FuturePsyD
Shiny_Rock
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2010
- Messages
- 309
Hi Ladies,
Hope you all had a wonderful weekend. I wanted to vent a little and hopefully get some advice and opinions on my situation.
My bf and I got into a bit of an argument this weekend (not over engagement, rings, propsal, etc). In my moment of anger I said, just forget it we can't get along, I give up. Of course I was being immature and I really don't want to break up with him, I was just so frustrated and he was not understanding me or my feelings at ALL. This argument was followed by several more conversations, during one of which he blurted out, well you just ruined everything, I was doing everything I could to get your ring and propose while we were in Paris in March, but I guess thats not going to happen now since you broke up with me (we recently began planning a trip out there).
Evidently, in the heat of our argument, we both said things that we didn't want to say. We are not broken up and he really regrets saying anything.
The entire 5 years we've been together, he's known that I want to go to Paris. The past year we have been ring shopping and getting serious about becoming engaged, so he figured what better place than to propose in Paris. Of course I dreamt that a proposal may happen there but due to the cost of the trip, I didn't want to get my hopes up that he would also be able to afford my dream ring on top of it. I hoped, BUT I certainly wasn't convinced! His job hasn't been stable this past year (he's in marketing and the economy has REALLY affected that line of work) so I knew that if I wanted my dream ring, I may be in for a bit of wait. We both decided that for us, its worth the wait. So never did I dream that we would go to Paris AND for him to be able to save enough to get the ring as well. It's not like it was set in stone, because he did say that he was TRYING to make that happen. But even the fact that it was potentially possible is a big deal in my eyes. I felt, ok well at least I know he's really trying!
So, obviously, the cat is out of the bag now and the element of surprise is gone. However, my biggest concern is that IF he is able to get the ring before our trip, will he decide to NOT propose in Paris since he will think that I am expecting it? He's really big on wanting to surprise me and now I fear that my dream proposal may not happen because he would rather surprise me and do it some place much less desirable. For me, having the Paris proposal is much more important than being completely "surprised". I'm just scared now of getting my hopes up only to be left extremely disappointed. I'd like if you ladies could give me advice on how I should proceed from here and if I should say anything or just let it play out on its own and see if he brings it up to gauge my feelings on the matter?
Thank you & sorry so long!!
Hope you all had a wonderful weekend. I wanted to vent a little and hopefully get some advice and opinions on my situation.
My bf and I got into a bit of an argument this weekend (not over engagement, rings, propsal, etc). In my moment of anger I said, just forget it we can't get along, I give up. Of course I was being immature and I really don't want to break up with him, I was just so frustrated and he was not understanding me or my feelings at ALL. This argument was followed by several more conversations, during one of which he blurted out, well you just ruined everything, I was doing everything I could to get your ring and propose while we were in Paris in March, but I guess thats not going to happen now since you broke up with me (we recently began planning a trip out there).
Evidently, in the heat of our argument, we both said things that we didn't want to say. We are not broken up and he really regrets saying anything.
The entire 5 years we've been together, he's known that I want to go to Paris. The past year we have been ring shopping and getting serious about becoming engaged, so he figured what better place than to propose in Paris. Of course I dreamt that a proposal may happen there but due to the cost of the trip, I didn't want to get my hopes up that he would also be able to afford my dream ring on top of it. I hoped, BUT I certainly wasn't convinced! His job hasn't been stable this past year (he's in marketing and the economy has REALLY affected that line of work) so I knew that if I wanted my dream ring, I may be in for a bit of wait. We both decided that for us, its worth the wait. So never did I dream that we would go to Paris AND for him to be able to save enough to get the ring as well. It's not like it was set in stone, because he did say that he was TRYING to make that happen. But even the fact that it was potentially possible is a big deal in my eyes. I felt, ok well at least I know he's really trying!
So, obviously, the cat is out of the bag now and the element of surprise is gone. However, my biggest concern is that IF he is able to get the ring before our trip, will he decide to NOT propose in Paris since he will think that I am expecting it? He's really big on wanting to surprise me and now I fear that my dream proposal may not happen because he would rather surprise me and do it some place much less desirable. For me, having the Paris proposal is much more important than being completely "surprised". I'm just scared now of getting my hopes up only to be left extremely disappointed. I'd like if you ladies could give me advice on how I should proceed from here and if I should say anything or just let it play out on its own and see if he brings it up to gauge my feelings on the matter?
Thank you & sorry so long!!
anyway...once your BF does propose, however/wherever it is will be PERFECT. I would just let him do it how he wants and be surprised 
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