Question about Thank You's

[merbear1215]

Hi Ladies,

Our wedding is at the end of October. However, we have started receiving gifts already (shipped to my parents house). One was from a couple who can not attend, the others were from people who will be at the wedding.

Anyway, I was trying to figure out what to do about the thank you's. I would feel a little strange opening the gifts and sending the thank you's so far before the wedding. I have even heard you should not use the gifts until after the shower/wedding. However, I also don't want the gift givers to think that I have their present and just did not bother to send a thank you.

The one thing I was thinking was I would open them, write the thank you's, but not mail them until after the wedding. What did you ladies do?

 

[CurlySue]

I have been writing and sending TY notes them as we get gifts, mainly b/c I want to acknowledge that the gifts arrived. Not sure what etiquette dictates, though.

 

[S&I]

I don't know if this is right or wrong, but I've been writing and sending out Thank You cards shortly after receiving gifts. So far, we've only gotten a few gifts shipped to the house, so it's not a huge deal. I figured, the more I write now, the less I'll have to write after the wedding.

But I am curious as to what others have been doing too!

 

[lucyandroger]

I plan to send the thank-you's as the gifts arrive so guests know that I've received them.

I think the superstition is about not using the gifts before the wedding as opposed to not opening the gifts. It's sort of a "don't count your chickens before they hatch" type of thing because there's a chance the wedding could not happen and then you'd have to return the gifts.

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

You should open and acknowledge the gift when you receive it. Don't wait until after the wedding. People want to know that their gifts were received.

 

[amc80]

"While you have up to 3 months to send a socially acceptable "Thank You" note for a wedding gift, it is best to get them out within 2 weeks of returning from the honeymoon. Any gifts received before the wedding should be acknowledged promptly before the wedding. In this situation, a bride should use her maiden name on the note."

Source: http://hubpages.com/hub/Wedding-Thank-You-Etiquette

I looked at several etiquette sites and they all said the same thing- send thank yous as you receive them. Interesting, I would have thought to wait until after the wedding.

 

[merbear1215]

wonderful!! thank you for the info! I will got on that this weekend

 

[AustenNut]

On a related note, what if the company tells you something has been purchased, but is on backorder. Do you send a thank you note now, or do you wait until it arrives?

 

[kelpie]

I have been getting checks with some of the decline RSVPs and I've cashed them promptly and sent a thankyou the day they are cashed. I'm not using my normal thank yous because they say Jane and John Doe on them which we aren't yet.