Should I trade in my RB 3.02 ct F VS2 for a 5.17ct J VVS cushion?

[Phoenix]

I went to see my local dealer today and he showed me this beautiful cushion, a whopping 5.17 ct. It was really gorgeous (though obviously not as sparkly/ firey as a RB). It wasn't a modifiied brilliant, it didn't have a crushed ice look, rather it had more of an antique-y look to it, with chunky facets.

I was really amazed that it was a J colour. If he hadn't told me, I definitely would have thought it was a G colour, H top.

He wanted USD28k for the upgrade. He didn't want to *just* buy my 3 carater. I would have to upgrade with him (ie. sell him my 3ct RB *and* buy the cushion from him). He promised that I could upgrade again in the future if I want to. But I guess this is only as good as long as he's in business (he's been trading in S'pore for the last several decades. I think he might even be Singaporean by citizenship).

So should I do this? Is the USD28k too much or just about right?

Another thing I'm concerned about is whether I would like the cushion look? It certainly isn't as firey as a RB. I wonder if PS'ers that own cushions ever have any regret? I've only ever owned RB's and about to own a couple of pears but not sure if I would like the cushion look on my e-ring. I do think it is quite beautiful in an understated kind of way. But would I miss the fire of the RB?

Last but not least, I've always thought I was extremely colour sensitive, but honestly, this just did not look like a J to me. I'm concerned however that as I know that it is a J, would I be bothered by it? Would it be a "mind-clean" (for lack of a better word) issue for me?

I really really wish I didn't suffer from DSS, the darn thing!!

 

[Isabelle]

I''m no expert, but I have a 1.15 RB solitaire and for my 10 year, I got a 2.84 modified cushion cut. Now the stone in my new ring is a tanzanite, but even taking that into account, I have to say that without question, the cushion cut is a totally different look from a RB. It is a totally different, subdued, elegant look. It''s an antique look. It''s sophisticated. It''s Edwardian. And I really LOVE my cushion cut ring. But only you know how much you want to see sparkle that only a RB can produce. And something else to consider is whether you will miss your RB. If it is your original engagement diamond and you sell it, you might end up really missing it later on. Hope this helps, but essentially it really comes down to what you want.

 

[Ellen]

I don''t really know what to tell you, especially because I''m not a size girl per se, so I may look at things differently. To me, my gut instinct says, I''d miss the sparkle from a round.

What does your gut say Lien? Because it''s almost always right.

 

[mrssalvo]

i honestly don''t know what to tell you either. it does seem you''ve been dissatified with your round for some time so I''d be all for you upgrading into something different. my only advice would be to not settle just to make it happen faster or b/c you want size right away. a 5 carat cushion has got to be amazing. the J color wouldn''t be my personal choice but you''ve seen it and are happy so it might be the one?

i agree with ellen, what do you think is the right thing to do? when i purchased my upgraded round, i had so many difficulties commiting to a setting etc. I finally realized my issue was not the setting but that i really wanted a cushion so I traded the stone back. when the daniel k ring came up at pearlmans i had no doubts or troubles commiting b/c i just knew it was exactly everything i''d dream of an more. all that to say, just don''t settle if you''re not sure, the right thing will come along

 

[Ellen]

Date: 3/25/2008 10:16:41 AM
Author: mrssalvo
i agree with ellen, what do you think is the right thing to do? when i purchased my upgraded round, i had so many difficulties commiting to a setting etc. I finally realized my issue was not the setting but that i really wanted a cushion so I traded the stone back. when the daniel k ring came up at pearlmans i had no doubts or troubles commiting b/c i just knew it was exactly everything i''d dream of an more. all that to say, just don''t settle if you''re not sure, the right thing will come along

Exactly.

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

It is a tough call. When I was shopping for my upgrade, I definately thought I wanted another round since that was all I knew. But when I saw my ring--that was it. Sometimes it happens like that, you want a change and you find something that calls to you. Is that happening here for you Phoenix?

I am not suggeting that I do not miss my round--I do, but am happy with my choice; the faceting arrangement on my radiant renders it very "sparkly". However on one point--color--I will suggest that I can see the body color in my H, and another time I would go higher in color for the same cut. But I don''t know that cushions "hold" their color like radaints have a propensity to.

Any chance we could see picutres of this gem?? I dearly love cushions.....

cheers--Sharon

 

[vespergirl]

Hi Phoenix! I just LOVE your RB. I switched from a 2.25 ct asscher to a 2.01 ct RB and am so much happier with the extra sparkle & size. The RB looks whiter than the asscher did too, because of the white light reflection, even though my RB is a G and my asscher was an F.

I think that the cushion will probably face up slightly larger than your RB, but you will definitely notice the fact that it''s going to have some color - body color is a lot more noticable in antique cuts, and in larger stones in particular. Plus, it won''t have the fire or brilliance of your RB.

I''m sure that the cushion is gorgeous, but I would be hesitant to go for something in a much lower color that isn''t an RB... but that''s just my 2 cents ... I''m sure that it''s a gorgeous stone, though, and if you go for it, I can''t wait to see hand shots!

 

[Jenn5504]

They way your post sounds to me, you''re not so sure about this trade. That alone makes me suggest you hold out for now.

As for RB to cushion, I''d likely switch to a cushion if I was lucky enough to be looking at such HUGE rocks like you are.

I love RB''s until a certain size then I start to prefer different cuts, like antique cuts, cushions, etc. But the J, EVEN for my J/K lovin'' self, would concern me with such a large stone and it not being a RB. I know it''s NOT this simple, especially when you start getting up in size like this cushion is, but it''s a shame it''s not a VS and a higher color.

Either way, since you asked for everyones input, my vote is to pass this time.

 

[Phoenix]

Thanks very much for your replies and comments, everyone.

Isabelle, I think you have the analysis right. The cushion does have different, understated elegance to it that is quite different from the RB. My 3.02ct RB is my 10th year anniversary present from hubby, but unlike my e-ring, I picked it out so it doesn't have as much sentiment as my e-ring (sorry, I am not being very sentimental or grateful, I hope hubby doesn't read this

).

Ellen, as always, you got it SPOT ON!! My gut is telling me not to. As much of a size wh*** as I am, I think the sheer size (and it IS BIG) does not make up for BOTH the lack of fire and the lower colour (even thought it really does not look like a J, more like a G, but it is a "mind thing" for me). I think if it was a 5 carat cushion G VS2 (rather than J VVS), I could really like it. I do think that it is a beautiful stone, absolutely, but I don't think I can get over the colour thing, as well as the lack of fire in a RB (I'd miss it too much).

Mrs Salvo, it's interesting what you say about the settings and the RB. I wouldn't say that I am "dissatisfied" with my RB. I actually do love the whiteness of it and the amazing fire that it gives out. I remember when I first saw it at the dealer's office, I was totally mesmerised with it. It was only afterwards that I had some reservations, first about the colour (which is in fact a total non-issue, I think I was freaking out because I'd never owned a stone of this size before and I was comparing it to my 1caraters and of course the bigger stone holds more body colour, but the difference is totally absolutely marginal. I can't see it at all now and everytime I look at it, I am just amazed at how beautifully white it is). The only regret I've ever had is that I should have shopped for a bigger stone, a 4ct and above, as DSS set in almost immediately. I am almost 100% convinced (like 99.99%) that if I owned a 4 or 5 ct stone of the same quality as I have now, I would never ever think about trading it in (but for sure I would still be yearning for a second diamond - maybe a Lucida or a HW, he he

). LOVE yr Daniel K btw

.

Also, you're right, (you too, Ellen) I should just wait for the right one to come along. It's been 1 1/2 yrs, so I can still wait a little longer (but not too much longer I hope!

)

 

[Phoenix]

Canuk-gal, Love your ring btw. I think the cushion does not hold the colour as much as radiant. I think I am going to miss my RB too much. I don''t think I can take a photo, esp. now that I''ve decided not to go for it.

Vespergirl, I love yr RB much more than your Asscher, and it looks HUGE on yr slim finger. Another vote for the classic RB, yay!!

Jenn, another vote for not going for the cushion!! yay!!

. You''re right, when i read back what i wrote, I DO sound unsure, don''t I? I do love larger fancy cuts, but it think it has to be at least a G for me, on paper as well as in looks. I was thinking the same exact thing, why can''t it be a G VS instead of J VVS but with stones this large, it''s very difficult to get what you want in the budget that you have (or rather *my* budget).

Thanks again, everyone.

 

[tberube]

Everyone is different, but I love cushions, because I love the chunky facets and the slightly "imperfect" look of them...I''m not a RB fan at all. But I think it''s all about what you fall in love with...right?

Good luck on your whopper!

 

[surfgirl]

Bottom line, if this was the stone for you, you wouldn't be on PS asking for validation on the trade. You would just know that it was "the one". At least that's how I "know" when something is meant to be.

ETA: Bigger isn't always better. You seem to say that you have a lovely RB that you really love. Can I ask why do you want to trade it? I'm always wondering if the women who feel so much DSS will ever be happy with any size or if it's a neverending situation. I'm not saying that's you, but I'm not getting why you want to trade this stone/ring if it's so pretty???

 

[Phoenix]

Date: 3/26/2008 9:22:34 AM
Author: tberube
Everyone is different, but I love cushions, because I love the chunky facets and the slightly 'imperfect' look of them...I'm not a RB fan at all. But I think it's all about what you fall in love with...right?

Good luck on your whopper!

Yes, that's right. Everyone has different tastes, and that's what makes it all interesting, makes the world go round...so to speak.

I do love cushions, but instinctively, I feel that *everyone" (translating into = me, LOL) should have a RB as a basic, and then on top of that, a fancy cut diamond. Oh, how I wish that money was no object and I had several diamonds of different cuts...oh well...I can dream, right?

Thanks for your kind wishes. I 'll need it when I go to bid on an auction for my second diamond.

 

[Phoenix]

Date: 3/26/2008 12:01:28 PM
Author: surfgirl
Bottom line, if this was the stone for you, you wouldn''t be on PS asking for validation on the trade. You would just know that it was ''the one''. At least that''s how I ''know'' when something is meant to be.

ETA: Bigger isn''t always better. You seem to say that you have a lovely RB that you really love. Can I ask why do you want to trade it? I''m always wondering if the women who feel so much DSS will ever be happy with any size or if it''s a neverending situation. I''m not saying that''s you, but I''m not getting why you want to trade this stone/ring if it''s so pretty???

I think you may be onto something there, surfgirl. I suspect you''re prob right in that if it''s "the one", I''d know. Nevertheless, I value PS''ers'' opinions and would like to get double confirmation just in case I''m making a mistake (an expensive one too!).

I do LOVE my RB but I would really like a RB that''s a smidgen (sp?) bigger. I think a 5ct and above in RB would be a tad too big for my 4.25-4.5 size finger, but I am sure I could accomodate larger fancy cuts, he he.

.

I really do hope that''s its not a never-ending situation. I know for a fact that our budget would not be able to stretch much more than what I currently have in mind.

Thanks for your honest and candid opinion.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I would say that in 99.5% of circumstances, most people would think a 3 carat stone is HUGE on a size 4 finger! I am not really sure why you see it as small. Do the women in your social circle wear 4-5 carat diamonds? I just wondered.

I''d love to have a cushion for a second diamond! But as others have said, we can tell you have not fallen in love with the one you''re being offered. I''d keep the 3 ct. round and look for another shape in 3 cts. for a right hand ring if it was me (in my wildest dreams, that is!).

 

[UCLABelle]

I totally understand wanting to upgrade, or change...but I am not sure I would personally want to go from an "F" to a "J"....perhaps you could meet somewhere in the middle ("H"?)...

Cushion are really nice though, but I am afraid that in that HUGE size, the color may be more noticeable...

p.s. a 3 carat is HUGE on your finger....

 

[surfgirl]

Date: 3/27/2008 12:20:12 PM
Author: diamondseeker2006
I would say that in 99.5% of circumstances, most people would think a 3 carat stone is HUGE on a size 4 finger! I am not really sure why you see it as small. Do the women in your social circle wear 4-5 carat diamonds? I just wondered.

I''d love to have a cushion for a second diamond! But as others have said, we can tell you have not fallen in love with the one you''re being offered. I''d keep the 3 ct. round and look for another shape in 3 cts. for a right hand ring if it was me (in my wildest dreams, that is!).

Excellent advice!

 

[Phoenix]

Date: 3/27/2008 12:20:12 PM
Author: diamondseeker2006
I would say that in 99.5% of circumstances, most people would think a 3 carat stone is HUGE on a size 4 finger! I am not really sure why you see it as small. Do the women in your social circle wear 4-5 carat diamonds? I just wondered.

I'd love to have a cushion for a second diamond! But as others have said, we can tell you have not fallen in love with the one you're being offered. I'd keep the 3 ct. round and look for another shape in 3 cts. for a right hand ring if it was me (in my wildest dreams, that is!).

DS, I know I have a sickness LOL, what can I say? No, to answer your question, women in my social circle do not have 4-5ct diamonds. Well, one girl (more of an acquaintance than a friend) has a 6ct RB that her mother has given to her, but it is not very well cut and dare I say it, rather yellow looking (not fancy yellow, but like an N or something). Funny thing, this girl is not even into diamonds, she hardly ever wears this ring (I've only even seen her wear it once) or any other bling for that matter. My other friends are mostly not into diamonds, perhaps 2 or 3. One in particular has a 3 carat princess cut with a halo and 4cwt princess earrings which I know she has but I've never seen her wear them. Funny thing is it's not her who's into diamonds, it's her husband that's bought these things for her. Funny thing is I don't see this girl anywhere near as often as I used to. Another one has a 2.7ct uncertified RB which she absolutely loves and yet another 2 also love diamonds but one has a 2ct (a beautiful one) and the other yearns for a 3ct but is too busy spending all her time (looking after the construction of their new house) to actually go out and get one.

I am not sure where my "diamond sickness" as my husband jokingly calls it some time LOL (but funnily, he's the one behind practically all my/ our diamond purchases) comes from. I just know I LOOOVEEE diamonds, they just fascinate me so; and being on PS has NOT help either.

Yes, I haven't fallen into with the cushion and have already told the dealer who I gather is not too pleased. Oh well.

Btw, I think one has to dream in the first place in order to turn that dream into reality and I'm sure you'll get your 3ct cushion RHR one day.

 

[Phoenix]

Date: 3/27/2008 12:42:02 PM
Author: UCLABelle
I totally understand wanting to upgrade, or change...but I am not sure I would personally want to go from an ''F'' to a ''J''....perhaps you could meet somewhere in the middle (''H''?)...

Cushion are really nice though, but I am afraid that in that HUGE size, the color may be more noticeable...

p.s. a 3 carat is HUGE on your finger....

Thank you, UCLABelle. Yes, I agree with you also about the colour.

I wish I thought that 3ct is HUGE on my finger. Again, darn you, you DSS!!

 

[diamondnut]

Hi Phoenix,

Just wanted to drop you a note to let you know that you were sooooo right about DSS when you replied to one of my earlier posts. I was asking everyone how I should spend my upgrade budget. I especially remember your ''warning'' because you live in Singapore (I live in HK) and knew exactly what kind of social environment I''m in.

Anyways, to make a long story short, I ended up with a 2.51 ct RB E VS1 (originally I had my heart set on a 2.25ish ct D VS1). I ended up with the 2.51 almost by accident cuz that''s the best match my jeweler had on hand during the time I was back home in NY. Now I''m sooooo glad I wound up with a larger stone (though only slightly larger but nonetheless larger) cuz it''s not looking so large any more. Before I got the upgrade, I thought I would be absolutely, completely, without a doubt overjoyed with this size but the honest truth is, i''m not as overjoyed as i thought . I''m embarrassed to admit this and feel really materialistic. Just had to get it off my chest...hope you don''t mind.

 

[Maisie]

You know there are people who will never get DSS much less understand it. It doesn''t make it wrong. People are different and want different things.

Wouldn''t the world be a boring place if we all liked the same things

If this new diamond isn''t calling to you then maybe pass on it? You will know the right one when you see it.

 

[Diamond*Dana]

Date: 3/26/2008 8:51:57 AM
Author: Phoenix
Thanks very much for your replies and comments, everyone.
Ellen, as always, you got it SPOT ON!! My gut is telling me not to. As much of a size wh*** as I am, I think the sheer size (and it IS BIG) does not make up for BOTH the lack of fire and the lower colour (even thought it really does not look like a J, more like a G, but it is a ''mind thing'' for me). I think if it was a 5 carat cushion G VS2 (rather than J VVS), I could really like it. I do think that it is a beautiful stone, absolutely, but I don''t think I can get over the colour thing, as well as the lack of fire in a RB (I''d miss it too much).


Also, you''re right, (you too, Ellen) I should just wait for the right one to come along. It''s been 1 1/2 yrs, so I can still wait a little longer (but not too much longer I hope!

)

This right here would make me say that you should wait and hold on to what you have. If you are not feeling it with this cushion then I would have to think that it is not the stone for you.

 

[roppongi]

Lien,

Isn''t DSS awful? Truthfully, I don''t think it ever ends. I just went through this earlier this year as I was going to upgrade my F/SI1, 3 carat RBC for an E /VS2, 5 carat emerald cut. The stone was gorgeous, and my husband loved it to boot. I thought long and hard on the change but at the end, I just couldn''t pull the trigger. The EC was stunning, but I would have missed all the fire and the brilliance of my round.

At the end I had a new 7 ctw, rbc eternity band made, and we are going to purchase matching watches.

Definitely pass on the cushion since it''s not calling you and maybe think about having another piece of bling made.

Good luck and let us know what you decide to do.

Roppongi

 

[lovewhitediamonds]

Date: 3/30/2008 2:47:26 PM
Author: roppongi
Lien,

Isn''t DSS awful? Truthfully, I don''t think it ever ends. I just went through this earlier this year as I was going to upgrade my F/SI1, 3 carat RBC for an E /VS2, 5 carat emerald cut. The stone was gorgeous, and my husband loved it to boot. I thought long and hard on the change but at the end, I just couldn''t pull the trigger. The EC was stunning, but I would have missed all the fire and the brilliance of my round.

At the end I had a new 7 ctw, rbc eternity band made, and we are going to purchase matching watches.

Definitely pass on the cushion since it''s not calling you and maybe think about having another piece of bling made.

Good luck and let us know what you decide to do.

Roppongi

I believe DSS is like a virus--- some people are immune and others are afflicted.
However, even with a bigger diamond there is no cure... as one day that bigger diamond becomes "not big enough" once again.....

Good luck with your decision! (I think you should continue to search -- that''s half the fun too!)

 

[Gypsy]

Okay. So I''ve seen this thread for days now, and I''ve been thinking about it.

I don''t think this is the right stone for you. You''ve already been waiting for years, I think the right one will come along. And I totally understand the DSS, but the lack of fire and the low color for me would be a no. I''d listen to your gut.

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 3/25/2008 10:26:54 AM
Author: Ellen

Date: 3/25/2008 10:16:41 AM
Author: mrssalvo
i agree with ellen, what do you think is the right thing to do? when i purchased my upgraded round, i had so many difficulties commiting to a setting etc. I finally realized my issue was not the setting but that i really wanted a cushion so I traded the stone back. when the daniel k ring came up at pearlmans i had no doubts or troubles commiting b/c i just knew it was exactly everything i''d dream of an more. all that to say, just don''t settle if you''re not sure, the right thing will come along

Exactly.

I agree w/both Ellen, Mrs. S and DS. I would wait for the right one to come along. Btw, I love your stone!!

 

[DiamanteBlu]

You will know when the right stone comes along. It will be "calling" out to you.

ETA Now, this comment may be less than useful but when I got my EC it "called" out to me. DH suggested trading it in for thr RB and I refused to part with it. Now DH wants to upgrade [I posted some pics on another thread]. He wants and eightstar and I want an antique looking cushion but am afraid I'll miss the RB. Sooooo . . . the only answer has to be: One of each, please.

 

[Kissmark]

I dont own a cushion but just by reading your post, I dont think you shoudl upgrade. Your original post shows that you have some doubts and concerns about the color. I agree with the others, the right diamond will come along, just be a little patient!

 

[Phoenix]

Date: 3/30/2008 12:30:31 PM
Author: diamondnut
Hi Phoenix,

Just wanted to drop you a note to let you know that you were sooooo right about DSS when you replied to one of my earlier posts. I was asking everyone how I should spend my upgrade budget. I especially remember your 'warning' because you live in Singapore (I live in HK) and knew exactly what kind of social environment I'm in.

Anyways, to make a long story short, I ended up with a 2.51 ct RB E VS1 (originally I had my heart set on a 2.25ish ct D VS1). I ended up with the 2.51 almost by accident cuz that's the best match my jeweler had on hand during the time I was back home in NY. Now I'm sooooo glad I wound up with a larger stone (though only slightly larger but nonetheless larger) cuz it's not looking so large any more. Before I got the upgrade, I thought I would be absolutely, completely, without a doubt overjoyed with this size but the honest truth is, i'm not as overjoyed as i thought . I'm embarrassed to admit this and feel really materialistic. Just had to get it off my chest...hope you don't mind.

Hi there Diamondnut

,

Yes, I do remember you and yr thread as well as my "warning", LOL. I'm sooo glad you went with the larger stone. Believe me, 1/4ct does make a difference. Aren't Singapore and HK aweful? Practically everyone (or at least those who are into diamonds) is *obsessed* with the higher colour and clarity AS WELL AS size!!

. Even though most of my friends couldn't care less about diamonds, I see these "tai-tais" walking around with these beautiful big honkers and I suspect that's the source of my diamond sickness, LOL (along with PS!!

), which is kind of silly on my part, cos I don't know them let alone being able to keep up with them at all (not a chance in a million years!). I just think that their rings make me drool and fuel my diamond addiction!

. The shops with their humongous (sp?) stones don't help either.

No, you're not materialistic at all. I'm there with you, sister!

. I'm glad that we're able to share and relate to this.

 

[cutey TT]

Date: 3/31/2008 8:56:31 AM
Author: Phoenix

Date: 3/30/2008 12:30:31 PM
Author: diamondnut
Hi Phoenix,

Just wanted to drop you a note to let you know that you were sooooo right about DSS when you replied to one of my earlier posts. I was asking everyone how I should spend my upgrade budget. I especially remember your ''warning'' because you live in Singapore (I live in HK) and knew exactly what kind of social environment I''m in.

Anyways, to make a long story short, I ended up with a 2.51 ct RB E VS1 (originally I had my heart set on a 2.25ish ct D VS1). I ended up with the 2.51 almost by accident cuz that''s the best match my jeweler had on hand during the time I was back home in NY. Now I''m sooooo glad I wound up with a larger stone (though only slightly larger but nonetheless larger) cuz it''s not looking so large any more. Before I got the upgrade, I thought I would be absolutely, completely, without a doubt overjoyed with this size but the honest truth is, i''m not as overjoyed as i thought . I''m embarrassed to admit this and feel really materialistic. Just had to get it off my chest...hope you don''t mind.

Hi there Diamondnut

,

Yes, I do remember you and yr thread as well as my ''warning'', LOL. I''m sooo glad you went with the larger stone. Believe me, 1/4ct does make a difference. Aren''t Singapore and HK aweful? Practically everyone (or at least those who are into diamonds) is *obsessed* with the higher colour and clarity AS WELL AS size!!

. Even though most of my friends couldn''t care less about diamonds, I see these ''tai-tais'' walking around with these beautiful big honkers and I suspect that''s the source of my diamond sickness, LOL (along with PS!!

), which is kind of silly on my part, cos I don''t know them let alone being able to keep up with them at all (not a chance in a million years!). I just think that their rings make me drool and fuel my diamond addiction!

. The shops with their humongous (sp?) stones don''t help either.

No, you''re not materialistic at all. I''m there with you, sister!

. I''m glad that we''re able to share and relate to this.

I''m right there with both of you. First of all, Phoenix / Lien - I would agree with all the PPs in that I don''t think this J cushion is THE ONE. Honestly, an F to a J is a big jump in color and personally, I wouldn''t do it. You already have a (big) beautiful stone, so I would just sit back and wait for the *perfect* one to come along -- cuz it eventually will.

I just got a new 2.75 in the Michael B setting, and I hate to admit it as well, but it doesn''t look huge on me...which makes me a little sad. I love the blinginess of the setting and matching w-band...and the new stone sparkles like crazy, but I had really wanted a 3+ and the fraction of the millimeter is making all the difference to me. I think something is wrong with my eyes!