reading too much into bridesmaid behavior?

[Smurfysmiles]

So my bridesmaid was looking at our registry and she''s like wow you have a lot of stuff on there and I told her how they told us to register for twice the guests we had. Anyways she''s asking all these questions because she was just curious (I''m the first in our group getting married) and she said something like well nobody will probably buy anything til about august then huh? And I said well maybe, we''re having the shower in July most likely which she followed up with "what when" and I was like well fi''s aunts are throwing it and she''s like we have to buy you presents for that? And I said no you don''t have to, and the people who do bring something will bring something 10 dollars or under because that''s how they''ve done it in the past...and she basically was like ok whatever. her birthday is 2 days before the shower, do you think she is mad that it is so close to her birthday? She doesn''t have to travel, it''s where she lives now. her dog did just die a couple days ago so that is why i''m not reading much into it but it seems like she is almost mad about it? and she''s the one who called me to talk about it...i guess i''m just a little confused right now...

 

[Italiahaircolor]

She sounds more curious than judgemental...I''d cut her some slack.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

alright, i was little confused

 

[Inanna]

Yeah, she just sounds curious to me. Is this her first time as a bridesmaid?

I''ve been a bridesmaid several times and I''m still a bit confused about how wedding events are "typically" planned, what "most" people do, or what is "expected" of bridesmaids. Her curiosity/confusion sounds very natural to me... she''s just trying to figure it all out. I will admit I''ve never been a bridesmaid without feeling at least some frustration - whether its the amount of money that I felt I needed to put forth, or the sometimes seemingly endless number of events. Nevertheless, I''ve gotten a HUGE amount of lasting pleasure from being a part of my friends weddings (no regrets whatsoever) and in the end, any amount of frustration I *momentarily* felt really doesn''t matter at all to me today.

 

[Haven]

It sounds like you might be digging for some drama, here. I''d give her the benefit of the doubt, she just sounds curious.

 

[Clairitek]

Date: 3/18/2009 11:59:41 PM
Author: Haven
It sounds like you might be digging for some drama, here. I''d give her the benefit of the doubt, she just sounds curious.

I''m with Haven on this one. I totally think its purely innocent.

 

[kittybean]

Date: 3/19/2009 12:14:54 AM
Author: Clairitek

Date: 3/18/2009 11:59:41 PM

Author: Haven

It sounds like you might be digging for some drama, here. I''d give her the benefit of the doubt, she just sounds curious.

I''m with Haven on this one. I totally think its purely innocent.

+1

 

[meresal]

Date: 3/18/2009 10:23:20 PM
Author: Italiahaircolor
She sounds more curious than judgemental...I''d cut her some slack.

Ditto, sounds like she is just curious about how things work.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

thanks for all the input guys, i really appreciate it
sometimes you need things pointed out to ya even though theyre standing right in front of your face lol

 

[purrfectpear]

Like you said, you''re the first in the group to get married. She doesn''t have any idea how the whole wedding planning thing works

 

[bee*]

I agree with the others-I''d say that shes just curious.

 

[musey]

Date: 3/18/2009 11:59:41 PM
Author: Haven
It sounds like you might be digging for some drama, here. I''d give her the benefit of the doubt, she just sounds curious.

That was my first thought, as well

be happy with the non-drama in your life... you don''t want any (more), I promise!

 

[AmberGretchen]

Yeah, I would definitely not read too much into it. If my dog (or any pet, for that matter) had just died, I would not be excited or happy about much of ANYTHING.

 

[tlh]

smurfy, is this the same bridesmaid that wanted to have a birthday party- and you had to schedule the shower around HER????? She could just have issues.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

yeah its the same one lol

 

[teapot]

Your friend probably doesn''t know what her role is and what she is supposed to do. Unless she has been around the wedding planning process, she probably doesn''t understand all of the expectation.