried, but it was broad daylight, a girl, and I had a few people for backup.

Be very careful!

 

[somethingshiny]

That sucks. Stay safe!

This is a good reminder for everyone. If you believe you''re being followed, pull into a public place and wait for the follower to leave before directing him to your home.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Date: 3/5/2010 12:26:43 PM
Author: cnspotts

A few months ago a car seriously cut us off at an intersection by zooming at high speed around the traffic and jumping in front of us at at red light. DH ''light flashed'' them so they ''brake checked'' us (stomped on the brakes). DH gets out of the truck and walks up to the driver''s side taps on the window with his badge. They have a little conversation about her driving and never knowing who she might be pissing off in the future.

I think she pee''d her pants.

Hah! That''s rather satisfying.

 

[VegasAngel]

Scary, if it ever happens again just drive around a bit until the go away.

I drive a lot better now than I used to. You want to cut me off go ahead, I slow down to let people in (Traffic flows better anyway) It''s just not worth taking the chance of angering the wrong person.

 

[Steel]

Sounds like you got a scare. I imagine you feel worried because you know you could have handled the situation better and he had cause to be pi$$ed off. If you would have had to jam on to prevent a collision if he were to have merged with you, then you were driving dangerously and didn''t anticipate correctly; didn''t you see him? Nevertheless, he too would have been behaving badly. I imagine it is lesson learned.

A little courtesy goes a long way; even if you were in the right.

 

[luckystar112]

Date: 3/5/2010 1:34:55 PM
Author: Steal
Sounds like you got a scare. I imagine you feel worried because you know you could have handled the situation better and he had cause to be pi$$ed off. If you would have had to jam on to prevent a collision if he were to have merged with you, then you were driving dangerously and didn''t anticipate correctly; didn''t you see him? Nevertheless, he too would have been behaving badly. I imagine it is lesson learned.

A little courtesy goes a long way; even if you were in the right.

Seriously?

Dragonfly had the right of way. If his lane was ending, it was HIS reponsibilty to merge safely into traffic--not slam on the gas and try to cut her off. Braking would have put her and the other motorists in danger. I am not seeing how you think dragonfly is somehow at fault for this.

 

[Indylady]

Date: 3/5/2010 2:05:53 PM
Author: luckystar112

Date: 3/5/2010 1:34:55 PM

Author: Steal

Sounds like you got a scare. I imagine you feel worried because you know you could have handled the situation better and he had cause to be pi$$ed off. If you would have had to jam on to prevent a collision if he were to have merged with you, then you were driving dangerously and didn''t anticipate correctly; didn''t you see him? Nevertheless, he too would have been behaving badly. I imagine it is lesson learned.


A little courtesy goes a long way; even if you were in the right.

Seriously?


Dragonfly had the right of way. If his lane was ending, it was HIS reponsibilty to merge safely into traffic--not slam on the gas and try to cut her off. Braking would have put her and the other motorists in danger. I am not seeing how you think dragonfly is somehow at fault for this.

+1 I don''t see why this would merit a driver following you to your house. Breaking suddenly could have resulted in a rear end collision (at least this is the first thing that comes to mind), and I don''t think it is fair, or even possible, to assert whether Dragonfly was "driving dangerously" or not. I don''t think getting caught at a traffic light is cause enough to be "pissed off" and make an attempt at vigilante justice.

 

[Haven]

That''s so scary, dragonfly. I''m glad to hear that no harm came of it.

You can always dial *999 if you feel like you are being followed or bullied on the road. They will put you in touch with the proper authorities, who will either send a car out to find you, or tell you the nearest safe place to pull over.

 

[Lilac]

Date: 3/5/2010 2:19:16 PM
Author: IndyLady

Date: 3/5/2010 2:05:53 PM

Author: luckystar112

Date: 3/5/2010 1:34:55 PM

Author: Steal

Sounds like you got a scare. I imagine you feel worried because you know you could have handled the situation better and he had cause to be pi$$ed off. If you would have had to jam on to prevent a collision if he were to have merged with you, then you were driving dangerously and didn't anticipate correctly; didn't you see him? Nevertheless, he too would have been behaving badly. I imagine it is lesson learned.

A little courtesy goes a long way; even if you were in the right.

Seriously?

Dragonfly had the right of way. If his lane was ending, it was HIS reponsibilty to merge safely into traffic--not slam on the gas and try to cut her off. Braking would have put her and the other motorists in danger. I am not seeing how you think dragonfly is somehow at fault for this.

+1 I don't see why this would merit a driver following you to your house. Breaking suddenly could have resulted in a rear end collision (at least this is the first thing that comes to mind), and I don't think it is fair, or even possible, to assert whether Dragonfly was 'driving dangerously' or not. I don't think getting caught at a traffic light is cause enough to be 'pissed off' and make an attempt at vigilante justice.

+2. There have been times I'm driving the speed limit (or maybe even less) and someone is driving so close to the back of my car that I can't let someone merge into my lane because if I tried to slow down the person would hit me from behind. Just because hitting the brakes would have endangered herself and others doesn't mean it was necessarily dragonfly's fault that she couldn't slow down. I don't really see how she can be blamed for this at all.

ETA: I'm sorry that happened, dragonfly, and I'm glad you're ok.

 

[monarch64]

Date: 3/5/2010 2:05:53 PM
Author: luckystar112

Date: 3/5/2010 1:34:55 PM
Author: Steal
Sounds like you got a scare. I imagine you feel worried because you know you could have handled the situation better and he had cause to be pi$$ed off. If you would have had to jam on to prevent a collision if he were to have merged with you, then you were driving dangerously and didn''t anticipate correctly; didn''t you see him? Nevertheless, he too would have been behaving badly. I imagine it is lesson learned.

A little courtesy goes a long way; even if you were in the right.

Seriously?

Dragonfly had the right of way. If his lane was ending, it was HIS reponsibilty to merge safely into traffic--not slam on the gas and try to cut her off. Braking would have put her and the other motorists in danger. I am not seeing how you think dragonfly is somehow at fault for this.

I don''t think Steal is saying DF is at fault. I think she is saying the same thing I did earlier--that driving defensively and maintaining awareness is important. No one should''ve had to slam on their breaks, a merge doesn''t happen on a sharp curve, it typically is on a straight stretch of highway, where drivers can see other drivers in relation to their own vehicle. I wasn''t there, of course, but I''ve seen this happen a million times and I''m not buying it that a random car came out of NOWHERE and tried to cut off DF so that she had no choice but to speed up and not let him in rather than SLAM ON the brakes causing a possible pileup behind her.

 

[kenny]

Did the driver look creepy, like this?

 

[luckystar112]

In my opinion Dragonfly WAS driving defensively by maintaining her current speed on a road that she clearly had the right of way on, and by not braking and putting herself and the other motorists in danger.
Yes, merging lanes are often straight. They also typically have a sign or two well in advance notifying the driver that he will need to merge. If he would have hit her, he would have been at fault. If there were multiple lanes she could have moved over one, but they way she is describing it sounds like two lanes were merging into one. So was she supposed to speed? Brake and cause a collision? Sounds like the jerk thinks he owns the road. It's clearly not that he was in a rush to make the light, since he followed her all the way to her house like psycho.

ETA: I just want to say that I have this happen to me all the time where I live. There are clear signs saying that two lanes are about to merge into one and some guy always slams on the gas so he can be in the "front of the line". It drives me insane because it is so dangerous!

 

[monarch64]

Date: 3/5/2010 2:59:05 PM
Author: luckystar112
In my opinion Dragonfly WAS driving defensively by maintaining her current speed on a road that she clearly had the right of way on, and by not braking and putting herself and the other motorists in danger.
Yes, merging lanes are often straight. They also typically have a sign or two well in advance notifying the driver that he will need to merge. If he would have hit her, he would have been at fault. If there were multiple lanes she could have moved over one, but they way she is describing it sounds like two lanes were merging into one. So was she supposed to speed? Brake and cause a collision? Sounds like the jerk thinks he owns the road. It''s clearly not that he was in a rush to make the light, since he followed her all the way to her house like psycho.

I''m not disputing that if he hit her, he would have been at fault. I''m just saying people are idiots and that driving defensively sometimes means you need to be more aware of what others are doing and anticipate what they might do, plus plan your escape route at the same time, rather than saying, "oh, I have the right of way, so I''m not backing down, I''ll continue on at this speed because my only other choice at this point is to slam on the brakes." It doesn''t matter whose fault a collision would have been in this case. It''s all about assuming the worst and planning your escape route. Always envision worst case scenario and be prepared and aware while driving.

 

[luckystar112]

We can agree to disagree. I''m the most defensive driver I know (I don''t get on the freeway or drive in the rain, I stay in the right hand lane on any road, unless I have to turn left up ahead, etc.) but I have still been in the position where a perfect storm is created and any decision I make may not be a good one. Then again, most of the roads I take are 50mph, run parallel to the freeway (so people are always exiting and trying to merge with us) and have multiple stop lights.

 

[monarch64]

Date: 3/5/2010 3:12:26 PM
Author: luckystar112
We can agree to disagree. I''m the most defensive driver I know (I don''t get on the freeway or drive in the rain, I stay in the right hand lane on any road, unless I have to turn left up ahead, etc.) but I have still been in the position where a perfect storm is created and any decision I make may not be a good one. Then again, most of the roads I take are 50mph, run parallel to the freeway (so people are always exiting and trying to merge with us) and have multiple stop lights.

Yes. Without seeing the actual road DF was traveling or the situation as it was happening I can''t say exactly what I would have done. I''m thinking of situations where a 4-5 lane, undivided highway turns into 2 lanes...things like that where you have more time to act or react to a weirdo driver.

 

[dragonfly411]

Just to clarify a bit. The merger happens in such a way that the other driver''s lane turns into a turn only lane... so he could have easily been turning as well, but we got the message that he wasn''t when he tried to speed past us just before the intersection.

I definitely understand the perspective of driving defensively and am normally the first person to open up a spot when someone needs over, but doing so in this case could have been dangerous for several drivers, not just ourselves or him. There was one vehicle behind us, and one to our left turning left. The one behind us turned just after the intersection.


Thanks guys, it was definitely a scare! We kept the vehicle on and stayed in until he was gone in hopes that he''d think we weren''t going to stay there. But I did give a description of his vehicle so that when they patrol if they see him they know to ask him to vacate.

 

[Steel]

Clearly the other driver agreed with me.

The world is about more than right or wrong; it is great to believe that you were in the right when you are knocking on the pearly gates. Isn''t it better to be safe than right?

If a man shoots his gun at you and you are within your rights to stand in that spot; wouldn''t you move to avoid being shot even if you felt you were right? It is all about being aware of your surroundings and reacting appropriately in a timely fashion.

 

[dragonfly411]

Steal where exactly was I supposed to move?

Sorry but I think you''re a bit out of line on this one. Even IF it hadn''t been a good move on my end.... it doesn''t give him the right to follow us home. Would you be a creeper and follow someone home because you couldn''t move over??? We were in the straight lane... him in a turn lane... he had been driving next to us for some distance and easily had time to either speed up or slow down before hand, but chose to literally 20-30 feet from the intersection? And I''m wrong?