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Question about ring selection

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vanman1013

Rough_Rock
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Sep 4, 2006
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Ok, so I''m in the hunt for a diamond
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/i-need-help.50411/

But now I''m also starting to look for a ring. My g/f is studying abroad (in Budapest) and I''m going to see her in October. I''m going to try and make it a surprise (at least the best that I can). I''ve talked to her sister, 2 of her best friends and now this board. I have no idea what style to get. Her sister says something unique and big, one of her friends says simple and classic the other friend says big diamond, fancy ring. Basically they all say something almost completely differnet. So my question ends up being can I go wrong with a solitaire ring? It''s elegant, classic and I like it. Is there something else I should be looking for?

Thanks in avance,
Newbie looking to get married


PS- I think of her liking simple and basic, more then something big and flashy.
 
I''m still of the mind that you surprise her with the perfect (for your budget) stone in the cheapest plainest setting you can find and then let her pick her own ring or choose them together or design it together... if you do a good job on the stone she doesn''t really have to be there, but the styles of ring she might want input...
 
this makes sense. So a solitaire would be good. Then, slightly differnet question, would splitting the new ring be tacky? We are young and slightly broke, I''ve heard people talk about the guy gets the engagement ring the girl gets the band, or the guy gets the diamond and a cheap ring (like I may be doing) and then split the new engagement ring and the two bands and get them all to match. I know very little about all of this stuff and I appreciate the answering of really stupid questions.


Thanks
 
It''s really up to the couple how they chose to pay for the ring. I think, traditionally, that the guy pays for the engagement ring and her wedding band while she pays for his wedding band.

For us, he bought:
my antique engagement ring
one of my wedding bands (the titanium one)

I bought:
his engagement ring
minor repairs on my e-ring
his wedding band
my other wedding band (the platinum & diamond one)

It''d be a good idea to discuss now what each of you plans to pay for as far as the wedding expenses, including the wedding rings. I personally would perfer if the guy, after buying the inexpensive setting, left enough money for me to upgrade the setting without having to spend a lot myself. That way he can say, "I wanted you to pick your own setting so I got an inexpensive one. I have $XXX left over for the purchase of the new setting." If she wants anything above and beyond that, she can pay for it.
 
Can I jump in here? My boyfriend and I have decided to split the cost of the e-ring and our respective wedding rings. I actually appreciate the fact that he will let me pay (I had to fight him for this right early on in our relationship...:)) because then I feel like I have equal footing financially. Plus, I''m more inclined to get *exactly* what I want for my wedding set, because I''m shouldering half the financial burden. Besides, after we get married, our incomes will be combined anyway, and it won''t matter who paid for what.

That said, I think it depends on the dynamic of your relationship. Just make sure your actions are in line with the context of the relationship as a whole.
 
I think what I may do, is put it in a solitaire setting, and then talk to her about what we should do from there. More then likely she will want to pick out her own setting (but hopefully she will just love the solitaire so much she won''t want to) and we can work something out, this sounds like the best way of doing it. If anyone else has any other ideas, please feel free, the more info. i get the better off I''ll be I''m sure.
 
I think the engagement ring is generally considered a gift, and so most of the time is purchased by the giver. But only you and your intended know what your situation is, what your ego and wallet can handle, and what you are comfortable doing.

I certainly didn't feel financially insecure at all when my DH presented me with a ring he had purchased, and I had not contributed to. But some people are very squeamish when it comes to gifts and cannot accept them easily. I'm glad I do, because I love gifts!!
1.gif


My sister bought her ring for herself because she married a.....how shall we say....a frugal man, and he would never have bought her what she wanted (~0.5 carat in platinum solitaire), so it worked out for them that she made the purchase.

For my taste, a solitaire is gorgeous and timeless. I would not consider that a "cheap" ring at all, and most consider it an elegant choice. It is, of course, lower priced than a setting with more stones/gems, so you can save some money with a solitaire. But don't think for an instant that it's a lesser ring; your intended may want a solitaire setting, and you should be proud to present it to her.

Also, my recommendation is not to get a totally cheap solitaire. Shoddy work is not fun to wear, and you get what you pay for. Even though solitaires are simple in design, you can see the differences in a well-made one vs. poor metal working and bad esthetics/proportions/design. Especially if you view your girlfriend as a classic lover, she will appreciate a high quality setting for a ring she will likely wear for many years.
 
I think it''s really up to the couple to decide how to pay for their rings. However, here''s something to think about. If you are planning on sharing money after marriage, in the long run it really won''t matter who pays for what.
 
I think you are right about the solitaire, I''m going to look for one that will be pretty and well made. I''m thinking somewhere between a .5-.8 f-i diamond and eye clean. This seems like it makes the most sense for me at this time. It''ll be simple, yet well meaning and I''m pretty sure I will get no complaints.
 
anyone know anything about A. Jaffe? I was looking at their site and there are no prices, which means they are probably out of my range, but they have beautiful stuff. Any opinions on quality/price?
 
Date: 9/5/2006 9:51:57 PM
Author: vanman1013
anyone know anything about A. Jaffe? I was looking at their site and there are no prices, which means they are probably out of my range, but they have beautiful stuff. Any opinions on quality/price?
Click to expand...

Here's a jeweler's webpage that sells A. Jaffe showing what they charge. Seems somewhat higher than you might pay for a non-designer soliaire setting. You may find different pricing somewhere else, but it gives you an idea:

Pearlman's Jewelers
 
Thanks, that''s exactly what I was looking for.
 
If you are not sure of her exact taste beyond the general stuff, I would advise put the money into the stone and a lovely well made simple setting. If you are opposed to ever upgrading the stone in the future, she could always tweak the setting, keeping the original nice stone. I also think that I prefered having some input, but being surprised and also not paying for part of it, though the point is moot because I was a non working student when we got engaged. You know her, if you are getting input that is all over the place, stick with something easy and I am sure she will love it!
 
We too are both poor students, so the upgrade would come much later. This is why I think something simple makes the most sense. Plus she seems to me (and I''m pretty sure I know her pretty well) to like simple jewlery, nothing flashy. This is why I know a smaller stone is good and I''m hoping that a simple e-ring would be good and a slightly more extravegant wedding band. This is what I''m thinking, but I''m going to keep looking. I''ve done very little research thus far (I just started yesterday) so I may find that I like something else, we''ll see.
 
what do you think? too small? too cheap? what do you think?

.44
G
VS2
ideal cut (GIA)
depth: 61.6%
table: 55.0%
flourence: faint
girdle: medium, slightly thick
LxWxH: 4.9 x 4.94 x 3.03


on an 18k white gold solitaire


it''s on diamond.com in the create your own the total $1,191.50
 
Date: 9/6/2006 6:18:23 AM
Author: vanman1013
what do you think? too small? too cheap? what do you think?

.44
G
VS2
ideal cut (GIA)
depth: 61.6%
table: 55.0%
flourence: faint
girdle: medium, slightly thick
LxWxH: 4.9 x 4.94 x 3.03


on an 18k white gold solitaire


it''s on diamond.com in the create your own the total $1,191.50
Click to expand...
Need more info, the crown and pavillion angles to determine the cut. Also you could drop your colour and clarity a bit if you wanted to, just a thought..
 
it doesn''t give that information. how much lower would you go?
 
Ellen-

Would that diamond work for a solitaire? Specifically the $210 one on that site (white gold, tiffany-style, 4 prong)?
 
the Tiff solitaire starts at .20 cts
 
Date: 9/6/2006 3:22:41 PM
Author: JulieN
the Tiff solitaire starts at .20 cts
Click to expand...
There''s your answer!
 
Is .2 too small for that diamond
 
I'd probably go for 1/3 of a carat if you can afford it, but if you can't, that's ok! No engagement ring can be "too small."
 
you said the tiffany ring starts at .2. What does that mean? that i should go w/ a smaller diamond?
 
The smallest stock head that goes with that ring is made for a stone that is .2 cts. So anything above that is fine.
 
ok. i''m thinking the 1/2 carat that was posted on here sounds good. thanks for the help
 
Well, I got some good news today. I was telling my parents of my plan to propose and my parents were thrilled. And the good news about all of this is they say they will help pay for the ring. I''m not exactly sure how much they were going to help, but now I''m interested in what I should do. I''m looking for about 1/2 carat still and probably a pretty good quality (G vs1/2, etc). A couple of questions how much is the Tiffany''s Setting with a 1/2 carat size diamond? Do they sell that small? Is Tiffany''s worth the investment? I think my g/f would like it, but by no means would she be upset with any ring really. Any advice would be appreciated.
 
If you mean an actual ring from the jewelry store names Tiffany''s, yes, you''ll pay about double what you''ll pay elsewhere. In other words, you''ll get a much smaller diamond for your budget!

So when we say to get a simple tiffany setting, we mean a simple band with 4 or 6 prongs, not a ring from Tiffany''s.

I think it is terrific your parents are excited for you and want to help you pay for the ring! What is your budget now? We''ll try and help you find some nice stones around G VS1 or VS2. I think that is an excellent choice!
 
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