Preschool for kids (need advice)

[MichelleCarmen]

Hi everyone,

I need opinions of day care issues my husband and I are currently encountering.

Both of my kids (boys - ages 3 and nearly 5) have been attending the same day care for about 1.4 years. The reason I picked this school is because it''s located out in the woods, it''s quiet and it''s privatetly owned. The school has about 50 kids and there are about 15-20 kids in the section my kids are in. My kids love their friends and seem happy with the school, but of course would rather stay home.

The problem with the school is the diet. The children there are feed nothing but crap. Every snack is cake or candy and lunch is poor quality white bread and junk juice, etc. The owner and her daughter have FOUR brand new luxury automobiles (lexus, bmw, excursion, and a nice extended cab truck) so I''m feeling more and more fed up with how they allocate the funds entering/exciting the day care.

Many of the teachers at the school have commented on my three year olds tendency to shake after waking up. My MIL and I both wondered if my son may be hypoglycemic as we noticed this too. I complained to the day care owner about the amount of sugar she''s feeding the boys, and instead of saying she''d work w/me, she avoided me for a couple of weeks.

Yesterday at my MILs house, we decided to find out exactly what my son''s blood sugars are doing and we tested him with a home meter after he ate some popcorn. He was low. I wasn''t surprised.

Soooo, . . .my husband is uncertain what to do. He feels it''s best to keep the boys in a stable environment - and this is the main reason we haven''t moved the boys out over these past six months, during which we''ve became more and more angered over the diet - but, now we''re just not sure what to do.

We will cut back on hours. . .but do you think that one day of bad diet a week is worse than putting the kids in a whole new environment? I''m thinking of doing montesorri or something along this line, where organic foods are fed, but my husband is concerned about changing them. . .

Any advice? Thanks!

 

[Kaleigh]

Michelle,
What about packing their snacks, lunches etc... That way you can make sure they are eating healthy foods???

 

[MichelleCarmen]

This idea crossed my mind, but I don''t think this will work. There are parties every d*mn week at the school, so cake or cupcakes are being served, even if one of the teachers is having a birthday! My kids would flip if they were left out. I just don''t know if home brought healthy food could compete and I think that the the teachers would give in to my kids'' tantrums basically to shut them up.

There was an article about this in the paper that day cares feed sugar to kids because it''s easier than coercing them into eating whole grain bread with peanut butter.

 

[yellowfan]

the diet is the big problem with daycares. I would look into changing to Montesorri. You could take your boys for visits to get them use to the idea. Daycares feed "crap" food because of the big discount of buying it in bulk. If you packed their lunches they would probably want what the other children are having....Sorry to hear of your problem, I hope your boys are doing good!

 

[Jennifer5973]

What I can offer is that I loved montesorri school when i was a kid (I went there for several years before the school closed and I was switched to Catholic school).

Also, kids are resilient... it gets tougher to change schools as you get older. If you evaluate all the aspects--diet, curriculum, faculty, etc. and switching seems like good idea overall , then there is a strong likelihood that they will adapt quickly.

 

[ammayernyc]

I don''t have children, and I''m sorry to hijack the thread but I''m curious... what''s a Montessori school?

 

[AndyRosse]

I would say change the school, because I have seen first hand how such poor diets affect children. My god-daughter''s daycare provider would always feed them sugar, sugar, sugar. My god-daughter would literally bounce off walls when she came home, and of course did not want to eat any healthy food at home. Not to mention that her behavior went down the drain. But once she left the daycare center and went into full day kindergarten, eating healtier foods, her behavior became more stable. She definitely is doing much better away from all that junk food.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 9/12/2005 1:52:16 PM
Author: Jennifer5973
Also, kids are resilient... it gets tougher to change schools as you get older. If you evaluate all the aspects--diet, curriculum, faculty, etc. and switching seems like good idea overall , then there is a strong likelihood that they will adapt quickly.

My kids will have to switch soon anyway. My old son starts kindergarden in one year, so if we switch him now, unless we do montesorri - a school nearby that has classes for 3-18 year olds - he'll have to start up a new school again after (if we do) this day care switch.

I'm totally confused. . .and my kids ARE bouncing off the walls when they get home. A week ago, the DC gave them a bag of candy each which they gorged on before coming home, and they both FLIPPED OUT and yanked all my plants out of their pots. My entire white carpet was showered with dirt and all my chinese evergreens and draceanas that I replanted are now dying

I'm glad I have here to vent because this is totally pissing me off! My husband wants to think more and also wants me to check the price of the school I'm looking into because the kids are mostly in day care for socialization and because they're too much for me full time by myself. I only work a few flexible hours, so it's ridiculous to spend thousands a month on specialized day care. We already pay $1,000 per month for part time and look what little this gets!

 

[MINE!!]

1st... is your state monitored by USDA? Are they certified by the state? I know that Va and a few others are. Therefore they have to adhere to a guideline for foods. But that could stir up a hornets nest if you find out that they are supposed to and confront them on it.

2nd... I think that someone mentioned sugar causes a child to be hyper. This is a myth.. from what I was taught at USDA too much sugar is indeed BAD for a child. But sugar does not make a child hyper.. it is one of those old wives tales. it is the caffine in chocolate and soda that makes a child hyper. If your kid bounces off the walls after eating a lolly pop... then that is cause your child normaly does... or because it is a learned reaction... i.e. they think they are supposed to act hyper after candy... but shaking after naps.. that could be anything... or it could have something to do with the sugar. Children definitely are able to focus and feel better on a balanced diet.

3rd. .. I agree that children are resilient. very much so. And montesorri is a good one. Both my kids went to Mont. and I LOVED it! So did they. You just have to make sure that you have a good one in your area..

DEMAND that this woman talk and work with you. these are your children and it should be demanded! That is your right and responsibility as a parent. And if they have a problem with it, show them your contract and I am sure that youy can point it out to them directly.

Sorry if I sounded harsh about the sugar thing....

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 9/12/2005 5:03:11 PM
Author: MINE!!
1st... is your state monitored by USDA? Are they certified by the state? I know that Va and a few others are. Therefore they have to adhere to a guideline for foods. But that could stir up a hornets nest if you find out that they are supposed to and confront them on it.

I''m pretty sure that the school is suppose to follow the USDA nutritional guidelines. And, I DID confront the owner over the phone. My son got into trouble one morning and was fussing and angry when I brought him in (he got a toy taken away) and when I took him to his play section, the teacher saw he was upset and after I told her he was in trouble, she gave him a piece of candy right there in front of me! I complained to the owner about this and the amount of sugar in general the kids are given and she was fake nice, saying, "oooh, no, we only give candy on birthdays, holidays, so this I''ll take care of this. . ." Then she didn''t talk to me for TWO WEEKS. Usually she''s around and says hi when parents come and go, but believe me, she was *hidding* from me.

Thanks for your advice. I''m going to talk AGAIN to the owner once I figure out a game plan. In real life, I tend to be a bit of a b*tch and tend to overspeak my mind, so I best be calm and prepared before discussing this w/her.

 

[Blue824]

Well, I''ll start off that I don''t have kids...but I''d think having them in the habit of eating so poorly would have a negative effect on them. Obviously they''re not eating that constantly, when they''re with you, but it does sound excessive. I used to work at an after school program at a Catholic school and we did serve an afternoon snack and we had a god balance of healthy and sweets. I don''t understand why the owners couldnt create that there. Do other parents feel that way?? I''d just say when your oldest son is ready to leave, take all of them out of there, at 3 they won''t have a hard time adjusting to a new environment. Montessori is really popular by me too, but would that necissarily solve what they were eating? and its probably a lot more expensive than a pre-school/daycare.

Amandapanda, I didnt attend Montessori but from what I understand, it groups children more by skill level than age, so children who might be bright in math (just an example) can work at a higher level than what in a more traditional school would dictate they study for their age. I also think there is no homework given. The education is based more on the individual child.

 

[gingerBcookie]

I don''t have any children, but my friends and my cousins all did TONS of research on the best place to send their kids to school (interviewed schools EVERYWHERE) and all HIGHLY recommend Montessori. One of my cousins is still a student but saves and sacrifices to send her son there because she really feels its the best environment for them. I can also tell you that during med school, we learned that healthy eating is so important right from the strat for kids. Not only does it help encourage healthy eating habits for life, but atherosclerosis (plaques in your arteries) actually start forming when we are children. AND the way fat cells work -- as you add fat, new cells form. When you lose fat, each cell shrinks proportionately, but you NEVER DECREASE THE NUMBER of cells(unless you physically remove them, i.e. liposuction); So the fat cells you acquire as children, stick with you for your entire life. AND don''t even get me started on the dangers of hypoglycemia/diabetes on health

. Please don''t underestimate that. I don''t know how your kids will react to a change in environment, but my honest opinion is that kids are resilient and I agree with whoever said earlier is better than later. You know your kids best and how they handle change. I would talk to a trusted pediatrician (rather than relying on a med-student-almost-resident

) about the diet and how much they think it will affect them (sometimes they over dramatize things in our lectures to help us remember, andit doesn''t neccesarily translate literally in real clinical situations

) and make an informed decision.

 

[jellybean]

Michelle -- if your son is hypoglycemic, then I believe only one day of not eating right would not be good for him. Also, what if something happened (god forbid) like he had a hypoglycemic episode while he was at the daycare? Would they know how to take care of him? The shaking when he is waking from a nap is only the start - it could escalate into a full blown seizure. The reason why he is shaking when waking up is because he is going too long between eating. He needs a snack before his nap. Will they be able to "bend the rules" and provide this for him, even if it's for medical reasons?

We are looking at daycare centers for our kids now so I know how hard it is to find a good place. I know you want to keep your kids in as stable an environment as possible but if that were my kids, I would put them in a different school == especially since you spoke with the owner and she doesn't care about your son's problem.

At the centers I looked at I got a copy of the menu so I could see for myself what they are serving the kids. Fortunately the one place we really like only serves 100% juice (not like Hawaiin Punch or things like that) and only white milk but it does use white bread for sandwiches.

I have noticed that I've been giving my daughter chocolate milk (per her request) before her nap (or what used to be her nap time!) and she definitely has trouble going to sleep now! I'm now going to have to dilute it with white milk big time.

Also, at least here where I live - not all montessori schools serve organic food. Make sure you find out if the one you're looking at does. I won't go onto a tangent about montessori schools but my cousin is a kindergarden teacher and she can always tell the students that did montessori preschool. She said they are much harder to get into the school routine (she teaches at a regular kindergarden) than those that went to a non-montessori preschool. But a lot of people like it so I think it's a very personal choice.

 

[icekid]

ok, I''m a little late on this... but I would not continue to let them attend that school. Anyone who is shoving sugar into little kids by the pound does not have their best interests in mind. Argh.... I would be so mad about this too, MC. Too much sugar is just not good for anyone! It''s no wonder that we''re seeing type II diabetes in children now.

I don''t have kids yet either, but if/when they will definitely go to Montessori schools. I''ve heard nothing but wonderful things from friends who attended them and parents who send their children to them! I think it really gives the kids a head start among their peers. In any event, I would definitely look into it! There has to be something better out there for your boys.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Hi everyone,

Thanks again for all your help. My husband was moved around a lot as a child, so he''s really against taking the boys out of this school regardless of the diet.

I talked to a nurse and she said the important thing is that after Dylan wakes up, is that he''s given a carb that''s low sugar. He IS eating right before his nap, so the shaking, I guess, indicates he''s crashing from a sugary lunch

My husband doesn''t want to do montessori. Him and I are not quite agreeing on what to do. The deal is the public elementary school that my kids will be attending is number one in our region. It''s got the highest test scores. My husband did a ton of research and learned about this. Our taxes for the school district are out of control, so this is another reason my husband doesn''t agree that our boys need to be in a private school, since we''re already paying for a school that''s not only top notch, but in addition, hires mostly teachers w/master''s.

Whatever happens, hopefully it''s positive! This is such a tough issue.