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Secret stash...Do you have money stashed away from your SO?

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Do you think your SO have a secret stash that you don't know of? :bigsmile:
 

dk168

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No, as I don't have a SO, and when I did, we had separate bank accounts.

I do not believe in having joint accounts, and strongly believe in being financially independent without being supported by a SO.

Incidences at home when I was growing up taught me the virtues of being financially independent as a woman.

I like the idea of whatever is mine is mine, whatever is his is ours. However, I have yet to put that into practice, and it is highly unlikely that I will as I am in the stage when I CBA to kiss anymore frogs to find a prince. :lol-2:

DK :))
 

Dandi

Ideal_Rock
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We have joint accounts for bills, loan repayments etc, but each have a separate savings accout/splurge fund that neither of us care what the other does with it.
 

Austina

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I don’t need to @Dancing Fire, I know he’s not hiding anything from me. After 43 years together, we have no secrets, and I trust him implicitly.
 

Made in London

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I still save up to buy my own sparkleys from money I earn. The rest goes into a joint bank account to pay bills & for savings etc
 

maryjane04

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We have joint loans and accounts and separate splurge accounts.

I have also found a stash of cash in random places around the house. Underwear drawer, under the bathroom vanity, in the toolbox, in a book.. I've just pretended not to see it haha those are the ones I've found so I'm wondering what other places I haven't looked.
 

missy

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No. Everything we have is jointly owned that can be jointly owned and what cannot be is in each other's name as beneficiary.

We have no secrets from each other. Our respect for each other is strong and IMO, keeping secrets would be disrespectful. For us. I cannot speak to other relationships and how they work. This is what works for us.

I love my dh more than life itself and he loves me the same way. Not judging anyone else's relationship. This is what works for us. Completely above board and honest. Open communication always.

Money can be a downfall to some people's relationship and keeping secrets another potential pitfall in a relationship. If I want to buy something pricey I discuss it with my DH and then I get it and vice versa. Neither of us holds the purse strings so to speak. If we want something we talk about it and then we get it.

We trust each other and do not hide things from one another.
We support each other.
We are equals in our relationship.
We respect each other.
We trust each other.
We balance each other out.
We are there for each other no matter what.
Kindness, respect, trust and passion and keeping no secrets is the highest form of intimacy.
IMO.


honesty.jpg
 

chrono

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Apr 22, 2004
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I don't consider it hiding and neither does he. We just don't care to know how much money we have in our independent accounts. As for the joint, we both are always aware of how much it has and how it is spent.
 

vintageinjune

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Nah, he isn't hiding money anywhere I don't know about.

Am I hiding money from him? Also no, but I have thought about it! Specifically, I have considered opening a savings account that I can stash away a little here and there with the intent to surprise him about being able to go on a vacation or enough to pay off that last student loan in full, but ultimately decided against it because we don't keep anything from each other (long term, sometimes I might need a day or two to collect my thoughts, but if something needs to be discusssed we know about it but acknowledge it is a "later" issue).
 

Lisa Loves Shiny

Ideal_Rock
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No.
 

HS4S_2

Brilliant_Rock
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My husband and I have everything 50/50. We consult with each other before a big purchase or decision. I absolutely trust him 100 percent that he is not hiding anything from me. We have be married more than half of our lives so we literally grew up together as we started our relationship right after we DH turned 20.

We know family members who keep things seperate. My FIL still to this day encourages hiding assets because he had a ugly divorce and never "approved" of me because I am American versus French. However, we are best friends and how we do it works for us. I love him completely and trust him completely.

I think everyone has to do what works for them. We all have our own ways of doing things and comfort levels. My sister keeps everything seperate because she had a bad divorce previously. Though she does it differently than I do....it works for her.
 

lovedogs

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We have joint accounts for bills, loan repayments etc, but each have a separate savings accout/splurge fund that neither of us care what the other does with it.

We have the exact same. Joint account for all joint things, and separate accounts for "fun stuff", savings, etc.
 

marymm

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We each have our own separate "secret" stash of cash at the house -- we know we each have a cash stash, but we don't keep track of how much it may be from day to day -- we also know the locations of both stashes, so we have access to both in case of a real emergency.

Our bank accounts are separate but we keep current with bank balances and expenditures, and we talk & agree on large purchases.
 

tyty333

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I dont think he does but wouldn't matter if he did. I have some "mad" money in my closet. He knows about it just because
I don't want him to accidentally throw it out if I get knocked off or something! Now, if he were hiding say over $10k I would
probably have something to say about that like where is my $10k for "fun" money.:lol:
 

Trekkie

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Apr 21, 2010
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1,331
Yes, I do

It’s my knipple, and it’s helped me out of trouble on more than one occasion. (Leaving my first husband, getting back on my feet after rehab).

DH kind of knows about it, but not the specifics. I think he’d be surprised if he knew how much it is.

I don’t know if he has a secret stash, but I wouldn’t be bothered if he did.
 

jaysonsmom

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Mar 13, 2004
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4,879
We have a joint account which we put in money to for household bills, but we also have separate checking, savings and trading accounts that the other person knows about which we manage on our own.
 

Dancing Fire

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Yes, I do

It’s my knipple, and it’s helped me out of trouble on more than one occasion. (Leaving my first husband, getting back on my feet after rehab).
Yep, that's the reason why I think most women do have a secret stash somewhere.
 

MamaBee

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Sprinkles&Stones

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Hahahahahahahahahaha

my DH couldn’t find his way out of a wet paper bag. He can’t find something when it’s RIGHT IN FRONT of him. He couldn’t find anything in our home with a guide dog and Google map directions.
If he “hid” something, he’d never find it again (bless his heart).

wouldn’t THAT Be funny! “Hey dear, I hid some money from you in the house years ago and I can’t find it. Can you find it for me?”
hahahahahahah
 
Joined
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My SO and I aren’t married, but we have an understanding for when we do - any money we earned until we get married, plus the money left over after we contribute our joint expenses, savings and investments, plus any gifts/inheritances etc are ours to do with as we please, and the other need not know. However, we do plan to make a list of all accounts/investments etc, and make a will, and make sure that the other person is aware what accounts are there (even if not the balances and without any power to operate said accounts when the owner of the account is alive and not incapacitated) so that if the worst happens as next of kin we can take care of any affairs.
 
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