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Selective when wearing big jewels?

PierreBear

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Good morning PS friends,

Do you ever come across a situation where you decide that your diamond/jewelry etc is too much of a statement for a given situation (going to church, attending a funeral, a modest engagement party...)? Or perhaps do you purposely not wear your rings to avoid judgement or attention? I find that a ring, especially given to you in an expression to commit to marriage, is such a pure and wonderful thing. However, I was wondering if your jewelry is larger than most (I don't have this issue, yet! ha!), if you would take it off and wear just a simple band?

Thanks in advance! Have a great day!
 

AGBF

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Back before Diamond Shrinkage Syndrome set in I found a diamond (which today is too small to be my ideal solitaire) too large to be my solitaire at all. I had decided to wear it as a ring, then couldn't do it and had it made into a necklace. I just felt too awkward with it on my hand. It was (and is) slightly over 2 carats. But I had never been comfortable with large stones. My original engagement ring is two 1-point stones inside an 18K gold oval that my husband bought me when we were young and poor. I didn't have a "real" diamond until I bought myself one in my 40's. A 1 carat ring was pretty big to me then. If I could afford the specs I wanted, I would now wear a 3-carat.

As to whether there are times I wouldn't wear my "everyday"ring: in my case this is not an issue.I only put it on for special occasions. lately the only jewelry I wear all the time is a pair of stud earrings.

AGBF
 

arkieb1

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Yes all the time, I don't wear the bling for every day situations like cleaning, feeding dogs, pottering in the garden and there are some general situations when you go out that it would probably be downright stupid and dangerous to be dripping in bling.
 

LadyMCh

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Heck yeah. I probably wear my new ring more places than I should b/c I love it so much. The center is the ~3.96 yellow OEC I inherited; with the setting, it's 5.25tcw and covers my whole size 4.25 finger. We take public transit sometimes or walk around "transitioning neighborhoods" in our metro area, so if I have it on, I flip it over to my palm so it looks like I just have 2 bands on or put my hand(s) in my pocket.
When I travel, I only wear a plain white gold wedding band. Depending on wear we are traveling to, I may wear some small diamond studs, too (0.80ctw and 0.30ctw). For example, I wore both sets of studs in Europe and Japan, but I didn't wear any to South America b/c one of our family members who lives there was mugged for her diamond hoops (they tackled her, held her down, and took the earrings right out of her ears!).
When I'm working, I either wear the plain wg band or my 2ctw 5-stone because I'm a nurse. Even the band gets lots of comments from coworkers and patients about being *huge*. Anything else would definitely be physically AND mentally in the way while trying to care for patients.
I live in a very yuppy dogs & strollers type neighborhood, so it's a pretty safe place to wear bling.

Aside from situations where personal safety/theft are a concern, I wear what I want. Sometimes people notice, sometimes they don't. I don't care one way or the other and am not trying to get them to notice. It's my jewelry and it's purpose is to be worn and enjoyed. If people want to judge or think it's too flashy, that's on them. I have friends and acquaintances who have commented on me having "expensive" bling (trust it is not by PS standards! lol), but they often have bigger houses, flashier cars, toys like boats, weeklong Disney vacations, etc. It's not like they're not spending money on luxuries, too...just different ones! We have a gala and a fancy wedding coming up in the next few months, and I will be as blingy as I can possibly be! For me! Sweetie Pie is definitely bigger than the bride's e-ring, but so what? It's going to be a huge and very fancy wedding; I doubt anyone will even notice my ring. If so, I have been in situations where people have commented on a ring or something I'm wearing while at an event to honor someone else. I simply say "thank you", then redirect the conversation back where it belongs.
 

distracts

Ideal_Rock
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Yes. While I do think my engagement ring is a symbol of my relationship, it's also reasonably expensive (less so than many here, less than most of my family's - who have upgraded over the years - and in line with most of my friends', but expensive to the "average" person) and I think there are situations in which it is tactful to not wear it. Like if I am volunteering with people who aren't well off, it seems flashy and braggy to wear my ring, you know?

But I also think I have less issue than some people may changing rings because I often wear different rings on that hand just because I feel like it, so it doesn't feel like any sort of sacrifice to just wear a plain band, or just my diamond band, or yellow gold stacking bands, or yellow gold stacking bands with my half carat diamond, or my montana sapphire solitaire, or whatever. Those are all options I choose sometimes just because I want to wear those rings, regardless of the circumstance.
 

PintoBean

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I had a bad experience with a bad boss once upon a time. I will NOT wear big bling to work, especially if I'm crying poverty and begging for a raise :dance: .

I also used to work with a lot of papers so having anything on my hands was a bit cumbersome.

Also, I have not worked for employers in my region for a few years now - as a remote employee, my employers and coworkers have been located everywhere, so I prefer to err on the side of caution and wear no bling so as not to be the one with overwhelming or underwhelming jewelry.
 

kenny

Super_Ideal_Rock
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I wouldn't know.
Mine is only 1.5 ct, and since it's an asscher only looks like 0.005 ct.

I need DF's massive honking Octavia.

screen_shot_2016-10-20_at_3.png
 

AprilBaby

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I don't wear mine when I'm out doing charity work. We have once a month where we do dental work on homeless people. It would seem rude to wear big diamonds so it's naked (finger) day.
 

jaysonsmom

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Mar 13, 2004
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3,141
I live and work in So. Cali where my 1.8ct solitaire is not really considered "big enough" to garner much notice. My pendant and studs are also modest sizes, so I tend to wear these pieces everywhere...work, gym, grocery store. However, when travel to other countries for work, I usually leave all diamonds at home. I wear business-y pieces, such as pearl studs, plain band, silver jewelry.
 

kenny

Super_Ideal_Rock
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jaysonsmom|1477005639|4089064 said:
I live and work in So. Cali where my 1.8ct solitaire is not really considered "big enough" to garner much notice.
So. Cali. varies! :whistle:

I'm also in So. Cali. but I've never seen a diamond over 1/4 ct in my supermarket, though there are tons of men and women each sporting multiple '5-ct' fakes. :bigsmile:
 

Dancing Fire

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kenny|1477002895|4089049 said:
I wouldn't know.
Mine is only 1.5 ct, and since it's an asscher only looks like 0.005 ct.

I need DF's massive honking Octavia.
Not massive enough at 7.4mm... ;(
 

anne_h

Brilliant_Rock
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Jun 13, 2005
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My jewelry is for my own enjoyment, so I wear whatever I want wherever I want. Sometimes I wear lots at once. Sometimes nothing at all. Depends on my outfit and other accessories and how I'm feeling!

If someone comments or expresses curiosity, then I'm very happy to share more about the piece, answer questions, etc.

Most people probably don't care, or can't tell real from fake, so I've never run into any problems.

Anne
 

Arcadian

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I wear what I want, when I want. Meaning not often :-o If I think about it, I wear stuff to dinner. My studs are always on, I take them off to clean but thats it. Being I have big hands, most of my stones 1.5ct+ range. Thankfully I don't do diamonds much, I'd be poor! The largest set for a ring I have is a 12ct citrine.
 

Tacori E-ring

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I work in the health and human services field so I do not wear flashy jewelry.
 

monarch64

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My diamond earring studs are on the larger side and I do not wear those to morning, conservative meetings. That's the end of it. Other than that, I wear whatever I like to noon + functions or meetings. Your engagement/wedding rings are gifts and imo why on earth would you feel odd about wearing them to any event?

PB I don't know how old you are, but girlll once you hit a certain age you're going to be like "IDGAF." Yup. It will happen. :dance: :appl:
 

Phoenix

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monarch64|1477026504|4089137 said:
My diamond earring studs are on the larger side and I do not wear those to morning, conservative meetings. That's the end of it. Other than that, I wear whatever I like to noon + functions or meetings. Your engagement/wedding rings are gifts and imo why on earth would you feel odd about wearing them to any event?

PB I don't know how old you are, but girlll once you hit a certain age you're going to be like "IDGAF." Yup. It will happen. :dance: :appl:
+1

Lol. I love this!
 

Trekkie

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Since getting my 1.2ct and seeing the attention it gets in my small university town here in South Africa I think my much coveted 8mm stone will have to wait until IDGAF age! :lol:

Over here nearly all diamond earrings are actually cz, half a carat is considered large, and even when you go to the "nice" jewellery store the largest size on display is around 0.3-0.4.

I don't care, I still wear what I want to wear - 0.51ct ering, 2x 0.56 point wedding bands, 1.2ct RHR, 0.88ct diamond earrings, ~1ct DBTY bracelet, 0.57ct diamond pendant and diamond watch. Pretty modest by PS standards, but pretty much a Christmas tree where I live.

I bought these things because I like them and want to enjoy them, and they're all insured, so why not enjoy them?
 

missy

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Phoenix|1477036151|4089175 said:
monarch64|1477026504|4089137 said:
My diamond earring studs are on the larger side and I do not wear those to morning, conservative meetings. That's the end of it. Other than that, I wear whatever I like to noon + functions or meetings. Your engagement/wedding rings are gifts and imo why on earth would you feel odd about wearing them to any event?

PB I don't know how old you are, but girlll once you hit a certain age you're going to be like "IDGAF." Yup. It will happen. :dance: :appl:
+1

Lol. I love this!
Yeah this is pretty much how I feel at this point in my life. The only reason I won't wear a big jewel (i.e. my Cartier black opal diamond halo ring) is for safety or comfort reasons. Otherwise I wear what I want when I want to and why should anyone else care? I wear my bling for me.
 

soxfan

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My first ring was a 2 ct in a VC emilya. It was too big to wear to work (I am a teacher.) So I got a .93 OEC (that faces up like a .80) That is the ring I wear to work. It DOES have a CVB casablanca halo around it, but it's still not a huge ring by any stretch. I wear it with a dainty engraved band every day for work.

My 1.6 ct antique pear halo ring is very large. I wear that out to dinner and out for special events or occasions, as it's the biggest ring I own. It's a stunner! :love:

I recently got a 2.28 ct OEC. At 8.5 mm, it's the perfect size for me. And being in a solitaire makes it more wearable- with jeans or out for special occasions. This ring I would wear to work, shopping, or out for dinner or a special occasion.

Diamond size varies around here. I would say the majority have between .5 to a 1 carat stone. Some have smaller, a few have larger. I don't really care, I wear what I want...
 

OoohShiny

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Trekkie|1477041212|4089183 said:
Since getting my 1.2ct and seeing the attention it gets in my small university town here in South Africa I think my much coveted 8mm stone will have to wait until IDGAF age! :lol:

Over here nearly all diamond earrings are actually cz, half a carat is considered large, and even when you go to the "nice" jewellery store the largest size on display is around 0.3-0.4.

I don't care, I still wear what I want to wear - 0.51ct ering, 2x 0.56 point wedding bands, 1.2ct RHR, 0.88ct diamond earrings, ~1ct DBTY bracelet, 0.57ct diamond pendant and diamond watch. Pretty modest by PS standards, but pretty much a Christmas tree where I live.

I bought these things because I like them and want to enjoy them, and they're all insured, so why not enjoy them?
Given the violence and crime that I hear about, which appears to be endemic in SA, I don't even want to visit there as a tourist, nevermind rock a large number of expensive diamonds! :shock:

My perception may well be wrong (after all, newspapers and journalists would never lie to make a story better... :roll: :lol: ) but there are a lot of anecdotal horror stories out there...
 

Winks_Elf

Brilliant_Rock
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I live in NJ, and where I grew up my 1.27ct would be looked down upon for being small. It was pretty much the norm in our circles that your engagement ring be a minimum 1.5ct, and if it wasn't, the guys would be talked about as if they were paupers (mostly by my older female relatives..."Whatssamatta, he can't afford a wife and a proper ring??? How's he gonna take carea you if he can't even get you a good ring?!" Very old school NJ Italian). Out here where we live in the mountains of the northwest side of NJ (land of no shopping malls, and land that the Bergen County crew don't even think exists), my carat 27 is seen as substantial, especially when I wear the vintage insert guard ring with it. It's all about perspective.
 

PierreBear

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monarch64|1477026504|4089137 said:
My diamond earring studs are on the larger side and I do not wear those to morning, conservative meetings. That's the end of it. Other than that, I wear whatever I like to noon + functions or meetings. Your engagement/wedding rings are gifts and imo why on earth would you feel odd about wearing them to any event?

PB I don't know how old you are, but girlll once you hit a certain age you're going to be like "IDGAF." Yup. It will happen. :dance: :appl:
haha! Yes, I'm in my 30s and I know part of me is starting to develop that mentality. However, I was more thinking that if in the event I do get an upgrade one day, it will be probably larger than my social network of friends. I wonder if I will only wear it on special occasions? It seems like the nicer/expensive/beautiful item should be worn as much as possible to get the most out of it! My husband laughs at me that when I got my first luxury purse (nothing too fancy but branded), I didn't bring it all the time to the work/church/certain events. He wanted me to be more confident about using it as the $/day used would decrease if that makes sense. Anyhow, thanks to all for sharing!
 

Calliecake

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Phoenix|1477036151|4089175 said:
monarch64|1477026504|4089137 said:
My diamond earring studs are on the larger side and I do not wear those to morning, conservative meetings. That's the end of it. Other than that, I wear whatever I like to noon + functions or meetings. Your engagement/wedding rings are gifts and imo why on earth would you feel odd about wearing them to any event?

PB I don't know how old you are, but girlll once you hit a certain age you're going to be like "IDGAF." Yup. It will happen. :dance: :appl:
+1

Lol. I love this!
+1,000!!!!!

Only peole who love jewelry notice. No one else gives jewelry a second thought.
 

purplesparklies

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Calliecake said:
+1,000!!!!!

Only peole who love jewelry notice. No one else gives jewelry a second thought.
I don't choose not to wear my more expensive pieces, none of which fall into the category of expensive compared to the majority shared on PS, because I am concerned about what people will think of me. I wear what I like. However, I am aware of situations I may encounter and choose accordingly. I spend time in food pantries, shelters, etc. and those are often in depressed areas. Jewelry worn in those areas is not noticed by jewelry lovers so much as it is noticed by those looking for an easy target. In those instances, I prefer to dress and act in such a way that I appear to be neither an easy nor a rewarding target.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

redwood66

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monarch64|1477026504|4089137 said:
PB I don't know how old you are, but girlll once you hit a certain age you're going to be like "IDGAF." Yup. It will happen. :dance: :appl:

+1001

:lol: :lol:
 

dk168

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I adjust my jewellery based on dress code for an event/occasion/surroundings, and not people.

I do not wear my bigger/nicer pieces to work as I consider them too dressy to be worn with a polo shirt of an uniform. And I work in an controlled environment where I need to wear gloves for significant periods of time.

If the dress code for an event is smart/formal, then the blings come out, and I would wear what I see fit with my outfit, regardless who will attend the event.

I worked hard to be where I am professionally and financially. I will admit to having a serious bling habit, however, it is my hard earned money and I shall spend it as I see fit. And jewellery is for wearing and not for sitting in a box gathering dust.

I would like to believe I am not one of those whom I would consider as "show offs", except to talk about my latest acquisitions and projects on the 3 message boards that I frequent, as in amongst like-minded enthusiasts.


DK :))
 

Scandinavian

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Diamond Shrinkage Syndrome is a wonderful thing! I don't own any jewels that are too big for anything :D :lol:
 

missy

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Scandinavian|1477309643|4089945 said:
Diamond Shrinkage Syndrome is a wonderful thing! I don't own any jewels that are too big for anything :D :lol:

Hahaha true dat NIRDI sister. :lol: :appl:
 

ame

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As most on here know, I almost never wear my rings for reasons of insanity. But IF I wear anything to work at this particular job, it's a plain band because of the comments many make (not coworkers but those who we work with) about "who paid for it" or "how much are they paying you here". Not to mention the fact that it's gone super downhill in this neighborhood in terms of crime, despite the fact that cops hang out in the restaurant in our lobby, and the police HQ in the city is actually 2 blocks away, and their pension and union offices are in the same lot as our offices. Two of my coworkers were robbed walking to the parking lot and one of my bosses was robbed at gunpoint not two months later. ALL THREE with police just 20 feet away, just without view of the incidents. I park where if that happened it would be ridiculously obvious (they don't), but I feel like why invite it? I downsized my purse and wallet, I don't wear any of my jewelry. I just don't invite any attention whenever possible.
 
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