anchor31
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Oct 18, 2005
- Messages
- 7,074
So I talked to my mom tonight at dinner. I didn''t quite know how to break the ice, so I asked her how it happened when she and my dad decided to get engaged and married 31½ years ago. She told me, then asked why I wanted to know. So I told her everything. How we''ve been talking about this for a while, that he''ll be proposing before the New Year, that we went ring shopping last weekend and are hoping to have it made, and that we''re thinking about getting married when I graduate.
She reacted soooo much better than I feared she would... She got that "mothers-know-everything" look and said she''d been expecting it. We had a tough patch in our relationship a little over a year ago, but since we cleared that up, things have been going so well we can''t imagine not having each other in our lives. She said she''s seen us through our ups and downs in the last three years we''ve know each other, and sees how much our relationship helps us learn and become better persons and how happy we make each other. She said that as long as we accept each other with our faults and know that marrying each other won''t change those faults, she is happy for us. She''s very relieved that we''re waiting until I graduate because she knows it would be harder for me without their financial support and she wants what''s best for me, but I feel that she wouldn''t have stopped us if we decided to marry next year or something. Even though my mother married young and rather quickly (1 year of dating, 9 months engagement and she was 19) and left school to marry my dad, I was a little worried she''d give me the "why rush" speech. But I think she remembers what it''s like and she understands. She said she doesn''t really understand long engagement (not to judge us, just to give her opinion) and I explained to her we were planning on a two-year engagement, but my decision to transfer delays my graduation for another year and we decided to not change our engagement plans.
We talked a little about rings and weddings. She said that if we wanted an 80 guests wedding, we could do one, which is a big relief for me. She said that something we can do is invite immediate family and close friends to the ceremony and dinner, and extend the invitations to more people for the party after the seated dinner. Has anyone heard of/done this? It seems a little wierd to me, but I have a lot of time to worry about that!
I just want a small wedding, and even though I love the idea, it''d make me sad to hurt my family if we eloped.
I also told her J intends to ask for her and dad''s blessing and I wanted to talk to them first so it didn''t come as too much of a shock. She was a bit surprised and said she''ll talk to my dad. I''m wondering if she just did!!
Thanks for your support everyone!! And yes, I''ll keep you posted on the ring progress...
She reacted soooo much better than I feared she would... She got that "mothers-know-everything" look and said she''d been expecting it. We had a tough patch in our relationship a little over a year ago, but since we cleared that up, things have been going so well we can''t imagine not having each other in our lives. She said she''s seen us through our ups and downs in the last three years we''ve know each other, and sees how much our relationship helps us learn and become better persons and how happy we make each other. She said that as long as we accept each other with our faults and know that marrying each other won''t change those faults, she is happy for us. She''s very relieved that we''re waiting until I graduate because she knows it would be harder for me without their financial support and she wants what''s best for me, but I feel that she wouldn''t have stopped us if we decided to marry next year or something. Even though my mother married young and rather quickly (1 year of dating, 9 months engagement and she was 19) and left school to marry my dad, I was a little worried she''d give me the "why rush" speech. But I think she remembers what it''s like and she understands. She said she doesn''t really understand long engagement (not to judge us, just to give her opinion) and I explained to her we were planning on a two-year engagement, but my decision to transfer delays my graduation for another year and we decided to not change our engagement plans.
We talked a little about rings and weddings. She said that if we wanted an 80 guests wedding, we could do one, which is a big relief for me. She said that something we can do is invite immediate family and close friends to the ceremony and dinner, and extend the invitations to more people for the party after the seated dinner. Has anyone heard of/done this? It seems a little wierd to me, but I have a lot of time to worry about that!

I also told her J intends to ask for her and dad''s blessing and I wanted to talk to them first so it didn''t come as too much of a shock. She was a bit surprised and said she''ll talk to my dad. I''m wondering if she just did!!
Thanks for your support everyone!! And yes, I''ll keep you posted on the ring progress...
