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should i get involve with our daughters Ering?

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 3, 2004
Messages
32,049
wife told our daughters...when you girls get engage you better ask your daddy about diamonds or else we will never hear teh end of it! :lol:

so my Q is...would it be rude of me to be involve with their Erings?
 

mayerling

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 4, 2010
Messages
2,357
I think it's perfectly fine. Also, I'm assuming they already know about your diamond expertise so they'll probably come to you on their own.
 

maplefemme

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
May 12, 2011
Messages
874
Depends so much on the son-law-to-be...

If he asks your permission to marry, you could certainly offer your expertise and he may really appreciate it and take you up on it or he might want to do it all himself.
He may not ask you, he may not give her the slightest idea he plans to propose and it'll be a surprise for all of you.
He may involve her in the ring buying process and she might ask you to help, or she might want to surprise you. My family have no clue about us picking out a diamond recently and I can't wait to surprise them, however, they know nothing about diamonds but if they did I'd likely ask their advice.
If he knows you know your stuff about diamonds before hand, he may seek your advice, knowing you could really help. I guess it really depends on him and the kind of friendship you two have developed prior.

Thankfully, my guy wouldn't buy a coffee maker without researching it to death, and if he knew my Father knew anything about diamonds, he'd seek his council, those two get along great and are always conspiring! :twisted:
 

wannaBMrsH

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Sep 27, 2008
Messages
1,049
I would wait until their partner asks you for help and then give it unabashedly.

It's hard to ask someone for their daughter's hand in marriage AND for help choosing a diamond. He could be out researching night and day to impress you if he knows that you are the diamond connoisseur in the family...
 

iheartscience

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 1, 2007
Messages
12,111
Dancing Fire|1307909720|2944203 said:
wife told our daughters...when you girls get engage you better ask your daddy about diamonds or else we will never hear teh end of it! :lol:

so my Q is...would it be rude of me to be involve with their Erings?
Not if they're okay with it. And after seeing the diamonds and jewelry you get for your wife, I can't imagine they'd have a problem with it! I know I wouldn't! :cheeky:
 

marcy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 27, 2007
Messages
23,944
Hopefully they'll be wise enough to ask. When my niece was getting engaged she and her fiance asked me to take them shopping so I went with them, have them compare some different cuts of diamonds, then had them compare color and clarity. After the diamond class I showed them things to look for in the ring then left them alone. My niece didn't see any difference in cut or color but her fiance did and got her a very nice diamond from Blue Nile.
 

Imdanny

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 21, 2008
Messages
6,186
Well I think you should. You don't want them to end up with a ring from a mall store. ;(
 

Italiahaircolor

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 16, 2007
Messages
5,184
Sorry, but no. Not unless you're directly asked by your FSIL.

You're educated, and I know that you'd probably enjoy helping...but you may also put someone in a position that would be potentially uncomfortable and embarrassing.

For instance, if your FSIL couldn't afford a very large or very expensive ring, it might be a source of embarrassment for him. I'm sure you'd never look down on him for something like that, but he's obviously still in the position of trying to impress you and show that he can take care of your daughter.

If you're asked...yes. If you're not, no.
 

MichelleCarmen

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Feb 8, 2003
Messages
15,880
Yes, it would be extremely rude of you to be involved in their Ering purchases UNLESS you're asked for help. You're implying that you know all about diamonds and are assuming they know nothing.
 

HollyS

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 18, 2007
Messages
6,099
Uh, have you learned nothing here?

No. Don't. Get. Involved.

Not unless they ask. Then, by all means, impart knowledge.
 

zoebartlett

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 29, 2006
Messages
12,450
I don't see anything wrong with it. Maybe your daughters will put in a good word for you with their FIs so they enlist your help.
 

jewelerman

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Sep 30, 2007
Messages
3,101
get involved by educating your daughter.Let her know that you are looking out for her e-ring well fare and when she needs an engagement ring you will educate her and she can bring that knowledge with her and her fierce to the store so they can make an educated choice and i bet the young man will be asking her to get you involved when he knows that you can save him money,time and stress when dealing with the details.At the very least,offer to help them make make THE FINAL DECISION after they have shopped together, got several options and had that experience together as a couple.
 

suchende

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Apr 14, 2008
Messages
1,001
I feel like knowing too much about diamonds is biting me in the rear now. I would much prefer my BF do his own research and use his own judgement, but he would rather just defer to me and let me pick it out myself. That's definitely not what i'd had in mind. That extends to my parents: I don't want the ring my mom thinks I should have, I want the one my BF selected for me! Sigh.
 

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 3, 2004
Messages
32,049
HollyS|1307987921|2944824 said:
Uh, have you learned nothing here?

No. Don't. Get. Involved.

Not unless they ask. Then, by all means, impart knowledge.
i'm pretty sure they will.
 

Kaleigh

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 18, 2004
Messages
29,570
Ash would want me to be involved. It's not even a question.
 
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